Self-Censorship

21 08 2008

I’m going to be calling out several of my own commenters with this post, but I don’t fucking care. If you go to the comments section of virtually any site that allows it (e.g. blogs, YouTube, Break.com, CNN.com, etc.), you will notice an inordinate number of comments like this:

“I don’t think Hillary had any business crying on television. It portrayed her as f*cking weak and set back the feminist movement by 30 years. Thanks, you f*cking c—”

or

“This guy approached me at a bookstore and had the nerve to ask for my number. What the fawk was he thinking? The shyt was just straight corny.”

Really? REALLY? Do you seriously fucking think that throwing an asterisk, or a hyphen, or spelling the word different somehow makes you better than people who actually swear? ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?!?!??!

Figure 1: Fucker.

The ludicrosity of censoring your typed swearing is surpassed only by the word ‘ludicrosity.’ Just think about the thought process involved:

“Ok, I’m pissed. I wanna swear, but that just wouldn’t be Christian. I’m a nice girl*, so how do I convey vulgarity without actually being vulgar. I know! I’ll disguise my swearing! If I don’t actually type the letters F U C K, then I won’t go to hell and everyone will still think I’m a nice person. Here we go! [types F $ # *]. Wow! I’m fucking awesome! Oops…I hope Jesus didn’t hear that!”

This kind of self-censorship is not unlike the “I’m not touching you” game. You put your finger as close as you can to someone’s face without actually touching them and, for good measure, you say “I’m not touching yoooooooou” in the most annoying voice you can muster. Inevitably, the person you’re not touching flips out and punches you in the scrotum. The offense you’re avoiding (touching someone) is far less annoying than coming incredibly close to doing it without actually doing it (“I’m not touching yooooooou”).

Figure 2: For the visual learner…

The next time you meet a self-censoring assfuck in person, please do at least one of the following:

1.) If it’s a girl and you’re a guy, pull out your penis. Chase her around the room yelling “I’m not raping yooooooooou!”

2.) If its’ one of your employees, grab a pink slip, wave it in her face, and say “I’m not firing yoooooooooou.”

3.) If it’s your girlfriend, make a videotape of you and her fucking, and blur out the genitalia. Show the tape to her family. When they flip out, say “what’s the problem? It’s censored!”

Figure 3: Same thing as ‘F*ck’

4.) Club her and eat her bones.

Please, if you want to curse, JUST FUCKING CURSE! Watch me: FUCK ASS SHIT DICK DOUCHE CUNT FART COCK DAMN HELL BUTTHOLE BALLS TWAT NUTSACK CUNNILINGUS GODDAMMIT MOTHERFUCK SONOFA’BITCH MCCAIN.

See? It’s easy and it makes you feel better. But most importantly, it doesn’t make you look like a fucking pompous asshole who thinks that typing ‘SH!T’ is somehow less offensive than just typing ‘SHIT’. If you insist on self-censorship, then I hope with every fiber of my being that you are reincarnated as a gut maggot.

* It’s ALWAYS a fucking girl

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695 responses

21 08 2008
Bratty

HAHAHAHA!!!

Priceless

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

SEGUNDO!!!

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Here’s one: LMBO…laughing my BOOTY off

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

well damn I do that shit all the time, but fuck it, I won’t from now on, lol

21 08 2008
kuki

lol @ McCain….haha

21 08 2008
Meka

I am so glad you are back on the block Chris!

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

So fucking true. I have a friend that says “Phuck”.

Makes my blood boil.

21 08 2008
Tasha

Bitch Shit Fuck

21 08 2008
Mr. Smith

Cunnilingus? Hilarious

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Chris…I agree and get annoyed when I actually hear in person, someone say, “Naw..F that!” or “What the h-e-double hockey sticks” or “She is a true B-word!” UGH..now at work, when I send emails through Outlook, I have to bleep out the curse words, “sh*t”, because the program detects curse words and will send that bitch right back…

BTW, I don’t think “fart, damn, hell, cunnilingus, or damn” are curse words

21 08 2008
Amadeo

I gotta make an exception for shyt (or shyte). If you see me type that…I’m actually thinking in an irish/scottish accent at the time. What is funny to me is sites that dont’ want you to cuss, but allow the censored version…um…we still get it.

21 08 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH…I don’t mind euphemisms. I say ‘crap’ instead of ‘shit’ a lot. But ‘fawking’ sounds stupid.

21 08 2008
Lindsay

LMAO @ “McCain.”

Can we make that a new cuss word?

I have the mouth of a sailor, so I can relate. Yay profanity!

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Because I put it in the other post and it fits the purpose of this one… Sho’nuff died. Un-FUCKING-Fair!

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

FUCK you Amadeo! (said with love) I feel the exact same way about shyt, it’s a totally different word in my mind. Hilarious.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

I also enjoy yelling, “Crikey”.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Crikey makes me chuckle.

21 08 2008
Jen

Glad to see you’re back. People were humming spirituals yesterday because you didn’t post.

21 08 2008
puff

As someone who gets called out on cursing too much on a daily basis, I’m glad to know my potty mouth and I have free licence to swear till my tongue/fingers fall off.

P.S. Does anyone know why the fuck the starbucks in union station has a queue as long as my ass so early in the morning? Have me sleeping on the train like an idiot *smh*

21 08 2008
sarah

Sugar Honey Iced Tea

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

And I know we are so past the http://www.beyonceitis.com website, but reading this had me silently crying at my desk

“Once security escorted Beyonce to her room, and Jay left to drive Tina to Bingo down at the church, I felt that it was the right time to have a private talk with Rihanna. I said “Look, RiRi, I know you’re new here and I’m not sure how they do things in the islands, but up here in the United States, when you talk to a dude’s girlfriend like that, you’re asking for trouble. I’m giving you a friendly warning, but you got off easy. Lucky for you Beyonce is trying to walk right with Jesus, but in her sinning days Beyonce would have come out of her bag on you and would have been your face and a boxcutter, so in the future you might want to watch how you talk to her.

Then Rihanna had the nerve to interrupt me and said “Whatever! I’m the new hottest chick on the block, give me 6 months and Jay won’t even remember who Beyonce is!”

That was the last time I spoke to Rihanna.

I tried to tell Beyonce but there’s nothing I can do because it’s my word against Rihanna’s. I told Baby Daniel and he offered to take Solange’s 1991 Honda Civic and bring it to a real slow creep around Rihanna’s block, but I told him not to.

I wrote all of that to say DO NOT fall for the “Good Girl, Gone Bad” shit. She ain’t just gone bad. She’s been a ho since day one. “

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Sarah

I enjoyed that song.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I am a fan of Fyuck Hyu as well, thank you Dave Chappelle (I am top player hater from Japan!)

Gene Upshaw also died today http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3545830

21 08 2008
Jen

a. “I’m not raping you” immediately gave me a very specific visual image of a nude heathen jumping over a couch to terrorize a paper-fan-waving Whitley Gilbert type.

b. Even though I occasionally self-censor, I have no idea why. I curse like a sailor, and everybody who knows me knows, especially Jesus. Maybe I do care somewhere deep inside that I’m not a perfect little lady.

21 08 2008
LEO

FIRST

21 08 2008
Knatural

No. The Shogun of Harlem! He was supposed to die in a ninja fight or something, not pancreatic cancer. Not fair.

About censorship? One thing I hate is when parent-age adults believe I’m not “allowed” to swear. Just because I’m young enough to be your child doesn’t mean that I’m not a full grown adult. Kiss my ass.

21 08 2008
vitazza

I don’t give a flying pig fuck if your offened by my spelling of shyt!!! So glad your back babe

21 08 2008
LEO

SHIT i thougt i was first

21 08 2008
sarah
21 08 2008
Jay_Everyday

LMAO@ McCain. That’s gonna be my new cuss word.

“Stupid ass McCains always wanna talk shit!”

21 08 2008
sarah

LEO, what the McCain?!

21 08 2008
LEO

I hate my FUCKING job

21 08 2008
LEO

@sarah. lol i don’t know

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Damn, both from pancreatic cancer…I betta get my shit checked.

For the rest of the day I’m working “Sho’Nuff” into conversation as much as I can…which is alot.

“Who’s the baddest mofo down and around this town?!?!?!”

21 08 2008
LEO

I’m half sleep

21 08 2008
LEO

I curse when i’m mad and around my close firend, but when i’m around my family, my brain outomatically chuts off and i become a good christian girl.

21 08 2008
LEO

Chris, i’m glad you are back.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Amadeo:

I sho nuff think that we should honor Sho nuff, by incorporating into every comment

21 08 2008
Jen

@sarah – I liked that photo when they showed it on Dreamgirls. I tried to find it for a while to see how well the makeup artist did. But, s/he didn’t do a very good job around the brow bone or lips.

But, yeah…she looks better as a Masai beauty queen or whatever she is supposed to be there than she did as an Eastern European discount escort, which is the look that was captured when they lightened the L’Oreal ad.

21 08 2008
sarah

Amadeo is replacing Baconator with Sho’ Nuff today 😦

21 08 2008
overit

lol you know i usually try to avoid swearing in general, but as you can see in previous comments like in the “what this bog isnt” category, some ppl make me step out smetimes, and its quite therapeutic. i feel its just one of those things ppl do, it dont make no sense..but it happens.

i agree 100% its stupid and you might as well type the word out and it completely defeats the purpose. but like in your clubbing post, you clearly think its the worst but you realize people still go, porn is stupid, but people still watch it. i think there are a lot of things we do cause we think its right, cool, or do just to do but can be pointless when it really comes down to it.

but the overall message of this post, pretentiousness, is important. i just got an email from a John Doe, MPA…its in his email address.

21 08 2008
Sandybaby

Chris you are HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

21 08 2008
overit

“This kind of self-censorship is not unlike the “I’m not touching you” game. You put your finger as close as you can to someone’s face without actually touching them and, for good measure, you say “I’m not touching yoooooooou” in the most annoying voice you can muster. Inevitably, the person you’re not touching flips out and punches you in the scrotum. The offense you’re avoiding (touching someone) is far less annoying than coming incredibly close to doing it without actually doing it (”I’m not touching yooooooou”).”

This one had me ROLLIN, why did my little brother used to do that? Put his hands inches from my face and repeat “you dont own the air” over and over again.

clearly it always led to some kind of furniture moving.

21 08 2008
Grandpa Abe Simpson

ehhh..this post wasn’t so muthasucking great! chris is getting lazy!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

You can swear all you want in a Latino household, but let your parents hear you say something Jesus wouldn’t like in spanish and you will catch a beatdown.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Are u f*ckin serious? I write shyt like this to show how Gotdamned clever I can phuckn b. Fluck anybody that opens they bytch azz mouth talkin dat censorsh*t. Ninja’s betta wreckonize. and ain’t no F*GGOT asz Nuccas gon tell me sh– about what I can and can’t do; I’m a goshdarn G. Friggin A-holes!

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

For your amusement: http://www.bawdylanguage.com/links.shtml

I’m currently at the “The world’s largest collection of masturbation synonyms”. I don’t care what anyone says about censorship, that dirty word “masturbation” is now forever replaced in my lexicon as “Hee-haw with my wrinkled Mee-Maw”

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Has anyone seent those hilarious Orbit Gum commercials?

“You mind your business KumKwat”
“Who you calling a KumKwat, you Lint Licker”
“Where’s our game book?” “I don’t know check your Donkey Door!”
“Hey, now look here you Cankle Bandits!”

The FUNNIEST commercials on T.V.!!!!

rotl

21 08 2008
sarah

i havent check my oil in a while

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Doc

I always liked “having a date with Ms. Palmer and her 5 sisters.”

wrestling with the trouser snake.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Doc:

What about twat-bumpers, booty-bandits and coal-snatchers?

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Saying Hi to my one-eyed monster.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

playing the flesh piano

21 08 2008
sarah

my favorite (from Family Guy) is “fire off some knuckle children”

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Brushing The Beaver

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

The five-finger hustle with Russel the one-eyed love muscle

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

wow all of these sound horrible, lol

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

cuntlets, flapdoodles, i still like furburger, golden doughnut, piss flaps, poozle, pudendum, sperm sucker, Yeast-powder biscuit.

21 08 2008
Jen

We will not refer to female masturbation as applying lip gloss.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I asked one of my coworkers if they heard who died. They said, “yea, the saxophonist from Dave Matthews Band?” It was all I could do to not jump up and ninja kick them while yelling, “Now when I say who’s da masta, you say Sho’Nuff!”

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

“The five-finger hustle with Russel the one-eyed love muscle”

I can’t take it.

21 08 2008
Quiet Storm

Im sho’nuff guilty of the self-censor s!@#. Oh mother-f@#$ing well. 🙂

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Doc wins.

21 08 2008
Knatural

The five-finger hustle with Russel the one-eyed love muscle

AAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAH I HATE YOU AHAHAH…

21 08 2008
Jen

Best quote ever about masturbation:

Don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone I love.

–Woody Allen

How I love thee, awkward pervert.

21 08 2008
sarah

yeast-powder biscuit?! thats not right. neither is beaver nor coochie.

referring to a vag as a coochie sounds nasty. when i hear coochie it sounds like it should follow bad words: dirty coochie, itchy coochie, stank coochie.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

And Chris returns with a bang! Don’t think you’re forgiven for just ditching us yesterday, though.

“1.) If it’s a girl and you’re a guy, pull out your penis. Chase her around the room yelling “I’m not raping yooooooooou!””

*Can’t breathe* Ok, forgiven.

LOVE the Orbit commercials. I use “What the french toast” quite regularly around the little ones. The big ones, too.

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

cootchie sounds like something a 6 year old says, not a grown ass adult
BTW I am feeling liberated with my full fledged cussing

21 08 2008
Amadeo

My favorite word to call someone…FUCK-O.

It just…pops.

21 08 2008
EJ

@ Sarah – I never minded coochie, I actually prefer it to other vagina pseudonyms. I have a severe aversion to hearing the word pussy. When I hear it in conversation it has the same affect on me as if someone had poured cold water down my back … It just catches me off guard.

21 08 2008
Jen

P.S. Was I the only person who was reminded of the final scene from season three of Curb Your Enthusiasm by the latter bit of this entry?

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

EJ:

I totally agree, hearing “the P-word” or C–T makes me wanna shudder!

21 08 2008
Effing for (Goddess Remy) Tracks

LoL. This made me chuckle. I don’t think I self-censor. But I do say “effing”. Only because it sounds girlier than “fucking” if you wanna say something like “That’s the ugliest effing shirt I’ve ever seen.”

21 08 2008
Knatural

All of you need your mouths washed out with soap…

21 08 2008
Jay_Everyday

@ Doc

My personal fav. has always been Palmetta and FisTina.

21 08 2008
Dom

Some sites wont post your comments if you swear, esp blogs that are trying to make sure they dont violate office internet policies for adult content.

And you’re right, it IS always a girl…A**hole!

21 08 2008
EJ

I never understood what the big deal was about cursing anyway. Why would people make up words that no one is allowed to say?

21 08 2008
Cheekie

“I gotta make an exception for shyt (or shyte). If you see me type that…I’m actually thinking in an irish/scottish accent at the time.”

I do this, too, only I spell it “shite”. I’m a little wary about putting the letter ‘y’ where it doesn’t belong. It just looks like that “OMGZ” kinda speak. Anyhow, I’ve loved how the Irish pronounced it since hearing it in movies…like dude on Titanic.

Only time I’d put an asterisk is on forums that don’t allow the entire word spelled out, which is stupid because they should know damn well that we’re thinking of the REAL word when we read asterisk words like “sh*t”. I mean, how do they think we’re pronouncing it in our heads? Shasteriskt? Or Shbleept? No, sillies, we’re saying Shit. Or is it better because we’re only saying it in our heads. Wrong! Jeebus can hear you in there, too!! In fact, probably even clearer.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

My mother cursed like a sailor in two languages! Even if I had no T.V., radio or contact with the outside world, i would have known every bad word possible…I was suspended for a day in kindergarten for calling a little cauc boy a Honkie

21 08 2008
Jen

I think that “fuck” is a curse word just because it is Germanic and everybody hates Germans.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

To Quote Eric Cartman: “Cussing doesn’t hurt anyone see, Fuck Fuck Fuckity Fuck Fuck”

21 08 2008
Cheekie

I’m a big fan of compound cuss words with the word “ass” like assclown, asshat, assBobJohnson…the list goes on.

