To My Readers: The Project

17 06 2008

All,

Sorry that there’s no post today – I spent last night working on an extra-secret…project…related to this blog and never got around to writing an actual entry.

Because of this…project…I’m going to be posting regular entries only on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday until the…project…is complete. I’ll still post stuff on Tuesdays and Thursdays (except today), but it’ll be something other than and shorter than my usual entries.

I’m hoping to have the results of the…project…available in the Fall.

In case anyone is wondering, here are some details about what the…project…is not:

  • I did not get a book deal
  • I am not building a tiny fort
  • I am not making a movie, music video, television series, or mock-u-mentary
  • Chuck Norris is not involved in the…project

See you fuckers tomorrow.

Figure 1: Self-Portrait

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423 responses

17 06 2008
Deesigner

No problem, we will just highjack your comments section for our own twisted amusement.

17 06 2008
Esquire

I am not building a tiny fort

Damn. That was my guess

17 06 2008
Deesigner

No problem, we will just highjack your comments section for our own twisted amusement.

17 06 2008
vitazza

Chris, I hate you.
your site has been blocked at work so now I skulk around with my phone all day reading……

ok.. well what will it be tday folks???

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

What the hell kind of…project….takes all summer, and is not a book deal or a mock-u-mentary? And why the dramatic pause before you say the word….project? And where the hell am I supposed to channel all of my hate on Tuesdays and Thursdays? I’m sorry. That’s not your problem. I apologize for my language. I hope everything goes well with your….project.

17 06 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

We generate our own random hate on Tues and Thurs…I’m sure some of you have PLENTY of it.

*died at the dr. evil pic…what COULD Chris possibly have up his sleeve*

17 06 2008
Number Two

So Chuck Norris isn’t involved, but what about Alan Parsons?

17 06 2008
www.thewhyblog.net

Sounds interesting. Will stick around to check it out.

http://www.thewhyblog.net

17 06 2008
Knatural

No Chuck Norris!??! Then this “project” is worthless.

17 06 2008
stuffgirlslike

Project is secret, you are just putting in google adsense, to make a few bob.

Plus You are now going on the comedy circuit.

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

17 06 2008
Cheekie

The ellipses between the word, “project” scares me for some reason.

But, can’t wait to find out what it is!

17 06 2008
Knatural

No Chuck Norris!??! Then this “project” is worthless.

17 06 2008
benjie

damn
i wanted it to involve chuck norris.
so it could have cool fighting sequences ala “sidekicks”

it wouldve been awesome!

17 06 2008
creativecat

Chuck Norris is always involved. Chuck Norris sees and knows all. Some people mistake God for Chuck Norris when the truth is that in the beginning when God said “Let there be light,” Chuck Norris said, “Say please.”

17 06 2008
klysha

There goes my morning procrastination hour. I guess this lack of a long post today is beneficial to my job retention since I’m currently supposed to be preparing a presentation to do for the public on Thursday…so far I have an opening powerpoint slide locked down….now I have no choice but to get back to work on it curses!!$%@(%&$@%&

http://www.mysixcents.wordpress.com

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

hmm sounds fishy..jokes…ok Chris i dunno how i will survive work with out you today.. but I guess I’ll have to manage..BLAH…i guess i’ll actually work today…DAMMIT

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Dont tell me that Bob Johnson took over your blog! fuck..

and what do you mean Chuck Norris has nothing to do with it..Chuck Norris makes everything happen…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

So what will be our topic today….hmmm..sex..job…kids…sex…ummm..tv…movies…food…hair oil…sex…oh i said sex already hahaha opps…

17 06 2008
JaBe

Good luck on your uhm…project…

17 06 2008
Esquire

Bob Johnson? Who the hell brought him up and why? He should have been an extra in the Happening, if you catch my drift.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

wait hair oil? Do you think we could spin a whole topic out of hair oil? I mean yesterday was informative but… Man I’m scared that this project is going to be wack, like some updated new and fancy website. and I don’t need fancy, i just need regular bouts of hate and hilarity. With some sex on the side. Oh wait what if … the project… is a compendium of all our sex comments. That would be worth the wait. I don’t know if video added to our comments would be good or bad. i’m scared again.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

maybe he’s going to make a section for the regulars on the comment sections.. like a members only club hahah

17 06 2008
The Doc Is In

LOL@Esquire.

*waving a ficus in Bob Johnson’s face*

17 06 2008
Knatural

“Bob Johnson? Who the hell brought him up and why? He should have been an extra in the Happening, if you catch my drift.” AHAHAHAHAQHHAHAHAHHAHKKHAH for real!

17 06 2008
The Doc Is In

My “The Project” guess…

How about a video game where we can get points for stuff like kicking baby pandas and throwing flaming business cards at fake ass CEOs with Masters degrees.
Or better yet, a Harry Potter-esque invisibility cloak so I can do that shit in real life with impunity.

17 06 2008
Cheekie

Oh, Chuck Norris is involved. He’s hiding behind the ellipses.

But, since we’re guessing, is the “project” a chatroom?

17 06 2008
ishouldbeworking

Let me find out that I missed out on some vital hair oil related commentary. All because I wasn’t too intrigued by the Panda topic so I actually decided to do some work yesterday. Damn, damn, damn.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ok ppl i mentioned Bob Johnson…it was me dammit.. i know that if i typed his name ppl would get angry and comment on it and theni would have something to read..sorry guys..hahha

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

OOO if the project was a chatroom..everyone would def be fired and in the unemployment line

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

We can’t have a chatroom-my life would stand completely still. i would get noooo work done and my supervisor would wonder why in the hell I was always sneakinga way to get on some computer.

17 06 2008
shabooty

way to tickle our collective asses with a native american feather.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

see all sorts of people asked me who shabooty was when I became a facebook fan of him yesterday. now how can I describe you? I need help, can we turn this into a how to describe shabooty to non-regulars episode?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

If there were a chatroom i would fail out of school and never hold a job. I would have to throw away my computer. Aw.. i miss the late nineties

17 06 2008

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW? WORK????????????????????

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

@ishouldbeworking= The panda post was the best post ever on this site. Ever. But it did devolve into a lot of haircare. BTW wheres nappypeen? Listening to pandora all day?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ahaha WNBT…shababy, sandman,potty mouth, random hilarity Shia Lebouf look alike lol i dunno thats how i described him to one of my girlfriends..she thinks he he’s hot..he actually looks like a combo of one of her ex’s and one of mine hahaha weird..

17 06 2008
D.R.L.F.

I’m listening to “Fresh Air” on NPR featuring an interview with Sean Combs. He has said the word “li-berry” several times while mentioning attending Howard University. He must die.

17 06 2008
Omar

Hmm…no movie and no book… the project could be a stage play about hating black stage plays about some irrelevant persons momma.

17 06 2008
shabooty

that’s Sha LaBooty to you 🙂

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I know, Chris is building a ship in a bottle that he’s going to name the TomatoHead (who he’s going to model the wench on the front of it after) which will be piloted by Admiral Furious which he will thinks we can all jump on to go on a cruise. Because he’s gone Howard Hughes crazy, as evinced by the panda prostelyzing yesterday.

17 06 2008
ishouldbeworking

willnotbetelevised , I just spent about 20 minutes skimming through the haircare comments. I read the post yesterday but skipped the comments for the mostpart. It’s amazing how much more productive I am when I stay away from this blog. I read it daily but I don’t comment as much as most of the regulars. They are like the cool kids table so I jut revert to my highschool self and just stay on the outside looking in.

I’m mad that the …project… won’t be revealed until the fall. 😐

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Maybe CreoleBooty kidnapped Chris and left this message so we wouldn’t call the law

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ShaLaBooty..good one…

Building a ship in a bottle…and OMG@ Howard Hughes..speaking of which my man is totally in love with planes n shit dude had me sitting in the livingroom watching Aviator..that was the boringest(sp) movie in the freaking world..i actually watched it all the way through…lasttime we watched it i fell asleep 10 mins in…

Chris is trying to find the cure for blue balls…thats his project

17 06 2008
Sylph

I couldn’t help but hear Dr. Evil’s voice in my head when I came to the word project, complete with bad finger quotes.

How am I going to start my birthday on Thursday without my daily dose of hate? That’s just plain cruel. Whatever it is, I hope it’s successful and you won’t torture us mercilessly with hints. Knowing you, you prolly will.

“Chuck Norris is not involved in the…project ”

Yes he is. First rule about Chuck Norris is we don’t talk about Chuck Norris.

P.S. I *heart* you, Number Two.

17 06 2008
Knatural

“Chris is trying to find the cure for blue balls…thats his project”
AHHAHAHAHHAHHHAHAHAHAH He has ‘the woman’ to help, right?
Number Two is my hero.

17 06 2008
Hot,Cool&Vicious

My loony bun is fine Benny Lava!

17 06 2008
Landon

NO Post –

Work Productivity gone up 150% in NYC, Phi, ATL & DC…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol Benny Lava…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

There’s nappypeen! Welcome home, did you enjoy your music?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I love this commercial “A girl can i hit you back”? LMAOOOOOOOOOOO

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

nappypeen? lost…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Landon’s new name due to his inattention to grooming

17 06 2008
Landon

? how the hell did i get that?
because i dont have a rainforrest growing?

17 06 2008
Knatural

Nappypeen? Gross. Landon you need some clippers for your pubes?? Employ caution around the scrote, ok.

17 06 2008
Imsoalmondie

*SIGH*
Im sad… this is my daily drug… I have nothing more to say at this time.
*Pout*

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

OHHHHhhhhhhh got it..hahah…

off topic..well nvm there is not topic..you know what annoys me…that over-achiver at work that expects to get acknowleged every time he does something right.. THIS AINT THE 1ST GRADE!! you dont get the gold star!!! he feels the need to repeat to me over and over again about all the good shit he has done in the past few weeks like i give a flying fuck…go tell someone else your bugging me..or the overly talkative mofo that happens to always catch me in my office doing work and wants to gossip and talk about her weekend like im her bestfriend…OYE…i need a vaca…one more month til the bahamas YES!!!!!

17 06 2008
Landon

I be damned you guys get on me like this…

You guys allies — dont get on the MUSE list… j/k lol 🙂

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon looks jungle man down there aye…snip snip por favor y gracias…oh and landon just cuz you think that all the bush is ok for you doesnt mean the girl going down there does 🙂 food for thought…

17 06 2008
Landon

i have a feeling she would have trouble reaching the bush…

but like i said… my ish is maintained…

i saw a porno once and the girl had her hair corn rolled down there… i damn near choked laughing so hard…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

ahh you brought it on yourself, demanding bald kitty but not grooming at all yourself. Hypocrisy breeds nicknames.

17 06 2008
london

nappypeen.. hilarious…
you should try 2 strand twists at night…
nice bush in the morning… or leave them in!

chris.. i am not biting…
i can only get on here in the evenings and first thing in the morning if i wake up with you and this lot in my head… or maybe during the day if i pull a sickie..

so on the down low baby… is mr t involved? dr who? inspector gadget? angelina jolie?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

i was going to ask where muse was but i just saw her over on VSB talking about her tig ole biddies. The brothas readership/commentship is probably going to go up during this ….project…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oooh i love dr. who, i just found out about him when i was in costa rica over last noveimbre. And i like that he has a black chic medical student traveling with him now. I had to go get my scifi channel on for their marathon a while back. Oh England, is there no television you can’t improve? I wish i got a bbc here. (and bbc america doesn’t count)

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol@ London too funnnnnnyy…Chris is entering witness protection so Creole Booty cant find him…

17 06 2008

I keep coming back hoping that chris hated something today so much he’d sneak in a post….

