Thoughts for Thursday: Drank

3 07 2008

For anybody who doesn’t know, a bunch of SBPH’ers are informally getting together at The Park at Fourteenth tomorrow (July 4). Unless you get there before 10:00pm, they’re VERY picky about letting people in the door if you’re not on the list – so if you wanna be on the list, fire off an email with your list of names to:

guestlist@projectdcproductions.com

I will certainly be there (as if anyone cares), but I have no idea at what time, nor do I guarantee that I won’t be wearing a clever disguise like this one:

Figure 1: Clever Disguise

Furthermore, I hereby absolve myself of all responsibility for the following:

  • The behavior of my friends. My mild-mannered friends (e.g. Chicken Jon, Landmine, Admiral Furious et al) are apparently scared of their own damn shadows and won’t show up anywhere that Creole Beauty may be lurking. So instead I’ll be in the company of my bold, fearless, arrogant, asshole friends (Shabooty, Tom Harkin, D-Tang, Bombaclot, et al). All of these men are certifiably insane. I’m serious.
  • Forgetting my own name if you recognize me (it’s happened before)
  • Speaking/yelling to/at you in a surly Irish or Welsh accent, no matter how annoying it gets
  • Smacking of asses (if you’re a woman with a nice ass, bring it around me at your own peril)
  • Uncontrollable falling down
  • Special Note: I wash my hands of anything and everything Shabooty says, does, insinuates, or smells like

You’ve been warned.

Also, there will be no blog entry tomorrow. I’m going to celebrate Independence Day by pissing on Plymouth Rock. Or something.

-Chris

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260 responses

3 07 2008
LANDMINE!

MILD-MANNERED? CHICKEN JON? DONT YOU REMEMBER HIM PISSING OFF YOUR BALCONY IN SPITE?

3 07 2008
ishouldbeworking

Chris, I hope you and the other SBPHers have a great time tomorrow. I can’t wait to read all about the shenanigans that are bound to go down.

3 07 2008
LANDMINE!

wow chris, your gonna disguise yourself as an indian girl?

3 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“MILD-MANNERED? CHICKEN JON? DONT YOU REMEMBER HIM PISSING OFF YOUR BALCONY IN SPITE?”

True, my good friend. However, his urination, my drunk camping, and your angry hand-dance are no match for:

Tom Harkin – Real World Denver sex tape. My eyes still hurt.
Shabooty – drunkenly asking a girl to “tuck in your gunt, please.”
D-Tang – terrifying a cab driver, and tossing chairs at the Hawk & Dove
Bombaclot – placing a phone on a table full of chicks, walking away, then returning to say “ok so all yall’s numbers are in there, right?”

3 07 2008
Bassey

Who is Creole Beauty?

3 07 2008
Esquire

wow chris, your gonna disguise yourself as an indian girl?

So very wrong

3 07 2008
Landon

lol

3 07 2008
Esquire

Creole Beauty is Chris’ Biggest fan. lol

3 07 2008
stuffgirlslike

Well I like a get together myself but in what city is this taking place?

What about the Londoners who get on this forum like me and London when will we meet up in Regents Park?

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

3 07 2008
jg14

Damnit. Too bad I live in ATL. We’re going to have to have SBPH Anonymous meeting all around the country. But they will all include “drank”. Chris I think you should make appearances. Disguised as whatever and we’ll have to pick you out. Something to that effect. All I care about is drunken anger.

3 07 2008
Dom

Can’t believe you disclosed your 4th plans. I wish I was there just to see the groupies flock! I know you all will have one helluva time!

Also, pissing on Plymouth Rock would mean a trip to Boston. Maybe you can have a Sam Adams and see the Pops on the Charles while you’re in town?

3 07 2008
creativecat

Someone needs to post pictures of the insanity that is sure to happen at this event. ; )

3 07 2008
Deesigner

I will pay good money to anyone that will kick the kreyol booty’s ass if she shows up. Get it on tape though, like they did Sug’ Knight.

3 07 2008
B

Damn I’m going to conneticut

3 07 2008
ayo

what did Creole Beauty do to deserve a Suge Knight booty kickin’?

3 07 2008
Landon

just got off the phone with MUSE (she’s stalking me)… they can’t wait to see what girls get rejected by CHRIS! LOL

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

fuck..now i really really wanna go now…i gotta work out my plans tmrw to see if i can drop by for a few drinks..hopefully i wont be to saucy and fall on my ass walking up the stairs and Muse catches a pic of it and puts it on FB and the caption will be never give liquor to minors hahaha

3 07 2008
Jeresmom

Monday cannot get here soon enough. i can’t wait to read what happened

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahaha I would love to see that too Landon..btw since when did Muse turn in to a stalker????? lol

3 07 2008
Landon

when she called me last NIGHT AND I NEVER GAVE HER MY NUMBER!!!

3 07 2008
4m_no_2_dc

I think i may roll through tomorrow…. i don’t think i wanna go and deal with the bullshit @ Love…. or H20… or Ibiza….

3 07 2008
4m_no_2_dc

i think i’ll be wearing the hottest fit from the tyrone biggums couture line.

3 07 2008
puff

i’m now so officially sad i’m missing this: no pay-per-view could compare. AND i’ll be working. fuck y’all’s independence day…

i kid. but assuming this one goes well/nobody gets arrested/jailed/killed as a result of this, can we have another one when i’m back stateside? like for labour day or thanksgiving or something?

3 07 2008
Landon

Too bad i can t be in DC so i can swoop up CHRIS’ rejects…

it would be easy pickings… reparing their shattered hearts as Chris goes for some other woman….

its ok sweet heart i am on the blog to and i contribute as one of his staunch male supporters you can come back to my hotel room… its ok cry on my shoulder… there there young lady there there… now take off your clothes 🙂

3 07 2008
puff

ahahahahahahahahahaha landon, you vulture, you disgust me

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

“i think i’ll be wearing the hottest fit from the tyrone biggums couture line”.
BWHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAH

3 07 2008
Bassey

Damn. Is this a “get Chris Convention”? I thought it was just a gathering of folks to meet each other face to face.
Unless… I stepped into an inside joke and now I’ll be lobbed with “if you don’t have a sense of humor don’t read this blog!” comments. If that’s the case… then I’ll go back to invisible.

3 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Damn. Is this a “get Chris Convention”?”

Hahaha, I think at this point just about everybody’ll be ignoring me out of sheer spite and non-conformity…which definitely would make my life a lot easier 😛

3 07 2008
Landon

I am just his back up when i ever i can get down there!!! Just doing my job! CLEAN UP MAN!

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Damn, gonna stuck in ATL this weekend. I’ll raise a drank up for ya’ll though when I get shytfaced at my aunts house.

I WILL be in DC for Turkey Day though…

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Slightly off topic for those who know- What would be better for Labor Day wknd, Ocean City or VA Beach?

3 07 2008
puff

landon i’m glad to see that even on a public holiday you put in work.

3 07 2008
Landon

GOD BLESS AMERICA PUFF 🙂

3 07 2008
4m_no_2_dc

VA BEACH—> nothing!!!!!
i went to school near VA Beach…. there’s never anything to do out there, and everything will be over by 2:00 am. No lies. The may have fireworks or something, but nothing for the crowd that enjoys engaging in wine and spirits.

3 07 2008
Landon

well my people
i am out

Chris have fun this weekend (keep it wrapped up) make sure these girls dont put something in yoru drink! LMAO…

everyone else be safe… 4 of july has little meaning to black folks because we were not FREE… however we still fought for this countries independence. I hope you take time to think of our past so we can change our future… Enjoy this weekend with your family and friends 🙂

Peace Love and Nappiness

3 07 2008
Angry IV

I’ll be there to see if Creole Beauty delivers on her promises to throw drinks on all the other chicks in the facebook group.