21 08 2008
Lindsay

“assBobJohnson”

hahahahahahaha

21 08 2008
thechad1911

did this ni**a really just say “twat”?

21 08 2008
Effing for (Goddess Remy) Tracks

Who decided the curse words were curse words anyway?

I remember hearing kids say ‘we shouldn’t get in trouble for saying hell and damn cause they’re in the Bible’ when i was growing up but if i said either in front of my mama i woulda got my ass (which is also in the Bible) whupped.

21 08 2008
thechad1911

some curse words were originated as acronyms… i.e.

FUCK – Fornicate Under Consent of the King: started from ancient monarchs who would actually hire and allow other men to sleep with his wife when he was away or busy or just plain didn’t want to…

SHIT – Ship High In Transit: from cargo that would ruin if it got wet on trans- Atlantic shipments. the letters S.H.I.T. would be written on the crates as instruction to be placed on higher levels.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Chad, that was the most useless education I have ever received. lol

21 08 2008
Jen

@ the Chad – urban legends

21 08 2008
Knatural

shitty shitty fag fag

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Jen

What, not a fan of Fornication Under Consent of the King

A poet I know came up with a joint called, “I want to Feed U Constant Knowledge.”

21 08 2008
thechad1911

hey, even if it’s not true it… it still sounds f*ckin awesome…

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

more like Feed U Constant Kingsnake

21 08 2008
Edumucated

This is really unrelated, but has anyone heard Mr. President by Young Jeezy and Nas? It is actually a really good song and Young Jeezy actually said something more than “Jeezy likes to drink, Jeezy likes to smoke, Jeezy likes to mix Arm&Hammer with his coke.” http://www.zshare.net/audio/17314009a089b633/

21 08 2008
Jen

I am pretty sure most of the major curse words are Germanic. I’m thinking shit, fuck and cunt, in particular.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

This post is making me miss George Carlin.

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

When I write emails at work, I use $%@# and shit b/c I sho’nuf don’t want my email to be flagged down by The Man. Then they’d be all up in my face like, “What’s a 2520 and why are you gonna choke a bitch?” And I usually censor the word ni@@a when I’m on this blog. I don’t know why. I’ll stop.

Fuck Bob Johnson

Baconator

21 08 2008
thechad1911

yea…. not to mention richard pryor and bernie mac..

“The word ‘muthafucka’ is a noun…. it describes a person, place or thing…”

21 08 2008
Cheekie

“Who decided the curse words were curse words anyway?”

That’s what I wanna know! Like what if was one of those situations like the word “gay” where it used to just mean “happy”. Like what if “fuck” meant “dance” back in the day? As in, “Good morning, kind sir, would you like to go to the Hammonds Ball for round of fucking?”.

21 08 2008
sarah

EJ, i actually like the word pussy. if a man has a nice voice, it should turn me on.

21 08 2008
EJ

@ Sarah – Not sure how I’d feel to hear a man refer to my lady parts like that … in the throws of passion, I know it would turn me on but I mean, it would have to be the hair pulling slap my ass type of sex …

In everyday conversation … I just don’t like it … and I can’t say it without stuttering …

21 08 2008
EJ

“Good morning, kind sir, would you like to go to the Hammonds Ball for round of fucking?”

LMAO

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I just looked “fuck” up on Wikipedia, hilarious.

21 08 2008
Knatural

During the throes of passion? HELL YEAH!

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Chad

Sho’nuff

21 08 2008
sarah

i was just logging in to MySpace and what do i see on the homepage?

How do you achieve world piece? Bacon is always the answer! Meatatarians Unite!

so Wendy’s is promoting the Baconator on MySpace and my world has just imploded. on the upside, they are giving away a year’s worth of Frosties.

21 08 2008
former lurker

only reason i sometimes censor myself and say f*ck instead of FUCK is cuz i used to work at a place that blocked websites with cuss words/ inappropriate content. but hell, everyone else on this site is doing it so…..SHIT FUCK DAMN CUNT DICK PUSSY

21 08 2008
Cheekie

“on the upside, they are giving away a year’s worth of Frosties.”

HOW can I be a part of this? I must know.

21 08 2008
sarah
21 08 2008
Muse

Screw it, I have to go against the grain on this one. I cuss when I type online but in real life I try to avoid using vulgarity as much as possible especially around my elders, parents, and young children. There is no point in using profanity. My personal pet peeve is when a man I’m dating cusses at me. It feels like an act of violence. Speak to me with respect, don’t cuss at me. However if someone is joking around or just relaxing around friends, I don’t have a major issue with cursing.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

“on the upside, they are giving away a year’s worth of Frosties.”

HOW can I be a part of this? I must know.

Sho’ nuff, put us down!

21 08 2008
Jen

@Muse – agree with you about men cursing at women. I don’t know why, but that just feels shocking.

21 08 2008
Muse

A man cusing at me feels so violent.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I just have a problem with people who curse because they have nothing else in their vocabulary to express themselves with. When I hear people on my block saying things like “Naw, Nigga fuck that bitch ass bitch, she ain’t shit but another ho so fuck her nigga.” It sounds a little ignorant, but I swear more than I should, but I also have more in my vocabulary, so fuck it.

21 08 2008
Ethel

@ TheChad911 — ok, Fuck [or f.u.c.k.] now seems so much less dirty. How fun is it to have sex with actually APPROVAL of the king/parental figure? Not very. Illicit sex is thought to be more fun, which is why folks mess around on their spouses….

On the whole cursing thing, in my head, not all curse words are equal. Like if I think a girl is a bitch, she’s mean–possibly temporarily–but if she’s a cunt, there’s no hope and she’s been kicked off my personal island.

I wonder if other’s have the curse word heirarchy in their heads.

21 08 2008
thechad1911

this is way off topic… but i went to see Pineapple Express… that shyt was pretty dayum funny!

21 08 2008
TheChad

i think “twatwaffle” is the funniest word imaginable to call someone…

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Curse words should be used like punctuation. You don’t just throw periods and exclamation marks everywhere.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

AHAHAHAHA @ twatwaffle. It looks so Dr. Seussian. Love it.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Fucking funny ass post.

I admit to sensoring only where my parents are reading my shit, simply because they love to make awkward conversation about it in front of their friends as if I’m not a grown ass woman.

Other than that, I’m like a sailor, unless I’m on the job.

21 08 2008
Monie

Great f**king post Chirs! Self-censorship drives me f**king crazy, that sh*t is so g*ddammed stupid!

21 08 2008
Jen

Negro Hierarchy of Profanity

Biblical curse words (hell, damn, ass)*
Non-biblical Anglic curse words (bitch)**
Common Germanic curse words (fuck***, shit)
Common curse words which refer to genitals (dick, pussy)****
2520 curse words (cunt, twat, douche)*****

*these are acceptable to say around your mama when you are grown
**these are acceptable to say around members of your immediate family your age or younger where they are not transexually directed
***derivative of “fuck, “motherfucker, has transferred to the same tier as non-biblical Anglic curse words in many Negro households
****if your mama ever hears you say either of these words, you go straight to hell
*****there is no reason to use these words around exclusively Negro company unless the word references the egregious behavior of 2520s or the emulation of 2520s

21 08 2008
Monie

Chirs = Chris

21 08 2008
Jen

One more note – despite what is said in public, “nigger” and “nigger derivatives” such as “nigga,” “niggrish” and “niggerig” are rarely profane in Negro households.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Wait, wait…douche is a cuss word? Cuz my Mama and my aunt use to call each other douches with [insert number of] stems. It’s a running joke between them because they were so close. They still do it. And now I say it as well. Did she teach me bad habits? Because if so? Best Mom in the world.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Cheekie

Russell the love muscle grew three sizes that day.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

I sho nuff gots to get with that year supply of frosties

shit
fuck
cock
cunt
bitch
nigga
pussy

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

Baconator

21 08 2008
TheChad

“Russell the Love Muscle” would be a great saturday morning cartoon… he needs a sidekick though… or maybe two… who would be significantly shorter, rounder and can’t seem to get from under his shadow…

and i don’t know about y’all but my mother taught me how to curse… inadvertently… i used to listen to her curse at my dad and sister and that lady is a surgeon with profanity…. they cut so sharp…

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

“But also, black folks are always talking about how we should be uplifting the race with our programming. If a little booty doesn’t uplift you, I don’t know what will.”- BET President of Entertainment Reggie Hudlin

wow, I’m mad at that, and yet strangely agreeable.

21 08 2008

1.) If it’s a girl and you’re a guy, pull out your penis. Chase her around the room yelling “I’m not raping yooooooooou!”

ahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

21 08 2008
aceklub

@ Edumucated

Yea, that Jeezy track is pretty tight, definitely a different vibe for Jeezy.

21 08 2008
B4Prez

I guess I’m one of the guilty parties on this one. I don’t do it to feel better about cursing, I do it because it makes me feel less guilty about the fact that I’m cursing on a site that I shouldn’t be on on my work computer.

And I had a baconator last night.

21 08 2008

motherfucking shitty ass bitch…fuck that shit!

21 08 2008
Cheekie

BenAfficial – “Russell the Love Muscle” would be a great saturday morning cartoon… he needs a sidekick though… or maybe two… who would be significantly shorter, rounder and can’t seem to get from under his shadow…

Ha! Yes! And it would have play on words in relation to Russell, like “Weenie” or something. And it should be on The Disney Channel because they are pretend prudes.

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

I curse as punctuation (cosign Amadeo) and I do have a heirarchy of words in my head. But I will NEVER say anything remotely curse-like around my parents or other family, even as a grown ass woman. Not only is it disrespectful, but the last time I said something that SOUNDED like a cuss word, my mom slapped me so hard I realized that birds do, in fact, circle your head when you get knocked the FUCK out. And she did that shit without confriming that I actually cussed (even though I didn’t)– and I was 24.

so let me get this straight… Wendy’s is giving away a years worth of FATASS for free? God help us all…

21 08 2008
Cheekie

I’m not sure ya’ll heard me so Imma yell in net-speak: HOW DO YOU SIGN UP FOR FREE FROSTIES FOR A YEAR, please?

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Russell the Love Muscle and The Giggle Berries Adventures in TwatWaffle.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

russell the love muscle and Ted-sticles

21 08 2008
Cheekie

“Russell the Love Muscle and The Giggle Berries Adventures in TwatWaffle.”

Oh, my…

Pick this UP, Disney! Think of the children!

21 08 2008
Dustin

Why is “fart” a cuss word?

21 08 2008
TheChad

i’m a grown a$$ man….

is it ok if i refer to my nuts as Giggle Berries… all i need is ONE confirmation and so it shall be…

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@cheekie –

The way u get free frosties is by sending me free baconator coupons…

21 08 2008
Cheekie

@ TheChad

Chuck Norris: You are permitted to use that term, my child.

So, yeah, Chuch Norris’ confirmation is EVERYone’s confirmation.

21 08 2008
TheChad

and so Giggle Berries it is…

21 08 2008
Muse

A man who refers to his testicles as giggle berries is gay.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ this conversation.
lmao @ Jen’s curseword hierarchy.

lmfao at the fact I want to change my facebook status to fucking fuckery for the hell of it.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

OMG…damn America where you gotta do everything yourself

Free Frosties for a Year: http://www.frosty.com/index.tbapp

And then, after entering, it takes you to this instant game for one free frosty. Obviously, I didn’t win the instant Frosty or I wouldn’t be HERE, I’d be at Wendy’s.

21 08 2008
TheChad

@muse: i strongly beg to differ…. what if i use it in the “throws of passion” with a female? is it ok then?

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Giggle Berries works and it sounds clean.

That’s it…gentle with the giggle berries.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Dammit! Lost my post. I tried to put a link here and it poofed into thin air. They probably want only me to enter. Anyhow, go to Wendy’s website, it’s on the homepage. And then when you enter, there’s an instant game for a Free Frosty coupon.

Obviously I didn’t win the instant Frosty or I wouldn’t be HERE right now, I’d be a Wendy’s.

21 08 2008
Angry IV

Dude I don’t know what fucking asterisk you’re referring to at the end of your goddamn mother fucking post, dammit!

21 08 2008
Uninspired Muse

“* It’s ALWAYS a fucking girl”

Go suck a fuck, homeskillet!
Girls are more delicate, thats why we do it.

(Ok, that didnt even convince me)

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Cheekie:

You sho nuff ain’t the only one! every time i try to post a link on here, it poofs into thin air as well!

I believe that it’s a CONSPIRACY between Chris, Shabooty, Stuff White People Love and the Wendy’s Corporation…

~Baconator…OUT~

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

That’s fine. I’ll market Ted Stickels with the porn industry, maybe I’ll get some takers there. Or he can be the next botox spokesman, courtesy of Dave Chappell.

21 08 2008
TheChad

Ted Stickels sounds like either a villain or a news anchor…

i hate it when people censor sh^t by switching letters like: nuckin futs, or sick my duck…

21 08 2008
Cheekie

JessAKA Rabbitt: Yeah, it happens every time! The first couple times I tried to post links here it was fine, but lately? Impossible.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I don’t remember who mentioned it before, but it is very true:

Chris, why the hell are you putting dirty photos next to the “last commented” area?? And its usually cooter…why not nudie photos of you?

…sorry, hormones.

21 08 2008
Dustin

YES!!!!!!!! Nude photos of Chris, please!

21 08 2008
nubnqtndc

“What the McCain?!” (I am putting aside “what the mary enoch ezra and jonas?!” and picking this one up)
“Russell the Love Muscle and The Giggle Berries Adventures in TwatWaffle.”
Funniest crap, shith and fluckery I’ve heard all week!!!

21 08 2008
LEO

You all watch Prime time crime last night?

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

heyyy… i like saying ‘nucking futs’… it tickles me so

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmfao @ beyonceitis.com….

Yes, I’m fucking late…but I’m having too much fun on there making fun of the illiterate Ashitty fans…

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Fuckery is also a great word.

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

Giggle Berries reminds me of crunch berriers which is my fav so it’s okay to me

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

*berries

21 08 2008
Jeresmom

fuckery is a GREAT word

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

my fave Bernie Mac Quote:

“If people don’t like you for who you are….FUCK EM! FUCK EM ALL!!!”

I die everytime I see that.

21 08 2008
Saun

Fuck is my favorite word in the english language. It’s the only word I know that can be a noun, verb, adj, adv, etc.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

eww don’t you ever say giggle berries in the throws of passion

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

my take on cussing http://afrodemia.blogspot.com/2008/04/fuck-fuck-damn.html
Yes its a poor neglected blog but i’m a busy bitch ok…

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Leo – I caught the tail end of that special. Seemed pretty good.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Conjugation of all cuss words is fantastic. Giggleberries reminds me of the Gummi Bears and Smurfs (garglemel smurfberries something) and that would take me so far out of the mood. And i would immediately think of you as prepubescent and possibly female. Not good. plus berries are teeny tiny. Not that you want huge balls but teeny tiny ones just seem bad

YAY dustin is back! I was just thinking about you this morning.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

*Co-signs nudie photos of Chris.*

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

BOLLOCKS!

21 08 2008
LEO

@B4Prez. yes it was really good, i wish every state has that kind of program. I didn’t know which state that was because started waching it from the middle.

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

@WNBT… what you know about BOLLOCKS??!?

21 08 2008
Knatural

Giggle Berries is gay.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

*Requests that there be no nude photos of Chris unless there is an equal option for male readers*

Gargamel sounds like something I want done to my giggle berries.

21 08 2008
Knatural

Garamel was a pedophile.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I’m bloody British in my bones(and my granny). Am I the only black person in this country who regularly says ‘what the bloody fuck’? Or what the bloody blue blazes? Bollocks i say, BOLLOCKS!

I also like old timey cussing.

I should add that to a romantic profile. Likes: peanut butter milkshakes, walks on the beach, old timey cussing.

