Engagements

13 06 2008

For the third day in a row, I had to put up with some moronic teenager on a fucking cellphone telling her life for everyone to hear. This particular day, however, I got to hear this particular little gem:

Idiot on phone: “Yea, Steve and I have been totally serious for like a year now.
[Pause]
Idiot on phone: “No no, we’re pre-engaged. We’re not quite really engaged yet.”

I heard this same shit from one of my idiot 20 year-old cousins at a family gathering this weekend. My understanding is that there are exactly two types of women in relationships between the ages of 18 and 20:

  1. The type that’s in a relationship with a guy between 18 and 21
  2. The type that’s in a relationship with a guy 25 or older*

Like most people, regardless of gender, these girls want to exude a sense of maturity so they’ll be taken seriously by the world at large. Most people accomplish this by earning it: they go to school, achieve measurable success in a career or their own business, buy a house, travel, volunteer their time and/or donate to charities, mentor children, and otherwise do that thing you have to do to be taken seriously as an adult – namely, growing the fuck up.

Figure 1: The difference between a child and an adult

Most girls aged 18 – 20, however, try to take a shortcut: they get engaged.

I often find myself at an odd type of social function that puts people between the ages of 18 and 30 in mixed company: powwow after-parties, also known as 49s. During the 49, people meet, greet, talk shit, and bark at the moon pretty much like they would at a house party. Sometimes there is fire water present, and tongues (and genitals) can get a bit…loose. The fire water also makes young(er) people a little more bold than they would normally be, so inevitably you have to deal with a group of 18 – 20 year old girls running around everywhere manufacturing reasons to bring up their significant others and the fact that they’re engaged. Now this 19-going-on-20 year old thinks she has the ethos required to participate in a serious conversation of shared experiences with people my age because some dude gave her a 1/2 karat please-don’t-fuck-other-people ring.

It’s never long after mentioning the engagement that the girl begins to wax retarded about being ‘different’ and ‘more mature’ than other girls her age**. This nonsense is immediately followed by the list of standard reasons why her relationship with this dude is destined to succeed for some reason other than sheer dumb improbable luck***:

  • We’ve lived together for a year
  • We already act like we’re married, so nothing will change
  • We’re both very mature for our age
  • I talk to Jesus

Figure 2: Analog to a 20 year old’s marriage

The game is on and I’m way too tired to get into the flawed logic behind all this shit, so instead I’m going to focus my laser-beam rage on one group of chicks in particular: the pre-engaged.

WHAT THE FUCK DOES IT MEAN TO BE PRE-ENGAGED?!?!?!?!

I had another idiot cousin of mine**** show up to Christmas dinner wearing a ring on her left ring finger. Since she was 18 years old, it was clearly my duty to interrogate her roundly:

Me: [pointing at the ring] “What the hell happened to your hand?
Cousin: “Ha Ha. It’s a promise ring.”
Me: ….
Cousin: “What?”
Me: “What the hell is a promise ring?”
Cousin: “My boyfriend gave it to me.”
Me: “That’s not what I asked.”
Cousin: “It’s…a precursory token of commitment”
Me: “What the fuck did you just say?”
Cousin: “We’re pre-engaged
Me: “Really? Do you refer to the living as ‘pre-dead’, too?”

Figure : Promise Ring

Young girls aren’t the only ones that do this shit, either. I know a 33 year old woman that’s been pre-engaged for 18 months. Interestingly, pre-engagement isn’t a female invention. It’s a remarkably effective device conjured up by men to give their women the illusion of commitment and buy them more time to continue screwing around. Any chick that’s dumb enough to sincerely accept a pre-engagement ring deserves to be pre-engaged forever, so here’s what you should do if your man ever gives you one:

  1. Accept the ring lovingly
  2. Sell the ring on eBay
  3. Use the proceeds of the sale to buy a taser
  4. Apply said taser liberally to your boyfriend’s balls
  5. Fuck other people

The End.