Additionally, dude, Ocean City NOR Virginia Beach are good for Labor Day. If you’re in Atlanta, make the 11 hour drive to Miami.

3 07 2008
maya

Uhh…Landon….doubt that’s how it went down, considering Muse is on a plane…

…let’s not lie to the people, now.

3 07 2008
Merri Lee


Bassey (14:46:37) :

Who is Creole Beauty?

Read this. There’s the funny thing. After Chris block’s Creole Booty’s IP address, she posted the next day in a new post under a similar name (Chris deleted those comments) This went on for about 2 weeks after the original post ran. She’d post under a name like “Light Skinned Chick,” “Creolez Rule,” or some other crap, troll the post, Chris would have to block her and delete the comments. I guess they ran out of public computers at the nuthouse where she posts from, cuz she hasn’t posted in a minute.

3 07 2008
Landon

She called me last night… and she called me before she got on the plane…

she asked me should she get a Cheese Danish or a bluberry muffin…

i said go with teh cheese danish she ordered the bluberry muffin….

she was upset that people in fron of her packed to much and didnt put their liquids in containers under 3.5 z nor put them in pastic bags… would you like to know he hotel and suite number?

3 07 2008
puff

@ landon maybe creole beauty/genevieve upgraded her stalking abilities and got your number and was pretending to be muse….

maybe i have an overactive imagination, but those two bitches seem crazy enough to do that… $.02

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Thanks for that info ya’ll…I love Miami Beach, haven’t been in a minute, but I am trying to visit family up in the DC urrea that weekend, which is why I am considering going to either OC or VB that weekend.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

I would pay money to see Creole booty try and pour a drink on ST’s head….that would be a classic ass whooping.

It would be all over youtube!!!!

better yet it would be evennnnn more hilarious if she tried it with Ne.. now thats a bad bitch!!!! Ne can be my kebbler bodyguard for sure! 🙂

3 07 2008
Deesigner

“what did Creole Brewty do to deserve a Suge Knight booty kickin’?”

Her daddy should have pulled out.
Her mama should have drank bleach.
She woke up this morning.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

I basiclly grew up in VA beach… most of my fam lives there.. its pretty freakin boring… i would rather go to OC because there’s more night life… but I agree with Landon I would def hit Miami!!!!! Miami is my 2nd home…

3 07 2008
Landon

yall are FOUL… Straight FOUl 🙂

3 07 2008
Angry IV

@Landon – sounds like beats to me.

@Everyone – I’ll probably be out in DC tonight as well, if anyone plans on being out. I’m going to scout out a couple of locations for my bar crawl tomorrow.

3 07 2008
Angry IV

Why does everyone keep saying I’m Landon?? I SAID HIT MIAMI!!! I NEEDED STUFF FOR RAZOR BUMPS!!! WTF!

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

DEAD@ Deesigner..i ❤ you…but you gotta give it to her she got some balls to show up..but i think she’s faking like turkey bacon. No one in their right mind would go to a place where everyone in the room wanted to fuck her up. Lack of common sense I guess..Or maybe she wants to get her ass Ike’d and sue for some rent money who knows…

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

Opps i mean to say I agree with Angry not Landon 🙂

3 07 2008
Angry IV

I’m just hoping everyone here reverts back to their cro-magnon, primordial-esque selves and end up fighting her instead of taking the high road and just ignoring her.

Or you could do an Angry IV, and kill ’em with kindness.

3 07 2008
Deesigner

Since she probably DOES have balls (i cannot believe my language) she will probably not show up. I bet that she is some fat, greasy, beast from the projects.

Why am I so hateful today?

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

It’ll be a MASSACUH! (I’ve posted this before, but just to refresh ya’ll:

Oh yeah, kinda NSFW

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

That would be funny if Creole whatsherface is some sort of hideous Wildebeest lookin broad…Ya’ll better have a MASSACUH with her!

3 07 2008
shabooty

yeah, I’ll be next to Chris hoping to get hit with some pussy shrapnel.

but then again… i dunno if i want shrapnel that’s gonna make me need to stay at a VeteransAffairs hospital, inspectin my cack.

$

3 07 2008
Deesigner

@Rev, That is exactly what I think that she looks like in person.

3 07 2008

::TEAR::

I live to far to come to the event. Everyone have a shot for me!

3 07 2008
Yonnie3k

We should plan a SBPH gathering for the ATL chapter. There are enough of us. Anyone?

3 07 2008

better yet it would be evennnnn more hilarious if she tried it with Ne.. now thats a bad bitch!!!! Ne can be my ?–>kebbler <–?bodyguard for sure!

lmaooo.. THANKS.

3 07 2008
maya

Hmm…Landon…you’re exactly the type I took you for.

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

@ Yonnie:

I’m cool for an ATL meetup.

But where? You know how it is round here with all the “Who the fuck left the gate open” crowds. Naw, I ain’t bougie, hell I hang out at Scores in Decatur sometimes…anyway…

How about Luckie in Downtown by the aquarium?

Or Django or Verve on Peachtree?

I’m iffy on Atlantic Station. Strip has good food, but it’s high for no reason and filled with pretentious fucks and asshole bartenders who act like I’m invisible.

3 07 2008
B4Prez

LMAO@ ‘she called me and I never even gave her my number’.

And if the ATLiens are planning a shindig, thin the Nyers need to plan 1!!!

3 07 2008
Bailey Blues

YOU DO NOT HANG OUT AT SCORES IN DECATUR!!!! LMAO!!! You have no problem with hood spots then. My friend from high school took me there last month when I was down there. That’s my old hood.

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Scores is SKRAIGHT hood, but what can I say? Good food and nice thick ass waitresses…Can’t go wrong with that!

However, the last time I went with some friends of mine, some dude came to our table, talmbout how we didn’t donate money for his brother’s funeral, cause “you saw the picture outside!” Huh?

1) There was no damn picture, donation bucket, or flowers by the entrance like he claimed.

2) The dude was going around harassing other customers about this, and throwing out his wad of money, talmbout how “I don’t ya’ll damn money no how!” Of course, pointing out why he was begging folks for money when he said that would’ve made too much sense.

3) wait for it…wait for it…HIS DAMN “Dead” BROTHER WALKED INTO THE DAMN PLACE! Yeah, them clowns looked that much alike…

I was thinking, “And the ‘Nigga please award’ goes to…”

3 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Worst Strip Club Ever – Gainesville, FL

1.) The only brightly lit strip club I have ever seen. This place was lit up like a fucking Wal Mart.

2.) Music is provided by a jukebox that the strippers themselves have to feed a dollar into whenever the music stops

3.) C-Section scar on more than one stripper

4.) Dirty ass porn shop, nearly as large as the strip club itself, attached to the rear of the building

5.) Some dude in a cowboy hat talking to the only decent looking stripper in the entire place. He looked like an emaciated Kenny Rogers, and I’m sure he’s killed at least three people

6.) As we leave, stripper calls after me, Chicken Jon, Landmine, and Mandrew – “Hey! I didn’t get to rub on yall!”

3 07 2008
Bailey Blues

That’s Scores for you! HA!

3 07 2008

::BRIGHT IDEA::

We should have a miami shindig

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Chris,

Don’t get me started on Florida strip clubs! I used to live in the strip club capital of the East Coast, Tampa Bay. You had the good, the bad and the FUGLY all over that place.

When my lil bro graduated a few months back, we snuck into some hood club in Tampa (my dad likes this place a lot) and there were raggedy ass, bullet wound in the leg, lasagna belly-cause-she-just-had-a-baby dancers all over the place. It smelled like cigarettes, old alcohol, badussy and vinegar (possibly from the bootleg douche in the dressing room I guess)

The kicker was when a friend of ours went to a back room to get a private dance and he came back with a red spots on his t-shirt. Yep, the nasty wench somehow managed to forget to buy a tampon from her tip money.