I am disappointed yet again

17 06 2008

Oh and thanks to yesterday’s post I will NEVER look at those rascist asshole panda’s the same.

17 06 2008
Angel30

Does anyone listen to Wendy Williams? That’ll give you something to do for the next few hourse. She’ll be on shortly. She’s nationally sindicated – on in N.Y., not sure where else. I have to listen on-line, so if you’re like me, go to http://www.broadcasturban.net/player/wbls/player.htm#
She is HILLARIOUS.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

If this supposed ship in a bottle is being made and I am the model for the wench in the front I have some demands:

1. I want to be a mermaid; I am not a bar wench.

2. I refuse to hold a sword; violence is not the answer.

3. No nipples can be shown. I want a shell bra like Ariel.

4. I want a bif ol’ afro. I can’t grow one but dammit I want one if i’m gonna be a ship wench.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

that should be *big ol afro

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I’m forced to drink some Starbucks today and semi-socialize with my co-workers..since i dont have my daily dose of SBPH med’s…I’m all bored today too…I think i will be the girl version of Shabooty and type random thoughts

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

And Landon, don’t make me get on you about the bald kitty thing again. That is sheer stupidity and out in the open pedophilia. You like your women to look like Barbies or prepubescent girls?

17 06 2008
Landon

????

17 06 2008
Knatural

TomatoHead – what shells would fit?

17 06 2008
Dustin

What the fuck!?

17 06 2008
nubnqtndc

chuck norris is involved in everything
my guess is chris is off killing smurfs and fraggles

17 06 2008
Landon

not fraggle rock

17 06 2008
Anna

Maybe it’s a forum

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

mmm Debra thinks those girders from those little green people on fraggle rock would be a tasty after lunch snack.
TomatoHead, I’m guessing someone has to go diving for giant clams now. Any loss of life is on your head. You’re lucky chris is making the model ship. Angry or shabooty would not fulfill your request. Actually if chris actually has gone howard hughes you better watch out, he might show up at your doorstep with some rope and a saw.
SMH nappypeen, no one here will ever forget your lust for prepubescent girls now. My work here is done. muahhaha*

*see what happens if i don’t get my dose of SBPH, I have to entertain myself now.

17 06 2008
JD

I like the Bill Brasky facts more than Chuck Norris. He hated Mexicans. And he was half Mexican himself… and he hated irony.
http://www.sloarsociety.150m.com/billbrasky.html

17 06 2008
Knatural

She needs two giant “Birth of Venus” shells (nerd) AHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oh and can i get brainy smurfs head stuffed and mounted on my wall if he gets him. I always hated that smug bastard.

17 06 2008
Muse

Damn Landon there you go again mentioning my name when there was no reason to. You really like it when I pay attention to your silly ass huh?

17 06 2008
Muse

Did you finally get hooked up on that Rogain?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oshit! who is bill brasky? I tried to go to that link and it was denied by my job under pornography? You really are trying to get me fired. What did I ever do to you JD?! Dang I told you tomorrow was my last day anyway.

17 06 2008
Landon

will notbetelevised — see i a concerned about you know…

you seem to be that girl on the beach with a bikini on but her pubic hair be sprouting out the side like weeds in an unkept lawn….

((((throwing up in mouth))))))))

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

uhoh, here it goes again, Dang and I almost bought some yogurt covered raisins at lunch too. And now the concession stand is closed. if anyone else is going can you get me some raisinets

17 06 2008
Landon

just found out whitecastles serves sweet tea 🙂 i am in love!

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Bill Brasky – famous SNL skit

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Nah son, firstly I don’t do bikinis, secondly I groom well. No escapage, no reaching out to grab you, but there’s a little lawn left to let you know i’m legal. Just as you should do for your (nonexistant) woman. When you get a chic, i’m sure you will, you gotta take a weedwhacker to that bush boyo, its only polite. once again no one wants to floss with someone else’s renegade pube. But we went over this already, take notes.

see i a concerned about you know wtf you been smoking on the job buddy? You lucky I speak a little crazy, otherwise i wouldn’tve got you.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

BTW, are you allowed to just go and change your screen name like that TomatoHead?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

white castle sweet tea is great too. Guranteed to give you the diabeetus. And my friend got me the hookup on a package of my very own. Unfortunately you need a coffee maker to make it an i aint got one.

17 06 2008
Vanita

Where the hell is a WhiteCastle? And A Sonic for that matter?!?! I always see the damn commercial advertising happy hour for half off slushie, but I dont know where a damn store is!!! And I hear their onion rings are good…

17 06 2008
Landon

Willnotbetelevised —

just because your last man had his Pubic Hair in Dreadlocks dont be mad at me because you still have flashbacks…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LOL WTF…Bill Brasky…JD who are you??

and umm landon…See i concerend about you know…umm righhhttt…who let you out the cage?

Landon is one of your friends yoda? cuz foreal umm that was some backwards ass shit there…

Landon: Bush between my legs i have…

lol

17 06 2008
Landon

the only sonic i have been to was in atl… never seen one in NY… that is like when i was growing up i always saw commericals for lil ceasars pizza but there was not one in NY…. later i found out there was “1” in the bronx…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Vantia, Whitecastle is in NJ and NY..Sonic…well there are a bucnh in florida soo um south i guess..and why the fuck do the show commericals of jack in the box when the only ones i know of are in cali and i live in MD…DAMMIT..and everytime i see a Sonci commercial i want a Coney Dog and a Cherry limade slushie..hmppp damn them to hell

17 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:

You and this notion i am going bald… I dont get it… I really don’t. ANd if i was going bald thankfully i am black man which means i can just shave my head… and if that was the problem it would be fix… You had the same problem but you were able to borrow a weave from Diana Ross I know…

I didnt even say anything bad about you… I was going to offer an olive branch to ya… i feel like the blood and crips with you… we are beefing but no one really knows how it all started!

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Sonic**

17 06 2008
Landon

Mrs. Epps you are part Butter Rican… yall be some hair MoFo’s so lets not talk about your AFRO down there… you prob have to hire some mexicans to keep it maintained, lol…. joking… my girl is a Latina… i kid i kid…

17 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:

Whats Beef?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Landon, you put yourself out there about having peen naps and not grooming. Nobody’s having flashbacks, cuz i aint never been wit you. we wouldn’t work out kitten. brands turn me off.

Vanita where are you? there’s white castle in manhattan and all over jersey. I just ate there for the first time last week. The tea was mmm mmm delishuous but the burgers were scary. the layer of grease was 3x thicker than the burger itself. strangely enough i had krystal in nashville before and prefer them.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Yea how did the Landon vs Muse start.. i forgot…

17 06 2008
JD

willnotbetelevised-
Apologize for your block. Anyone else who can see could tell you there aren’t any pics or anything like that. Just ridiculous quotes.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

there’s a sonic in richmond, so its working its way north methinks. Don’t know where one is around jersey though. Probably one hiding out somewhere, like the 5guys i found off 22.

17 06 2008
Landon

eeeeewwwwww Krystals… thats like the first time i went down south to Mcdonalds and i was tryign to figure out why in the there was Mustard on my Burger… i wanted to hit someone. Until i ralized all the fastfood spots in teh south put mustard on their burgers.

17 06 2008
Vanita

Yea, those damn Jack in the box commercials! Those burgers look so damn good…and I cant even try it. Its very sad that Im thinking about food although I am STUFFED, about to bust outta these pants. Did yall ever undo your jeans/pants button(at school/in class/at work) to let your belly expand?!?! LMAO and Im not even a fat girl yet!

17 06 2008
Muse

Landon I’m not beefing with you. I You just seem kinda slow.

And I have a lot of hair that’s mine. Thanks for noticing if you managed to figure out who I am.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Thanks for the apology but can you write a formal letter to my boss saying i was not trying to access a porn site? 🙂

wait landon, you got a chick? does she keep her kitten bald for you? and you still on here proud about not grooming!? You are a rude rude sextoy. If she’s a tip licker you now know why.

17 06 2008
Knatural

HAHAHAHA The Bill Brasky quotes are hilarious, some are lil homoerotic!

“They found $60 in change in his stomach.”
“He once ate the Bible while water skiing.”
“He has dandruff the size of mice!”
“They use Brasky’s foreskin as a tarp when it rains at Yankee stadium.”

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOOO@ Landon..hire some mexicans naw man.. i keep my shit correct..it may not be BALD but it aint hairy..good one though.. and yes Peeter Reekens are hairy you aint gotta tell me that hahah

but naw i gotta hire some Julio’s to do some landscaping on my front lawn..we need some grass out there!

OMG Krystal’s is the shiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttt!!!! sad they dont have any up here..this is way i miss Florida..dammit…I miss Krystal’s,Church’s,Sonic and Buffalo Wild Wings was my chill spot with the florida peeps

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Vanita, thats your inner fat girl trying to get out. Knatural has eating pants for her inner fat girl. I think thats pretty nice of her. You should introduce your inner fat girl to everyone elses. Mine is named Debra, nice too meet you. There’s Bethany, Bertha, Bonita and Bertha around here somewhere.

17 06 2008
Vanita

wnbt, Im in MD/DC, Philly on weekends until I move up there permantely in 3 wks. I dont think there are any Sonics/Jack in the Box/Krystals/WhiteCastles within a 30 mile radius of either city. So sad…

17 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Sneaky Indian

While having sex with a woman doggy-style, you, as quickly as possible, pull out of her vagina and insert your penis into her asshole. At the same time, you reach forward and cover and uncover her mouth with your hand. The desired effect is that when she yelps out of surprise and pain at your cock in her asshole, the covering and uncovering of her mouth will create a sound not unlike an Indian’s War cry.

Wild Bear gave Crazy Beaver the old Sneaky Indian last night, she hasn’t spoken to him since.

17 06 2008
Vanita

Is that what that is?!?! I dont know her name, Im just meetin her for the first time today…

17 06 2008
Landon

MUSE: have not taken the time… put friend me on facebook, i am sure we can work out a truce. Plus I would like to know who I am continuously battling with.

Mrs Epps: So sad no grass, damn black people and not takign care of their lawns…

Nottobetelevised: Dont think she can make it down that far without gagging… Now if a girl had no gag reflex a la SUPER Head then you might have an argument. but like i said. Its low as hell with out me having to cut it.

Its kind of like how i can’t grow a full beard. i am just not a hairy person.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Nah, there’s gotta be white castles in philly. But they dont put white castle in any neighborhood you want to visit. Much like checkers. In fact i’m surprised no one has mentioned checkers an their fries. Man checker’s fries are soo good, they never make it all the way home. And their burgers/sammiches are better too. Spicy chicken is tasty

17 06 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA…what?
If it’s that easy to sneakily ‘insert your penis into her asshole’, then you need to have a talk afterward. I hate Urban Dictionary, and I hate you for looking that up.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Bonita showed her face lastnight..when she ate 7 ribs,fries,a huge salad, 3 smoothies, 4 beers, and a 1/2 a bag of sour cream and onion chips along with a big slice of cookie cake…damn her…she must be stopped

17 06 2008
Landon

chekers is good and they have sweet tea… ummmmmmm sweet tea

17 06 2008
Knatural

Landon – shut up. Smegma breath.