21 08 2008
Quiet Storm

“BOLLOCKS!”

It giggle everytime Chef Ramsay says it. He cannot complete a sentence without saying it. “Grow some fucking bollocks or get out the kitchen!”-Chef Ramsay on “Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares”

21 08 2008
Meka

Russell the Love Muscle and The Giggle Berries Adventures in TwatWaffle.

dead.

21 08 2008
Quiet Storm

my bad. I meant ‘I’ not ‘It’.

21 08 2008
Knatural

Gargamel*

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Gargamel sounds like something caught in the back of my throat after gargameling hairy giggle berries

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

@WNBT.. you are a Brit as well? Blimey, I thought I was the only one!

And thought I haven’t lived there in some years, when I say “OH BLOODY HELL!!!” I do it with all the relish of my nearly forgone accent. WHAT IN THE BLOODY BLUE BLAZES?!?!is another favorite, and I commonly refer to random ass men as BLOKES.

Dammit, its time for a trip to London…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Has anyone else been to the Museum of sex? there’s an old time cartoon there where this man was getting buck with a woman and a crab came out and winched off his will and it ran down the beach. I think that should be called Russell the love muscle and the giggle berries adventures in twatwaffle

21 08 2008
Meka

willnotbetelevised please stop…just stop. hahha

21 08 2008
shabooty

that’s one thing you can’t accuse me of doing …i let words fly… at the speed of sound… get it cause like if i say a word and you hear it the sound waves move at sound speed.. damn i’m genius.

21 08 2008

“oh baby, that feels good…don’t stop…that’s right SUCK THOSE GIGGLE BERRIES”

FUCK OUTTA HERE! LOL

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ WNBT

I like saying “Bloody Hell” I also enjoy asking “Are you taking the piss?”

I’d visit london just for the language.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Never been there to jolly old england but my granny was part of the 2 first black families in Brixton during the war. She used the word bloody in every sentence. And brit humor is the dogs’ bollocks

21 08 2008
Knatural

Giggle berries sound artificially flavored.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Alfonso Ribiero (aka Carlton Banks) new role:

lmfao!!!

21 08 2008
Muse

I dunno about Nudie pics of Chris. He What if you ladies end up disappointed? What if Chris has a 2 inch penis and basketball size testicles? Or he might have popeyes chicken crumbs in his pubic hair. What then? The fantasty would be over unless you are into that sort of thing.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT: “Gargamel sounds like something caught in the back of my throat after gargameling hairy giggle berries”

BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ Muse….

…but then again, how many girls got turned off by the nudie of Lenny Kravitz exposing his little ding-dong?

21 08 2008
Tamz

V For Vendetta introduced me to bollocks.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Attention:

Chris just announced on Facebook that he will purchase a Baconator and a box of Giggle Berries Cereal for each of us since he missed yesterday’s post!!!!!!*

*i made this up (shit, fart, fuck, damn)

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Hahaha @ Muse. Point.

Well, there’s always Photoshop…

21 08 2008
Knatural

Lenny Kravitz has nude photos? And it’s wittle?

21 08 2008
Amadeo

For a minute I thought Shabooty was doing a Ghostface…

“Cause you say the word, then here they come with the world…trying to flip and bounce it….”

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Leo – Yea, I think it was Baltimore. But yea, ppl would be so surprised if they knew how much can come from giving troubled hoodrats a voice and a platform. It’s a chance for them to finally not have to be so hard and put up such a front.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I wanted to cry, because he is so sexy otherwise…

21 08 2008
MsMilan

HILARIOUS!!!!!! I couldn’t have said it better myself even though I am an occasional…. okay, I’m lying, a repeat offender myself. Thanks for making me rethink my life and my reason for being. (j/k) I’m sooooo gonna miss the blog. Can’t wait for the project. 🙂

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

the video i’m talking about

21 08 2008
Muse

I’m just saying. Maybe Chris has a penis that wraps around his leg and doens’t have chicken crumbs on his privates. Who knows. One of my guy friends was jocking this girl for a long time and he finally he got to sleep with her…However he came away from the experience traumatized because apparently this female had a huge clit that looked like a baby penis.

21 08 2008
Muse

She was known as Man-Clit in our circle after that.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

OMG…fuck you Muse for that story! LMAAOOOOOOOOO

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ LEO and B4

What was that on…I hate missing anything Bmore on tv.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

I knew Lenny Kravitz had a small shabooty with all those tight ass jeans he wears, I’m surprised he could even have children!

Bloody Giggle Berry Gargling Baconator Five Finger Hustlin Bloke!

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ man clit!!!

Muse, you just seem like you’re such the innocent one, yet, you say things like these…lmao!!!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Don’t go to sleep/get drunk around Muse

Also I don’t know about ya’ll but I don’t want a cereal that tastes like testes

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

willnotbetelevised (18:05:48) : Don’t go to sleep/get drunk around Muse

*sad worried face*

21 08 2008
ph2072

Self-censorship? No sir, not here. Fuck outta here with that bullshit. 😉

Hilarious blog entry.

From a self-professed potty mouth.

21 08 2008
Knatural

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MAN CLIT!
I saw that once in a…film. Gross.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT: That cartoon!!!!! Heeeeee!!!! Damn I wish I had know about that when I used to do A/V, that video so would’ve been “accidentally played” during some lame professor’s powerpoint.

1. Not that the crab came OUT her pussy!
2. Why the bitch named Everready?!
3. The surprise ending….*faint*

21 08 2008
Muse

Hehe oh Doc, no worries. ::EVIL GRIN::

21 08 2008
Dekela

TwatWaffle sounds like a German concentration camp for some reason…

21 08 2008
Muse

Chaotic did I give you the impression that I was innocent? Bahaha. I look like trouble LOL.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

ANd if you guys seen a pic of Muse she grins like a cat!
and cats are inherently evil

I watched it 3 times in a row at the museum. Theres nothing as classic as a watching a cartoon penis run down the road using its balls as legs

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Deke, you’re right when you say it allowed. However it would be spelled tuietweffuel with some umlauts thrown around

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ both muse and wntb….what kind of people are you??!?

*runs to corner, sits cross legged and starts rocking*

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

I can’t wait til I get off work so that I can open all the naughty videos and pics…hehe

~stir it like coffee. stir it like muthafuckin coffee!~

21 08 2008
Muse

My grin represents all the naughty thoughts that go through my head 23hrs a day.

Man Clit..that’s so funny. I crack up everytime we talk about her. She’s a really pretty girl. I wonder if women with big clits have an easier time reaching orgasm.

Well I’ve officially changed the subject back to sex once again. Thank you thank you thank you.

21 08 2008
Knatural

I don’t know. Photos of penii (that I’ve never experienced) don’t really do it for me. I guess I’m not that visual.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

out loud! not allowed. damn

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

…It is soooo hard for me not to add hot guys to my facebook profile for staring at and making inappropriate comments on their walls…especially when I already like to play grab ass in the club.

I actually plan to play grab ass tonight…sexxay men beware!

…sorry, hormones.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

i never claimed any innocence (well not my own thats for sure)

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ knat…some people are just more hands on than visual.

hehe…

21 08 2008
TomatoHead

Hey now, you can’t say Lenny Kravitz has a tiny peen from that picture because it’s all neatly tucked away.

And I agree with Knat, seeing a picture of a penis is not going to make me horny. Not in the slightest.

Oh and FUCK COCK SHIT MOTHERFUCKERS ASSERY.

I believe there was just a tiny earthquake…or someone with a “thyroid problem” is walking in my apartment building.

21 08 2008
Dekela

@ Muse – Yes, yes they do

@WNTB – The story of Gargamel at tuietweffuel sounds like a holocaust story or a Harry Potter book

21 08 2008
Muse

Chaotic that’s sexual harassment. What if you grab a guys ass and he turns around and grabs a handful of you vagina? What will you do then?

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Damn…now I can’t help but think how I would react to a man-clit.

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Jen:

One more note – despite what is said in public, “nigger” and “nigger derivatives” such as “nigga,” “niggrish” and “niggerig” are rarely profane in Negro households.

True-er words have never been spoken

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

pinching dudes ass is hilarious. They get so shocked. I had roommate who used to play a game where you had to stroke random men. Usually on the back but you got extra points for stroking a dudes face. She did it to a super YT 2520 guy once in a group of guys (yes she was drunk) and then stood there and asked him if wanted to holla. He had no idea what she meant and then said no after standing there confused for a while. I don’t know what woulda happened if he said yes. Probably more hilarious story

21 08 2008
Samia

I thought people did that because some people have those little profanity filters on their work computers?

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Leo, I watched primetime Crime last night. What did you think? I couldn’t help but wonder if something like that would work in atlanta. It thought it was a good idea – it is sho’nuff an alternative to the “lock ’em up and throw away the key” method that has the prison industry booming and 45% of black women single.

21 08 2008
Muse

I had my tits grabbed by drunkards at the club. I felt violated and didn’t know what to say. The last guy who grabbed a tit, I took a handful of his testicles and asked him if he liked to play twister. There is a video on facebook of me giving lessons on how to rip a guys testicles off. Fun times.

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

chad, pineapple express was hilarious – but I think they’ll both go to hell for saying that the weed smelled like God’s vagina

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Ok question? Do men appreciate sexual harassment? I feel like they do it b.c. they wouldn’t mind it being done to them.

But I also I have a vengeful streak in me and i feel more men should experience sexual harassment and then maybe if they don’t like it they would stand up to others doing it.

haha so either way i’m covered to do what it is i wanna do anyway.

21 08 2008
Knatural

In the movie I saw, the man-clit whorebitch was receiving cunnilingus and the guy actually commented that it looked like a baby’s d*ck. It really looked like a baby carrot.

Fuck carrots!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Sorry I have been so quiet all day, being a lawyer sometimes fucking sucks giggle berries. Thanks to the anonymous nature of the internet, however, I will admit to the fact that I have slept with a woman with an abnormally large clit. I wouldn’t say penis sized, but big enough that it stuck out. I saw it, freaked out, and refused to go down on her. Needless to say, we didn’t hook up again.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Soooo WNBT, your sex video had a link to this:

I am ruined for life now. I will forever hear my vagina speaking in that voice.

21 08 2008
TheChad

if someone grabs my ass in the club i’m at least cuppin a titti…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

hmm mebbe if i got grabbed more i wouldn’t do it. But i’m usually hella altered when i pinch ass. Or i know the person. Or its shabooty

21 08 2008
Muse

Edumucated you didn’t want to give man clit some mouth loving? LOL. My guy friend said the man clit was like a huge marble that got caught in her vagina…EWWWWW

Gosh I’m such an ass. AT this very moment some poor woman with man clit and roast beef pussy is offended.

21 08 2008
TomatoHead

Knat that guy was gay. Gay gay gay.

I’ve been sexually harassed in clubs…but only by guys I already knew except on a few rare occasions when I needed to call a bouncer on someone’s wandering hands.

I had a friend of mine (whilst he was dancing behind me) grab my boobs and then slowly work his way down and literally grab my vagina parts. I was so shocked that I just slapped his hand and giggled (was drunk…leave me be).

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Muse – a titty grab will get you a swift kick to the nutsack. I’m somehwat more lenient with ass grabs, I have no idea why. Maybe because if I saw my ass in the club, I’d be tempted to grab it too, LOL

21 08 2008
Edumucated

W.N.B.T, I was sexually harassed by an incredibly ugly fat 2520 woman who worked in my office. She would come up to me and lean over with her 50DDDDDs in my face and always comment about how she wanted to touch my hair, rub my back, and make general sexual advances toward me. It was the most awkward and uncomfortable situation in the world.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

You’d probably be too shocked to know what to do TheChad. And I’d be doing something else. ITs a booty pinch and on you way. Nonverbal nice ass and keep it moving.

Doc, i’ didnt check any link and i’m in class right now so i’m not going to go there. They just turned off the light and i don’t want my glowing laptop displaying vag.

21 08 2008
Dekela

roast beef pussy??

what the fuck is that?

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Man-Clit=Baby Carrot

*shudders*

21 08 2008
Muse

Hehehe then there is the story about Mr. Extra Cheese and Curtain dick…I will have to save that for another day.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT – even cartoon vag? LOL. Ya gotta wait for later anyway, watching it with the sound on is crucial.

21 08 2008
Muse

Dekela Roast beef/ Pastrami pussy is vagina that is very beat up, loose and looks like lunch meat. Think of a porn star who has participate din 500 gang bangs.

21 08 2008
Knatural

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHHHAHAHAHA Curtain Dick

I have to pee…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Ok repetitive sexual harassment is a no go both genders.

But one time only booty pinch? I dunno, mebbe i’m like Doc, but i think its cuz i don’t have a booty at all and i’d just be shocked if you could find enough to pinch. Happened once and shocked the hell out of me. I’m sure that man followed me around the party for an 20 minutes to find a place to pinch.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Hehehe then there is the story about Mr. Extra Cheese and Curtain dick…I will have to save that for another day.

Muse, please take your ass back to Egypt. Thanks!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Muse, I passed on the man-clit, just not really my thing. I wouldn’t say marble though, more like a pinky finger from the nail up (on a small hand).

Best club story I have, I was out with a girl I was trying to talk to and she brought her roomate, a fat white girl who wanted to tag along. Her roomate was getting no love so she decides to dance with one of the old Latino men who frequent the DC clubs. Next thing I know he had his hand over her mouth and was trying to drag her out of the club. I am sure if he didn’t see me and the girls roomate looking I would have stopped him eventually, but I just couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. Not an ass grab, not a titty grab, but a mouth cover. Mind you this was at Platinum (before I realized I should know better)

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

roast beef pussy, ewwww

21 08 2008
sarah

man, i missed the best streak of comments… 😦

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Gosh I’m such an ass. AT this very moment some poor woman with man clit and roast beef pussy is offended.

ewww roast beef lol.

I understand that labiaplasty is like the new shit now or somethin. Becoming more popular than booty implants.

http://averypublicsociologist.blogspot.com/2008/08/perfect-vagina.html

21 08 2008
TomatoHead

I do feel kinda sorry for ladies with the roast beef pussy…they can’t help that it looks like that.

I only say that because I really do not want mine to look like that after having children or something. Can that happen?

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Doc and W.N.B.T – I have had my ass grabbed in the club before by women. I think, at least for me, it isn’t really sexual harassment because I am a hetero man so my ass does not become involved in sexytime. I think a woman’s ass is much more sexual than a man’s ass (pause) in that we are thinking of what it might be like to put something in there. lol I hope when a woman grabs my ass she isn’t thinking the same.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ WNBT

Depends on the woman…no one wants sasquatch groping them, male or female.

But I believe in sharing…or as Shock G once said:

“If you touch me here I’ll touch you there”

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

damn, she was about to get dragged out of the club and ya’ll bitches were laughing. I woulda kicked you in the nuts after i kicked that salvadorean in the nuts.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

hmm all black women appreciate a nice ass. But with a guy, i never really think about putting anything anywhere except my hands. And I will rub on your booty like i can see the future in them cheeks

21 08 2008
Muse

Damn that’s fucked up. That white girl was probably about to get ass raped by ten mexicans and you negros were laughing.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

not like i’m rubbing a lamp though. Cuz i don’t want nothing coming out of there.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

salvadoreans Muse, Mexicans don’t exist in DC.
Also Ghanaians not Nigerians

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Amadeo- It was on NBC or ABC…one of those 10 pm specials

21 08 2008
ninasimone

You must have a special folder on your desktop full of pics of white women in various compromising positions and poses. Is it anal that I find it disturbing that not one pic ( except the natural hair one and Beyonce) has featured black women? Not that some of the nastier ones should be featuring black women …but Im just saying.

Did you take a pic of the scars the white girl put on your back—you know where you said you felt like a slave? I bet is framed and prominently displayed. It should be your Christmas card yearly if you did capture it on film or video.

No need to send the DNA samples 🙂

In regard to the post, I just realized I do this. It is ridiculous

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Somebody in my class just said people need to be touched. the whole class cracked up. Maturity at its best.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Muse…I usually get my ass slapped in return…usually not a problem simply because I thought you were hot to begin with, and we’re probably going to be grinding on the dance floor once I finish my drink.