FUCK HOLLYWOOD NIGHTS ON HOWARD AVENUE IN TAMPA!

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

^^^^^^^^EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO@ Chris’ florida strip club expereince….mannnnnn when i lived in florida my friend took me to this strip club in Orange park which happened to be called Linda’s…which if you look at my facebook you’ll see why i laugh. well anyway this joint was crazzzyyyyyyyy we went during work hours and it was packed!!!!! busted ass black and white strippers out the ass there. and the guys that went there had to be infected with the T-virus(nerd) ahahha I swear when we got back to the office i was seriously taking a bird bath in the handicap stall(the ones with sinks in it). The best strip club I went to was in Miami,,, i forget what its called but it was bomb… they had some hella sexy ladies in there the night me and my roomates went there.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

The kicker was when a friend of ours went to a back room to get a private dance and he came back with a red spots on his t-shirt. Yep, the nasty wench somehow managed to forget to buy a tampon from her tip money.

thats the nastiest shit i ever heard OMGGGGG ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww….i would slapped that bitch!

3 07 2008
puff

i’ve never been to a female strip club, but i’ve been to a male one…

my friend’s fucking kidnapped me as a birthday “present”. i was scarred for motherfucking life by this one dude called the punisher who was dressed in chaps, shaking his dick around in a suede fringed codpiece simulating fellacio on a fat white chick…. if i’d been allowed to buy alcohol (damn being under 21 in the usa, i swear…) i’d have been puking up all over the fucking place.

however, i did get a free lapdance from the most attractive dude there, so i can’t be mad 🙂 mmm….

3 07 2008
Yonnie3k

I’ve never been to Scores in Decatur – and from the description, I don’t know if I’d be rushing over there. I’ve never been to Luckie either, but I’d like to hit it up. Verve is a guaranteed good time (for me at least, it has never disappointed). I’m in St. Louis for the 4th, but we should definitely plan something.

I’m questioning all of these guys that say they’ve seen C-scars on the shoe models. I mean, the C-scar is really low and would probably be covered up by the front of the g-string. And on the FB page, someone incorrectly called the pregnant girl’s linea negra (in that atrocious prom dress) a C-scar…but hey, what do I know?

3 07 2008
Bassey

@ Merri Lee… i’m not sure whether or not I should thank you for solving the “Who is Creole Beauty?” mystery or find you and punch you in the pancreas for ruining my day.
Wow! And that’s the same chick that was threatening to throw drinks at people tomorrow night?

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

Bassey – if you’re going to the club with all of SBPH, you should thank me. If there’s a light skinned chick in the ladies room giving every chick the side eye for no reason, call the cops.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

Ok so umm what is the plan for tmrw so I can re-arrange my schedule 🙂

3 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Plan?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Women.

3 07 2008

lol

sooo who’s picking my up from the airport?

3 07 2008
Merri Lee


Né (18:12:19) :

lol

sooo who’s picking my up from the airport?

Shabooty. He’ll be driving the Oscar Mayer weinermobile. 🙂

3 07 2008
Knatural

AAAAAAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH @ Merri Lee.

I just skimmed through the Creole Chicks post/comments, that shit is beyong hilarious. Other folks’ mental instability is always fun to witness.

3 07 2008
Knatural

beyong?
better than ‘beyond’

3 07 2008
Esquire

So I guess this means no one wants to go to the Chitlin Strut with me in SC?
Damn you people

3 07 2008

Shabooty. He’ll be driving the Oscar Mayer weinermobile.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YA’LL ARE WRONG!!!!!

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

Dont hate Chris…having a plan never hurt anyone…cuz I’m mos def not scuffling thru a crowd looking for you knuckle heads 🙂

Chris’ Plan:
-Pout
-Smack random booties
-Stumble around with a black russian in hand, beer goggles in affect
-Start to see dbl and triple time to go home
-The End

3 07 2008
Esquire

Creole? You can come to the chitlin strut if you want. You can be Ms. Chitlin.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

Um i dunno if its safer to hitch hike or take a ride from Shabooty… it could be potential dangerous either way

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

Mrs. Epps, if I may

Chris’ Plan:
-Pout
-Smack random booties
-Stumble around with a black russian in hand, beer goggles in effect
-get man-ho on
-dodge bullet*s from Kreyol & Grimm

-Start to see dbl and triple time to go home
-The End

*guns are legal in DC now, right?

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

oops, asterisk after the “s” *shame*

3 07 2008
Deesigner

LMAO @ “Miss Creole Chitlin” Queen…….” Better known as “Sybil”

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

LOL@ get man-ho on bwhahaha…yea they made guns legal in D.C last week.. thats the dumbest shit ever…Guns are wackkk…if you gotta shoot a nigga then fight like a man with your fists your a bitch.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

thats should be than instead of then 🙂 carry on

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

THAT lol opps

3 07 2008
Esquire

Creole might be in there with Grimm doing thier version of 2chicks and a cup.

that was inappropriate. HAVE A GOOD HOLIDAY Y’ALL

3 07 2008
Shavonne Nicole

Just please let there be photos on Monday morning! Any stories of would-be arrests are welcome!

3 07 2008
Sister Toldja

EWWWWWWW Esquire!!!!! They should invite Somali and call it 3 Bitches and 0 Brains

I am sad that I won’t be able to make it. I am dying to see if one of the light, bright and damn near certifiable hoes comes through. Would she speak to people? Is she gonna try to be Chris’s friend/

Are people gonna stare at Chris and demand him to tell a joke or say something insightful? Will lurker gals come and pretend to not be there to meet him, and then walk up and be like ‘oh, you are so cute Chris….I mean, um, hey, what’s your name, Chris?”

What if Shabooty or Chris has a REALLY high pitched voice? Will you giggle or play it cool?

3 07 2008
Knatural

“Will lurker gals come and pretend to not be there to meet him, and then walk up and be like ‘oh, you are so cute Chris….I mean, um, hey, what’s your name, Chris?'”

Yes. Yes they will. AAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH.

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

Sister Toldja (19:08:27) :

EWWWWWWW Esquire!!!!! They should invite Somali and call it 3 Bitches and 0 Brains

*dead*

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-What if Shabooty or Chris has a REALLY high pitched voice? Will you giggle or play it cool?

hahaha I wouldnt just giggle i would make fun of them!!

3 07 2008
HeavenLeiBlu

*silently hates on alla y’all going* I live in ATL, I have to work, AND my 30th B-day is Saturday, so y’all have fun, and will someone please punch Creole Cunt in the face, and rub up on Shabooty on my behalf? Kthxbye!

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

“Will lurker gals come and pretend to not be there to meet him, and then walk up and be like ‘oh, you are so cute Chris….I mean, um, hey, what’s your name, Chris?’”

Trust. If I ever come to DC, that will that chick.

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Sister Toldja (19:08:27) :

EWWWWWWW Esquire!!!!! They should invite Somali and call it 3 Bitches and 0 Brains

BWAH!

3 07 2008
Rev Leon Lonnie Luv

Aww shit, Heavenleiblu, your in the “A” too?

Yeah, a meetup will have to be done soon.

3 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

3 bitches and O Brains…classic

3 07 2008
shabooty

haha i’ve seen the Oscar Meyer weinermobile on I-95 before.

3 07 2008
jg14

RE: ATL hate party…. I’m down. Luckie is nice… Cafe Circa is nice…. Harlem bar is the shit, nice small place. Sabor depending on the night is fun, but only for the free drinks. No hood spots. 🙂 LOL

3 07 2008
Elle

Ok dammit — this is my first post. All lurkers aren’t lurking because they’re in love with Chris. Some of us recognize our addictive personalities and recognize that once they get started posting, quite frankly our productivity level will decrease significantly — both at the office and at home. Also admittedly, you all far more entertaining than I would ever be, so I know my place.

