To My Readers: Sick as Hell

27 05 2008

All,

I feel like a bag of crap and am high on meds, so I won’t be writing today. Till tomorrow, please enjoy the following highlights from my weekend:

  • I pointed at two barely-dressed chicks outside 1223 nightclub and yell “LOOKA DEM HOOKERS!” They did not find this amusing
  • Chicken Jon spends the whole night referring to tech-savvy black people as ‘Niggabytes’
  • My buddy Mandrew, a freakishly strong but small individual (weighs 155, benches more than twice his body weight), picks up another friend of mine with one arm and body slams him on a bean bag chair for no particular fucking reason at all
  • I go out and down two carbombs, two white Russians, two B-52s, two black russians, a rum and gingerale, a shot of God knows what, and a long island. On an empty stomach.
  • As a result of my drunkenness, I give ‘the woman’ insanely bad directions back to my place. I am struggling the entire time not to vomit in her car
  • Back at my place, I vomit loudly and uncontrollably into my toilet
  • I wake up on the bathroom floor six hours later

Maybe this is why I don’t feel so good today…





To My Readers: How Popular This Blog Isn’t

3 04 2008

I received my 25th query today asking me to add the stats widget so people could see how many hits I’m getting.

Unfortunately, adding the stats widget would be contrary to my scruples regarding this blog, as I really don’t care how popular it is or (more accurately) isn’t. But for the truly curious – suffice it to say that this site is nowhere near as popular as, say, stuffebplike.com – which has roughly ten times as many hits as I do.

You who enjoy this blog are indeed the few and the proud. Welcome to the VIP section of racial satire.

-Chris