17 06 2008
Landon

see mrs eps thats why beign 20 is nice, because when you turn 25 you cant be beating like that no more…

i use to be a fat bastard like that but skinny on the inside… now i have to work out about 3 to 4 times a week just to maintain my body and eating habits. 😦

17 06 2008
Ms. Kristine

Whew finally an under-350-comments post! 🙂

I can’t wait to find out what the”…project” is. If it a chat room, be prepared for the onslaught—you will need to hire an entire IT team to maintain it.

🙂

17 06 2008
B4Prez

@Vanita –

There’s not any of those restaurants in Philly…but what Philly does have is…..CHECKERS! I think there’s something shady when you can get 2 ‘big bufords’ for $3, but until I get ecoli/salmonella/a strange rash covering 35% of my body, Checkers is all good with me.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

so landon, you’re telling me that in fact, you are actually prepubescent yourself. That would explain why you like bald kittykats.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

While having sex with a woman doggy-style, you, as quickly as possible, pull out of her vagina and insert your penis into her asshole. At the same time, you reach forward and cover and uncover her mouth with your hand. The desired effect is that when she yelps out of surprise and pain at your cock in her asshole, the covering and uncovering of her mouth will create a sound not unlike an Indian’s War cry.

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Landon man it wasnt us it was the fuking dude that lived here before us that didnt put any grass in the front..aint nothign but fern n moss out there…its horrible

17 06 2008
Ms. Kristine

Ugh a typo!!!!! “If it is a chatroom”

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

If there really is a SBPH chat – I will personally call my IT dept. and tell them to block that $hit. That is too way too much distraction. It’s kinda like the crack did to Pookie….in New Jack

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon…just cuz i ate all that doenst mean it will not affect my body because it does..I have to work out..my metabolism isnt how it use to be hahaha…but i wanted to pig out but i gotta work off all the food to maintain my figure…dont get it twisted…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

wait the got the buford on 2 for $3?? mannnn, this week the special is 2 spicy chickens on 2 for $4. Checkers burgers are good b.c. they know they are dealing with complaining nickels and so all they burghers have a huge patty and a real slice of tomato etc on there. And all sammiches come with mayo. The best they had was that orange cream milkshake they had. I want that to come back… They’re milkshakes are good too but some checkers mess them up. I thought i was in for some trouble when i realized i moved into a place with a checkers less than 1 block away but i told myself i can only walk to that checkers. And there’s no sidewalk, glass all over and too many stray cats and stray crackheads for that to be a regular event.

17 06 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

Oh my gosh…no topic today, and SOME of y’all done lost your minds…thanks for keeping me SEMI entertained today.

Bill Brasky…that’s classic right there…WAY more of a legend than Chuck…though he’s not too far behind…

Off to VSB now…

17 06 2008
Muse

Chris that was nasty.

A sneaky Indian will cause some poor man to end up in the hospital.

Mrs. Epps should I tell Landonw who I am. Poor man really has no idea.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

btw Checkers Bacon Chedder Ranch fries are the shit..and thier burgers…no words.. i usually get the chicken strips when i go though..i love me some chicken strips.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Muse please do so he can stfu hahaha

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

we all know who pookie is cousin, no need for disclaimers. And these comments are just as bad as a chat. I gotta do some work, lunch break over.

17 06 2008
Landon

you know butter ricans look great up into the age of 25?

but after 25 yall dont age like black folks…

when a black woman stays in shape no one ages better than a black woman… hands down!

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I don’t know how you couldn’t guess. But singlenappeen (feel better?) hasn’t been with us long, so mebbe he can’t tell.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

That’s dirty that we have to wait until fall to find out what the top secret that we heard about at the beginning of summer is. If patience is a virtue, then I fukn hate virtues! I hate waiting. I even hate waiters. And weight. And….u get the picture.

Anyone wanna take bets out on what this ‘project is’?

17 06 2008
Vanita

LMAO! I think Ill call my inner fat girl TiTi…This weekend she ate 3 big pieces of sppare ribs, 2 pieces of bbq chix, two turkey burgers and two pieces of corn, alot of potato salad, and 3 coronas. And Im payin for it today…

b4prez, yea, Checkers is that SHIT. I used to go to the one on broad and girard after the club…big bufords was my shit, I used to eat two, and get a large fry. Those fries are so good that my cat used to try and steal the fries that fell out in the bag (dont they have a name?) and she DONT eat people food…

17 06 2008
Knatural

Um, some Peeter Reekans are Black Landon. Are did you mean Black Americans? Wait, isn’t PR part of America now. Shit, I confused myself. Landon, just be quiet.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol well luckily for me landon I only have part Bori not full..yes some Bori women after the age 25 look like trolls…but i have more black in me than Boris so i’m all good in that aging gracefully department.

17 06 2008
Muse

See why Landon annoys me. He continues to spread ignorance. A lot of puerto ricans are Black.

Man someone shove a cane up Landon’s ass so he can shut up LOL.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

PR are black but they have to fight that latina part of them (bonita) that wants to get all rollypoly/plumpdiddlylumpcious and have babies by 25. And be short. Tis a terrible struggle. 🙂 j/k

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Yonnie, I believe that I can change my screenname at will as long as I properly inform the masses. (Used to be NotBlonde folks)

I also believe that giant clam shells would be the only ones that fit and I would happily pay any family who loses a loved one on the search for the shells.

And Knat, I fully agree that if Birth of Venus shells existed, they would do well in keeping my breasts in check.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Knat.. yea PR have black boris that’s what my grandparents are. Not all Boris are those light skinned, light eyes, curly haired video ho’s ya’ll see. Most are actually brown to dark brown with mixed hair like me..if you look at my pic i dont even look part latina i look black.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I consider all peeters black. And all cubanos (in this country) white. But I have a detailed and firm racial breakdown of this country.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

What i don’t get about certain Latina women (not all, of course) is the box look. They have skinny legs and hugely fat upper bodies with broad shoulders and no waist definition and really small breasts. Like they are flesh boxes on top of spindly legs. How does that happen?

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Now I know why I got harassed by these Puerto Rican girls at Chevy’s. They said something to me in spanish and I was like, I don’t speak spanish. Then they asked me if I was Puerto Rican and I said no. They promptly turned their backs on me and whispered in spanish “She LOOKS Puerto Rican”, like I was denying my “heritage” or something.

17 06 2008
Landon

call a butter rican black and see what happens… why do you think OBAMA lost PR… there is a major Rif in the Latino and black communities. Esp. in PR and DR.

a couple years ago in DR a (Darkskin) presidential candidate was in the lead but rumors spread that he was haitain, he ended up losing the election.

Samething in PR, they feel a black person should not be a leader or America. It is so confusing esp. since must of them are brown. If if you look at the majority of the politcal leaders in PR and DR they are all very fair skin, except for the mayor of Old San Juan but that is where the majority of black Butter Ricans live.

even here in NY if you called a DARK SKIN Rican black they might want to fight you. They take it as an insult.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOO@ WNBT girll you are soooo right…. the only way ppl see my true latina side is when i’m pissed the fuck off…that when you will back up when io mumble shit you cant understand under my breath and give you the crazy eye liek i’m bout to cut your ass…

yes i know how to use a knife..i have one under the love seat in our house as we speak and one in my purse 🙂

17 06 2008
Knatural

What i don’t get about certain Latina women (not all, of course) is the box look. They have skinny legs and hugely fat upper bodies with broad shoulders and no waist definition and really small breasts. Like they are flesh boxes on top of spindly legs. How does that happen?

AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAHH Cuz they got Indian in they family…

17 06 2008
B4Prez

Hell yea Vanita…Checkers’ line is crazy after the club. U can feed a family of 5 for $10! Sounds too good to be true, but oh well….How I miss Checkers!!!

And Muse be goin’ at Landon hard, and raw with no grease!!! When r yall gonna go in the back and take care of yall’s bizness?

If that’s not the accurate question, then when did yall break up?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

See thats what irriates me, part latina. they aren’t mutually exclusive. But if there’s White latina, and black latina what are the rest? latina latina? Double latina. Double mocha latte latina? I like the term indengero (sp?) but i prolly should be the judge since i also like calling people octaroons. (i’m a born instigator)

17 06 2008
Knatural

First of all, allowing PR to hold a primary, but they can’t vote during the general election in fall, was a joke. Sorry. Second, just because they’re in denial doesn’t refute the fact that they’re Black.

17 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:

i have a feeling i am the only one here who has lived in a Latin Country. Have more PR or DR friends then you and have been to both countries extensively. Dated women from bother islands. Hell my girl in domincan but porn in PR…. Ignorance, ah silly rabbit trixs are for kids.

IN DR their are clubs they would not let us into because we are to dark and similar places in PR… the racial divide in latino’s is greater then it is in america.

Pr, Dr, Colombia, Mexico (Costa CHica Afro-mexican villages) they look like they are guyeneese or cooli as someone said yest.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LAndon, yea your right about them not wanting a “darkskin” persident.. never understood that..but yea about Old San Juan..that is were most of the “black” puerto ricans live and in Ponce where my grandfather grew up.

I know many light skinned Boris in NY and they never believe i’m puerto rican..not even black ppl believe it becasue all they see is light skinned puerto ricans…Lightskinned puerto ricans can kick rocks…

but i can understand if they get mad if you call them black.. its like calling an El Slavadorian Mexican…it is insulting.

Personlly you can call me black.. because most of my family is…but i never forget about my puerto rican heritage.

17 06 2008
Landon

Mrs. Epps:

you right, i always get a little worried when my girl has a knife in her hand. You know how yall talk with your hands a lot and when she has a weapon in her hand i make sure i do not saying anything that might cause her to go muy loca on me! 2

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Exactly Knat! I don’t care how much they deny it all PR are negroes. And cubans count as white over here b.c they left all the black cubans back in cuba. And DR are in serious denial, but we all already knew that. Well at least every chick that ever stepped into a hair salon for that $10 doobie. Just cuz they don’t like it don’t mean its not true. Thats what really irritates me about some Dominicans. As black as your ass is you are in denial. crazy but they got some history to deal with to be able to come home. Brazilians were like that too, but i think its changing.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

If yall think the PRicans deny being black, then yall aren’t ready for the Dominicans. The NYers know what Im talkin about. U mistake a Dominican, who might be dark as Wesley Snipes, for black, and ur likely to get jumped! They DO NOT like being considered black, even though thier race is obviously black.

But how can u blame them, black ppl don’t even wanna be black. SMH

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

haha, all latinas are required to have at least 1 knife or razor blade on them at all times. Them heifers will cut you… 🙂

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LAndon-IN DR their are clubs they would not let us into because we are to dark and similar places in PR… the racial divide in latino’s is greater then it is in america.

OMG aint that some wack ass shit!!!! luckily the times i went to PR it wasnt liek that for me.. the guys there loved me..im nor light ass fuck or dark ass fuck..so i gues i got a pass i dunno.. but they were cool the light skinned ones stayed tryna holla!

17 06 2008
Esquire

Damn whoever posted the Wendy Williams link. DAMN YOU.

(pssst) I hate Bob Johnson

17 06 2008
Landon

but people for get latino is not a race its a ethnicity…. tha pisses people off… lol
its a mixture and 9 times out of 10 its part black… but oh well.

i am just tired of having to here instruction in english and spanish on my touchtone telephones when you tryign to make a credit card payment or something.

ITS AMERICA SPEAK ENGLISH PEOPLE and ebonics does not count either.