So be nice and remember lurkers need love too.

Carry on… back to the shadows I go…

3 07 2008
Elle

ooops — you all ARE far more

see what I mean?

3 07 2008
HeavenLeiBlu

I’m definitely down for an ATL get together, but ITP, please? Now that I’m in Atlanta proper, if I’m forced outside of it, I’m likely to poke someone’s eyeball out upon arrival at my destination. Harlem Bar is cute and we could probably fill the place up ourselves, and as a non-drinker, I can appreciate the cheapness of their drinks. I hear Luckie is nice too, when it’s not hispter douchebag night ( i.e. tomorrow night!). I’ve heard nice things about Sabor, too.

Big plus if I don’t have to drive!

3 07 2008
Angry IV

When I’m not home visiting the folks like I am now, I reside in Columbus, GA. I’d definitely be down for a meeting, especially at Luckie if they play that pimp-ass chill house music while I dine on modern dishes and sip on sweet-tasting, albeit strongly alcoholic beverages.

Reverend – Let me know when you’re tryin to meet. Same with Yonnie.

3 07 2008
Angry IV

Speaking of strippers too…a while back I was at a bachelor party in which strippers were involved. Of the 5, two had flapjack tits, one had NO tits, one had fake tits, and one had perky, nice, soft, real boobies. Her only downfall? She was coked up, as evidenced by the raw marks around her nostrils (must’ve been rubbing her nose too much).

It was a bad time. C-Section scars on two…damn.

3 07 2008
Angry IV

Oh and LOL @ “Who Left The Gate Open” crowds hahaha.

I’ve added all of those ATL spots to my bookmarks to check out when I get back down to Georgia next week.

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

Merri Lee (19:43:46) :

“Will lurker gals come and pretend to not be there to meet him, and then walk up and be like ‘oh, you are so cute Chris….I mean, um, hey, what’s your name, Chris?’”

Trust. If I ever come to DC, that will that chick.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Just noticed the typo I will be that chick. I should go up and fix those myriad of spelling/grammatical errors in my post explaining Creyol Booty, but f@ck it.

3 07 2008
ninabrown

this is sooo unfair. why didn’t i know about this get-together 6 months in advance? i def have to plan ahead. i live too far to make a road trip from vegas to d.c.

so, july 4, ’09, las vegas?

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

There should just be SBPH meetups all over next year. Just set a time in place in everyone’s city. Maybe SBPH could make $$$$ licensing official SBPH parties at clubs.

3 07 2008
Bassey

@Elle>>>>
Word.
Email me and I’ll post on your behalf.
LOL. I’ll represent the voice of the lurkers because I’m still a lurker at heart.

3 07 2008
ChaoticDiva

Aww…I can’t make it because I live in Michigan and I have to work there too…

Have fun.

I may booze out tomorrow night, but I think I have to drive to meet up with people…darn. Saturday it is.

3 07 2008
ninasimone

semi-lurker….just saw ya’lls FB page and ya’ll are some purty and handsome people 🙂

have fun

that is a very scary picture of Chris. The eyes, dude, the eyes kinda scare me.

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

ninabrown (22:06:05) :

this is sooo unfair. why didn’t i know about this get-together 6 months in advance?

The blog hasn’t even been around six months :-)~

3 07 2008
Merri Lee

/Off topic. I’m mad at Chris Rock for this shirt. The Pen? Really?

3 07 2008
Elle

@Bassey

Thanks for having my back!

I’ma stop now… they say it only takes one hit.

3 07 2008
Muse

OMG you guys are so insane…

3 07 2008
Shay-d-lady

yeah I just stepped out the darkness myself….hope you guys have fun in DC… we will pop fire crackers, barbeque chicken and drank a little C&P and have a funky good time down in the M-Town

4 07 2008
Lolo

I’m going to buy the DC paper tomorrow just in case you guys get written up. Don’t disappoint me.

4 07 2008
Muse

Lolo, I’ll try to get into a bar fight and end up in lock up just for you ; )

All I need is one drunk white girl to step on my JCs.

4 07 2008
Knatural

Lolo?

4 07 2008
ViK

Elle – I’m with you and the lurking thing. I discovered this blog about a week after it started, and have probably posted 10 times. I’m in the “other Washington” (206 stand up!) , but I hope to make it out to DC soon. Next SBPH gathering, I’ll have to swing by.

4 07 2008
4m_no_2_dc

yeah, i’m really late with the whole facebook thing… i didn’t know we could put faces with names

4 07 2008
brran1

When’s this ATL meet up taking place?

I’m gonna be here (in ATL) til the end of the month, so Leon, Angry, just lemme know when and where.

4 07 2008
imaG

I live in TEXAS BABY. AND I AINT DOIN SHIT FOR JULY 4TH. FUCK!

oh well lemme know how it goes imaG baby

http://www.anythingblack.net – keepin it real since 08

4 07 2008
Lolo

@Muse, now you know I don’t want any of you to get locked up. Well, not unless it means you take Creole Beauty there with you …

@Knatural ~ yes? It’s me and I’ll never get caught up on all the posting I missed.

4 07 2008
Janus

Mannnnn this shit aint fair… I aint even live in the US!!! Nobody don’t want to buy me a plane ticket to Washington? 4th July dont mean shit down here so I’ll be working as well…. WORKING PPL STAND UP!!! lol

@ ST – 3 women 0 brains ROFL!!!!

I agree somebody needs to lay the smackdown on that Creole Bitch…. and of course get the whole thing in a vid or pics lol. Chris plz post abt the party once you’ve recovered from your drunken ass-slapping debauchery lol

5 07 2008
Deesigner

Its Midnight in D.C., What’s going on at the Party?
Has anyone been arrested tonight?

5 07 2008
Muse

hehehehe LMAO LOL.

5 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

I got vomited on. Twice.

It was totally worth it.

5 07 2008
maya

Hilarity.

5 07 2008
Muse

I woke up this morning next to a strange woman and have bruises on my legs.

And my poor hair. I look like kunta kinte’s lost cousin

I hate myself and everyone.

5 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

so yea… i missed the damn get together…I ate a bunch of crab legs and other food…went to a house party were i totally got my pre-game on with a few shots…then i was on my way to The Park and my man’s friend called and said we need to hit up his house ASAP(he throws bomb ass parties btw) next thing i know…Im on the pool table dancing with a empty bottle of captin morgan in my left hand and an empty bottle of henny which i drank alllll by myself since i bought them i didnt even share that shit…So i wake up this morning looking like a total cavebitch trying to figure out if that was a dream or real….well it was hella real when I sat up with the biggest hangover/still drunk headache in my entire life!…I hate myself…but i had fun.

5 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Haha, I remember last night b.c. i weren’t drunk.
So how come I gotta headache?
Keepin it to myself though*. mornin’ bitches!
Fuckit goin swimmin.

*OK 1 thing: Muse told a white chick she looked like a field slave. The white woman looked a little too happy about that. look on face: Ahhh the good old days when your darky ass was a field slave. Too many bouncers around to slap that look off her face.

5 07 2008
Knatural

oh no.

5 07 2008
Sylph

Details people. Details!

Sober up so I can revel in the fun and lunacy that took place.

5 07 2008
HeavenLeiBlu

OMFG@Muse and the field slave. Shit, ain’t nobody have their phones out so they could later post this to youtube?

5 07 2008
Angry IV

I tried to make it. Really did. Al Cohol told me that my legs stopped working though, so I had to stay where I was.

I’m still drunk, and it’s nearly 5pm.

5 07 2008
Sister Toldja

Classic! Looking forward to a full recap Monday, sir.

I take it none of you ugly bitches who went were beat to death by a gorgeous Creole, so my prayers paid off.