I did that to the PR dude in ATL (see: dl hottie…smh), and he seemed to like it way too much…(that should have tipped me to his homo status).

But if you try to touch the cooch or a non-existant booby of mines, I will bend your fucking fingers back.

The one I hate the most is when guys start pulling in my hair at the club. I had to be carried out the club once because I was about to fight a dude (drunkenly) for fucking with my hair.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Well……………………………. I wouldn’t have let him get out of the club with her, but it was funny as shit. Now if she had been my friend and not some fat girl who happened to be roomates with my date, young would have disappeared. It all ended up ok though, she ended up finding her a nice black man who loves fat white women. Did anyone see the “Drawn Together” where they explained this phenomenon? Fucking Hillarious.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

having a woman rub on my ass is…disconcerting. it doesn’t feel “good” or get me in the mood. It’s the equivalent of a woman walking up and saying in a monotone business voice, “Shall we schedule a time for sex?”

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Knatural – Aaaaahhhhhh! Fuck Carrots! You’re a woman after my own heart.

WTF is roast beef vag? I thought my worst fear was raisin belly after kids. But now I gotta worry about her turning into some roast beef?

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

One time i was in a club and this guy gestured toward me like he was trying to say something. It was loud so I leaned over so he could say it in my ear.

He licked my cheek.

I said. He licked. My cheek!

I sho’nuff commenced to kick the ever loving shit out of him until I was escorted out of the club by security.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

W.N.B.T He also could have been Bolivian. NOVA has the largest Bolivian population in America. And you forgot Ethiopians.

21 08 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAA @ NinaSimone.
Seriously. Does Chris/SBPH have a secret cache of White Women porn on his laptop. Perv.

And I’ve never been ‘sexually harrassed’ in a club. I feel un-special. 😦

21 08 2008
Amadeo

I’ll tell you what is fun (though I wouldn’t recommend it in a club) When you hold a woman so your index finger is in the line formed between the top of her leg and the bottom of her ass cheek.

Publicly I only really like to go as far as stroking the small of a woman’s back.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yes but there’s no ethiopian counterparts in other parts of the country. Also you can’t mistake an ethiopian. I always look at anyone crazy when they ask me, how do you know he’s ethiopian. I mean, fuck, he looks ethiopian!

I have been licked, had someone pull my head scarf (had scarfed the fro) been pinched once. What i hate is that my own damn friends (FEMALE) have a tendency to play bongos on my boobs at unsuspecting moment. Damn africans with no titties!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I tried to find the Drawn Together clip. Instead I found this, possibly even better http://www.topix.com/forum/afam/TJGLJT1CQJDN9ESUE/p26

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Knat – I can make it happen for you, LOL.

Soooo…am I the only one who has gotten Russell the Love Muscle whipped out on her at a party? This was back in college – freaking sex-deprived nerds. I couldn’t even be mad, I just started laughing hysterically and ran away. What exactly did he think was going to happen next? Nigga probably went on to pen “Love in this club”

21 08 2008
Muse

Question for everyone, have you ever been with a man or woman with taco meat pubic BAHAHAHa

I really do need Jesus like ten minutes ago.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I tried to find the clip from Drawn Together where they explain that fat white women booty is like the trees that Africans used to hide from lions in and that is why black men love fat white chicks, instead I found a forum discussing “Why are black women afraid to date white men.” I wish it would let me post the link

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Am I the only one who doesn’t particularly like black folk in my porn. Well i think its more black men. but i’m always slightly scared i’m going to recognize somebody. I have (it was an accidental download on Ares I swear!) this really serious all gay porn from the eighties in some sweaty storage shed that i keep on my computer only b.c. I swear Charlie Murphy is in it. And I show it to random black folk just to see if i’m crazy or they think that it looks like Charlie Murphy too. And its like a scary 7 man orgy thingie

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Edumucated…I was trying to hit on you in the last post…lmao!!!

Look, there are a lack of Cuban men in Michigan…lol…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

no sorry, meant to say i like black men i’m scared of black women in my porn. Mebbe i know too many freaky ass chics.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

not like i’m rubbing a lamp though. Cuz i don’t want nothing coming out of there.

lmfao!!!

*dead*

21 08 2008
Muse

NO one wants to take a stab at the taco meat question? Buck shots on the pubs? Anyone? LMAO

21 08 2008
Knatural

Doc! – ewwww. He pulled it out? No. I would’ve thrown my drink on it.

Black porn always looks homemade. And they’re always ashy.

21 08 2008

I was dancing with this guy and I turned around to face him. I was facing him doing the Né 2 step. ( little sexy sway…smile then turn around) Dude gets real close and cups my breast, before he could squeeze I grabbed his hands and squeezed them really tight. I said “hey hey hey what’s wrong with you”

dude is like:

“I’m sorry I lost myself,(looking dumb)I’m so sorry”

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damnit i also forgot i got Russell pulled on me in Platinum. Had to run away but then i ran into white people so i had to go back. See the scary thing about being a woman on your own in the club. In fact, all these freaky events happened in a club. Licking was in Republic Gardens (no where to run really that fuckers is too small) Open dick was Platinum, Scarf pulling was by an otherwise sexy latino (my first and only so sad) in a booty little club in richmond. beware the club.

21 08 2008
Knatural

drank*

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Sorry Muse, as I’ve mentioned in other posts I’m a believer in fuzz-free trouser snakes. Besides that would mean he probably has taco meat somewhere else on his body (like chest) and after seeing that, we would’ve never got down to his giggle berries to begin with.

21 08 2008

I don’t like black porn either, it’s always homeade and dusty. For me to enjoy porn the people have to be good looking and sexy

21 08 2008
Edumucated

C.D. I must have missed it. But if you want to come to DC and grab my ass in the club, I will allow it. We can go somewhere really hood like Mirrors or The Legend. W.N.B.T what do you know about THAT?

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

ohhh, Muse you got me on that one. I was just thinking earlier when I went to the restroom how it never fails to see somebodys Fucking pubes on the toilet seat. lol

oh yeah whats up w the taco meat?

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

My CI has buckshot pubes. Damn seapeople. I had them removed.

Mr. dick-out smelled outrageously good, was tall and pretty sexy. Probably had some temporary insanity in the reggae room with him but not that damn insane.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

smh @ muse…

…in other news…wth is up with guys waxing/shaving their nether regions?

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-weird-guy-trend-total-manscaping/

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

I probably would have cracked up at “I Lost myself” for the sheer stupidity of the explanation.

I’ve had my ass bitten.

Pause.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

*grins*

(in a hoodrat voice) Boy, whatchu look like?

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I don’t shave or wax but I keep myself well trimmed.

21 08 2008
Muse

That’s why I refuse to use public bathrooms. I don’t need anything else to compromise my innocence.

Speaking of bathrooms there is a Sr. Analyst that I work with. Every morning at 10am she goes to the bathroom to take a huge dump. The bitch literally blows the bathroom up and doesn’t give a fuck. One time washing my hands and I heard this broad drop a few elephants into the toliet and of course she didn’t wash her hands. In fact she came out of the bathroom after five seconds, smiled at me and walked out the god damn door without touching water.

21 08 2008
Muse

Oh and her bowel movements smell like a damn Concentration camp.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Been to the legend. Multiple times for live acts by elephant man and rupee was supposed to show up. Was too intimidated to dance properly. Cuz those seawomen were breaking it down. Thats where i got hit on by my second latino but he was ittybitty and looked 16 even with his wristband. Plus he was trying to get me to go to his car and fuck and i was just trying to get a drink. Neither of us got what we wanted.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

I don’t know about waxing but a trim keeps a dude aerodynamic when it comes to making sexy time. Plus I associate more hair with more funk.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Oh yeah, I couldn’t let this pass…

WNBT likes gay Charlie Murphy porn!!
*Dude stares longingly into his funhole…”DARKNESS!”*

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Muse lol.

I look like DAAAAARKNESSSSSSSSSS lol.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

EWWWWWWWW muse, we WERE talking about rubbing up on Amadeo’s ass inna da club you know.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I mean Edumacated. Sorry boys

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

I keep trying to tell you guys, the less hair for all involved the better. No one likes gagging on a short and curly.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

BenAfficial and Edumacated, please tell your friends to do the same. Nothing worse than a fucking forrest of hellthefuckno down in your pants.

I went to the Legend one time and a discount Slick Rick (eyepatch and all) wouldn’t leave me be.

Never went back.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

wow. That was terrible timing. Fuck you doc

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

EWWW EDUMACATED. I seen you and like 7 dudes!!! I swear Doc I’m going to send that video to you now. Just to burn it into you retinas

21 08 2008
eysqueen

and here i thought there was something wrong with EVERYONE’s computer. I was like “why is everyone cussing funny?” Thanks for clearing that up for me!

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

I’m officially blocking Muse from my life.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ WNBT…HE’S MINE!!!

lol…you can have Godzilla…lol.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Gargamelling Doc. Gargamelling

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

diva don’t you already have a timeshare on Landon. With his single buckshot self.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

LMAAAOOOOOOO!!! Sorry Edumacated!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

W.N.B.T That sounds more like Crossroads than The Legend. Mirrors, however, is almost as ridiculous as the guys in Adams Morgan who think they will get some play by saying “Hey girl, you in the yella, come here shawty.” The DC Tunnel/Palladium/Envy or whatever the fuck it is called today is another interested spot.

21 08 2008
sarah

Doc, i went to a Que party once (note, once) and me and sorors were dancing and all of a sudden, i could swear i smelled dick. so, i say real loud, “you smell dick!” everyone laughed, and then scattered lick roaches cause a half naked Que ran up on me from behind with his third leg coming at me. i was traumatized. apparently he wasn’t, nor was a Que Pearl cause they attempted to have sex in the middle of the dance floor.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Yeah Sarah, it was a Que that did the ass biting.

Gotta love “Da Bruhs”.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ WNTB…not fair!!! I have to share Landon with Ne…and he’s the only other Cuban and I’m now sad.

*sobs*

21 08 2008
Muse

::In country accent::

Doc I can’t quit you.

Don’t block me. I might actually end up doing trini for carnival though. The Brazilians are trying to charge me a shit loud of money for some 4 instead of 5 star hotel accomodations. Bitches.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

You know what, you right, i meant crossroads. Damnit! I been to the legend only once. Nothing to report back. Almost went to the tunnel but when we rode by the place we were like damn. we gonna get shot and raped up in here just trying to get to the door. lets go to crossroads

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Fine diva, if you’re going to pout. Besides I wouldn’t want to share with you anyway if you’re going to come back smelling like landon’s single nappy pube. :p.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

CD + the Ques = near-death experiences.

I hate when they stroll at parties…one minute I’ll be standing there to the side of the dance floor to avoid getting trampled for me to only get jumped on with their wildness the next.

To say the least, everytime I see purple and gold, I run.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Come one Muse, you know ya wanna! I ordered my costume yesterday (Knat, I meant to tell you, I got into Tribe!). I am too excited, Carnival seems exactly like my kinda scene – where I can hump and wine and grind on dudes and nobody blinks an eye.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Dudes who bark act like dogs

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

still dead off Roast Beef pussy…

I’ll never look at an Arby’s Big Beef and Cheddar the same way again.. =/

21 08 2008
BK24/7

@ Muse…

2520’s hardly ever wash their hands after using the bathroom. At least it was your co-worker. At my last job, my boss and I were on the same shit schedule. It’s embarrassing coming out the stall and looking at your boss every morning after we both took dumps.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

My co-worker used to call it “Dropping kids off at the pool”

lovely

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

LMAO, Sarah, you should’ve known better. I’m sorry, Que parties are ridiculously homo-erotic. Yeah, I get they’re just supposed to be hopping around and having fun…but there is just too much male peen and tongue in close quarters while the women are off cowering in the corners.

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

@ 8th Wonder

was your ass perchance bitten by a Que? they love to do that shit. that’s why every thirsty broad in college was WAITING for the annual QPsiPhi throwdown…

21 08 2008
Muse

Wow doc you move fast. Which company did you order your costume from?

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Taking the Browns to the Super Bowl, lol

21 08 2008
Edumucated

The Tunnel is a mess. We used to go before I left for college and I don’t know if it still is, but it used to be the only spot open until 5am. Mirrors is the spot near Fur but on NY Ave if you are heading out towards Fl Ave, extra hood. I went to Layla Lounge last week on Florida and despite being a WPGC event, it is actually really nice.

As far as the Ques are concerned, there but for the grace of God go I. I am too old to be representing my fraternity like that anymore, but lets just say I am way too pretty to be a Que.

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

k… i guess i’m late…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Doc repost that link you were talking about earlier. Class is over

21 08 2008
BK24/7

@ Ben

I gotta use that one!

21 08 2008
Muse

Edumacation do you have facebook? You don’t exist unless you have facebook LMAO

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Blackberry, yes it was a Que. They make me chuckle.

@ Edumacated, I’m being nosey, but how old are you? I always ask when I hear people say they are “too old” in regards to something with thier org.
And I went to Layla Lounge on Wednesday for the happy hour…it was good times. I hear it pops off on Saturdays as well.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I went to Mirrors once too now i remember. Ye gods that was boring as fuck. I went with a guy friend and older female friend between us attracted to the 2 old guys in the club. And i got stuck with dirty old african guy. fugck (yes the g is supposed to be there, thats how i’m pronouncing it, with the extra vomit sound in the middle). It was fulla some bitchassness too with dudes trying to holla after the night is through even though i been making my self available and giving out looks.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I refuse to fall into the temptations of Facebook, plus I am too old for that as well. No grown men need to be on Facebook, I don’t need college freshmen trying to get in my pants.

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Muse – U need to tell that woman about herself. Or start keeping some matches. If ur women’s bathroom jumps off like that, I can’t imagine the men’s room. SMH

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Edumacation, we will assume that you are a 47 year old chester until you identify yourself on the SBPH facebook discussion “Who Are You.”

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I am 27. I was just kidding about being too old to represent my org. I actually still do a lot of work for my chapter (even though I am not right there). I am just way beyond the representing like a Neo. If someone was to ask me if I was a member of said org, I would say absolutely, however, I don’t feel the need to just shout it out anymore. 7 years in the game will do that to you.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8thD74s-OYI&feature=related

Muse: Dang you and your last minute flip-flopping butt! I’m going to be playing mas (aw, look at me using the lingo…hot shit) with Tribe (www.carnivaltribe.com). They’re already sold out though! 😦
Although I hear people can often still find costumes later since some people end up not being able to go and sell their spots. Or I have recommendations on other good bands.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Edumucated…damn, how’d you guess I was a freshie? lol.
(but do you have a photo online? I’m not supposed to be talking to Ques, but if you’re cute, I can let that slide)

Ok, new post at DSL

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

doc, knat, and muse are ya’ll friends in real life? i wanna go to Trini for carnival. I’ve been to Brazil’s before. It was sho’nuff outta control. Speaking of real life friends, what ever happened to Dustin?

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

ROTFLMBAO @ 27 is too old for Facebook!

21 08 2008
sarah

BK24/7, while in undergrad at a PWI, i had a YT friend who told me, in all boldness, that she never washes her hands in public restrooms cause she feels its more unsanitary. she, an education major, was saying this to me, a chemistry major. she stayed sick. we aren’t cool anymore.

BenAfficial, at this same school, i was friends with some lesbians, and i asked what its like to eat pussy. she says, “it tastes and looks a bit like roast beef.” i asked, “with au jus or no?”

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I don’t even know what a chester is, but I assume its bad lol. I am ok with people assuming I am something or another. Unless you want me to get mad and go through a ridiculous amount of work to prove that I am in fact me and not someone else. This would be, of course, for entertainment purposes only.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

I don’t want hot or warm wax near Godzilla. No likey.

I got the store for a minute shit hits the fan in here.

I just remembered! I was at a Meshelle N’degeocello show at 9:30 last summer and these gay girls infront of me were doing their thing all night. At one point one of them bends over to take off her shoes and I swear her ass crack was right on my arm. I could have let it go, but she bent over like twice more and did the exact same thing. I was mostly confused…I know lesbians are more likely to cross back over…but really…your ass crack on my arm?!?!?! I was actually more disgusted than anything.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Edumacated, I feel you, I’m not 7 years in yet, but I don’t need to sing it from the rooftops in triple pari either. Though that was fun while it lasted, lol.