17 06 2008
Landon

GIrl you live in AMerica they are trying to make you have their babies so they can live you in your HOUSE 🙂

plus men in PR shape their Eyebrows… ((((throwing up in my mouth)))))

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon-you right, i always get a little worried when my girl has a knife in her hand. You know how yall talk with your hands a lot and when she has a weapon in her hand i make sure i do not saying anything that might cause her to go muy loca on me! 2

HAHAHHA YES OMGGG we esp talk with our hands my man get a little antsy around me when im cutting up fruit and telling him some crazy ass story..i have found myself pointing the knife at him when i talk not on purpose though i cant help myself hahaha he’llbe like “umm baby put the knife down..i love you..dont slip up and cut me”

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea, i love arguing with latinos who say that america is more racist than all latino countries b.c. if you got money and education or fame you don’t have to be ‘black’ anymore, even if you look straight nappy sudanese. Without recognition that labeling black as inherently negative is racist in and of itself. Freedom is not necessarily in being able to relabel yourself by becoming successful. Racial relations down there are interesting. Someone here posted an interesting link to an article on racial identity in DR a while ago that I read. It was really good and really sad. But they got beef with Haiti thats deep. Can’t share a small island I guess.

17 06 2008
Omar

@Landon – There is no contradiction between any type of hispanics and blacks most hispanic countries have some black people. People look at me crazy when I tell them my mother is from Costa Rica. We all got here on the same boats its just some of us are mixed with the spanish and others are mixed with the english or not mixed at all.

17 06 2008
Landon

What i dont understand abotu Domicans is that their independence day is not when they were freed from slavery from the Spanish and Chris Columbus (who they have a shrine to by the way), rather their indepednece day is when they broke free from the Haitains. Even though the Hatains freed them from slavery. But they did not want to be ruled y a darker race.

in the 50s-70s???? the dictator who was dark brown executed thousands of dark Domincans and Hatians because wanted to purify the Domincan race…. its really sad.

17 06 2008
Knatural

I understand Americans’ concept/definition of race is a little skewed or strange to those foreign-born, but I think this is why our country is so overwhelmingly “white”. Folks with pale skin from Cuba, DR, anywhere Caribbean, Iran, Lebanon, Northern Africa, etc., come here, are forced to check a box, and leave the rest of Us confused because they want to ‘pass’. Brainwashing at its best when folks, who are clearly colored in some way, with few ties to Europa, calling themselves White or denying their Blackness.

17 06 2008
Landon

Omar are you kidding me:

GO to Cali in Colombia
Costa Chica in Mexico
Villas in Brazil (City of God)
San Pedro (DR)
Old San Juan (PR)

and see the difference of living. its sad really really sad. It will bring a tear to your eye how the AFRo- Latinos are treated. I wanted to vulunteer in Colombia to build a school but the FARC start kidnapping too many people and the program i was goign with canceled the trip. Its really sad.

17 06 2008
Knatural

Also, sorry for the tangent, but I understand ‘race’ and ‘class’ are different in Latin America, but still.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

GIrl you live in AMerica they are trying to make you have their babies so they can live you in your HOUSE

and gag at Bori men and their shaped eyebrows..thats no good.. if a man’s eyebrows look better than mine thats horrible..thank god my man got some bush but still ok looking eyebrows…

We think that he has some latino in him…his dad looks dominican forealllllll..his dad dont even know what he is just that he is mixed with something lol

so if we do some testing we may find out im marrying a latino man instead of black…lol..you know its said when a 5 yr old speaks better spanish than you and she aint spanish LMAO..I havent spoken spanish in over 10 yrs…got that rosetta stone handy though when we take our trip to my Aunt’s house in Ponce. She speaks no english at all…damn her

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Also I want to learn more about Panama. Every panamaniac I met has been dark skinned black person. Is panama chocolate country or are they kicking out all the darkies?

17 06 2008
Landon

Panama hs a lot of dark people so does costa rica and venezuela

17 06 2008
B4Prez

@Landon – U took the words right out of my mouth. That island has insane race relations. And the dictator sure was successful in breeding that race hate. Its crazy how they view complexion. But like I said, black americans can’t even accept dark skin as attractive.

17 06 2008
Omar

I wouldn’t get too high and mighty about Latinos who don’t want to be considered black because it wasn’t to long ago African Americans didn’t want to be called black and some still don’t(Tiger Woods and Vin Diesel). We had entire movements so that SOME black people would accept themselves and we take it for granted that the same movements didn’t happen in other places like things were always the way they are.

17 06 2008
Knatural

Look, there’s Africans and Chinese EVERYWHERE. No exaggeration. Where there’s water, work, and women, they’ll be there damnit.

17 06 2008
Landon

brown skin short hair or dreads will always do it for me…
\
but youa re right we just started realizing that black is beauitful. its sad how they made us hate our selves…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

in Puerto rico if you are darker skinned you are uneducated and poor if you are lightskinned you are educated and rich…kinda like the US..it sucks but its true…My grandfather was lightskinned my grandmother is dark skinned and they caught hell raising my oldest unlce and that when they moved to the US

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

B4Prez: It’s so weird that black people in America have such an issue with finding darker skin attractive. I grew up and went to school with craploads of white kids and very few black kids so all of us black kids were the same in their eyes whether we were super dark or super light. Still black.

I was never around the black kids at my schools because (sadly) I was in the Honors and AP classes and there were about 3 of us altogether. I wasn’t exposed to this insanity about a skin color being “trendy” until I went to college and met my now ex-boyfriend who was talking about some girl he used to see telling him that she didn’t really want him because dark skinned men were “in” and light skinned guys were “out”.

How in the hell is a skin color trendy?

17 06 2008
datswhatsup

need….daily….infusion…..of….anger……
anger….fading….
smile….emerging…..
aaaaagggghhh!

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Costa Rica does not. I just went there and did a lot of research before I left. It does have a nearly all black area, like having a black English speaking state (South Carolina=Limon) full of caribbeans but most Ticos are fair, though mixed. And they aren’t fond of the darkies down their either. Found out first hand and through some enlightening conversations.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ok lets put it this way.. there are darker ppl everywhere in the world.. has anyone ever seena dark skinned asian guy not that pale yellow we always see at the carry out but a tanned motha fucka.. he was on Ninja Warrior his name was Kane and his brother was Shane(nerd) they can tan like shit and looked like some asian mexicans hahah

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea, the racial revolution which was a long time coming, and had many fits and starts i think is just starting to get hold in Brazil. Or so some documentaries and professors have fooled me into thinking. But its crazy how deeply ingrained this racial hierachy brainwashing is around the globe. Its a struggle.

17 06 2008
Omar

@Landon – I’ve seen it in some places and read about it in others, that doesn’t change the fact that they consider themselves Hispanic the same way you consider yourself an American. Black people caught hell in America too but they for the most part still considered themselves Americans.

Shit my people weren’t allowed out of their small section of Costa Rica for generations until a revolution happened around the 1950s.

You ain’t kidding about the City of God that place is more dangerous than Baghdad and has been for a long time, but it gets no media attention and they have people thinking all of Brazil is paradise.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Am I the only one that tend to find dark skinned chinese men sexy… Not necessary vietnamese who are mostly darker but cambodians, filipinos (though I count them as black too. the filipinio filipinos, chinese filipinos must apply for negro passports) and darkskinned chinese are on the side of good looking. Like that boy from crouching tiger. My partner in crime was all over some chow yun fat but i was looking at that youngun.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

Exactly. They like to say lightskin was ‘in’ in the 80s, and they went out n darkskin came ‘in’ in the 90’s. However, this exclusively applied to men. Drk-skinned women are still waitin for the day when they can be pretty without being ‘pretty for a dark-skinned girl’.

And even still, us dark brothas might be more accepted, but lite skin and curly hair is still the holy grail to alot of sistas.

But what can u say, while our ‘talented tenth’ who were supposed to be helping to educate us were running around putting paper bags next to ppls faces, dark-skinned ppl were running around trying to find that darker person to make fun of to get the brunt off of them. SMH

17 06 2008
Landon

I will say this, i spent some time in Brazil and i thought it was cool. However, just like other places i have travled to in this world being a Black American has its advantages. Its kind of sad but they only image they have of Black Americans is what they see on TV… esp true in Asia.

If they see you overseas or in brazil or evern parts of Mexico (Oaxaca where i studied abroad) we were like a circus act. People would take pictures with us, my home girl had micro braids and people would come up and touch her hair. Give us their babies to take pictures, it was crazy. They thought we were celeberties. In Brazil there would be 100s of people on the line to get in the club. I go up speaking english they would let me right in. But the dark skin brazilians could barely get in… Its so weird.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Ahh Omar, forgot you said you were a tico. Whats really good down there? have you been? Its great for tourism but damn i hate going on vacation where people look at me funny all day or treat me like i’m second hand. My money’s just as green as everyone elses. Or I guess rainbow colored pastel down there.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Like what get’s me is they have these models from brazil like Giesele who looks white to me with an accent aint what regualr brazilian girls look like

What brazilian looks like!

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Oh my gosh, Landon reminds me of the time I went to Walt Disney World with my dad and step mom and sisters. My sisters and I had braids (this was like, maybe 1992) and Asian tourists would literally stare at us and ask us to take pictures with them holding up our hair. The Disney characters played with our hair as well, we’ve got it on video somewhere-Minnie Mouse throwing it up and then “giggling” and then tossing it up again. It’s amazing how many people (whites, other black people and especially Asians) were just dumbfounded over braids.

17 06 2008
Landon

SEE its either light skin or dark skin what about the brown skin brothers such as my self? ???

we get forgotten about. brown skin brothers are like navy blue suits, we are acceptable for any situation, interview, funeral party but never the in thing…

its either cream suits or black suits… never the classic navy blue… i am tired of this shit.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea I didn’t get so much the celebrity treatment down there so much as the damn, you some kind of alien? But I don’t like going places like that, esp having my hair natural, b/c people think that if you walk around down there like you’re normal you must be some sort of sideshow act and they can touch you and stare and talk about your ass like a clown.
Same thing when I go to Asian enclaves here in the states. Although it seems all asian women over age 25 love me. Especially if they are very small, very old, or overweight. But they seem to think its a complement to say ‘you so biiiiiiig!’ (I’m 5’10”)or ‘you so much hair!’ and giggle uncontrollably which is problematic. I need to learn mandarin or cantonese.

17 06 2008
Knatural

And even still, us dark brothas might be more accepted, but lite skin and curly hair is still the holy grail to alot of sistas.
AAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA so sad
Personally, I marvel at dark skin, it’s so smooth and rich! Wait, that’s chocolate. Damn you Berpha!
WNBT – Darker-skinned Asian (some) are sexy. But they don’t want my black-ass.

17 06 2008
Knatural

@ Landon – huh?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I liek brown brothas too for the record even thought the person i happened to fall in love with is light skinned hahha

dont hurt me when i say this but i never really been in to those blue,black dudes..i stick to dark brown, brown, medium, light brown

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

LOL Knat. I’m “brown” as well…sorta on the yellow side of brown so I’m acceptable to all black males without them seeming like they prefer light skinned girls.

My sisters on the other hand, are so light that I’ve mistaken them for white girls on occasion (they HATE that with a passion) and black guys don’t want them at all.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

singlenappeen, I seen your pictures. You may walk over to the darkskinned section if you please. You a light darkie, but Uncle Rukus says you a darkie all the same. (my brothers a dark lightbright but he’s a lightbright all the same).

i consider myself almost exact medium and thus the arbirter of all shades of color. Mrs Epps, is a light medium. Tomatohead is dark lightbright, Muse a dark medium. And you sir I believe are darker than Muse. I apologize to both of you for putting you in the same sentence.