5 07 2008
Angry IV

ST I never actually made it to the event…I was so trashed by the time I wanted to go that I physically couldn’t walk. I’ve never been that/this bad in my life.

Time to eat some leftover ribs and wallow in my self-pity…

Aside – my fiancee f*cking RULES. She took very good care of me last night and this morning. She’s a motherf*ckin’ trooper, because I was about as belligerent and obnoxious as a drunk can be.

5 07 2008
Sister Toldja

Angry, I was talking to Chris. LOL! And I can’t believe after ALL that you didn’t go!

5 07 2008
The Doc Is In (mobile)

Good morning folks! Oh, it’s almost 6pm you say?…Well how about that.

I decided to stay in last night and work on my needlepoint, but I hear my evil twin was out and into all sorts of debaucherous tomfuckery. She apologizes profusely for her vomit-related mishaps. She does NOT, however, apologize for any dance floor molestation she may have committed (let’s be real, that was fun for all).

Props to Muse for being fucking awesome! Thanks for babysitting my drunk twin and not taking advantage of her (…although, we’re still waiting on the results of the rape kit…you know, just to be sure). Seriously, Muse is my homegirl; I’m totally slipping you a glass of ice cold lemonade and some of the good parts of the pig when massa ain’t looking 😉

5 07 2008
maya

The Doc – you’re lucky that “we help each other, ’cause we know there’s no other,” ya dig? Muse was texting/calling me all night like, “What should I do?” “Call Chris and ask him to help.” Please make sure Chauncey never hears of this. Glad to hear you’re better.

5 07 2008
Knatural

Semi-random P.S.: Wearing shades to the club should be banned; add it to the dress code list.
No athletic gear, no boots, no motherfuckin’ shades. People who wear shades at night – to the club – are probably cokeheads…

5 07 2008
ChaoticDiva

@ Knatural…yo, I wore shades to the club yesterday…Only because my arrogance after a few drinks had me going…lol…

5 07 2008
Angry IV

@Knatural – saw a brother at the club last night wearing some $300 D&G shades. He should have spent the above forementioned $300 on a down payment for braces.

6 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

why am I drunk again?..i need help i thought drinking some beer would help my early on headache/ hangover which it did.. but i dont think getting another bottle was helpful either…we are having a mini party right now….

for the record it took me 10 mins to re-read and re-typed every word of this comment…My eyes are glazed over… til monday

6 07 2008
ChaoticDiva

lmao @ Mrs. Epps…I thought I was bad yesterday… I downed a total of 8 shots in 2 hours of various types of vodkas…yea, I think I molested a few bystanders in the club…lol…

I needed that. Much needed stress relief.

By the way, everybody, click my name and you will see the blog part of my site…which will be linked when I finish the site…but yea, I can be interesting at times…lol.

6 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

I hate my friends..they are bad influences right now…and im usually the bad influence…but i have found myse;lf extra drunk with my man’s friends(the guys) they keep tsking me up on drinking contests..and i never give up on shit so yea…that maybe the reason why im drunk now hahaha

is it me.. but when i listen to certain music i get even more drunk… shit just walkin up the stairs made me more drunk lastnight haha

Me drunk lastnight and now= HILARITY,BITCHASSNESS,NERDy,FLIRTY,LOUDDDDDDD,DANCER,SINGER..ect

6 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

HICCUP..

6 07 2008
ChaoticDiva

@ Mrs. Epps…most of my friends are guys, and I can drink half of them under the table. I used to do shots way too many times…I probably have cirrhosis by now…guess I need to find a job with killer health benefits.

6 07 2008
Deesigner

SOOOOOOOOO…no asses were kicked it appears…..
But did the D.O.C rape Muse? with Maya watching? while Mrs. Epps was dancing on the table drinking with strange men? And Shabooty threw up on Chris for rejecting his gay advances? Twice

Thats the story that I’m believing until you lames ‘fess up.

6 07 2008
Angry IV

Let it be known that we are soon approaching the 24-hour mark of my last drink of the 4th of July night, and I am still nauseated and have been nauseated for the last 16 or so hours.

I fucking hate alcohol.

6 07 2008
Muse

Muse was not raped nor did she rape anyone. Muse played the role of a drunkard, babysister, caring older sister, maid, vomit monitor, field slave, boob monster, and wardrope changer.

OH yeah I’m sober and I remember everything some of you dirty mother fuckers did. LOL

This weekend confirms that I secured my place in heaven.

6 07 2008
Muse

Damn right I said HEAVEN…not hell.

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“This weekend confirms that I secured my place in heaven.”

Clearly you do NOT remember everything.

Is it sad that it’s 2:15am and I’m watchin Shrek the Third? Decidedly yes.

6 07 2008
Muse

Aww I don’t even know where to begin. I’m debating what to disclose….

First and foremost I had a fucking blast! Knatural, Doc, Willnotbeteleved, I totally heart you guys. Knat and Doc I enjoyed dinner. The food was off the hook except the octopus Doc was tearing up …but she didn’t listen to me and paid for it later.

BTW. Knatural is one of my new favorite people. She tolerated my wardrobe changes and gave constructive feedback on my boobs, hair, and outfit.

Doc is on some serious CP time 2mins=2hrs for her but she is fab. I totally heart her too.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damn I thought I was sad for even being on the internets at this time of night but at least i’m not watching shrek the third. Yes muse, I’m sorry but I think you have to cancel one reservation b.c. right now you may be carrying a one in both heaven and hell. Guaranteed you did a very good job after I left. You get your cookie. But I saw you in the club. They’ll let you in downstairs too.

Shabooty got a big head.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

See also note for the club. No seafood before going out to party. Thats just a bad idea. Cuz if you’re going to vomit, you should at least not be vomiting tentacles.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

And by boobie monster Muse is not just talking about her own generous rack.

6 07 2008
Muse

WHATEVER YALL TRIPPING. I conducted myself with respect and dignity…Bahahaha

So I fell down a few times…

My feet were hurting. I was wearing 4 inch heels!

Now that I’m 100% sober my memory is back and I have to say that I did witness some disturbing/interesting behavior and most if it was not from me

-Some really short angry black guy was giving folks the stink eye the whole night. Someone needed a drink!
-I really did tell some random white girl that I was sweating like a field Negro just to mess with her and this broad actually cracked a smile.WNBT had the best WTF expression in the world.
-Doc has some very interesting dance moves and really was tearing it up most of the night.
-Doc put herself on blasts. I actually wasn’t going to say anything LOL. . But since it’s out there I have never seen so much liquid and chunks come out of a female in my life. Lord have mercy but I was very concerned and really had no idea what to do except ask/say: “OMG are you okay? Are you alive? Are you still breathing? Drink this water, please don’t pass out, Stand up, take one step at a time, no please don’t lay down on the ground, please don’t die in my freaking hotel…
-I didn’t actually go to sleep until 6:47am (that’s the time on the clock I remember before I passed the hell out from exhaustion)

6 07 2008
Muse

The only thing that actually did piss me was this one cocky Negro mofo who had the nerve to assume that I wanted his God damn phone number because I was dropping it like it was hot on him. WTF? He was like “hey ma my girl is here, but I’ll get your number later”. Um no. I just wanted to dance and having a good time. I don’t want to go home with you or your f-ing number. Assuming ass mofos. I was having fun and danced with half the damn club. I’m a pretty vocal person so if I wanted a guy’s number I would have asked for it.

6 07 2008
The Doc Is In (mobile)

Bwahahahaha!

Yo, y’all are right, I blame not the sweet, wonderful liquor, but instead the seafood. Fucking baby octopus.