*Also commonly referred to as a ‘child molester’
**Has anyone ever met a 20 year old girl than DOESN’T think she’s more mature than God
***This is similar to saying you can win the lottery on purpose
****Every woman in my family who isn’t my mother is retarded

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667 responses

13 06 2008
Shay-d-lady

This is a good one…. hmm did you draw any inspiration from the comment section of “the Book” post? just curious….I bet the comments are going to be on fire tomorrow!

13 06 2008
Alex

This blog is hysterical. There are excellent posts all the time! Keep up the good work.

13 06 2008
a.eye

I never understood what pre-engaged means either. I also don’t understand the years-long engagement either. I knew a couple that was engaged for 7 years before getting married. Another that was engaged for 10 and then broke up.

13 06 2008
Educated NSU Demon

Brilliant post, but evil…but what else is new on SBPH? It’s quite sad to see young girls that take shortcuts to adulthood*.

* This is what happens when parents let MTV raise their kids.

13 06 2008
ILoveChris

You are so right. 20 years old boy or girl (to me they are not man or woman) can not be mature, it’s impossible, i don’t care how mature they think they are, especially the one who’s engaged or married at that age, that’s just imature and stupid.

13 06 2008
Angry IV

I disagree, but at the same time there are legions upon legions of people that make the mistake. There is no measure to someone’s maturity, and to make a generalization is quite amateurish and immature on your part, ILoveChris.

Still, the immature young people far outweigh the mature ones.

13 06 2008
Shay-d-lady

Girls that fall for “pre engagements” and promise rings are the same ones that fall for “let me just put the head in”

13 06 2008
Muse

If a man loves and desires to marry a woman, he will not give her some bullshit pre-engagement ring. Females are still dumb enough to fall for the okie dokey? So sad.

13 06 2008
Sylph

Unfortunately, they are.

All I can say is that regardless of age, some people are mature enough to be married and others not. My uncle is currently divorcing his third wife in less than one year’s worth of marriage. I introduced my best friend and her husband back in high school and they just celebrated their first wedding anniversary this month. It really depends on the person.

I’m waiting on the responses on this one or a future wedding blog down the line.

13 06 2008
k

Very well said Chris, I couldn’t agree more.

lol @ “do you refer to the living as pre-dead” that was gold…haha

13 06 2008
F_T_Enchantress

I think every man in my family who isn’t my Father is a jackass.
And I know so many girls with promise rings it’s pathetic.

13 06 2008
shabooty

yea i gave this broad a promise ring… i told her, “promise me you’ll never turn 30” …

=)

13 06 2008
Educated NSU Demon

Girls that fall for “pre engagements” and promise rings are the same ones that fall for “let me just put the head in”

*DEAD* Pure, unadulterated excellence. lol

And I agree with Angry IV in the aspect that age definitely isn’t a meter for maturity. I’ve come across 15 and 16 year olds that have their shit much more together than 25-30 year olds. Some people at 20 years old can make a marriage work, but it most cases they can’t…it’s really best to just hold it off until you’re in a more settled place. College is more of a time to experiment, not settle down…at least IMO.

13 06 2008
puff

@ shabooty

“promise me you’ll never turn 30”

*dead* i hate that i love you so much

i’m 20 and i don’t think i’m as mature as God. i’m on the Buddha level right now. i’ll be at God when i’m 40.

but really though, there’s no way in hell i think that i’m mature enough for marriage now. can i graduate first? shiiiiiit.

13 06 2008
zoso

1. Accept the ring lovingly
2. Sell the ring on eBay
3. Use the proceeds of the sale to buy a taser
4. Apply said taser liberally to your boyfriend’s balls
5. Fuck other people

Yea buddy! I’m not sure I quite believe in marriage, let alone “pre-engagements” but I do like that Tiffany Evans song “Promise Ring” with Ciara at the intro. It’s “Hot Like Fire”!

13 06 2008
Roger

Blame it on a society that tells women they ain’t shit unless they have a man (usually a “fixer-upper” of a man), an engagement ring (preferably one more expensive than what the man could afford on his Wal-Mart “salary”), and a rifuckindiculous wedding so damned expensive, even Croesus would say, “Damn, girl, chill!” I joked to a woman acquaintance, “This is what we(gays) are fighting for? Shit, y’all can have that!”