27…man, get out your walker and ensure, that hill’s a coming.

I’m acting like I’m not 25.

21 08 2008
riz

O

M

G

I’m sitting here, tipsy at an airport bar, lmbao by myself. Ya’ll nig nogs make me look insane to Others.but how I missed you.

BTW, I self censor bc I like to hold out the curse words for when I *really* mean them!

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Sarah- Au jus?

I hate you.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Wow! I just HAD to take lunch at the height of the discussion didn’t I? I missed man-clits and curtain dicks? Damn food. Ah well, it was good, and I’m glad that hilarious convo is preserved.

Back to business:

“BenAfficial, at this same school, i was friends with some lesbians, and i asked what its like to eat pussy. she says, “it tastes and looks a bit like roast beef.” i asked, “with au jus or no?””

HAHAHAHAHA! Poon au jus.

21 08 2008
Muse

Damn doc they are sold out. My friend used the same company last year. OMG I would have to run and work out hardcore to feel comfortable in those costumes!

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ edumucated…Chester, as in Chester the Molester.

Looks something like this:

21 08 2008
Edumucated

C.D – My picture is online in various places, but that is privileged information lol. I am most certainly not a que though. I said I am too pretty to be a dog, that should be hint enough. 27 is too damn old for Facebook. If it didn’t exist when I was an undergrad, than I am too old for it.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damn I wanna go to Trinidad this year. Just to see Doc. I know you gonna put pics up when you get your costume. Mebbe my roommate will take me.

Doc, i just saw that video and i think i reneg. I don’t want to see your crazy ass at jumpup

21 08 2008
Muse

Doc which costume did you end up gettnig? I didn’t see mas on there.

21 08 2008
TheChad

I knew it was coming…. every club convo turns to “tales from the que-party”…. i think i’ll just listen this time cuz i don’t want a repeat of the last one…

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Ed and 8th – thanks for the recommendation, I’ve been wondering how Layla is. About what size is it? I’ve missed the pass couple events there since school has been hectic. I plan on showing out next weekend though.

21 08 2008
Knatural

Doc – Oh good, you got into Tribe! Excellent. I’m actually leaving to go to Trinidad & Tobago tomorrow morning. I’ll probably be offline for the next two weeks.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Facebook is creeping up the ranks. Technically i’m too old but it got me. When is carnival this year, i gotta check out my schedule now. Esp. cuz i’m not going to be able to afford to make my pilgrimage this year.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

And yes, I do know that now that I said I don’t give my picture out freely, gives me just enough time to go find a picture of Morris Chestnut and try and pass it off as me lol. But no, I just don’t do myspace or facebook or any of that nonsense. I wouldn’t even be typing on here, but it keeps me entertained while I try and fight the man by not working on these lawsuits.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Edumucated…aww..do I have to hack your harddrive to get them? lol…

Figures you would be a kappa though…(shuts her mouth)

…I love my triplets..I do. Thats all I’m going to say.

But yea, I want to go to cropover…I have a cousin that lives down in Barbados, as well as a couple of friends from down there, so if I ever go, I’m couch crashing! But yea, I would wear one of those outfits…

Maybe I’ll hit Caribana next year…after all, I can just drive there…

21 08 2008
Knatural

Carnival is the week before Ash Wednesday each year. But in reality, it’s a year long ordeal. All music, parties, and such all culminate at Carnival.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

*wondering if I know Edumacated*…
The black professional world in DC is big, but not that big, especially among Greeks and we’re like the same age…hmmmmmmm

21 08 2008
BK24/7

Damn, Edumucated. Maybe being 27 you can say that. If my old ass said that, then I wouldn’t be doing half of the things I do now! Shit, when I was in college, the internet was around but the web really wasn’t. Anyone remember Mosaic?

21 08 2008
TheChad

@edumacated – you get too old to do certain things waaaay before 27 dude… i’m only 23 but after 4 years in the frat you gotta put the foolishness down…

and whats this about being too pretty to be a dog!…. let’s not go down that road nupe…

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Layla is really nice Doc. the location is kind of odd, but the decor is beautiful and you can not beat free food and open bar on Wednesdays. I didn’t stay to see what the crowd was like when all of the WPGC people get there, but it was pretty crowded for Happy Hour. The bartender told me the upstairs isn’t as nice as the downstairs but I didn’t actually see it. The whole place is maybe the size of Eyebar, except more of an L shape and not straight back.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

[Rodney King] Why can’t we all just get along??? [/Rodney King]

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Ahh, calm down 1911.

@ Doc, Layla is small but not small, if that makes sense. There are two levels, usually when I’ve been there, they don’t open up level 2 and you still don’t feel crowded or pressed against folks. Its just big ENOUGH in my opinion.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Muse – Golden Dove. Far from my first choice, but I’m pleased, I like the color. All the people who previously played with Tribe got to register first and most of the costumes sold out then. The rest of us had to fight for scraps yesterday, when they opened the online registration it sold out in nine minutes!

Since I was one of the facebook originals (yes back when it was only ONE school :-p), I feel I can rep it until I’m a grandma.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

It is possible Doc, there are even less Professional Black Lawyers lol. I didn’t do my undergrad in the DC area though, so I am a little less involved up here.

Go Blue Devils! *Ahem, so much for not representing”

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

I have been upstairs at Layla…its hupe open space with a few white couches…everything up there is white and they have neon lights and such. I would be happier downstairs if I ever went there and it was open.

21 08 2008
TheChad

p.s. – i’m thinking of possible new year’s spots and DC is on my list since i’ve never spent any time there? is it a good new year’s vibe or should i wait until another time of year…

it seems to be good number of posters here from the area…

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I been to cropover. Tis fun. though. If you are in school do a summer abroad through VCU. They go to study the ‘people and the culture’ of the caribbean. Its great. the professor specifically takes you to Cohobblepot and the Calypso finals and then drops people off at jumpup but the next day you have to make it to the boat cruise by 9am. And you get Kadooment day off.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Sarah, that’s why I hate (most) auxies, fucking groupies…there is a QueFest coming up here in Wisconsin and I was telling my soror that I was scared to see random acts of cooning, fucking, and down low-dem…i’m nervous

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Shit. I have nothing to do for NYE. Fuckery.

…maybe I’ll take the train to Chicago.

21 08 2008
sarah

Edumucated = Edumukated?

21 08 2008
TheChad

edumacated: you went to duke too? ya know technically we should not be able to co-exist on one website… this is great example of the strides brothers have made in an effort to unite… we should tell this story forever and the annual crip/blood picnic in LA…

go Heels!

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ TheChad

New Years in DC is cool, but be prepared to spend MAD money for no good reason at all. Entry alone will cost you. I’d rather be at a good house party, myself.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ wntb…where do you get more info on that? (I got like a year left, but I’m down…lol)

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Now I feel old.

Luckily my distinguished balls make up for it.

21 08 2008
Muse

Oh the Golden Dove is pretty. I liked the Blue Tanager.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

DC NYE is alright, just make sure you know which clubs are going to have a nice crowd and which ones will be full of thuggery. lol

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Amadeo, I really don’t like bursting into laughter in the quiet ass office.

Now apologize to me.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I went to a Que house party one time, and to say the least, It was like walking into a big brown orgy with fugly females. Then again, it was U of M, where all the girls are fugly.

21 08 2008
Muse

OMG…

http://www.GayThugDating.com

I hate life.

21 08 2008
sarah

down low-dem… ha!

TheChad, DC is whack for NYE parties. yes i am from DC, but on the real… its not all that. its usually the same ole clubs, except they charge twice, at least, for admission to see the same ole faces. LAME!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

http://www.vcu.edu/oie/eao_ss/2008/barbados.html

I took like a whole minor in Dr. Moitt. He’s a cool prof but he actually teaches. but he makes sure the major schoolwork for the trip (1 paper) is due like the 1st day you get down there so you don’t really have to worry about a lot of studying stuff and can get on with the “culture”

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Chad, well I used to live on East Coast Critics are Biased, but I had to move because he hasn’t written anything new and people actually talk on here. Its like a nice dysfunctional little family.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ muse, why do you see his ash and deodorant? Ay!

@ Amadeo..I hope I’m not making you feel old. Besides I’m on the 5 1/2 year plan…if I don’t switch majors/schools again.

21 08 2008

DEE-STUR-ING!

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

I’ll be NYE’vin it in DC. what’s up with those party cruises? Are they worth the 2oo clams?

21 08 2008
TheChad

well welcome to the family old man… are you originally from NC or did you just go to school at Duke?

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Thats why I traded Amadeo for Educmacated. The distinguished salt and pepper nuts

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ wnbt…thanks! I’ll look into that. I have like 30 credits of electives to fill…

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

DEAD At WNBT

21 08 2008
sarah

Chaotic Diva, fugly is one of my favorite words! me and my BFF do word shipping cause she thinks faster than she can talk, so we have words like fugly (fucking ugly), basty (big and nasty), and eyebrall. but yes, Ques and fugly chicks go together like chips and dip.

8th Wonder, co-sign on a good NYE house party.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Jess – sorry, so many sorority chicks are just as whorish as those in auxiliaries.

Co-sign what everyone said about DC being real EXTRA on NYE.

Thanks for the info about Layla everyone. Is that where Touch Saturdays moved to? Or is that another spot? I can’t keep with all the promoters in DC!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Its worth the $3000 for 3 weeks. Esp. if you can get funding for it. And the dorms are pretty nice for dorms. You get your own room. Watch out for the wildlife though. Bats, cats, st. lucians, birds

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Ques and fugly chicks go together like chips and dip.

*dead*

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

hey edumacated… Indiana Love over here

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I am born and raised in Chocolate City. How the fuck I made it from Ballou to Duke is a question I will never be able to answer. W.N.B.T I appreciate being traded up for, however, I feel like my say in this conversation is limited. I don’t think anyone even asked if I was single. I have just been claimed lol.

21 08 2008
TheChad

ATL it is then….

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

St. Lucians? lmao!!!

St. Lucians are cool in my book. Jamaicans on the other hand…they always want to give me a hard time b/c I’m from the states…but its like dude…half of my fam is Jamaican (I’m not though…they’re somehow in the fam in ways I don’t know or understand).

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

N/M, I looked it up.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Shoot who is having a houseparty on NYE. Every NYE I end up in my apartment eating chips and playing video games with my friend. Well since the NYE I gave up drinking

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

TheChad, ATL isnt much better, take it from experience.

Different big city, same extra-ness, but with more snaps, spins and twists.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Edumucated…would you like to have a nice cute Cuban girl, or do you want WNBT, who’s alright…

21 08 2008
Ethel

“Russell the Love Muscle and The Giggle Berries Adventures in TwatWaffle.”

That’s only dirty if you bring in the characters from Veggie Tales.

And speaking of food, does it fool anyone when they [those editor people] re-dub a swear word with another word/phrase that no one would ever say? For example:

You stupid FRUIT! [probably Casino but maybe Good Fellas].
ForGET YOU! [anything w/ Al Pacino, Joe Pesci, etc.]
GOSH Damn hippies! [Oceans 11]

Isn’t the ‘view discretion’ banner at the commercial break a good enough head’s up?

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Doc:
I agree, but I haven’t seen it the other way around…then again…*ahem*…SPR2K7 right here…lol

Ah..edumakated! You know what they say, “Pretty IS as Pretty DOES”

😉

21 08 2008
Shay-D-Lady

ummm the point of using asteriks and creative spelling was, i thought, because most of us are at work and wanted to avoid getting sites like this banned by the office firewall, not for the other reasons given in this blog….

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ 8th…yea, the snaps and spins come from all the dl debauchery. Any straight man going to the club in ATL I’m sure is guaranteed to get at least 3 girls that night.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

man i give jamaicans hard times for not being from the states. yes i did it in jamaica. Don’t give me no pidgen attitude like you better than someone else. but i say st. lucian b.c. my (first) barbados stalker was st. lucian. they’re really close to St. lucia you can take a ferry.

21 08 2008
aceklub

@ Doc
Touch Saturdays got moved to Republic Gardens on U St. I think.

Layla is a nice spot inside but in the most random of places in DC…basically the farmer/meat market area and like 5 blocks from the Trinidad neighborhood. I was only there for the first night it opened so can’t comment on the usual crowd at that spot.

21 08 2008
BK24/7

Most NYE parties are wack. The best one I’ve been to in ’96 or ’97, my boys somehow got Jigga to perform in Springfield, MA. All I remember was being mad that my boys were standing on the stage with him and I was harassing strange women. I followed this girl around yelling “Parasuco” cuz this girl really thought she was hot shit with her cheap ass t-shirt!

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

***Correction: I haven’t see it TOO MUCH, the other way around***

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

***Correction: I haven’t seen it TOO MUCH, the other way around***

21 08 2008
sarah

blackberry molasses, Eee-Yip soRhor

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

I havent done Republic Gardens yet. Any good reviews, people?

21 08 2008
TheChad

parhaps i’ll just go to charlotte… i stayed in raleigh last year and it was hella fun but i wanted to switch cities… or maybe i’ll throw a party myself…

no fugly chicks i promise…

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

ME PHI ME!!!!

lol.

21 08 2008
Dustin

I was serious! Where are the fucking naked pics of Chris?!?!?!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I did not realize how many Greeks are on this server. I think its because we need to multitask at all times. As much as I can multitask, I am now lost between work, trying to figure out which girl is claiming me at this moment in time, carnival, New Years Eve, and pretty girls, and the rest of the Greeks.

21 08 2008
shabooty

try pinching yucko the clown’s ass and see if you wont have a tittie squeezed.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

This is ebooing edumacated. And in that event everyone is single until otherwise claimed. I have many a flag planted out here.

Diva, i don’t chase peen, peen chase I. Don’t get it started up in here. I already gave you edumacated. I said I’ll take Amadeo and his wise giggleberries (greyggleberries?)

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

By time I left Jamaica last year I was barganing with the locals and trading my old shit I didnt want for their goods. They really dig flip flops and tank tops over there, lol.

I’ll be hittin up Old Navy before I leave next week, so I don’t have to spend any cash when I get there.

21 08 2008
sarah

Republic Gardens has closed and re-opened as The Republic. its actually cool. its a good place to go and dance.

why are we talking about NYE and its 90° outside??

21 08 2008
BK24/7

Republic Gardens is still open? Damn, now I really feel old. I’m sitting here thinking about all the fun I used to have when I would visit DC…..ten years ago!

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ CD and WNBT

I still have boyish charm, youthful vigor and tricks for every year…so I’m cool.

Sho’nuff.

Hmmm…I wonder if I can get away with yelling Sho’nuffs catch phrases during sex?

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Ethel – “And speaking of food, does it fool anyone when they [those editor people] re-dub a swear word with another word/phrase that no one would ever say? For example:

You stupid FRUIT! [probably Casino but maybe Good Fellas].
ForGET YOU! [anything w/ Al Pacino, Joe Pesci, etc.]
GOSH Damn hippies! [Oceans 11]

Isn’t the ‘view discretion’ banner at the commercial break a good enough head’s up?”

YES!! Thank YOU. I was just watching something….was it Friday? Well it was a movie that uses “fuck” and it was two guys talking and smokin’ weed. That could mean any movie, but most likely Friday. Some Ice Cube movie…they all run together. Anyway, one of them had somethin’ and then the other was like, “FREAK you, man.” I’m sorry, FREAK you? LMAO and WTF.

Some movies (Goodfellas is a great example) should even be PUT on TV if it needs to be censored that heavily and (sometimes) creatively. I mean, I saw Goodfellas on LIFETIME once. LIFETIME, peoples.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

I am officially KUFFING edumaKated…anyone wanna step to me??? My mirror, when broken doubles as a MEAN BLADE!

LMAO!!!! 🙂

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

you aint done shit shabooty.