Aw Muse, I’m so sorry you were worried. Sad thing is, that was a pretty chill intoxicated sickness episode for me. I was just thinking “okay, everything came out, can I go to sleep now mommy?” Nowhere even close to how wretched I felt a couple times in college where I was yelling for my roomate to check my pulse every five minutes because I was most certainly going to die that night, LOL. But yeah, not that my word will count for anything, but I’ll totally vouch for you when they’re making the heaven vs. hell decision (although I’d rather have you in hell having fun with me, lol).

Your use of the adjective “interesting” to describe my dancing frightens me. I pray to God there is no video.

Oh and lastly, since you brought it up, I do now remember you falling a couple times…and it makes me laff, sorry! LOL.

6 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

fuck i missed all the good stuff.. im sad :-(…I wanted to see Muse fall on her ass and My BESTFRIEND dance on dudes like it was 1994 hahah…I wanted to see Shabooty’s big ass head and snatch off his aviators. fucking aye…sigh…So yea lets plan the 2nd reunion!

6 07 2008
Muse

Christ I hate you damn people. I have bruises all on my legs, the back of my behind and on my thighs. My body looks like I owed Ike Turner some damn money. I think Doc beat my ass while I was sleep and I’m sticking to that story.

6 07 2008
Sister Toldja

Hilarious! Now I am sad I missed it! Next time I am in DC, I demand that all of you return and reenact the entire scene. Why isn’t Shabooty’s name in any of these stories? He didn’t do anything crazy, or did he run off with some White girls and leave y’all hanging?

Christopher, I WISH I had been watching Shrek last night instead of driving to every “cool spot” in Brooklyn only to find that they just weren’t popping last night. I wasted a cute outfit, that always hurts. But I got to drink from my new flask (a gift from Bailey, who soldified her spot on my bridesmaid team with it). That is always a blessing.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Muse and Doc have dirty palms from being in the club. And that is all i will say about that. And damnit, doc was the only one with a camera and she was the exact wrong person to have the camera. Sober people should have the camera for blackmail purposes. Muse you are really trying to get into the heaven. “Interesting” dance moves. Hah

Ok I can’t hold this in, Easter Island Statue! Still luvya you punkass! Yea, Hellboy in pale decided we weren’t cool enough to party with and missappeared all night. Or mebbe I scared him when I pinched his ass. Don’t know. Probably thought I looked creole with my afro puff.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Next time everyone’s coming to NYC. Muse you had better use your frequent flier miles when you come to court for your slumlord case in harlem and boogie down. And you’ll get to meet your infamous bourghie brother Landon if he doesn’t punk out like Angry. Damnit, don’t come until I get a camera though.

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Why the hell is everyone speaking in code?

6 07 2008
Muse

ST there are no Shabooty stories to tell. He’s seems terribly shy and hid under big ass glasses in a dark ass club the WHOLE night. He ran away from me when I tried to dance with him.

6 07 2008
Muse

Will I’m in NYC pretty often. I’ll keep you posted.

ST you were totally missed. You would have had fun. My hotel could have been your crash pad.

SBPH no one is talking in code….Bahahaha

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Chris’ Plan:
-Pout
-Smack random booties
-Stumble around with a black russian in hand, beer goggles in effect
-get man-ho on
-dodge bullet*s from Kreyol & Grimm
-Start to see dbl and triple time to go home
-The End

Surprising how much of this actually happened.

Code, what code, you aren’t cool enough to know the slang?….

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

He actually ran away from you muse? Damn, when other brothers were coming back for 2nds and 3rds. Suspect! I didn’t know that. guess it happened after I left. I didn’t see him again after the first 5 min of the night.

6 07 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHA, thanks Muse! Yeah I had fun with you fools, though I left early. Muse was sweating like a whore in church; and Doc, don’t blame infant octopus for your wild-ass behavior! MUSE PINCHED MY ASS! And grabbed on some dude, trying to force him to dance.

6 07 2008
Muse

Will,

I told myself that if a guy slaps my ass, I’m grabbing his penis. Some random guy did grab my behind while I was watchin Doc drop it like it was hot, so I returned the favor and grabbed his penis.

Then he had this grin on his face because he knew that he was packing. Damn him to hell.

6 07 2008
Muse

-Will I wanted to dance. I hate negros showing up at clubs just to stand around like some dummies. Go to a damn restaurant if that’s what you wanted to do. Believe it or not, I’m not a big fan of clubs. I have to be in the mood.

-Knat that was your ass? My apologies for the violation. In fact I apologize for any inappropriate groping.

-OMG I was so hot. by the end of the night my hair was like whoooooooooooooa and I looked like I just left a brothel.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Muse fondled my breast Knat. i know how you feel. There was all sorts of violating coming from that corner friday night.
Muse reciprocity towards men never produces the desired effect. They would prefer to be treated like sexual objects.

6 07 2008
Muse

OMG I didn’t fondle your breasts! I gave you a boob high five!

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“-Pout
-Smack random booties
-Stumble around with a black russian in hand, beer goggles in effect
-get man-ho on
-dodge bullet*s from Kreyol & Grimm
-Start to see dbl and triple time to go home
-The End”

I am a man of my word. Though there was no pouting and, much to my disappointment, Creole Booty didn’t show up. Oh well.

6 07 2008
Muse

What’s a DBL?

6 07 2008
Knatural

Oh! WNBT – She plucked mine too. Muse is bad, veddy, veddy bad.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Pouting, fronting, acting too good for people. same diff

double muse. Ahh thats what it was. boob hi-5. Well Borat I was unawares of this mode of communication. Most women have a tendency to play the bongo drums on my tatas in public. Not sure why, definitely not appreciated. I don’t know if my CI was jealous or happy but he had a weird look on his face when it happened.

6 07 2008
Muse

Knat I didn’t high five your boobs! Now yall making me sound like some perverted old man trying to feel up young women. Geez.

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Pouting, fronting, acting too good for people. same diff”

Explain 🙂

6 07 2008
Muse

OH oooooooh….

Don’t explained Will. I already know where you are going. Relax. Go to the pool. Have a hotdog…….

6 07 2008
Knatural

Yeah, Chris and his friends were…shy? They didn’t want to hang out with or speak to us, fear of cock-blockage maybe?

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Shy? Haha, you went home WAY too early.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

I’m not saying anything. Just an odd opening to the night.
Damn Muse, i’m not going to go off. Didn’t phase me. just thought to mention it since it was on the list.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

had my hotdog last night. But I’m not checking out until 3. Hmmm…..

6 07 2008
Muse

Oh Lord.

I honestly didn’t care Knat. Doc and I were focused on getting getting our drank on. (if you couldn’t tell LMAO)

There were way too many guys (and some really cute ones) to worry about a few who were acting suspect LOL. I came with the people I wanted to kick it with and had a fantastic time.

Carpe Diem man

6 07 2008
Muse

Will was even nice enough to share her man for a few dances.

(I was respectful and did just the Carlton two-step)

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yo, that club was fulla men. I wish I knew about it when I was still living in DC area and single. Sausagefest.

You know he was disappointed you did the carlton 2-step with him, since I was allowing him to dance out. You coulda danced regularly. well… as long as your palms stayed clean.

6 07 2008
Muse

Yo my palms were clean most of the night. I had my ankles to grab onto hahaha.

6 07 2008
Knatural

There were a lot of attractive TALL Black men at The Park. ST missed out LOL.

6 07 2008
Deesigner

Soooooo, let me get this straight, Chris, Shabooty, Chicken Jon, Mandrew and ‘nem were actin’ kinda stush with the SBPH E-Boos?

Say it ain’t so.

6 07 2008
Muse

Girl yes. I saw this oh so handsome cutie from Brooklyn there. He was a caramel delight and about 6’4. I danced with him several times and when he approached me again to get my digits, I was preoccupied with Doc. He smelled good too. (Omg I’m such a weirdo I know)

Okay now I should be mad but I’m not LOL.