Actually today i’m having an ego day. I will now consider myself arbiter of all thngs. My word is final.

17 06 2008
Muse

Landon once again you are making baseless comments as if you know me. First of all my family on my dad’s side is from the Caribbean so I’m very knowable about the racial identity issues that go on. Secondly, you have no idea who my people are or the fact that I could have dated a PR or Dominican person before. Nevertheless keep talking out of your ass because I’m amused.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

I love blue black dudes. They usually have really clear skin and really dark eyes. Their skin looks fabulous naked. 😛

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

wait, what’s a lightbright?

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

You know i have a fetish for the dark brothers, love shades of red and gold hair on black men (only light brights seem to have) but every single guy I’ve been with has somehow ended up almost the exact same color as me. very odd. I was just remarking this to my current infatuation that we have the same damn skin color. I wanted to sing that India Arie song.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Man if i were single..it would be like Stella got her groove on instead of getting it back..i’ll take one of these…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

well dave chappelle got one side of my my family calling people brotha darkness so I instigated the other side to people brother brightness. but lightbrite caught on so thats my unPC term for lightskinned people. Would you prefer mullato or quadroon?

17 06 2008
Knatural

Me too TomatoHead, luckily I never had any of those “light-skinned, dark-skinned” issue. I fall squarely midway on the Black folk color scale. And super blue black, fresh from the Sudan is beautiful. It’s so smooove. Downside: can’t see ’em in dimly lit areas unless they smile. Cheeeesse!

Ohhhh, remember that toy Lite Brite! I love-ded that thing.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

What ya’ll think Kimora Lee and Djimon’s baby is gonna look like? Its gonna be one extreme or the other. No in between. Russell’s babies are gorgeous

17 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

You might have dated on or two… I live in NYC where there are more Domincans and Ricans than in thier own country. I went to High School in the BX… I well acquainted with the Latino people. It does not help my last name sounds latino so people always think i am Domincan. I was not saying you didnt know anything Muse, i was going off my own observation of what i know and you brought that into conention. I was simply stating i lived in mexico for a lil while with a mexican family and i think it brought me some interesting insight on how latinos at least in this case mexicans view african americans and / or african mexicans.

this was not a MUSE vs Landon topic, it was simply debating something you said… it was not personal. SO why dont i buy you a 2 piece from popeyes and some honey butter biscuits from Churchs and work out this feud we have.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oooh you had to break out giveusfree. I went and saw that mediocre movie just for him. now you got me drooling on my job. If my computer breaks due to water damage the bill is going to your ass Mrs. Epps

17 06 2008
Knatural

I just kinda wet myself. Djimon “Why Is He With Kimora Lee” Hounsou. Thanks Mrs. Epps. I may go home early now and get some afternoon delight.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

LOL@ all of the brown shades. I’m not blue-black, but in my book, no one is gonna call me liteskinned, so I go to the dark side, lol.

And like I said, though many women still fall out at the sight of a lite n curly brotha, they all seem to love them dark when I’m around.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Thats cuz Russ is funny looking hobbit. 2 pretty people make some bugugly babies. I’m afraid giveusfree and babyphat will got the makings of bugugly. Thats why the cutest kids are the spawn of the 2 ugliest black people and white people mixed together. Some sort of karma.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol@ WNBT

ahha i guess i am light meduim..but shoot wait til i get a tan,,i’m be chocolately-delicious

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

You know I also don’t like being boxed in jsut because I find a lightbright attractive. Brothers give me hell if I mention it as if I am unable to also find brothers of other complexions attractive at the same time. Lord help you if you mention a white man is attractive near some militant Jamaican men.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Milk chocolate. Mrs. Epps.
b4prez, i will need a picture deposited for arbitration of your position on the color spectrum. Applications can be found on facebook.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahaha im happy to hear that my fellow Dijmon lovers enjoyed his pic as much as i do…sigh..he could get it

hahah yea ugly ppl make pretty ass kids.. and for some reaon when two pretty ppl make a kid its cute until they turn 6 and then its downhill from there…

Crosses fingers that when i pop out my 1st child she or he wont scare me ahhaha

17 06 2008
Knatural

Inspired by Zora Neale Hurston’s color scale, here’s mine (warning, extremely ignorant): milkbone, banana-face, red, Stacy Dash, brown-skinned, regular Black, burnt, Wesley Snipes, and African/Sudan Black.

17 06 2008
Angel30

@ Esquire: “Damn whoever posted the Wendy Williams link. DAMN YOU.
(pssst) I hate Bob Johnson”

Lol, Whhhyyy?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

is it me or does russ have a lisp…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

why do they call light skinned ppl red-bone..i never see the red they speak of.. i got red-ish brown skin…”i got indian in my family” right? ahhah

Chris please dont find me and scalp me after that comment

17 06 2008
B4Prez

@Willnot –

I’m gonna work that out, so that I can get my accurate location on the colored folks scale, lol

And btw, I hate Bob Johnson too!

17 06 2008
Landon

i thoguht iw as more of a toasted almond…

sorry Martin reference.

17 06 2008
Landon

awww yeah barry white on my pandora…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Shuddup Mrs. Epps. That is understatement of the week. Does russ have a lispy. That lispy mothafucka has drool caught between his teeth that has better enunciation than him. And he stutters. Surprisingly good businessman for someone you know has to spit when he talks. Except for the whole blood diamonds thing which i probably wont forgive him for. Plus some other political nonsense.

17 06 2008
Omar

@WNBT – I have been to Costa Rica once I liked I did the tourist thing in San Jose for a few days then I went to Puerto Limon (the capital of Limon), I stayed with a friend of my aunts. I like it there, but I guess they expect tourists to be white, it’s a shame that stereotypes about black people aren’t confined to the US. But some people are nice it just depends on who you are dealing with.

Limon being mostly black is like having black neighborhoods here after segregation. They had segregation there but when it ended everybody wasn’t all ready to jump ship. Limon is a little run down but there are nice people there and there are poor people other than black people too. There are shanty towns with all lighter skin ticos right outside San Jose. I also once wondered into the wrong neighborhood in San Jose and saw a whole bunch of people lined up sitting on the curb “shootin up”. I guess people everywhere got problems.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

you put that toaster up to 6 didnt you… 🙂 All in love, but you know all turnyknobby things lie. Shower heads and toasters are the top 2 but volume knobs also lie.

I wish black people knew Eddie Izzard.

s’funny many of the dark skin people i know have beautiful red undertones, I wish I had red undertones. Mine are orangey, sad, I’m always so close yet so far away. Orange undertones and just short of 6′ tall. le sigh

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOOOOOO@ WNBT…i so sorry..as Landon would say ahahah

17 06 2008
Knatural

Um, they’re making a film version of the video game God of War and Djimon Hounsou has been asked to star as Kratos? Please, I hope they go through with it. A shirtless, gods-killing Black Kratos, I’d go see it.

17 06 2008
Grimm

I havent been on the internet in so long so im a bit disappointed to find that when i finally have time to surf the net there is nothing to read today. I guess all of the old stuff thats been going on for the last month will have to suffice…
@ ms epps- i know im so late but i dont understand how you can “understand” dominicans/puerto ricans being offended when they are called black when everyone knows that latino/hispanic/spanish ARE NOT RACES. They are ethnicities/a nationality. That means that if you look black its because you ARE black. And if you look native or european its because you ARE.
Just because you speak spanish you are not any less black than a black american who is enevitably mixed as well but speaks english. Its a cultural difference, not a racial one.
I hate the way that black people who cannot “pass” are treated in latin america when the drums/music, customs, dances, etc of many latin american countries are influenced by the africans who got there when the spanish did. Africa as big of a component of what it means to be latino/hispanic/”spanish” as the native american and spanish are. Bachata anyone?
People should be proud of EVERYTHING they are, even if its only 18%. Thats why i hate it so much. You can be a dark as night but just because you “look” black why deny the 30% someplace in europe or the 12% native american? That isnt right. Especially when they walk down the street saying (i normally dont use language like this. sorry God) “nigga”, wearing cornrows and Sean John, and listening to an ipod filled with “black” music.
Even though im i touch with my heritage etc I never pretend im not black just because i didnt grow up in the stereotypical black american culture, look the way i do or because i can speak another language. Ill rep all day that im creole but when it comes time to check that race box i know im black.
Sorry to go off on a tangent so late but that is the one thing that has bugged me since i came to NYC. I see people all day who look like my cousin/father/sister but will argue me up and down about being black because theyre “spanish”.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

HAHAHAHA @ Orange undertones

17 06 2008
Ms. Kristine

Amazing–Chris you don’t need a project for this site….just allow folks to post comments….a blank post made by you will probably generate about 700 comments! Simply Amazing!!!

Special project…to ellipses, to Chuck Norris, (who knows what happened when I went to do some work) came back and Puerto Ricans are black and now the brown paper bag test is taking place!

AMAZING!

Chris you are truly the man!

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea San Jose was interesting. we actually stayed outside in the suburbs and then had a couple of unexpected bus tours (being I was the only one in the group that knew a little spanglish and I lost my voice for most of the trip) and I was surprised by how very few black people were anywhere near san jose. All the rich and the poor seemed to be fair skinned. And most of the black people we saw seemed to be tourists, not locals. We didn’t get over to Limon even though we tried b.c. the roads were washed out and it was going to be some 6hr journey on the backroads. But i did go rafting in the rain and that was hella fun. I want to go back just to do that again. And I got some soursop so that made up for the extreme lack of flirting that i normally enjoy on vacations.

17 06 2008
Vanita

Well Im am dark chocolate, 70% cacao…mmm chocolate…

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Russell Simmons sounds like Elmer Fudd

17 06 2008
Dustin

I love that “Stacey Dash” and “Wesley Snipes” are skin tones.

I love that the convo inevitably goes back to Landon’s crotch area (I’ll leave that alone . . . for now).

I hate that Chris is keeping us in suspense. Perhaps he’s developing some psychological test to incite hatred in all of us by not posting. Said test will result in a book deal. And untold dates with oddly-confident Asian women.

17 06 2008
Vanita

When I went to Rome, alot of people were trying to guess where I was from. I got Brazillian, Dominican, and African (even the africans thought I was african) but when I told them I was American (im actually a Trini-Guyanese mix, but didnt feel like explainin that) they flipped out. Like, REALLY Truly American?! They wanted to give me hugs, and began to admire me…
I’ve always just chalked that up to them not seeing African Americans in Person, only on TV. And when I went to Jamaica, they were pretty happy to see me. I honesly think it made them proud to see someone who looked like them. And they gave me THE BEST drinks…boy the YTs was MAD because I was ALWAYS double fisting…

17 06 2008
Knatural

Sad to say, but if Russell Simmons wasn’t rich, he probably wouldn’t have pulled Kimora.
Grimm – I’m glad you know you’re Black; unfortunately in the States it boils down to checking a box, picking a side. We aren’t as “nationality” driven, we’re color driven.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Vanita – how long ago did you go to Rome. American’s haven’t been getting international love like that since Bush has been in office.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Whatever! I think Russell is way to smart for Kimora’s no class ass. Kinda how I feel about Jay and Beyonce. ducks behind desk for the onslaught

17 06 2008
Landon

i am surprised Morris Chesnut / Gabby Union was not a complexion…

i love me some Miss Union, ahaahahah day dreaming

17 06 2008
Dustin

Gasp! If I were wearing pearls, I’d be clutching them right now. I LOVE Beyonce!