13 06 2008
Lil'T

Just say “no” to marriage. If you feel the need to get married, spend some time with someone who hates you, followed by a good round of doing yourself in the butt (no vaseline). Same thing.

13 06 2008
Cola

Sad but true!!

@ Shay-d-lady

Why did guys think we were dumb enough to really believe that they only wanted to put the head in?! lmao!! Aww…memories!

13 06 2008
Esquire

Pre-engaged?? OMG lol dying. I have NEVER heard of such a thing!!!

Is THAT what promise rings are for?? I thought they were like cute little tokens of I like you alot and my parents gave me 100 bucks to buy this ring. Oh my. Im kind of offended. Pre-engaged? This is almost as bad as my girlfriend who swears she is engaged, but apparently has an invisible ring. I just cant…Pre-engaged? This is ALMOST as funny as your Abraham Lincoln post. Pre? I have to get some work done cause this is blowing my mind.

Just spilled coffee.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Wait.. one more time. Did I really read Pre-engaged??? The entire point of the engagement period is to make sure that you know what you are getting into and it gives you time to back out of getting married. Otherwise, people would just plan the wedding without the rings and get hitched.

So the pre-engagement is a period of time BEFORE the period of time that you take BEFORE the period of time to make sure you want to get married? confused.

So is casually dating the pre-pre-engagement? PRE-engagement. PLEASE tell me you made this up? lllllllllllllllloooooooolllll

13 06 2008
Linnea

*smh*

I think that most people who get married in today’s society do it for the wrong reason, regardless of age…..

I’m 22, and single, because I know that I’m in a place right now that whatever I want to do comes before anyone else (selfish, I know, but rather do it now than wait to have kids and be resentful….). Yes, I fancy myself as being more mature than most of my age group, only because I was forced to grow up faster than others. It’s truly on an individual basis. I had (and still have) my share of fucked up, stupid moments, but I have more responsibility on my plate, which makes me stop and think about the long term consequences…Most people my age are truly scared of growing up because college was a 4 (or more) year sleepaway camp with liquor, weed, and sex.

But I hate engagements, too….especially by people who are over the age of 30 who are doing it because they feel it’s time to “settle down”, but all the while, still fucking around. Those type of people are what irk me most. Let the youngin’s rock their ring and feel special for a while. The worst that can happen is that they will experience heartbreak and kill theirselves, but then again, maybe not. It’s possible they’ll actually learn from the experience.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Pre-engaged? She should kill herself. You should have thrown her from the train?

ok, really going to work now.

13 06 2008
Quiet Storm

“Girls that fall for “pre engagements” and promise rings are the same ones that fall for “let me just put the head in”” – Shay-d-lady

Oh s!@#, I almost choked on my water dying of hysterical laughter. I cant believe that line is still being used. Dumb asses. I knew some people that is wearing a promise ring. I don’t get it. I remember people having promise rings and bracelets in jr high and high school. We too old for that mess. It truly is a “please-don’t-fuck-other-people ring”. Damn shame.

13 06 2008
JaBe

Me: ….
Cousin: “What?”
Me: “What the hell is a promise ring?”
LOL at the pause. Love your posts.

13 06 2008
Landon

JaBe….. Harlem, holding it down, lol…

Mrs. Epps where are you????????????????? I am curious to her response to this post… Its like CHRIS read all her post and said FUCK it…. this is what i am writing about… 🙂

sidenote, what happened to the Lakers last night… SO SAD!

13 06 2008
www.thewhyblog.net

Never marry a broad. They want that money! 🙂

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

EVERY woman on the earth exc ept my mother is a RETARDO even the wise and best of them.

13 06 2008
www.thewhyblog.net

By the way this is hilarious and Landon – The NBA is the WWE…fuck it

http://www.thewhyblog.net

13 06 2008
Landon

Prime Minister —

Lets not get carried away now… WOmen are not retards…

The only real difference between Men and Women — Men use Logic… Women use something else that they created and we can’t understand. Its like Tongues…

13 06 2008
Landon

THE NBA Is the WWE…. hahaha you must read sportsguy on espn.com , lol

13 06 2008
Esquire

Thewhyblog: I was going to jump to conclusions and say that your comment about not marrying a “brod” was oh so stupid and that you probably didnt even have any money for one to gold dig. However, I would rather assume that that comment was only for “brods” not ladies. Then again the smiley face threw me off…so maybe you were trying to be funny? eh, I dont know. lol. I make three times as much as my husband and love love love him dearly. Its not always about the money just in case you werent trying to be funny.