Yes there tons of attractive guys at the club. I was surprised because I heard that in DC for everyone 1 man there are 11 women.

6 07 2008
Sister Toldja

Muse- I wasn’t worried about where I’d stay. A friend from HU passed and I have to go to the funeral tommorrow, so I needed to be fiscally responsible this weekend. You better hit me next time you get to NYC as well! All y’all come! We can act the complete fool. I don’t get to do that as much as I wished. Ironically, I live in the ‘naked city’ but I was way more debaucherous when I lived in DC.

I may be in the DC area later this month. I’ll have my going out of town wig and keep you all posted.

6 07 2008
Sister Toldja

“I saw this oh so handsome cutie from Brooklyn there. He was a caramel delight and about 6′4.”

*Weeps openly*

Is THAT where he went? Cause all the men I see in Brooklyn are gangbanging midgets.

6 07 2008
Knatural

Not as bad as stush (great word), but just awkward; but I did leave too early to gauge properly 😦
Shabooty? Didn’t even speak, and was wearing shades. “Tom Harkin” was with a girl 😀 so he ‘couldn’t’ speak.

6 07 2008
Muse

ST I’m so sorry about your friend. I know the feeling. I’ve been there before.

I will so hit you up when I’m in NYC. I have jury duty starting tomorrow so hopefully I won’t get picked for a case.

6 07 2008
Muse

Wait was “Tom Harkin” the one with the white girl?

Oh lord.

ST. Caramel delight was VERY attractive and nice. He said something about getting sworn in the bar on Monday. FUCK i hate myself.

He was a good…dancer.

6 07 2008
Muse

I think he was celebrating with his friends who were also very nice.

6 07 2008
Deesigner

I’m just tryin’ to get some sh*t started because yesterday:

1. I hosted a Bridal Shower…
2. At a cupcake boutique….
3. For my Pastor’s Daughter.

I hate my life.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Wow that is really… goody2shoes dee

smelling good is a kicker. Smelling good when getting sweaty in a club is positively an afrodisiac. ANd it will get you in trouble. the one time that guy pulled his penis out on my in the club was b.c. he smelled good. But as soon as he did that I walked right away from him in the empty as basement room of platinum dick out and everything. but I had some serious memory problems that night b.c. i almost started dancing with him again (he was cute, tall, thin and smelled INCREDIBLY good) b.c. i forgot what he looked like. Luckily I remembered he was too broke for the coat check otherwise my 2 leftover shreds of dignity would’ve been lost in the wind.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

I thought that was the infamous tom harkin. Oh wait no i thought the one who looked like a turtle was tom harkin cuz he had the stank look on his face. However i was too late in the game to truly understand who this tom harkin character was.

6 07 2008
Admiral Furious

LOOK WHO’S BACK…

I’m truly sorry that I missed out on Park… but being a home owner is a friggin bear.

There’s a helluva lot of comments here.. and I’m astonished by some of the responses listed here. Am I detecting some saltiness from those who participated in Friday’s festivities?

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea, they weren’t very social. but then again the club isn’t the place for chitchatter. I didn’t end up talking to anybody really, even chris.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Nah cap’n i had a good time with the girls. We’re just talking about the surprise about how some people’s online personalities don’t match their in-person one at all. ATALL

6 07 2008
Muse

Just salty about not getting Brooklyn cutie’s number. FUCK. Talk about regrets.

6 07 2008
Admiral Furious

Interesting… how so? The tone in your words seems quite salty. You did indeed say that a club isn’t really a place for being chit chat social.

6 07 2008
Muse

Will is right…

I’m quite sophisticated, soft spoken and prude….

Hehehe my nose is growing …..

6 07 2008
Jen

wnbt!! That isn’t fair! If somebody met me in person they would think I was a deaf-mute.

I think it should be expected that someone’s online personality won’t match their real-life persona!

6 07 2008
Muse

I don’t think Will sounds salty. I believe Will is just commenting on some of the observed behavior. BTW she came with her MAN so it’s not like she was there trying to get in someone’s boxer’s.

6 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Observations” eh?

Hehe….hehehe……hehehehehehe……

I’m taking the high road. Everyone have a wonderful Sunday 🙂

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

haha Nah. And thats not tru Jen. Muse acts exactly like her online personality. Knatural, not so much. I don’t know how much I do but i’m not really sure how I come across. The doc… well considering how we planned to go to fleet week I guess she did act exactly like her online personalty. No mostly its the idea of who would be fun at a party and I was severely disappointed in shabooty. I guess I may sound salty b.c. of that. I appreciate good partiers. If I go to BK and find ST to be quiet and shy, sipping wine in the club I’m going to talk about that shit too.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea Muse, you are a total PRUDE.

…reservations for one across the river styx, reservations for 1.

6 07 2008
shabooty

WAHHH imma shitty partier WAHHH

(:

6 07 2008
Muse

your nose is growing will

6 07 2008
Jen

P.S. This is off-subject, but, Blog Author – you have changed my life.

This morning, I read your post about empire waist tops and it was as though I was reading it for the first time.

I realized that I do, indeed, look four months pregnant in these tops and have only been wearing them so that I may continue to drink milkshakes and eat cake and ice cream every day. Empire waist tops are evil, and have detracted from me maintaining optimal levels of fineness.

So, I am going to put down the sugar for a month, and may even get rid of my 30000 maternity-looking tops as inspiration for eating like a normal human being.

Again, my thanks.

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

pttbbbb! don’t you know you exist only to entertain me easter island?

6 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Jen has had a breakthru. Thank you chris.
I have always told people that empire waist tops made me personally look pregnant. Bastards always trying to recommend them. Stupid hos. When people are smiling at you when you’re wearing them its because they think you’re expecting, not because they think you look cute.

NEway, packing, seriously

6 07 2008
vitazza

Gladd to know all of you did enjoy yourselves this holiday!!!!!

6 07 2008
Jen

Empire waist tops are truly a chunky girl crutch.

Also, I think that the person responsible for the onslaught of these and the shapeless shift dresses that are currently popular was a chunky, middle-aged woman whose day in the sun had passed and who wanted to create a fashion equalizer that would dampen the competitive advantage of fit women in attracting suitable men.

I see you, bitch!!!!

6 07 2008
Muse

My personality is reflective of my environment. Muse at work is VERY different than Muse hanging out with her family or Muse at the club. I’m an extrovert in the truest form. My energy comes from who I’m around. But overall my core personality is that I love having a good time, outgoing, and I like to make folks feel welcomed. So my online personality matches many aspects of me in real life.

With that being said, I didn’t come to the party with expectations in terms of personality. Folks tend of have more filters/barriers in person. So it comes to no surprise that some folks weren’t exuberant as there were online.

6 07 2008
Mrs.Epps

For the record.. my online personality is def the same as my in person personality…I’m nasty minded, loud, obnoxious,opinionated,curse like a sailor, fun and ballsy 🙂 love me or hate i dont give a fuck!!!! off to play Wii with the neighbors..

the end..

6 07 2008
vitazza

BTW…I will expect that some fines need to be re-visited and re-calcutated …you know who you are carry on

6 07 2008
The Doc Is In

Awww, why everybody getting all salty over here?! I enjoyed everyone’s personalities…oh wait, except for Muse and WNBT I don’t think I actually talked to anyone, LMAO. *Sigh* I’m a fucking mess.

Oh Muse, if I did beat your ass in your sleep, you got me back with a good one or two. My right elbow is scraped, red and itchy. I think I need a fucking tetanus shot.

6 07 2008
Lolo

Muse sounds like she was the one to be with Thursday. The men sound like they might have been better off staying in and watching Sex in the City……

6 07 2008
Muse

No Doc was LOL.

6 07 2008
ViK

So…which one of you hoochies woke up with Chris? 😀 I know it was at least 3 of y’all!