17 06 2008
Landon

natural (20:35:25) :

Sad to say, but if Russell Simmons wasn’t rich, he probably wouldn’t have pulled Kimora.

umm lets make that a Theory, Sceintific fact and proven without a doubt if Russle wasnt rich that he wouldn’t have pulled kamora… WHat people dont talk about is the fact he started messing with her when she was like 16 or 17 and he was a grown ass man. But he knows how to put htat woman in check though, its hillarious.

Plus she is a lipstick lesbian on the side, big time.

17 06 2008
Knatural

Inspired by Zora Neale Hurston’s color scale, here’s mine (warning, extremely ignorant): milkbone, banana-face, red, Stacy Dash, brown-skinned, regular Black, burnt, Wesley Snipes, and African/Sudan Black.

Gabrielle Union is regular black. Duh!

17 06 2008
Vanita

Yonnie: 05! Bush was in office! I guess I just so damn beautiful. J/K. I only got a faw ‘fuck Bush’ insults when I was with my class. Otherwise, they pretty much loved me. Again, I attest that to the fact they didnt believe I was american. People asked me if I knew 50 cent, but they meant as in was he my brother (because if your a black american, your brother has to be 50 cent because ‘regular’ black folks cant afford such extragavance)

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea Vanita, thats why I like vacationingn in the caribbean. They are so happy to see black tourists taht you get all sorts of special treats. And then of course the promiscuous caribbean men who will buy you drinks, hook you up with jewelry or food they are hocking and then stalk you for the rest of your trip. Depending on your length of stay and the lies you tell you could get some good deals. 🙂 And find out where the real parties are.

Oh we acted like straight groupies for this house band in barbados in the YT touristy section. But there were 3 hot guys in the group and they were so happy to see young black females there they dedicated every song to us. They were singing at us directly and everything. Taking off their shirts. This one older 2520 woman was standing close to us and thought for a good 30 minutes that mr. loins of apollo (you know that muscle i’m talking about, droolworthy) was singing to her and was all excited. Then she realized he was focused on me and was all sad, but later she bucked up and was like you girls are the luckies girls in the room. Damn skippy! I’m gonna act like I”m blind and rub up on that chest. Unfortunately we didnt’ lie well enough and the waiter who was giving us free drinks down the street got off work and stalked us out and then cockblocked the rest of the night with his jerky friend.

17 06 2008
Dustin

I love Gabby Union too. So much so, that it doesn’t even bother me that she has no range and plays every character the same. At least she can play that character well.

17 06 2008
Knatural

HAHA, Dustin likes pearl necklaces! Wait, I went too far. Landon, I stand by my opinion. There is a such thing as a teenage golddigger.

17 06 2008
Landon

i am agreeign with you… i am saying its not even a question…

If russle had my salary he would not have dated her its just that simple…

she wouldnt give a damn how much i contribute to my 401k, lol.

17 06 2008
Dustin

Dammit, I didn’t even catch that I was opening myself up for such a reference. Touche, Knat!

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

OH yea, thats the best thing about being black and american. You don’t have to travel the world pretending you’re canadian. People don’t blame you for America’s problems, they think we’re victims too. However you gotta watch out for the militants, they will hem you up all day trying to talk to you about the evil america and how you must be supporting them too since all that america did to black people. Then they ask if you know any native americans and how we should join together and kick YTs ass. I’m like I’m glad you gotta plan for the revolution, never thought of that, lemme grab the last 2 indians and take on the white house but i was wondering if i could actually pay for these earrings I’ve been holding for twenty minutes and drink my apple soda first please.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Aww I love dustin. I’m thinking of changing my inner gay man’s name to dustin in honor of you. Plus I keep trying to tell him that Patrice is a female’s name and no one is going to know he’s a gayman.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

Yea, Gabby Union is hot….and the token ‘dark-skinned’ woman in Hollywood.

As for Beyonce…maybe home schooling wasn’t the best idea….

17 06 2008
Muse

OMG GRIMM IS BACK! LOL

BTW I’m milk chocolate!

17 06 2008
Landon

i just think beyonce needs to let the weave go… i would love to see her with a short hair cut or her own hair…

i am tired of horses running around bald because she wants 25 different hairs styles for her a tour?

but knowing her she has some sweat shop where she has children growing thier hair out so she can get the silky number # 9 weave just right…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Muse I have cast you as dark medium. You are milk chocolate is a deceptive term. We shall call you hershey bar brown. You may not appeal, my word is final.

Oh I have to come up with an all edible color spectrum…. thinking

17 06 2008
Landon

If Barack is elected i hope he outlaws weaves, lol….

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

WNBT – Inner gay man? Please explain.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

Yea…Beyonce has the ‘wig crypt’. Supposedly that’s where Solange, the baby, Kelly, and Michelle work, lol.

And for short hair…not until white women start wearing short hair will black women start wearing it. If you notice, trying to be a mainstream female star means trying to look as white as possible. Not to mention, all of a sudden having lots of white celeb friends, and wearing labels that cost more than the avg black person’s salary.

17 06 2008

BEYUNCEES REAL HAIR :

17 06 2008
Muse

Last time i check this is what a milk chocolate bar looks like….

http://www.groovycandies.com/sendbinary.asp?path=D%3A%5Cwwwroot%5Cgroovycandies.com%5Cuploadmedia%5Cimages%5C3902L.jpg&Width=450

So am I really being deceptive?

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I thought Wu-Tang already came up with an edible color spectrum.

17 06 2008
Muse

Inf act that chocolate bar matches my skin color perfectly if you mix some red and yellow undertones.

17 06 2008
Grimm

@ Landon. I just wanted to point out that Beyonce dos wear he real hair out from time to time, it doeas have to rest. And also, even Rihanna has a weave and she has a short cut. Her bob was a weave and even now her bangs are a weave. he was even on the cover of a magazine with her track showing. Weaves arent going anywhere. I love it when someone put one on my head!

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

peaches, #2 toast, butter rum, peanut butter, caramel, pecan, panacakes and waffles, tea, hot cocoa, hershey bar, chocolate milk (hmm thats a little ashy), godiva, Mrs buttersworth, licorice

Mrs, buttersworth is a beautiful color. Giveusfree is mrs. buttersworth. I need more foods to fill this out. Debra said she wont give me any more suggestions until I giver her a Werthers original. Ooh that should be in there… oh wait i already have caramel and thats basically the same.

17 06 2008
Dustin

The problem with B’s (yes, we’re tight to so I get to call her “B”) weave is that it’s too much. It’s so big and long and silky. Obvious! Drag queens see her and go “Oh girl, tone it down some!”

Willnotbetelevised, thanks for the compliment. Patrice is too much.

17 06 2008
Muse

Ne that is not Beyonce’s real hair. She is wearing pieces. The lady who does my hair also does Megan Goode, Beyonce’s (sometimes), and Garbelle Unions. She told me that photo Beyonce has pieces in her hair. Sorry to disappoint.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I’mma need ya’ll to stop calling my man Giveusfree. He has a name dammit!!

17 06 2008
Vanita

WNBT–LMBO @ your story…Too funny!!! You gotta have Dark Chocolate, Extra Dark (70% Cacao like me) and espresso (the real kind, no milk) on the edible color spectrum…

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Didn’t somebody post a pic of Beyonce’s real hair last week? Somebody was in the background looking at her like she was all crazy…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yes but you know there are black people who like to say i’m chocolate, when they are lighter than a hershey bar, and then you call them out and they go well i’m milk chocholate. Or there’s the term i’m chocolate with a little milk splashed in, which can be a range of colors from actual milk chocolate to lightbright. So milk chocolate, though it should be the color of a hershey bar, has been corrupted by liars.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k
17 06 2008

You aren’t disappointing me at all, what beyonce eats don’t make me shit! Alls I’m saying is the girl ain’t bald.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

WHoa wait a sec where the fuck did Grimm come from..here we go again…you ask me how i can understand when DR and PR get offended..bitch I am puerto rican…can you not read?

“Just because you speak spanish you are not any less black than a black american who is enevitably mixed as well but speaks english”

When did i ever say that in my statement…I am proud of my BLACK AND PUERTO RICAN SIDE.. are you brain dead child?

read again boo…

When it comes down to checking a box i check African American even though i am Black Puerto rican..dont get your shit twised..

What makes me laugh out loud is how you gonna come at me for talking about DR and PR struggles…when i have witnessed it 1st hand… so like i said go read a book and when you get your facts straight lets chat.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

LMAO@ Jay n Bey’s daughter…I would leave that baby right at the hospital

17 06 2008
Landon

side bar – why does Badu’s Men always end up crazy for a little while after dating her… ???

17 06 2008
Landon

umm those are fighting words on my BLOCK… Mrs. Epps… LOL

get the Vasoline out and put the earings away….

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Here’s the pic I was looking for. Beyonce’s real hair.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I don’t do coffee or almonds so those wont be on my spectrum, nor any derivatives unless i don’t like you. And godiva is dark chocolate.

Cousin, I have a bunch of inner personalities and my 2 strongest are my inner fat girl Debra and my inner gayman Patrice/Dustin. My inner gayman loves fleet week. My outer woman sometimes yells at my innergayman that he has whorish tendencies. My inner gayman tells her to STFU and live. My inner gayman is excellent on vacation. Patrice was flirting with loins of apollo all night, and giving that 2520 smug looks. Patrice also gets most of my free drinks. Patrice is a bit too fierce some days.

17 06 2008
B4Prez

They say Badu’s stuff will convert u to Baduism…n that sht don’t even exist!

17 06 2008
Dustin

Why did the pic of their daughter look exactly like someone I know? Oh sh*t.

17 06 2008
Vanita

Thats because people want to be called dark with out actually looking it. Nobody, even YTs like to be called pale…And that the REAL complex when talkin about skin color. People will go on and on about how they wanna be dark, how they love dark people, but as soon as they ass is in the sun for too long they screamin “uh UHHH! Yall tryna get my burnt crispy black out here?!”
Act like you never heard it before!

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Yonnie that was me posting beyonce real hair hahah and the dude in the back giving her the stank eye

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

For many a year I called him giveusfree b.c. i didn’t know his name and then later b.c. i didn’t know how to pronounce it (hadn’t heard it said aloud yet). And now, he will always be giveusfree to me until he stars in a more powerful role. Then he shall be the name of that character.

17 06 2008
Dustin

I love Patrice/Dustin. My inner gay man is named Brendan and he’s why I’m hungry right now. Bertha (inner fat girl) is about to sit on him and eat some chips. (I hope not. But that bitch is strong.)

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Lub me some badu but that woman got crazy in her eye. And she must got crazy in her kitten too cuz exes are dizzy for a good while after her.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Some fraganackle bull! http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/17/dogfighting.sentence.ap/index.html

Mess with dogs – 13 years
Mess with little black girls – NAACP Image Award

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Dustin you have an inner gayman and an outer gay man? You’re like a whole gaggle of gay in one go. lovely

17 06 2008
Sylph

http://www.mediatakeout.com/Exclusives/Beyonce_Weave.html

Those are some shots of her without the lacefront.

Dark caramel over here. 😉

17 06 2008
Grimm

Girl you should honestly learn to speak in a more eloquent and lady like fashion. Everyone knows what you are and i read your statement. Had you passed the reading and comprehension portions of the tests at your local adult school you would have understood that my gripe was about the collective behavior of members of that community who look like me and deny having african blood when they do. Perhaps you should read a book, or scroll back up before you misconstrue what I said in my message that was partially directed at what you said, however not directed entiely at you. And for the record if you are a black PR that makes your nationality PR american and your race black. You live in the states no? So checking the black/african american box IS correct. All blacks are of african descent no matter what country they were born in. Where do you think they came from?