Landon@ the Lakers got that ass beat to SLEEP as they should have.

But I know poor lil Prime was not being funny. Too bad his comment is full of errors, thus, proving how much of a “retardo” he actually is.

13 06 2008
Michael

Promise rings are like you said, please don’t fuck anyone else rings. Maybe he feels the ring will stop her from being Eiffel Towered, LOL.

Side note: Because of this blog “Eiffel Towered” is my new derogatory term for females who talk too much shit.

I used to work with a large group of these people and daily I wanted to unplug my monitor, throw it across the room, and pray to Michael Bay it created a chain reaction explosion. I especially loved the ones with kids and would use Word to make banners to put across their cubicles that broadcast how much they loved their finances. The one that stood out the most was the 18 year old that was dating a 35 year old man and had his name as her screen saver, taped to her monitor, and I am sure tattooed inside her eyelids.

13 06 2008
puff

Landon, are you trying to get something started like you did yesterday with that logic comment?

13 06 2008
Mrs. Kennedy

Having been the victim of the pre-engagement scam at 18, this is quite possibly thee most sound dating advice I have ever heard, and thank god its coming from a man.
When I mentored teenage girls, I could stand up there until i was blue in the face telling them that promise rings were bullshit and their eyes would glaze over and excuses would fly (mind you, these broads already had kids). But as soon as I brought in a cute, 20 something year old man to say the EXACT SAME THING, their eyes (and tits) perked up and they were all ears, asking questions and everything.
You should share your vast knowledge with the youth. . .

13 06 2008
Landon

hey puff puff pass:

me trying to start something? Not I said the rabbit 🙂

13 06 2008
Landon

Men do stupid things PUFF… by all means just look at half my comments… but there is at least a rhyme and reason behind our logic of thinking… Sometimes yall ladies just baffle me with your though process. i need logic to compute. 🙂

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I HAVE ARRIVED!!!! well i actually read this post lastnight lol(was bored after the game lastnight GO Celtics!!!) I didnt feel like responding lastnight so I’ll do it now before my 11 o’clock meeting.

First off…i know most of you guys had a convo with me yesterday about my engagment/marriage…and i have to laugh at this post because a) its some funny ass shit b) I find it very convient that you decide to write about this after most likely reading the comments from yesterday’s post.

Question..what the fuck is a pre-engagement? lol I’m trying to wrap my mind around that as many others who have commented already…Personally anyone who excepts this “pre-engagment” bs is a fucking dumbass. I had a ex that tried that “promise ring” shit on me.. fuck i look like a fool..

Chris i dont know if you should put all 20 yr old in the same boat…I’m not going to sit here and talk til im blue in the face about my engagment again either…And i dont think I’m better than god.

I dont think its fair to judge other “young adults” about the decisions”THEY” are making..if your cousin wants to buy the “pre-engagment” bs then let her…she is a big girl..let her get hurt then she can learn from that and make better choices in her life..but to sit up here and call females between the ages of 18-20 who are engaged retarded is a bit immature…I dont think im stupid for getting married to a man who I have loved for 4 yrs now. I still love your blog man!! 🙂

like I said yesterday it is understandable when people give me the wide eye when I tell them Im engaged…the only thing that pisses me off about ppls comments about it that they dont know me personally and what I’m about and where I am in my life…I think I have advanced beyond my yrs that is written on paper. There are 25-30 yr old that havent even accomplished the shit I have the past yr. My mother and father are proud of me and that is all that matters right?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

damn I didnt realize I wrote a short story hahah

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esquire: “But I know poor lil Prime was not being funny. Too bad his comment is full of errors, thus, proving how much of a “retardo” he actually is.”

LMAO!

typo = retardo. FUN E! if we’re all retarded does that make you any less?