6 07 2008
The Doc Is In (mobile)

Shit Muse! You missed out on some 6’4 hap-penis because of me? Dude, I’d have been fine sleeping in the bathroom or something. I have to rectify this…did you get a name, license plate, partial print? Should we work with a police sketch artist? Trust, I know people…

Okay, and seriously what is this “interesting” shit? As someone with a dance background, hearing this hurts my heart. Please tell me I was at least on the fucking beat (well I might’ve missed a couple as I was trying to get my balance and keep from wiping out on the floor). At least I didn’t go into drunken cheoreographed 8 counts, complete with boom kats. I have been known to do that, usually an N’Sync routine, LOL. Also, does anyone have a timeline on all this? I swear I only remember dancing for like ten minutes, but to hear y’all tell it I reinacted Sweating To the Oldies Volumes 1-4, LOL.

Lastly, I must’ve still been drunk when I wrote my last post, as clearly Knat should’ve been included in the list of people I remember talking to.

6 07 2008
The Doc Is In (mobile)

WNBT…I keep meaning to ask you, what is a “CI”? I’m sure it’s something freaking cutesy (like you and he are) and not one of the vulgar explanations I’ve thought up…

7 07 2008
Admiral Furious

Being a person who was not there and has only read the responses here… I beg to differ as to whether the tones here are salty or not.

This kind of denial and hypocrisy is one of the reasons why I have ceased coming here to my good friend’s site.

7 07 2008
Muse

Doc,

Caramel Delight had some cute friends as well. In this situation we all lost… But we can utilize your investigative skills. We must go to Brooklyn and find Caramel Delight.

But as for your interesting dance moves…There was one time I saw your hands were on the ground while the guy had your legs wrapped around his waist and you were popping your ass in the air all at the same time. I lack the upper body strength to try such a daring move.

Lolo were you expecting some pornographic stories? No vagina was pounded that I know of.

7 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Muse sounds like she was the one to be with Thursday. The men sound like they might have been better off staying in and watching Sex in the City……”

Dunno bout that. It’s not the men I hear complaining…unless you’re just into that kinda thing 😉

7 07 2008
ChaoticDiva

*feels left out*

7 07 2008
Muse

Maybe my brain isn’t on but who’s salty/complaining about anything? I fabulous time so WTF are people talking about?! I thought everyone else had fun. Was I that drunk where folks were mad as hell? Did I miss something?!

If some folks didn’t want to talk or interact then that’s within their rights. Fuck! Maybe it’s not that deep? I can only speak for myself but I’m not going to force anyone to have a conversation with me. I wanted everyone to have a good time and let loose in a social setting. I was even inviting folks back to the hotel if they needed to crash. It’s the kind of person I am.

To know me is to love me. : )

BTW Fuck everyone putting extras on shit.

7 07 2008
Angry IV

Ah, the Admiral. God bless you, Sir.

7 07 2008
maya

Ummm…Inquiring minds want to know if Prudence received her money back from Angry IV, given that he did not show up after all the brew-ha-ha.

7 07 2008
ViK

Lolo were you expecting some pornographic stories? No vagina was pounded that I know of.

Boooooooooo. I wanted some walk of shame stories for Monday. Boooooo.

7 07 2008
Vanita

I am SO very angry that i missed what seemed to be like a good TIME!!! Dammit!!

7 07 2008
Brown Sugar

Awww.. *pout* I missed the festivities. Glad you guys had fun!

7 07 2008
Sylph

No incriminating photos? Damn.

I’m glad that you all are okay and have recovered for the most part.

7 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Nothing cutesy Doc, CI for current interest. Damn, when did I turn into that cutesy bitch. fuck i’m sad. And exhausted thanks to the damn tony coaches lying ass I didn’t get to my house until 3:30 this morning and now i have to go work with little half-humans at 8:30 in the village. I hate everything. And if you reading more into what I was saying, have a good time nitpicking shit. A sister can’t even mention some shit without someone accusing her of having some imaginary feelings.
Don’t take the Doc anywhere if you can’t hang. And i mean possibly hang upside down by the chandelier. Doc, you danced without stopping, pausing, or slowing down for at least 2.5hrs. I don’t know if you were dancing in the restaurant. You would’ve made Uncle Luke proud.

7 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Also, I hate smileys but if i have to put them as punctuation after every time my sarcastic ass makes a joke, I’ll shoot somebody and stop coming here damnit. 😉

Ooh I’m pissy this morning and definitely going to be late. carp

7 07 2008
Lolo

Muse, now don’t go mixing me up with Mrs. Epps now. I so wasn’t thinking about the vagina pounding.

Actually, I’m amused but not shocked that Shabooty turns out to be mild mannered in person.

7 07 2008
The Doc Is In

Muse – “There was one time I saw your hands were on the ground while the guy had your legs wrapped around his waist and you were popping your ass in the air all at the same time.”

Um, I just pulled out my protractor and some graph paper and sketched out a couple diagrams…that’s not even physically possible. And even if it were, if there is no photographic evidence I am forced to conclude that you are speaking lies, damn lies. 🙂

7 07 2008
The Doc Is In

WNBT – okay, the fact that “Current Interest” honestly never even crossed my mind but “Coochie Investigator” figured prominently, says sooo much about me. I suck at life, LOL.

7 07 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAH…
I hate you Doc!

7 07 2008
Admiral Furious

Muse the simple fact that you responded with such passion obviously shows that you are the one in the most denial about being upset. With that we state the term O.U.G.H. I hope you did have fun that evening… but again the statements listed here by not only you but others seem to me, the Admiral, as being such of loath and complaint. I feel sorry that you all did not have the time you “thought” you were going to have and I truly hope that future visits will come as more eventful. If those ever come about.

Big up Angry IV. What happened to the Beta versions man?

7 07 2008
Lolo

Well, I guess I read too quickly but Muse came across like she had a good time.

7 07 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yes a good time was had by all. People who believe otherwise are trying too hard to achieve some unknown goal.

Cootchie Investigator!!!! AHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAAHHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHHHHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA
I may change the meaning of CI to that.

I will say there may be no photographic evidence doc but considering I can now detailedly describe the underoos you were wearing friday night may hold up in court. And I wasn’t the one who you slept with.

8 07 2008
Muse

Lolo you didn’t misread anything. Admiral Furious is reaching and making something out of nothing.

Admiral Furious

-Please show me where I implied or stated that I didn’t have a great time.
-Please show me where I implied or stated that the gathering at Park didn’t meet my expectations
-Considering that you 1)Never met me 2) Wasn’t a Park to witness my enthusiasm 3) Or hear/read me say anything about being disappointed, you clearly don’t have no evidence to support your conclusion that I somehow angry/disappointed about the night.

You are really fishing for something that isn’t there. Please believe that my response has more to do with my annoyance of how folks are trying feed bullshit into a fun drama free night.

8 07 2008
Taint

y’all bullshittin…

Does he look good?! Can he dance?! aaaand can he dress?!

Chop, cop ladies!

8 07 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Yea, I’m hot. And to prove it, here’s a picture of me, Shabooty, and Chicken Jon:

8 07 2008
Taint

Cute.

But for real, statistics are just not in your favor. It’s very rare to find a dude with all your bangin ass qualities— and he not be a socially awkward- sex him with your eyes closed- maybe i’ll grow to love him— type fellow…

Have you ever heard of Jodeci? (;

8 07 2008
Muse

Awww does Taint have an e-crush on Chris? Well I’m not going to help you much because from what I remember…

-Chris is attractive in person
-He looked clean cut
-He’s very tall and kinda lanky
-He can dance/has rhythm and kept up with Doc’s wild ass
-and he doesn’t smell funny either. (pre-vomit of course)

But these are the observations of someone who had alcohol so take my statements at face value.
; )

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