17 06 2008
B4Prez

E. Badu is a lil ‘touched’. Did yall see the youtrube clip where they asked her what advice she had for young ppl entering the industry, and she said:

‘Do some hoe sh*t’

lol…i’m gonna hold a prayer circle for her…donations accepted..

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon ahhaha man im just saying though..she act like i said i wasnt black..fuck outta here with that bullshit..she tryna act like she know every goddammn thing about “spanish” ppl…which i hate that term Spanish=Spain..Latino is Latin America..get it correct…and she wanna school me on Latino heritage saying it originated from Africa NO SHIT hence the word BLACK PUERTO RICAN!!!!!!

rolls eyes..

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

you should honestly learn to speak in a more eloquent and lady like fashion

I have afeeling that Grimm is gonna find out the hard way that Chris will ban anyone that deems themselves the “moral compass” of SBPH

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Don’t compliment Patrice, Dustin, Patrice is a terrible flirt. He’s fluttered his eyes when I read that to him. Patrice wants me to get a wig and a fake name in october and go teach all the young sailors with their pockets full of months backpay and their eyes full of stars something they wont forget in a hurry. He even told me I should take off school for a week to do it and claim it was a holiday. Thats why I only let him out when on vacation or at the club, and sometimes on free weekends. Every time he goes shopping, i have to return things the next week or not eat for a month. Patrice doesn’t mind starving but Debra gets pissed

17 06 2008
Landon

oH shIT…

i HEAR mRS. ePPS GETTING HER rOSIE pEREZ vOICE gOING… MOOKIE…. MOOKIE….

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

There’s no moral compass at the north pole.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

and you know she got a razorblade under her tongue too. Watch out grimm, she’ll cut your lace front out.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Grimm sweetheart…the 1st thing you did wrong was tell me how I should speak..wrong way to get heard out and get ignored.

“Had you passed the reading and comprehension portions of the tests at your local adult school”

Was this your way of insulting my intelligence? Girl kick rocks…

“my gripe was about the collective behavior of members of that community who look like me and deny having african blood when they do”

what was the point of you directing this to me and what i mean by this is, by typing my name in the same sentence to me? When I never denied my african blood. I actually said the same thing you did if you read my comments correctly. I said that all puerto ricans are black. I think you are confused sweetie.

17 06 2008
Grimm

@mrepps- Girl well maybe you should roll those eyes over a book until your smart enough to know better than to say something such as “When it comes down to checking a box i check African American even though i am Black Puerto rican..”, when you live in the US and we all know how aficans got to this hemisphere. I wont even go into how stupid that sounds…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

by the way Nationality is based on where you were born so your worng…

17 06 2008
Dustin

WNBT, “. . . gaggle of gay.” I love it!

Patrice sounds like someone I’d like to party with. Until he took my man and stole my credit card. God, the gays are dramatic.

Fleet week = lose my mind. I wish I lived in NYC. Anywhere in a blue state would be awesome.

17 06 2008
SOMALI QUEEN

Hmmm, someone sounds insecure about their roots looool

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Bethany made her way to McDonald’s during my lunch break but thankfully reeled herself in and had a 6 piece chicken nuggets, fries and a Sprite.

My inner gay man’s name is Gareth. He’s Scottish.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Grimm go hit the runway like the good little creole model you are… Ieave the reading and the adult stuff to us.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

OH HELL NAW!!! WTF. Somali Serf – you at a computer lab??!!

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Oh yea Grimm btw i liek to be known as Black Puerto Rican as you liek to known as Creole..whats the diff? nothing.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

HAHHAHAHAHA. I think Somali Cunt has found her way to the public library!

17 06 2008
Grimm

mrepps-Oh? So if i was born in mexico but moved to the US am I a black mexican or a mexican american? think about it….
Or if i was born in the US but my parents are from china am i a black chinese person or am i chinese american? In the US you are ________ American and you are one of several races: Black, White, Asian, Native, pacific islander… So no matter my race, if i live in the US i am (fill in the country i came from) AMERICAN… because i live in AMERICA…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol@ Somali..not confused at all if you were talking about me…I know who i am as for Grimm I dont think she knows from adam..just my opinion..

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Aw shyt….yonnie, dustin, WNBT…I think we got ourselves a show. I’ll get the dibs!

17 06 2008
Dustin

It’s about to be a . . . what? Girlfight!

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

LOL! Girlfight! I get the lost earrings!

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I don’t fight….I don’t argue….I just beat that b$#%! with a bottle

17 06 2008
SOMALI QUEEN

T-Head…what’s your fascination with private parts? Were you molested as a child and you decided to take ownership of your nasty? Don’t bother answering — think about it cause I’m not going to respond to you anymore.
Your nasty mouth makes me sick.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

if you were born in Mexico your a mexican… if you moved to the US fine call your self Mexican American if you wish but your still a fucking mexican.thats your nationality your race is hispanic..what are you talking about?

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Somali, go get a hand mirror, get to know yourself a little, and calm down

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

im sorry ya’ll but i missed Somali funny self.. now the comment section today is way more funnier 🙂

17 06 2008
SOMALI QUEEN

Yonnie — what you need to do is go get a bible and have a talk with your priest. You have sinned child.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Yes, I’ve been attacked by Somali Cooter and it’s been suggested that I was molested as a child!

FYI, no I was not, thank goodness. I just think the words cunt, cooter and pussy are funny.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damn you know they kick you out of the library if you vomit on the computers. You should head on on over to another site.

Dustin don’t forget to pick up the weave, thats taht $300 hawaiin silky, someone can sew it back in after they wash the blood off.

Also for information sake. A group of young gay men is officially a gaggle. Like a murder of crows or a herd of hos. Old gays are a garggle.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Sorry I meant TomatoHead, but Dustin you can have the tracks if you want. (btw there is a fancypants weave shop in maplewood, NJ called Traxx).

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

TH, get me some raisinets. Good to throw and good to eat.

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I’m very familiar with my bible and no where in it does it say that it is a sin to look at your body. In fact, you’re probably committing the sin by deeming part of God’s creation as “dirty”

17 06 2008
shabooty

is it a sin to get shit in one’s dick-slit?

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Shabooty: I would guess so.

WNBT: And Goobers. Malt balls explode upon impact and therefore would be a hilarious sight.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

eww shabooty..maybe you should have waiting til after she took a shit, took a shower and all that jazz to put it in the stink…

btw i think anal is gross…why would you want to put your dick in a hole you know some shits out off..eww…ppl say ti feels like a tight pussy but fuck that!…and to you women who do anal..do you take more loose shits than before you tried anal lol just curious lmao…

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

my movie candy choices:
-sour patch kids
-raisinettes
-reeses pieces
-gummy bears

yum..Bonita getting hungry now lol

17 06 2008
Yonnie3k

And I think we are now officially in the gutter and I now have to get off of this site in case my job’s firewall triggers the authorities for words and phrases like anal and “loose shits”. Thanks alot SHABOOTY and MRS EPPS!!! I hope you’re happy!!

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAO SORRYYYYYY YONNIE

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

My girl warned me off anal unless i had access to a toilet the next day. She said he blew her o-ring out and she lost all kinds of sphincter control for a day or 2. But i don’t know if that’s typical

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

NM. I’m tripping. Goobers are chocolate covered peanuts. They would hurt more I guess. What I’m thinking of are Whoppers.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

heck cousin, if you’re firewall hasn’t kicked you off with shabooty’s other comments (including the classic gyro commment) then it aint gonna kick you off now. Reeses pieces are good to throw too, by the handful.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

HAHAHAHHAHAHA omg my god WNBT. Blew her o-ring out??? What does that even mean?

By the way, anal is not that bad. And you do typically have loose stools the day after, but it’s not like they come oozing out like you’ve been eating Olestra for a month, its more like you took a stool softener. Not that i would now…

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

TH, Bethany schooled you about your mistake didn’t she?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

yea WNBT..my friend said the same…and i would even dream of trying it anyway EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR gag..

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

And for guys it is like a super-tight cooter and they like that there isn’t as much lubrication-a bit more friction, if you will.

Again, not that i would know…

17 06 2008
Dustin

1. Good, I wanted the tracks. I’m mad at “Traxx.”

2. I always used “gaggle” for a group of blondes. E.g.: After my dad’s first wife (my mom) he exclusively married white women. His ex wives’ club is a gaggle of blondes.

3. That shit does not feel like a pussy. It hurts (because my penis is inccredibly thick).

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Reeses pieces are good to throw too, by the handful.

psh Bonita would beat me if i wasted reeses like that hahaha

hmm TH sounds liek you have experince to me hmmmmmmmmm

lol

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

LOL. Bethany was like, we’re eating them regular Lays bitch, I’m making you a fat girl on the outside! bwa ha ha

(bethany has an evil laugh similar to, but in higher pitch than, Jabba the Hutt)

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

wait i thought Dustin was gay…or do you still like the puss?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

jabba the HUT OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

17 06 2008
Angry IV
17 06 2008
Grimm

Oh mrepps SMH… hispanic is not a race. You seem to be a bit off. Youre mad arent you hun? its ok girl. Where do you live? Theres a great church in NYC called journeys and they can help you calm youre testosterone infused bouts of anger with counseling and such.

17 06 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHA OH GOD
“My inner gay man’s name is Gareth. He’s Scottish.”-TomatoHead
And Somali and Grimm, back together again.

17 06 2008
Dustin

Mrs. Epps, I’ve been there before. But never going “back.”

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Dustin, you are flirting again. I’m kinda mad that my current infatuation is chubby too. He can only fit magnums and I had a bunch of rough riders and other things but they were too small for him. But i’m not really complaining. 🙂

17 06 2008
Sylph

I hate you for that Angry. lol

17 06 2008
Dustin

Nice.

With whom am I flirting? Landon’s no longer here.

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

You know debra nearly cried and threw a temper tantrum in public because i bought her a big bag of reeses pieces and when she opened them they spilled all over the mall floor. i was just embarrassed and tried to run away before the custodians saw me. Plus debra’s mad when i throw any food.

17 06 2008
Knatural

Whoa whoa whoa, Dustin – how can YOU have an inner gay male…oh wait. And you guys started talking about anal? HAHAHAHAHAHAH
Angry – stop.

17 06 2008
Dustin

I have an inner gay male who’s a little more sterotypical than me. He’s bitchy and anorexic and works at J.Crew.

I have an inner black man too. His name is Dejamien and he, Brendan and Bertha had a fight today. I couldn’t decide whether or not to go to the gym during lunch, or to the barberhsop or to get fast food. Dejamien won and Brendan got 2nd place. I went and got an edge up and then came back to the office and had a lean cuisine. Bertha might go buck wild tonight and skip Body Pump.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LOl@ Grimm. me mad? never that, this is the INTERNET. Annoyed is the word i would use. Lets buff up your history shall we?

in the 70’s the US government defined the term “Hispanic” to identify Latin American individuals, and their descendants. And the US Census Bureau use this term as a race along with African American and Caucasian..

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I told you not to feed Patrice, Patrice doesn’t care that you and I would not get on. Patrice just like to hear about peen. Even gay peen (and you are bragging). Except for nappypeen, even singlenappeen.

btw, has anyone been to sister toldja’s blog and seen sir fabulous, her outer gayman? He’s really cute and I wish he played for my team. I’m jealous of her now. Again.