21 08 2008
Vanita

Hey All,
So I been super busy at work but, LMAO!! Chris, when can we officially meet? A guy with his own apt, thats CLEAN and nicely decorated, pretty funny and NOT GAY?!?! haha, but thanks for makin me laugh today. I needed it.

ugh. who wants to get drinks? seriously. Im in Chinatown DC. I dont like drinkin on my ace, but its one of those days.

21 08 2008
TheChad

“e-booing” – i like it… i HATE the word boo… but with the e in front it works… congrats diva.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

I haven’t been to “the new” Republic Gardens. That place gets closed up and reopened under new management like every 6 months it seems. I always had fun though when it was the hot Friday (I think) spot. Plus I know a few of the bouncers and bartenders so always taken care of.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I like Jin for a U Street spot, nice attractive black professional crowd. Not a lot of thuggery and not a lot of 2520s.

Republic Gardens used to be full of HU thuggery. I don’t know since it reopened. By the way, I saw a for lease sign on Platinum a few weeks ago, and now its gone. Did they finally close their classless doors?

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

see what happens when ever a man steps up in here. Even dustin got claimed by like 6 women here and he chases Chris.

21 08 2008
Vanita

@ benafficial – I know the Jamaicans like flip flops, my bf sold mine for a free glass bottom boat ride (which was WACK)

21 08 2008
Vanita

he thought it would be romantical.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Vanita,

I’ll be a K st lounge today for a free fashion show if you wanna meet up. Entry’s free till 10!

21 08 2008
BK24/7

@ Cheekie

Johnny Dangerously had the best substitutes for swears. I still call people “fargin iceholes” and “bastages”.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Jin is a good spot. I also like the Mahogany/Bohemian Gardens/Liv scene, but it can be pretty touch and go (read: empty) if there’s not a specific event being held.

21 08 2008
sarah

hey Vanita, i think me and some friends are going to The Park today. good drinks, good eye candy.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

See, I always heard Republic Gardens was for ollllld people, which is why I never went. Guess I was misinformed. A girlfriend of mine went last Saturday and had a blast, though.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Jess…your broken mirror is no match for the random broken rum bottle I have from last weeks debauchery. And I’m older than you!!!

Besides, my vote is like 13,000 x more powerful than yours!!!! (I love being a Delegate…just adds to my evil stupor).

*note* Debauchery is the word of the day.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Doc

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Empty, OMG. Hearing crickets chirping in that bitch sometimes.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

My first year of law school, Kili’s Kafe and Liv were the spots to be at. Massoud did, and I think he still does, own Republic Gardens, but last I knew Mark Barnes had some stake in the spot. For anyone who is not familiar with Mark Barnes, he is a cock sucking fuckhead piece of shit Mccain Giggle Berry.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ theChad…thank you for the congrats….

(so, I guess I’m slow…why are you congratulating me? Is it because I read?)

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

no SHO’NUFF Is the word of the day

also don’t say who’s the master during sex unless you want your woman to jump up and beat you or jump up and say I AM and catch a bullet in her teeth.

21 08 2008
B4Prez

*wonders if he actually is the only person on here not living in dc or atl*

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

8th – I hate J&K moved the Thursday night spot to K Street. I HATE K Street Lounge. Pompous douchebaggery oozes from the crevasses.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

“Bastages”. Hee.

I HATE when they censor Goodfellas, though. And not because of the random uses of “fuck”, but because of the BEST usage of Fuck. As in, “Fuck you, pay me”. People need to use that phrase daily, even when the situation has nada to do with money.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT – why come I don’t have an e-boo? *pout*

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

@ sarah Eee-yip *smiles*

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

no b.c. chad cant tell the diff between you and me diva. And I explained eboo

21 08 2008
TheChad

diva – not because u read but because u came up with “ebooing” (or am i wrong to assume you came up with it?)…

@WNBT – i think amadeo means he just wants to fuck in some chuck taylors and when it gets really good… he’ll glow.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

B4Prez: Aw, you’re not. Chicago, here. I feel like a wallflower that’s not even at the party when DC and ATL stuff comes up. I’m missin’ out like a mofo. 😦

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

well doc, do you have a flag?

Also I hate you now b.c. i went and looked at all 3 of those cartoons and i’m cracking up and not studying

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Doc, girl I hate K St too. I went once before, and while I did have an okay time, I was packed like a sardine and just never went back. But alas, a friend is in charge of this fashion show and I’m going to show support.

The Park is a fave as is Layla (but I already went on and on about that)

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ B4Prez…I’m a midwestern gal. Who happens to be in the same county with a seat as Kwame Kilpatrick and Detroit City Council.

So no. You’re not the only one.

And for the record, with my new found power, I get to go to meetings that are usually closed to the general public and I have the power to vote people in/out of office. Yay for me!

Maybe I should add Delegate in front of my name, so then in 5 years when I’m done with law school I’ll be “Delegate Chaotic Diva B.A., Esq.”

I like that.

21 08 2008
TheChad

wait… did i get you two confused… my apologies….

*awkward*

[tries to clean up] it must because you’re both equally beautilful…

..and wise…

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Well Chaotic…You are in Michigan and I am in Wisconsin…we sho nuff can get this crackin!

~debauchery~

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I hate you all because I have work to do, and instead I am being fought over and discussing the many subpar clubbing spots in DC and why Mark Barnes licks Man-clit

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Cheekie, lets hang out NYE…I may come out to Chicago to meet up with my Oats and the rest of my ppl, who all decided to leave me here lonesome. 😦

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

don’t forget the pony tail on top of the head. I gotta rubberband around here somewhere if you got the relaxer

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Trust me Cheekie;

I’m around DC but I hardly go out so I’m pretty lost up in this piece too. You know I’m old. I asked about a party cruise on NYE and got crickets.

21 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Baby EdumaKated:

That’s man-Klit for you 😉

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@cheekie and chaotic – I feel the pain. Eveyr1 is yappin’ about this hot spot, and that club and what not. Fuck it, I’ll go and get trashed at a dive by myself after work!!!

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

You don’t hate me, I’m fabulous.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Also, no one has yet to mention the hot ghetto mess known as Adams Morgan, which has somehow combined the Ghettoness and 2520 rich white college kid debauchery into one place. It is a fun place to be though.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Cheekie

Harlem Nights should never be shown on television.

Trying to count how many years since I went to Republic Gardens…but your talking to someone who once performed at State of the Union…baaaaaaaack in the day.

21 08 2008
Dustin

WNBT, I love all of y’all. However, it’s only Chris I want to catch and molest while jogging around the memorial at 5 am. Surprise, nigga!

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Edumucated…since you are now my new e-boo, I am asking politely if I can get a photo of your loveliness por favor?

Despues, los puedamos “poppin”.

lol. (sorry, I speak Gringo spanish…I learned it between Jersey and Queens…smh)

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Edumucated – Why do u hate my cousin Mark Barnes so much?

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

LMAO @ Edumacated. Welcome to the SBPH world!

WNBT – no, no flag 😦 *thinking*….I got it! *rips off panties* Will this do?
And yes, those cartoons are soooo retarded!

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Sounds good, Diva! But what is “NYE”? Yes, that’s right, I’m slow. 🙂

21 08 2008
sarah

K Street Lounge is the woooooooorst 😦
the only upside is that when celebrities come, they are like right next to you. i swear one night Lloyd Banks was making eyes at me, but he didnt have his hat on so he couldnt get it that night.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Dustin, are you from atl?

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Jess – When did you cross? It must be recent lol. 2001 was a long time ago, long enough that I don’t change my C’s to K’s anymore. I appreciate the love though.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Dustin, I almost want to fly you up to DC just so you can do that. Will you go ‘fly greyhound’ if I save up my pocket change and borrow a camera?

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ cheekie : NYE = new years eve

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ B4

Being from Bmore I’m historically required to hate, NYC, DC and whatever side of town I’m not currently on. Come to think about it, it may have been two years since I’ve been to DC.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Uh oh – see Edumacated, I was trying to stay quiet on the Greek stuff, but you went and said my year. Fall or spring? Ahh, oldheadedness, isn’t it grand?

21 08 2008
BK24/7

@ B4Prez, I’m repping NYC, so don’t feel left out when they talk about DC and ATL.

For the DC folks….have any of you ever been to any cookouts on D street, SE? My boys stopped throwing them two years ago, but man, those were good times. The hot tub, the fight projected on the wall outside…they used to put it down hard.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Well doc thats what I always use. Although I use fresh ones, not the recently worn thank you.

21 08 2008
Dustin

I live in the atx. That’s right, people in Austin use “atx.”

The only way I’ll ride the Greyhound is if “Greyhound” is Chris’ new nickname.

Actually, I may be coming up to DC for NYE (I thought only my friends and I were the ones who used “NYE”). Cyberstalking is fun, but watch for me at the first public book-signing!

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

2520’s can be ghetto too:

http://www.gigglesugar.com/1822814

21 08 2008
Dekela

Damn I leave for a meeting and all i see

Random Greek acknowledgements
DC Party Life
E-Booing
?????

B4Prez you are not the only no DC’er here, im with you in the struggle (though I did go down to DC for the AKA convention… had to make the pilgrimage)

21 08 2008
sarah

<—- laughing at e-boo arguments over edumucated

the word e-boo sucks ass

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I hate Mark Barnes because I have seen him grab a female employee by the throat. Is that enough reason to hate him or should I list some more violations I have seen him commit?

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT – but the recently worn ones have the scent of your lady lust on them. The pheromones attract the guys, LOL.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

The only way I’ll ride the Greyhound is if “Greyhound” is Chris’ new nickname.

i.died.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I noticed that my new e-boo is ignoring me.

I feel like lucy right now…lol

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Doc – Fall. I have been trying to stay quiet about the Greek thing too, but it just keeps coming up, isn’t that how it always seems to be. I am also trying to stay quiet and just let the e-boo situation sort itself out, I already realized my say in this situation isn’t valuable.

Anybody remember VIP in DC?

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

shit i declare that chris’s new nickname now be greyhound. And no one tell him why.

moved to tears

I’m going to print a picture of that that and tape it to the back of my couch when I take my couch on the subway when i move. If it can fit a bike it can fit a sofa. And i swear i wont move during rush hour.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Aww i remember VIP, VIP was my first real club.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Yeah, how did the Greek thing come up today?

And yes, I remember VIP. It was cool, but my spot was DC Live. Sigh, the times we had up in there…

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ wnbt. who’s doing the honors of posting a photo of the greyhound in the sbph group?

21 08 2008
sarah

i actually liked VIP. it felt swanky with all of the sofas and ottomans. i only went once, but it was good time.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

CD – if you are referring to me, I am not ignoring anyone, just getting lost in between trying to do work and trying to conversate.

21 08 2008
aceklub

@ edumucated
Dang Good Brother, I guess I am showing that I still have my Neo ways in me since I am referring to myself as “aceklub”… LOL . It’s all good Nupe.

Also, a DC party spot that can use a major upgrade is Pure (formerly Barnun) on U St. It is two levels, nice sized lounge space and on Fridays, they play the mid-90’s, two -step dance music that you can enjoy and they still play the radio hip-hop music on the first floor. But the crowd is definitely touch and go.
Now Saturdays is a whole different story at that spot even though I heard they changed the vibe in there.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

e-boo only works b.c. boo by itself is a horrible word and putting e in front of things is a horrible trait. but together the horribleness inverts and becomes funny.

Am I bad for thinking about how much my real life CI looks like Bruce Leroy and then making him watch the movie b.c. i wanted to see both of them at the same time.

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Edumacated

VIP…ahhh. I sometimes miss my heavy clubbing days…then I remember all of them. The one great thing about DC clubbing was getting a cross section of women from 3-4 areas.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

hey, I asked you stuff, but you overlooked me. I think it has something to do with me being a non-greek.

If it helps, I eat at greek coney islands and love lamb. 😛

Ok, I’m going to stop messing with you seriously, because I’m sure at this point you’re thinking I’m a huge creep. lol.

21 08 2008
TheChad

@8th – people started talking clubs which led to insanity at que parties and then someone said ques like ugly chicks (like i wasn’t still in the room) so i hid for a while then i came back and tried to speak up but i figured no one would care so i averted the attention to ANOTHER greek but it backfired because he just got an e-boo out of it….

*breathes*

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I just missed DC Live. I wanted to go but i had a baby face and couldn’t get in and had to wait until it got turned into VIP. Back in the daze.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

k greyhound pic posted- comment at will

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Um…you said conversate…

..its converse.

That is a HUGE pet peeve of mine…lol. I actually got kicked out of class for a week for correcting my English teacher on that. Come to think of it, I always used to get in trouble for grammar policing my English teachers.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Chad….honey.

LOL

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

where have all the brits gone? No one gets my Eddie Izzard references. I guess I’ll just be weird black american who like brit humor all by myself then.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Chad…that was me. And I didn’t say you guys liked ugly chicks. I was saying the ugly chicks gravitate towards y’all.

I was also making a terrible U of Mich joke. Obviously didn’t fly.

*looks out for Jamie Foxx*

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ aceklub

I stopped hitting up DC hard because of some fuckery at Bar Nun. An open mic night, the host (suppossedly) was cool with us, but let me and my man get bumped off the list by someone from DC. I don’t drive over 30 miles to be on last and THEN get bumped off by a regular. Fucktards.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I think conversate is funny… like E-boo and giggleberries. And I love my frat, and my lovely Greek sisters, but no more Greekness please.

21 08 2008
Cheekie

Omg…*slaps forehead*. Thanks, Diva!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

damn diva, what backwoods did you go to school that you were correcting your own English teachers? West Virginia? Mississippi? Richmond?

21 08 2008
Jen

I am a grown woman and I have never been to a New Years Eve party.

21 08 2008
sarah

Yeah, how did the Greek thing come up today?
its my fault 😦 i brought up the Que party.

edumucated, did you really type conversate?

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Jen, lucky you. You’ve missed NOTHING.

This NYE, I’ma be in the house in a wife beat, shorts and some tube socks, doing the wop to 80’s jams, watching the ball drop with a glass of Reisling.

Takethattakethattakethat.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

hey hey now wbbt w the Richmond references. Me represent. me gotem good educkation in pubic schools.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Hhhmmmm, VIP must’ve been before my DC time, I’ve never heard of it I don’t think.

Ace – wait Barnun is Pure now? I cannot keep up! Dang I had part of my birthday weekend extravapalooza there last year. Yeah, Barnun was kind of touch and go…slightly hood, but I always had fun. The stark contrast between the bottom floor and the upper level lounge always cracked me up.

Edumacated – aw, what up Sands! *okay, back to real world where no one really cares about BGLOs…ha*

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ WNBT…a suburb of Detroit. I think the only people in the school that had ever left the state for school (and subsequently were all Ivy Leaguers) were the black science professors.

Yes, at one point, in my area, there were nothing but smart, proper speaking blacks, and trashy, trailer white people. Then all the Detroit kids from Brewster moved out here because their parents got jobs at factories (which they lost about 5 years later).

And don’t talk about me living in the sticks. I am well aware of the chicken coop, the horse farm, the cornfields and the dirt road. (I wish I was exaggerating, but I’m so not).

21 08 2008
Amadeo

Conversate will never be as bad as educated people saying…. irregardless!!!

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

I’m 5’11. I went to Barnun, the lower level, and was nervous. Why the hell are the ceilings so damn low?

Smedium ass place.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea, i went to public school too. In the burbs. And then I checked out the public schooling in Richmond. And the public speaking. And the college level english 200 classes. My 10th grade English teacher would’ve had a heart attack.

21 08 2008
Jen

Irregardless, while clearly unacceptable, is actually in the dictionary. Conversate will never be there.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ amadeo!!!

Man, my English teacher couldn’t even pronounce Woolfe/Wolf (we were discussing Virginia Woolfe). It would always come out ‘woof’. I got kicked out for 2 weeks after she got mad at me for trying to teach her how to enunciate all of her consonants.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I used conversate and I pronounce genuine like the singer and not like the actual word. Yes I have a law degree, but I went to Ballou god damn it, give me a break.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yay for Smedium. Oh has anyone been to this awful spot in richmond which is just a converted motel 6 type roadie hotel banquet hall. Forgot what it was called but scared the shit out of me the whole time b.c. the floor was swaying up and down. I stayed next to the pillars the whole time just in case everything caved in. I went to H20 and had flashbacks but at least H2O is on the water and therefore has an excuse.