GO BOSTON!

13 06 2008
Landon

sometimes its not about who you are or were you are… but we were all at one point in our lives at an age were we thought we were the most mature and understadning person at that age. Very few 20 years olds say you know what… i am just an ordinary person who will make the same mistakes. We all thought we were smarter or more mature than the next 20 year old. As much as you think you know your self we have a slightly better idea what is ahead of you because we have already experienced it. Hell your body has not even fully matured yet… Your chest is still perky and you can prob eat what ever you want still. That changes when you hit 25, lol… We are not judging you… we are judging the many who came before you…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Michael- The one that stood out the most was the 18 year old that was dating a 35 year old man and had his name as her screen saver, taped to her monitor, and I am sure tattooed inside her eyelids.

hahahah i know a girl like that.. she has her “fiance” name tatted on her arm, back, and thigh.. thats a bit much.. one thing that all females should never do is get a man’s name tatted on thier body..thats the dumbest shit i ever seen…i can understand maybe your name or your childs..but a dude…fuck no!
18 and 35… wow that’s a big ass gap he could be her daddy

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Landon: “The only real difference between Men and Women — Men use Logic… Women use something else that they created and we can’t understand. Its like Tongues…”

it’s more like nonsensical fanciful bullshit covered in blue stars, green clovers, Dr. Phils’ fermented feces, unicorns, santa claus juice and easter bunny hair. hey but i lovem.

13 06 2008
Landon

Prime:

WOW… Jaw on Floor!

13 06 2008
Vanita

lmao@ Pre-engagement…

But seriously…These young girls who fall for ‘pre-engagments’ are usually dating a guy over 25. And guys over 25 who exclusively date 18-21 year olds are sick to me. These guys have nothing goin for themselves except a bunch of young girls who dont know any better supporting his ass. GROW UP PLEASE!!! Why cant you get a woman your age? Is it because she can smell the bullshit on you you even speak? She VERY QUICKLY realizes(its like a x-ray detection) you have NOTHING going for yourself and doesnt give you the time of day?
But the young girl will be HONORED to have an older guy talking to her, let alone ‘pre-engage’ her.
Just stop it. Its sickning.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon I understand all that… women who are older, well people in general have more experience than me..thats a given.. but my question is what makes you think that I havent already experienced”some” of the things a 25 yr old has experienced? just curious..and this all goes back to the fact that this is a blog and we dont know each other from Adam…None of you guys grew up with me to fully understand who I am and what I have experienced…I dont mean to be a pain in the ass about it..but this is a touch subject for me considering the facts ya’ll recently learned about lil ol Mrs. Epps 🙂

13 06 2008
klysha

Me: “Really? Do you refer to the living as ‘pre-dead’, too?”

Laughed out loud again as usual! And I promised myself yesterday that I wouldn’t read this blog during working hours…but it’s Friday so WTH. I guess I should go buy myself a ring and call myself pre-pre-pre-pre engaged….(is that enough pre-s to go back to the point before you even met someone you’re interested in seriously dating???) This is so on point! But I have a feeling it’s going to piss some of your readers off. (To any 18-20 year who’s pissed off stop taking yourself so seriously…taking light hearted ribbing with a smile is a part of growing up) And I have to say that there really are some 20 year olds who can make marriage work. My mom got married at 20 and her and my dad are still happily married 31 years later….but there might have been some shotguns involved since i’m 31 years old so maybe that’s a bad example. To all 20 year olds who believe they have reached the pinnacle of maturity all I can say is keep on living.

13 06 2008
Omar

Hilarious post…Engagements to me are for planning the wedding, where you are going to live and who has to throw what away…having 2 of everything ain’t cool. So if this takes several years “I say and I say again you been had, hoodwinked, led astray, run amuck…”

All that still getting to know the person stuff should be done before you spend half a year salary or some crazy shit on a ring.

Pre-engagements are stupid but you have to admire the G it takes for someone to fall for it.

13 06 2008
Omar

BY the way a committed relationship is a committed relationship if he cheated on you before the ring you still got problems.

what happened to 22-24???