Ok I need to call my CI or go spend some quality time alone soon.

Nice to meet you Gareth.

17 06 2008
Dustin

Wait. What did your “. . . oh wait” imply? Ewww. You nasty.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

inner gay man and inner black man? WTFF AHAHAH

17 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

btw dustin, are you on the facebook? friend me
i swear i’m the only one who wants facebook to come up with an enemy me option too.

17 06 2008
Dustin

I just figured out what “peen” means. Okay, I’m leaving work and going to the gym (I think) . Holla.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Ah its quitting time see ya peeps..

17 06 2008

WHO LEFT THE GATE OPEN??????????????????????

Why would you come back after being banned?

17 06 2008
Knatural

Haha, Dustin you nasty *holds nose*

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Gareth says HELLLLLOOO LADIES!

Bethany says she’ll try to get me to go get one of those Mint Mocha Chip Frappucinos when I get off work.

I have an inner nigga named Treasure. She is a serious bitch and will pull weaves out should it come to it.

17 06 2008
Muse

Who the hell is Tomato and why is he/she talking about inner nigga? This better be a Black person or I’m e-kicking his/her ass!

17 06 2008
shabooty

ahaha my gyro comment def rox0red =)

and blew the o-ring out eh? nice
thats why some ex-pr0n stars gotta wear diapers cause their shitter is tore the f- up

17 06 2008
Muse

Shaboot is so gross. Anal is disgusting man. I never understood how men get into fucking someone where shit comes out. YUCK YUCK YUCK!

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

I am formerly NotBlonde. The reason behind the change of name is at the bottom of the Panda Bears comments section.

Knat was right…I really need to make that more apparent…

17 06 2008

“and blew the o-ring out eh? nice
thats why some ex-pr0n stars gotta wear diapers cause their shitter is tore the f- up”

((((((((((((((((((throwing up in my mouth))))))))))))))))))))))))))

17 06 2008
Angry IV

Might I add that I am eating some quite delicious watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew melon, grape, and pineapple salad currently. It is as if there is a fruit party in my mouth, and all of the sweetest ones are invited.

That wasn’t inherently gay.

17 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“I have afeeling that Grimm is gonna find out the hard way that Chris will ban anyone that deems themselves the “moral compass” of SBPH”

I don’t like the girl, but I can’t say she’s ever said/done anything to warrant a ban. Hell, she even made several comments today, none of which pissed me off.

Go figure.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

did i miss the gyro comment cuz im confused..oh yea im home now

17 06 2008

I’d love to give sweet party’s in someone’s mouth….

Did I say that aloud?

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

looks at Né…LMAOOOOOOOOOOO food went up my nose omg!

17 06 2008
Angry IV

Pineapple Tutorial

Now I really want some effing pineapple.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I have pineapple..nay-nay boo boo! lol

17 06 2008

lmaooo
I love pineapples and mango’s. My favorite fruit are strawberries, however I found out I was allergic last year.

17 06 2008
Knatural

Fuck you Angry!

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

btw if you dont know how to cut a pineapple then your dumber than rocks..just my opinion

17 06 2008
Merri Lee

Sorry I’m jumping in late with this Wendy Williams comment but I have a question. Is she really a man in drag or a transsexual? Is she an actual woman? Let me know. (I’m not an East Coaster)

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Né i love mango’s as well and Strawberries or my favorite fuit ever and Cherries come in 2nd. I actually havent found a fruit that i dont like…

Oh and one of my fave’s growing up was Plantains..yummy

17 06 2008
Angry IV

Fuck me? Nay, fucketh thee.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

How do you not know you’re allergic to something until you’re an adult?

17 06 2008
Angry IV

Well I supposed until I watched that video on proper cutting technique, I was less intelligent than stone.

17 06 2008
Merri Lee

Another side note, any one ever seen this?

17 06 2008

HEY HEY ANGRY, you are angry at the wrong person!!!! I love nectarines too!

17 06 2008
Angry IV

Ooooh, nectarines. Love them. They are good stuff. I love all fruits with the exception of fruits that are shitty, such as pears. Who the fuck wants to eat something that feels like sand?

17 06 2008

I hate the smell of pears.

17 06 2008
Angry IV

We really need to plan a get together over the 4th of July weekend. Is anyone opposed to a restaurant/bar locale in the DC Metro area? We could also just meet up at a Five Guys or Chipotle to eat and then go get shitfaced.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Merri Lee i believe she is a female.. She just wears to much make-up and fake ass wigs and has a raspy voice that gives the apperance as if she was a man in drag…just my opinion

17 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Aaah no, Angry I love pears! They’re one of the few fruits I like cooked as well.

Mmmm, I love most all fruits, although I’m pretty mundane in what I regularly buy. I have like an apple and a banana every day.

17 06 2008
The Doc Is In

You’re being too nice Mrs. Epps…it’s her APPEARANCE that gives the appearance of being a man in drag, LOL

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i love asian pears yummy

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

Peaches, by far, are the best fruit on the planet.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAO@ The Doc Is In..maybe your right…well the heffa looka like a man in drag..personally i have met and socialize with some pretty ass drag queens too..

HER BOOBS ARE FREAKIN JINORMOUS!

17 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Chipotle? Eeeeewwwwwww. That sits in your stomach like a spicy brick. Forget getting shitfaced afterwards, everyone will be too busy being shitassed.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

HAHAHHAH Doc is In. You know why? Because Chipotle is owned by Mcdonalds

17 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

In all probability, I’ll be at The Park that weekend getting irresponsibly hammered with one Tom Harkin (you’ll have to search the posts of yore to find his wonderful comments).

To find me, look for the tall guy double-fisting black russians and screaming at people in an Irish accent.

17 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I love, strawberries, grapes green and red, apples mostly granny smith’s,oranges, peaches, cherries,papaya, mango, bananas,plums,pears, plantains, kiwi, watermelon, honeydew, cantaloupe ect.

17 06 2008
TomatoHead

And plantains are disgusting. Blurgh.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Tom Harkin….bastard…but funny…probably fun to drink with…pass on the chipotle i have enough shit in my life lol…but i’ll take a drink or 2 ok maybe 5…lol jokes

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

GASP@And plantains are disgusting. Blurgh.

>:-O

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i hate black women who think blonde weave is cute..stop that shit.. and I’ve never been fond of red lipstick…

18 06 2008
The Doc Is In

*looking confused at Mrs. Epps link* Why that man put that horse in a wig and lipstick? That there ain’t right.

18 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Hate to get all racist…but white Russians are superior.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOOOOOO@ The Doc..Mister Ed’s sister right..

18 06 2008
Knatural

Crabcake sliders at The Park = nirvana. Seriously.
Best fruit in the universe = blackberries. For now.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I like both Black Russians and White..yummy…has anyone tried Bailey’s…i still wanna try it dammit..but whenever i go to the liquor store i always end up getting rum, tequila,vodka or gin..

18 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Oh heck yeah! I love creamy drinks. White Russians, Mudslides, Wet Pussy are some of my favs and the latter two have Baileys. Also Blowjob shots (hmmm, I’m starting to worry about myself…)

I’ve also been known to do some Irish Car Bombs from time to time (forgive me, during football season I hang out with white Philly transplants).

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Oh heck yeah! I love creamy drinks. White Russians, Mudslides, Wet Pussy are some of my favs and the latter two have Baileys. Also Blowjob shots (hmmm, I’m starting to worry about myself…

I’ve also been known to do some Irish Car Bombs from time to time (forgive me, during football season I hang out with white Philly transplants).

i think i found my new bestfriend…tear*

18 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Awwww…*raising a glass to my new friend Mrs. Epps*!

(….*then secretly tries to steal her glass when she looks away*…) LOL
Girl, I need you to hurry up and get legal so we can really hang! Or until then there’s always Mexico, ha ha.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol yea i got til November..thats the only thing that sucks about being born later in the year…sheet if my bday was in july we would have to make it a SPBH/Mrs.Epps bday bash lol

for the record i dare one of my friends steal my drink a heffa would get snatched up! ahahha im out for the night adios mi e-familia. the dog cant walk herself and dinner wont make its self either..

18 06 2008
TomatoHead

Knat: Blackberries are the shit. I ate two of those little clear boxes of them about a week ago. I can’t buy them because I’ll eat them all the same day and then want more

18 06 2008
Angry IV

The Doc Is In: it’s called a houseparty! Legal limit at my place is “can you hold a glass”.

And the Park looks pretty good…I want to sample the floor-based drinks.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Angry-The Doc Is In: it’s called a houseparty! Legal limit at my place is “can you hold a glass”.

Yea son! I knew you was my long lost older cousin man…

plus i have the advantage some how when i go out with my older friends..I love it because bartender’s think im 24 anyways…it was too funny last sunday i bout 2 six packs of beer for my dad and hubby.. my mom was like he didnt card you??!! I rarely get carded and when i do its usally the newbie at the door or at the bar that doesnt know me..

Back in my florida days.. i would get trashed at ladies night at Ale House (free drinks from 9-closing)because our servers never carded just assumed and prob because we became regualrs ahha

Blackberries are damn good btw..i like blueberries too.

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

oh yea Go Celtics!!!

18 06 2008
r.g

with all these damn comments, it better be a forum.

18 06 2008
Knatural

I literally dream of blackberries. Safeway had ’em on sale 2 six-ounce thingies for $6! Now I have an addiction.
Drinks at The Park are skrong, but their bar setup kinda sucks. One tiny bar per floor, I believe. Poor planning. But the food is great!
At this alleged, make-believe houseparty, will there also be games like Taboo or Scategories?!? The nerd in me craves games. Sorry.

18 06 2008
Angel30

@MerriLee – she’s (Wendy) a woman – she gave birth to a son who’s now 9y.o. named Kevin

18 06 2008
shabooty

ugh I installed firefox3 and my cookies arent there =p

it’s creepy at the park where theres a bunch of douches inside on the second floor looking out the window starring at people trying to get in… okay maybe that’s me, making fun of peeps. lol.

18 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Did somebody say Taboo?!?!?! *eye twitch* I dunno, I don’t want y’all to get the wrong impression of me. Friendships have ended over that game…lives nearly lost..swear words thought to have long been locked in the pits of hell flow freely…

I actually haven’t had food at the Park yet, I’ll have to give it a go.

18 06 2008
Yonnie3K

Mrs. Epps loves “creamy drinks”

Tee Hee Hee

18 06 2008
AC

Dammit, I hate surprises!

Chris, you’re killing me!!!

Can’t wait though!

18 06 2008
ILoveChris

Boston won the championship and I”m in love with Paul Pierce (MVP)

18 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

WAY TO GO BOSTON!!! just wanted to say that before i hit the sack…

LOL@ Yonnie.. yea creamy drinks are ymmy ;-)…

18 06 2008
Nice

Paul Pierce is my baby for real. I LOVE HIM. That raspy ass voice and all.

18 06 2008
HeavenLeiBlu

Fuck. This announcement is akin to having a fuck buddy who’s been blowing your back out frequently and consistently for months, and now this mofo wants to cool out and only give you the D like, only bi weekly or something.. *pouts and thumbs through my booty call phonebook*

18 06 2008
aceklub

This is crazy 422 comments to a non-post.

19 06 2008
Breez

I’m trying to catch up on my reading, but I don’t think you should totally abandon the fort idea.

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