21 08 2008
sarah

sorry Amadeo, but the word conversate brings up bad public speaking moments including Barry Bonds and OJ.

21 08 2008
TheChad

I have a hard time with ‘V’ at the beginning of a word…. my ex used to hate it when i said “fagina”…

21 08 2008
sarah

my mother went to Ballou. that is never an excuse!

21 08 2008
Edumucated

What you guys will never be up on is the Elks Club on Good Hope Road. My grandma and her friends will be going there to get twisted in their freakum dresses.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

I cannot handle fagina.

Also, I hate when negroids say “On today”

Isn’t TODAY enough?

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Excuse me for sounding retarted, but what/where is Ballou?

And no school is worse than the school I transferred to from MSU. The week that I registered for my classes was the same week they found that girl dead in her dorms (yes, thats my school). We must love how my area is just shitty.

But the high crime rate + the amount of perpetual students who are more involved with the nearly non-existant social life (who happen to be like 40 year old greeks that are still trying to party, even though they got like 4 kids by 4 different groupies)…well, that fucks with the school as well.

And for the record, I have nothing against greeks…I wouldn’t be alive without them.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

u remember what street said awful spot was on wnbt? sounds like what used to be Armani’s on southside. A turned out Days Inn.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Ballou is a high school in the DC Public School system.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I realize how sad I am at the lack of boobage i’m toting.

*resolves to use discount on 3 more push up bras*

I love my job.

Excuse my randomness…I just feel like being there today.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Nah i’m pretty certain it wasn’t armani’s. It wasnt on the southside. It was back behind Union kinda heading north up broad street kinda way. Everyone used to go there but they had no liquor(for sale) and i swear i saw too many children. I knew I was going to see my mentee if i ever went back there and I would have to put her on blast, beat her ass and take her home. and probably to my home since her parents obviously didn’t act right

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Was your mentee the girl grinding in the video yesterday?

21 08 2008
B4Prez

@Edumucated – Talk all the shit u want, he’s not really my cuzzin.

Anyhow, enjoy everyone. I’m off to find a bar to drown my sorrows in. Is it normal for a 25–>26 yr old to get depressed around their birthday?…….Guess I’ll see what my only true friend Jack Daniels has to say about it. He truly cares…

21 08 2008
sarah

8th Wonder, i hate when people say they buy clothes “offline.” bitch, say what?!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

haha! i was just thinking about how i’m showing too much boobage today. I was walking to school trying to wait for a break in traffic and this pickup truck just stops and waves me by even though i coulda gone behind him. I was under my breath hoping he didn’t say anything nasty that would make me wanna cuss him out. I was lucky, I only had to pay with a smile. Damn boobage.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ B4Prez…your birthday cannot be as bad as my birthdays are every year.

To say the least, out of sheer depression, I usually end up chasing shots with other shots, and getting too drunk to remember where I fell asleep at.

What would I do without my friends?

21 08 2008
blackberry molasses

WNBT– I missed the Eddie Izzard refs because for the first time in weeks, i was actually trying to do what they pay me to do here… *sigh* but i love me that funny ass transvestite

21 08 2008
Edumucated

B4Prez – Its ok, I figured as much. I hate people who hate on people who don’t have proper grammar. Shit happened when I first got to college. All the little private school legacy fucks would correct shit I said in class like I wasn’t smart enough to speak.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Maybe Dabneys? Tropicana or Ivory’s I don’t know.

21 08 2008
shabooty

btw any1 kno where I can get a replica married with children: NO-MAM t-shirt?

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ wntb…are you willing to share? I’ll take that kind of charity…just not the kind from [shameless plug]Drunken Stupid Love (DSL)[/shameless plug]

21 08 2008
Randy Watson

Nigga please! He was the meanest, baddest, prettiest mo fo lo down round this town! Pay some motherfuckin respect to the master! The man who had the power of the glo! The motherfucka that was whoopin Bruce LeRoy’s ass and made him kiss his converse…Julius “Sho-Nuff” Carry, RIP man…

21 08 2008
TheChad

every bday i make it to is a holiday that i celebrate for days at a time… no holds barred, no expenses waived…

@chaotic – you’re still young… why the depressing birthdays if you don’t mind me asking?

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

LMAO @ Sarah.

I heart you, girl.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Edumucated…I don’t do it because I think any less of a person…but I’ve just done it inanely.

That also may be why my parents put me in public schools after I went at it with one of those crazies from the Catholic school. Yes, I took wood at a very young age, and the shit was not willingly.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Shabooty – Bwaaaaahaahahaha! “National Organization of Men Against Amazonian Masterhood!” Loved that show.

Here ya go dahling: http://www.80stees.com/products/Married_with_Children_No_MAAM_t-shirt.asp

Although really, I could print that shit up for you for $16.99, LOL

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

DABNEYS thats what that shady ass spot was called. Ug. Richmond had some awful spots to party. Just awful.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

Ahh, a lil wood’s good for you.

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Amadeo:
Hmmm…I wonder if I can get away with yelling Sho’nuffs catch phrases during sex?

You like dat, huh. You like dat, dontcha. Yeah…yeah…who’s the master?

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I am actually starting to think that this website is really the creation of The Man to keep us from working so they can fire all the black folk when they realize that we haven’t done anything all day. I am going to be at the office all night.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Randy….*throws panties*

@ Chad…I look 12, but I’m older than that…lol.

But yea, to say the least, I end up befriending/dating some of the most trifling people at times.

I’m leaving it at that.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

YAY! I love that man in a dress too. In fact I’m going to go home and listen to glorious. Mebbe I’ll talk like james mason all evening.

My mentee betn’ not be in any video. Didn’t watch it. Hate seeing black children doin shit like that. But I love that fatass little boy who wanted to do hoodrat stuff with his friends. Woulda beat him all day and all night.

21 08 2008
Muse

Hey guys, it’s inapprorpriate joke time!

What did Sadam Hussein and Little Miss Muffet have in common?

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
**
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

They both had Kurds in their way.

OUCH

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

AMADEO!! Okay while on that 80s tees website I found this:

http://www.80stees.com/products/Hasbro-Cobra-Commander-GI-Joe-T-shirt.asp

Maybe I just have a filthy mind, but how easily can that symbol be adapted for your…”alternate ego”

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ 8th wonder…its not cool when its coming from an elderly white lady who can’t remember her own name half the time.

*grabs rosary, repents for comment about nun*

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

Shabooty, I just searched for Married With Children on http://www.cafepress.com and it came up with a ton of stuff. Not sure if that’s what you’re looking for.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Muse, I hate you.

21 08 2008
Yonnie3k

I just saw Doc’s post on what NO MA’AM stand for (I couldn’t remember). Yeah, they had that shirt on cafepress

21 08 2008
TheChad

@ Muse – ba-dum-chi!

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

I’ll only share boobage off the right side since its bigger. And i’m going to need some booty as payment.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

I kind of brought this up earlier, but I wanted to bring it up again because I didn’t realize how many of my Choc City fam are on here. All of you need to go read the “Before Successful Black Men Became Gods…” on East Coast Critics are Biased. It isn’t my blog so I am not plugging it, but the article is funny, and talks about the overaggressive Black professional women in DC.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ wnbt…I only have a bit of hips…

…you do realize I’m like a size 00?

21 08 2008
Muse

I’m an awful person who needs to be censored in other areas lol

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Muse…I looked up to you. Now what am I supposed to think?

21 08 2008
Muse

Sorry the Kurd joke has me cracking the hell up.

Did you hear that it is twice as easy to train Iraqi fighter pilots?

You only have to teach them to take off.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

well then no trade. Size zero is unacceptable. Its not even a real size. Grow up Diva. You too can achieve puberty. Besides if i gave you even a smidgen off my right boob you’d probably get scoliosis or a hunch or something. Eat something damnit. And not just giggleberries

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Oh yes, Muse you are going to have to be censored

21 08 2008
Jen

@ WNBT, you realize there was a second news story on HoodratStuffWithMyFriends because he assaulted his grandmother for refusing to purchase him chicken, right?

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damnit now i’m hungry, i’m going home to get me a BLP. (I don’t like tomatoes, i like pickles damnit).

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

OH SHIT! no, where is the link to this child. Thats suge knights baby isn’t it?????

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

@ Edumacated, that was hilarious. And damn, yall men never vary too far from the script, huh?

I’ll have to add his blog to the regular list.

21 08 2008
sarah

Edumucated, is a chemist considered a professional, because i refuse to be lumped in with that crowd?

but, i can understand why black women in this area are overly aggressive. the ratio is not in our favor (about 4 to 1). its hard, i suppose. but my approach is prolly way too cavalier, so i cant relate.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ WNBT…I dont know why I don’t grow. I think its b/c my grandmothers are all petite…

*sobs*

Why so mean? I like brownies too (I ate a whole pan the other day)…

21 08 2008
Edumucated

w.n.b.t – I thought I was the only one who does not like tomatoes.

21 08 2008
The Doc Is In

Edumacated – that post was hilarious! I am tearing up at memories of “movie nights”. Actually, hmph, I still get a lot of that foolishness. But I guess I’ll take it as a compliment that guys still have to use “strategery” to get to my lady garden, LOL.

Muse – what are you smoking that you smuggled over here and why haven’t you offered me any?

21 08 2008
sarah

Muse, what the McCain?!

21 08 2008
Jen

Chicken wings once again at the root of Black violence

21 08 2008
Muse

Why do I have to be under the influence of drugs Doc? Maybe I’m just an asshole? hehehe.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Sarah, if you graduated from a good school and are making a good living you are a professional. The blog is very good, but he hasn’t written anything in a long time. The article he attached to the one about the movie nights and such, about the lack of eligible black men is fucking hilarious as well.

http://eastcoastcriticsarebiased.blogspot.com/2007/10/lack-of-eligible-black-men-black-women.html

21 08 2008
Edumucated

unfortunately there haven’t been any new posts on there for a while. Maybe he quit too?

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

Btw, an actual story on the news: crackhead kills his mother so she doesn’t find out about how he sold her car for $50.

Only in Detroit. I was so wrong for laughing.

I wish i still had the clip on my DVR. My family would get together at gatherings and laugh at that shit.

*grabs rosary, says 5 hail marys, repents*

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

Ya’ll do realize that Muse is in Cali, She don’t have to smuggle shit. She just reaches into her neighbors backyard.

Edumacated- high five! wait, do you like chocolate cake or ice cream?

21 08 2008
Muse

Edumacation are you an attractive Black man who is over 6’0? Does your penis make women cry out for Jesus during intimate moments?

If you said yes then there is a job I have for you.

21 08 2008
8th Wonder

LMAOMDEGTFUGFLBFUIGLMAIO

MUSE, WTF! LOL

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ Jen…I can fix that little boy.

BEAT HIS ASS.

Case closed.

21 08 2008
Edumucated

Muse – I am 5’9 lol. My penis doesn’t make women cry out for Jesus. They tell me I am Jesus (Lord I am so sorry for this one).

And W.N.B.T – I like ice cream on top of my chocolate cake

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ muse…back off, thats my e-boo… *growls*

21 08 2008
TheChad

@ muse – are you like this after 5 everyday? u seem so mellow during the daytime…

21 08 2008
Edumucated

And on that Note. I am going home for the day. Goodnight and Godbless

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

ooh that damn child. I want to punch him in is chubicular face. The problem is that boy is too big and grandma is too small. My family woulda dragged my ass outside walmart and tore me the fuck up. And they sell belts there. and this was 2 weeks after he tore up her car. Shee-it (also on purpose) I woulda stole a belt to beat him with.

21 08 2008
sarah

ugh, i don’t want to known as a professional 😦

am i missing something, or did edumucated allude to having a gf about 100 posts back?

i am off to The Park. hopefully my future husband is there and he can look past my babydoll top.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lol…am I scaring people away again?

Shit, maybe I should do something productive today before I go drinking. I was just enjoying my mini vaca away from everything without me being sick. I coughed only once today!

21 08 2008
Muse

First of all it’s 2:50 pst. I’m in LA. I’m at work everyday at 6am because as an analyst I have to be in the office prior to the market opening. If I wasn’t a douchbag I would work on Wall Street and stroll into work around 9. I have three screens at my desk so I can bullshit on here while still being a productive Negro.

I also had some food off the fat cart which was Oreo cheesecake so I’m super hyper right now. Yes my job has a fat cart. They want you working so they have a gormet cart that stops by the office at 7am, 10am, noon, 3pm, and you stay past sick they give you 30 buck expense account for dinner.

I’m only mellow after sex which I haven’t had since Jesus was killed on the cross.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

@ sarah, be sure to wear skinny jeans that are ill fitting. that should do it.

21 08 2008
willnotbetelevised

yes but if you were paying attention real life g/f don’t matter in terms of e-booing. And i dismiss edumacated once again b.c. i don’t like chocolate cake. yuck. Now for my BLP

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lol @ muse…

Sex is overrated, especially when you’re not getting any…lol.

21 08 2008
21 08 2008
Muse

Chaotic you are a fucking delusional liar lol. Sex is not overrated. The people are. Sex is awesome. Sex is God’s fruit to mankind.

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I’m not a delusional liar, I’m simply trying to make myself feel better about the lack of action.

21 08 2008
Dustin

I’m 6’0 and attractive. (Homeless and/or toothless people are always really into me for some reason.) My penis makes tons of people cry.*

I want a new job!!!

* I told you the last time I used it, he cried. Not because it hurt so much but because he said his Zoloft made him cry sporadically and uncontrollably.

I was done.

21 08 2008
Ms. Sula

Lol@ Dustin…

21 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I’m upset that I now have to behave stating that there are so many people in the group from my area that are probably lurkers who are spies for my county.

SMH. Now I have to censor myself.

21 08 2008
vitazza

Damn!!!! Justin
Chaotic…. it’s feast or famine eh???
**random** thought I Fuckin Luv Lenny Kravits (I’m listening to Love Revolution)
yum, yum

21 08 2008
Amadeo

@ WNBT

Grandma just needs a Louisville slugger and the cops to turn their heads.

21 08 2008
vitazza

bwahhh!!! Amadeo!!!

21 08 2008
Amadeo

What kept me in line in life was fear of my mother. She made certain that I was unsure of her sanity. Then when those child abuse hotlines came out I knew if I called them my grandmother, aunts and uncles would kill me. Didn’t fear cops, teachers or administrators…just what would happen if they talked to my mother.

21 08 2008
vitazza

Amadeo…..your mom was my mom but we are not siblings….lol Crapper my brothers still sit around family dinners and laugh about her SANITY and how fast she could knock a child to the floor and say don’t even get up ahhhhh….. (smiles) childhood!

21 08 2008
Amadeo

That’s not that half…at a family reunion we were warned about aunt helen and how she liked to beat kids…we were scared because she was our parents aunt and they seemed a little scared. My whole family whoops kids asses.

21 08 2008
Randy Watson

Catches bullets in his teeth? Nigga please! Let it be known that we are sho nuff forgetting the reason for existence…the glo. I once got the glo when I was sexin a lady friend of mine and the room was dark except for the light saber like glo of my mandhood piercing her womanly flesh. She woke up 4 hours later when the mattress and the box spring on top of her with my converse tied around her neck…

21 08 2008
vitazza

haha a family that whoops together stays together…it’s true…..One of my 2520 friends asked me earlier in the week why do Black folks give corporal punishment??? I said CAUSE that shit works damnit!!! She did not laugh and gave me dirty looks all day! Oh well, did I mention my luv for Lenny K…….almost home… Imma fin-nin to pinch a lil tail tnight bye yall

21 08 2008
vitazza

haha a family that whoops together stays together…it’s true…..One of my 2520 friends asked me earlier in the week why do Black folks give corporal punishment??? I said CAUSE that shit works damnit!!! She did not laugh and gave me dirty looks all day! Oh well, did I mention my luv for Lenny K…….almost home

21 08 2008
b4prez

Is any1 else celebrating ‘National Wilt Chamberlain’s Birthday’ (see: an excuse to get drunk)?

and lmao@ Randy Watson. ‘That boy good!!’

21 08 2008
Amadeo

He got talent.

21 08 2008
BenAfficial

Here’s to Wilt..may he rest in peace…

*takes a shot*

22 08 2008
shabooty

thanks DOC
yea that ish’s funny.

it’d be fun to wear that shirt with hater-blockers on.
=)

22 08 2008
shabooty

o wait i just caught myself i wrote ish
instead of shit.

does that count?
i was just being ‘hood’ though not censoring.
=)

22 08 2008
b4prez

@ben – Nice to know I’m not the obly 1 celebrating for Wilt the ‘right way’. BTW, tomoro is National Be an Angel Day…a happy hour excuse if I’ve ever heard of one!!!!

22 08 2008
chaoticdiva

I’ll take shots for wilt tonight!

22 08 2008
chaoticdiva

lmao @ feast or famine….

By the way, I watched American Psycho for the first time today. I am now deathly afraid of 2520’s.

22 08 2008
Luchi

i thought it was cuz certain websites won’t let u post when u use the actual word. or if its on a forum, they don’t want to subject other ppl to their language. iono. *shrugs* doesn’t really bother me.

22 08 2008
Randy Watson

Good and terrible, good and terrible!
Currently accepting donations, chicken bones, and or coupons to McDowells…

22 08 2008
Amadeo

@ CD

For some reason I love the scene when he is freaking out in his head because of dudes business card…the whole time I’m thinking…they all have some plain…lame ass cards.

22 08 2008
Muse

Amadeo thanks for the East Coast Critics blog link. IT’s really funny especially this particular post…

http://eastcoastcriticsarebiased.blogspot.com/2007/10/lack-of-eligible-black-men-black-women.html

22 08 2008
Jen

East Coast Critic sounds like one of those Bitter Ass Bastards that Very Smart Brothas talk about.

22 08 2008
riz

East Coast Critic = Boo-hoo, I’m a Black man and Black women didn’t like me in high school so now it is their fault that the Black family is en route to a slow extinction.

Whatever, dude. It was puberty. No one liked anyone. Rejection is a part of the process and anyone who still carries that around is not mature enough to be dating educated Black women anyway.

F*cking retarded.*

I won’t say that there are no eligible black bachelors out there, but there sure aren’t a lot, and the ones that I’ve met are just not compatible with me. I’m a unique woman, and I need a unique man. Ultimately, I’m looking for a man who is witty, professional, patient, kind, skilled in bed, has excellent taste in music, enjoys a strong drink, is emotionally and physically available and likes to dance. He should also be social and outgoing rather than arrogant.

People swear up and down that there are sooo many of these men out there, but I have yet to meet one, so if you find me a Black bachelor with all of the above-listed attributes, then you can win the debate.

* Yeah, I self-censor, because when I say “FUCK,” I mean FUCK!!!!!!!!!. Other than that, I mean f*ck (which is casual, and usually accompanied by an eyeroll, shrug, laughter, etc).

22 08 2008
Marcus

I only self-censor when I’m in the presence of my parents (well, my mom; I don’t like or respect my father enough to watch my language in front of him). Other than that, I’ve definitely got a potty mouth. I’m one of those people who will say things in the most crude possible way I can think of on purpose just because I can (so when it comes to talking about sex, I somehow manage to fit the word “cunt” in there one way or the other).

22 08 2008
aimlessfrolicking

marcus, we’re like potty mouth twins. i still don’t swear in front of my parents. i just turned 19 and i’m still awkward about it. although i have said “shit!” a couple of times, i always try to play it off. but when i’m with my friends they’re not surprised to hear me say “go suck your own dick, cuntlicker”.

22 08 2008
Choco_Gnome

well fuckity fuck fuck fuck then!

22 08 2008
riz

When I get unpleasantly surprised, (like this morning when I accidentally spilled coffee all over my pants), I find myself exclaiming, “Fuck me!”

Terrible. I know.

22 08 2008
Angry IV

Proof that China cheated in the Olympics:

http://strydehax.blogspot.com/2008/08/hack-olympics.html

22 08 2008
rai

lol!!!!! I spell fawk that way. . . shame on me.

and angry, OMG, I SAW THAT SHYT!!!!! you have GOT to be kidding me. . . like the IOC is opening a WHOLE investigation on it. lol but if they have ANY sense, they will wait until the Olympics is OVER and folks have left the chinese borders. . . they can pump fake big and bad if they want to while they are still in Beijing, bet shyt gets wreckless QUICK

22 08 2008
rai

and I used to not swear in front of my parents. . . but it has just been happening recently. . . I have had a lot to swear about. lol but I am working on fixing it because I just need to stop cursing period. lol

22 08 2008
Deviant

I dont cuss in front of my elders liek my parents, grandparents, etc. Other than that I fucking cuss all the time. if I consider you a peer and you censor yourself and/or try to censor me I end up eliminating you from the circle. I’m a grown ass man I can say whatever the fuck I please.

22 08 2008
klysha

Soooo is me saying I’m sitting here LMFAO self censorship???? Cuz I’m at work and stuff and saying I’m laughing my fucking ass off just sounds so unprofessional and unladylike….But so is laughing in your cubicle in a quiet office full of old 2520s. I’m the queen of self censorship for all the reason’s you named and because I think the whole idea of censoring yourself is so retarded that it’s funny. Anybody remember the Nickelodeon show “You can’t do that on Television?” (maybe I just dated myself) I remember segments where they bleeped out stuff (well acted like they were bleeping out stuff) that any preteen could fill in the blanks on. For some reason that cracked me up. Chris your blog is f*&%ing hilarious though. I’m going to miss the s%#t out of it when it’s gone.

22 08 2008
Amadeo

Best moment at my job:

I told a client I would hit his ass dead in his throat. Cussing and threats of violence made me happy.

22 08 2008
rai

lol!!!!!!!!!! @ “i will hit your ass dead in the throat”. lol sounds like some shyt I would say

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Amadeo:

You threatened a client?! I am a potty mouth, but I refuse to cuss at work, in class, in front of elders…but i will cuss in front of my mother-that’s where I got it.

Edumacated (wherever you are, lol): This is OLD, but I had already left when you asked: SPR2K7…and the “K” is a joke, my current man is a Kappa, so I like to kid [ending the Greek talk, before it restarts]

22 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Jess

There is a (overused) saying in my business: “Meet them where they are.”

22 08 2008
Edumucated

Jess – Its ok, I assumed you were joking, the Greek talk was just getting a little extra. I really like how almost 700 posts later the comments have gone through everything possible to end up right back at cursing.

22 08 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

My brother and I inherited our potty mouths from our dad. Even my mom curses like a sailor. I try not to curse in front of my mom, but in front of my dad, all bets are off. He’s always talking about “I failed ya’ll as a father, I shouldn’t have cursed around ya’ll so much, ya’ll don’t even sound right cursing!”

My reply is usually, “Well shit, that horse ran out the barn long ago.”

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Ahhh I see: I love negroidian threats:

“I’mma beat you naked”
“Boy, I’mma slap the Black off you!”
“Girl, I will WRECK you!” (somethiing I’ve actually said)
“I will slap you into next week”

etc.???

22 08 2008
Edumucated

I had a class in college where some Jersey Italian told the teacher to “Go Fuck yaself wid a fuckin baseball bat, huh” Of course, I wasn’t suprised though, since Italians tend to just be very light skinned niggas (in the sense they have nigga tendencies, not to be confused with black).

22 08 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

OT: Ugh, Karrine Steffans is moving here to Atlanta?! Well, we do have the CDC here to try and thwart the diseases she plans on carrying down here.

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Rev:

One of my jobs (i gotz 3) is to plan events for my school’s union and we are supposed to bring Karrine ‘Superhead’ Steffans to campus for a panel discussion on Sexploitation in Music & Videos…

**my favorite Rev. Leon Lonnie Love (from Martin) quotes “Satan, doest thou tempt me?!” and “The Lord blesses…he blesses like a Son of a Bitch!”

22 08 2008
8th Wonder

I am sleepy and bored and full and dammit.

I learned all my cursing from my mother. She’s reformed now, but man…that woman could curse a blue streak and damage your soul in the process.

22 08 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

we are supposed to bring Karrine ‘Superhead’ Steffans to campus for a panel discussion on Sexploitation in Music & Videos…

Isn’t that like bringing Mo’Nique or Aretha to a panel discussion on nutrition and exercise?

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

8th:

My paternal grandmother made it tradition to curse my little slick mouth self out EVERY sunday on the way to church

22 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Jess

Um…who thought bringing her down was a good idea? Is there a course at your school called “A dry purse and a wet pussy don’t match”?

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Rev:

We wanted someone who actually experienced it firsthand to compliment the “experts” besides she has done lectures on her experience in hip hop and the “media sex trade” at quite a few colleges…we shall see how it turns out, but we are know to have risque events for our Sexpo Series…last year we had an event called “Sex Toys 101” and we will also have an event, “I [heart} Female Orgasms”

22 08 2008
8th Wonder

I’m more worried about whether she will stay on topic, or whether she’ll start discussing how she fucked Ray-J while Method Man taped and Shaq ordered room service.

@ Jess…damn girl, not ON THE WAY, though! Unfortunate.

22 08 2008
london

cha bumbaclart… you all know jamaicans curse the best…

22 08 2008
8th Wonder

Is there a course at your school called “A dry purse and a wet pussy don’t match”?

Amadeo, corner.
————————————>

22 08 2008
letinstar

i feel alive when i use curse words…fuck is the best word ever because it can used so many ways…adjective, verb, noun…fuck can spice up any conversation…

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Amadeo:

It was actually my idea, I’m the youngest and the department, and no one else had heard of her…I go to a PWI and wanted a name that would attract our minority population…trust me it will be educational first and scandalous second…i am a little nervous tho, because I’ve seen her jap off recently when she appeared on the Michael Baisden Show…

22 08 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

“A dry purse and a wet pussy don’t match”

I thought it was “A wet pussy and a dry purse don’t match”. But any way you put it; best.fucking.saying.ever.

My grandmother on my dad’s side used to curse up a storm too. Her favorite word was “shit”. Hell, she adressed my little brother as “Little Shit” from the time he was 4 to 10. We asked her if she thought it was a bad word, and she said, “well, not really, cause if you don’t shit, you don’t live. Stop shittin’ for a few days and see how long you live!”

22 08 2008
london

and jamaica set a new 4 x 100 relay world record….
booyakasha… brrrap, brrrrap!

22 08 2008
Edumucated

Jess:

While she may attract the minority population, at a PWI I would be concerned about the image she presents for the 2520s about Black women. At least when I was in school it always seemed like it took one person to fuck things up for all of us. It didn’t matter if all the Black women had 4.0s if one of them was a stripper, to the 2520s they were all strippers (which happened). Of course, I also went to a school where the lacrosse team can rape a Black woman and get away with it.

22 08 2008
Amadeo

@ Rev

I love your grandmother. Mine didn’t cuss that much, but she could yell like no ones business. 7 blocks from home, people 2 blocks away would be like, “Ya’ll grandmother calling ya’ll.”

My grandfather had two often used sayings, “Pearl stop all that yelling.”
and “Would you do what she want so she could stop all that yelling.”

22 08 2008
Not_Shaniqua

LMMFAO
LAUGH MY MOTHA FUCKING ASS OFF

DIN-GA-LING, TITTIES (I HAPPEN TO LIKE THEM), COOCHIE, TWAT, DONG!

WHY ARE ALL MY VULGAR WORDS SEXUAL? LAUGH OUT LOUD (LOL)

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Ed:

I know what you mean, it’s a long process before we bring anyone to campus, she would be part of a panel comprised of a multitude of positions-we make sure everything we do is very diverse, there is no way in hell I’m letting the campus think Superhead=Average Black Woman!

22 08 2008
8th Wonder

the word twat makes my eye twitch.

22 08 2008
Not_Shaniqua

MY MOTHER CURSES IN REGULAR CONVERSATION, MY BF HATES IT AND THINKS WOMEN SHOULD’NT CUSRE AT ALL NOT UNLESS THEY ARE ANGRY. FUNNY THING IS IF I CUSRE SHE GIVES ME THE “I WILL FUCK YOUR ASS UP YOUR NOT OLD ENOUGH TO BE CURSING IN MY PRESENECE LOOK!”

MOST FOLK ARE REALLY TURNED OFF BY MY MOTHER LOL

22 08 2008
Edumucated

Jess:

Make sure to show the new Game/Bow Wow youtube videos where Game says that part of their bet is that Ciara sucks off everyone on his tourbus and Bow replies by saying only if he can smash Mya. I like Game’s music but the videos set us back a few years. lol

22 08 2008
8th Wonder

Bow needs to stop frontin. Fool was crying in the rain like Usher in the U Got It Bad video when Ciara left his ass.

22 08 2008
JessAKA Rabbitt

Ed:

I’m shocked, digusted, but not COMPLETELY shocked…lol

22 08 2008
Marcus

aimlessfrolicking, it’s funny because the few times I’ve cursed in front of my mom, it was the more “severe” curse words (like “motherfucker” for example), but only when I was extremely pissed about something.

When I was 15 or 16, my little brother and I came up with the “curse jar” and everytime our mom cussed, she had to pay a dollar. At the end of every month we split the profits. We cleaned up nicely.

22 08 2008
Alaia Williams

Well, I’m not saying anything else that everyone else hasn’t covered, but very funny! I hate that stupid “I’m not touching you” crap…

23 08 2008
Tea

“Ok, I’m pissed. I wanna swear, but that just wouldn’t be Christian. I’m a nice girl*, so how do I convey vulgarity without actually being vulgar.”

I self-censor when I’m being casual or joking. And I only do it with the words fuck and motherfucker, because when I let those words fly I mean it. For some reason those words seem to cut deeper considering that I don’t use them so casually, because I am a nice girl : )

23 08 2008
Janus

I LOVE IT!!!! This post was the shit…. on and popping!!!! I’m here dying at the ‘I’m not touching youuuuu’ one… hi-friggin-larious.

23 08 2008
toddyenglish

LMAO! So true. Now me, I just straight up cuss. I do it for emphasis…LOL doesn’t make me bad or immoral. I just have a potty mouth at times. lmao. excellent thread.

23 08 2008
slimjackson

600 comments later…this was a great post.lol. I was tellin somebody that blogs that get a shit-load of traffic are usually full of cuss words and non-censored rants. I read a few of those myself. The writer and comments are 2 different things. More times than not, if the writer does that, it’s so the blog doesn’t get flagged as containing inappropriate content. Fuck that shit though.lol.

But there are blogs that are great that don’t have a lot of swearing, just like this one. http://threewaystotakeit.wordpress.com And no, it’s not about taking it in the ass.

24 08 2008
ViK

I haven’t had time to read all these f%cking comments, but someone may have mentioned this – when using work computers, or an employer’s internet access on your own computer, they filter for cuss words. By writing this sh!t, I’m tricking the filter.

25 08 2008
Suzanne

Thank you for the incredible motherfucking amusing rant. Greatly enjoyed it.

25 08 2008
Laurel

Screw you all. I’m too pretty to cuss.

26 08 2008
Hillary 08

Here’s a scary fucking thought: OPhonyBama. McCain might be a curse word, but OPhonyBama is a curse on the Democrat party. Hillary is change that can win. OPhonyBama is McGovern, Dukakis, Mondale, Kerry, Gore, Carter all wrapped up in one big turd that can’t be polished. Landslide 2008 will be the result.
Hillary ’08

27 08 2008
ViK

^^^^^^^^^^^A day late and a dollar short, no?

27 01 2009
Vee

LMFAOOOOOOOO!!! FUNNY AS FUCK, CUS MY EX GF USE TO ACT LIKE THAT, & I’D BE LIKE…WHAT THEE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU! DEN SHE’D CURSE AT ME…LMAO

13 06 2009
Melli

HAAHAHHAHAAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMFAO!!!! ROTFL!! YOU’RE HILARIOUS. “I’M NOT RAPING YOU!!” HAHA

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