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I love you guys..but why do looks to hard in to marriage..if a 18 yr old gets married isnt it his or her mistake or blessing to make…dont make me get creole booty on your ass and call you old jealous single ppl hahaha i kid really…dont boot me chris!!

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Vanita: “These guys have nothing goin for themselves except a bunch of young girls who dont know any better supporting his ass. GROW UP PLEASE!!! Why cant you get a woman your age?”

now i’m sure you’ll deny it but i smell a double standard. i wonder if you have as much disdain or would it be apathy for an older woman who dates a younger man where the age gap is comparable to your assnalogy. …and in what way, pray tell are these 18-21 yr. old girls supporting their 25 yr old boyfriends? (his balls perhaps) and the girls, i wonder if they are receiving any kind of support? i mean other than the diamond promise ring. hmmmm i gotta think about that 1.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

” Linnea (13:03:01) :
Most people my age are truly scared of growing up because college was a 4 (or more) year sleepaway camp with liquor, weed, and sex”

Erhm…you say that like it’s a bad thing? 🙂 Seriously though, I agree that college has infantilized young adults to some extent…but it affords people the opportunity like never before to learn, travel, experience, and otherwise focus on developing themselves before becoming attached to another. When done right marriage/family does involve a lot of compromise to make it work and be a true partnership…but people don’t even give themselves time to be “me” first before becoming “me and my SO”. And heck, we’re living and working longer, it’s just not necessary to get locked into a job and relationship/family at 20 when you probably have 70+ years of life left.
Also, psychologically people are definitely still undergoing significant developmental changes at 20. I know people flamed ILoveChris for saying it, but I have to agree, a 20 year old IS NOT mature even though some may deal with certain situations in a mature manner. The immaturity is certainly not a death sentence for a relationship at that age, people can grow together…I think the annoying thing that the blog was talking about are those kids getting married who act like that’s putting the final piece in the puzzle of having ALL their shit together….come on now, you’re not fooling anyone.

13 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“I love you guys..but why do looks to hard in to marriage.”

What?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Hilarious post…Engagements to me are for planning the wedding, where you are going to live and who has to throw what away…having 2 of everything ain’t cool. So if this takes several years “I say and I say again you been had, hoodwinked, led astray, run amuck…”

See this is what we are doing now! All the planning and stuff, We already got the house and got rid of all the junk so we are a step ahead. Now all we have to do is plan the wedding and honeymoon…but we know it will be beach side in Key West we just have to book it the time now, reception at my Aunt’s house.

13 06 2008
Esquire

May it please the Court,

Prime you really ARE retarded. Lets go thru your errors okay? Because I was not talking about your slang “Retardo”

“EVERY woman on the earth exc ept my mother is a RETARDO even the wise and best of them.”

Mistake #1: “ex cept” should be except

Mistake #2: Your lack of a period or a comma after RETARDO. Either would have been appropriate. Your sentence is a run on.

Mistake #3: “even the wise and best of them.” Should be “wisest” Is this ebonics? I don’t speak that, so maybe this is correct in your world. You are murdering those substantative adjectives.

I rest my case, Your Honor. I respectfully ask that you make a final ruling on the lack of mental fuctionability of said Defendant.

I will give you a pass since you like the Celtics. My only point is quit calling women “Retardos” if you appear to be retarded as a male. How OLD are you anyway?

Back to billable work.

13 06 2008
Landon

Key West…

NO NO NO NO… I cant have that Mrs. Epps…

BORA BORA… ST. Johns, Atlantis, Aruba, Canary Islands,

if you going to get hitched that young, minds well do it right!!!

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Aahhhh, Landon I just got back from Aruba a couple weeks ago, don’t remind me how badly I want to be back there 😦

13 06 2008
Omar

You go where you can afford to go…they are buying a house…most of the fun will be indoors anyway, its a honeymoon.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I meant look so hard in to marriage..meaning why do you think that being married makes shit more difficult than it already is? Get married just legalizes the “already” relationship between two people who love each other and want to be together forever. I dont believe that getting married will make anything easier or harder than it already is day in day out living together as a couple. The only things that really change is the womens lastname, maybe a joint bank account, kids, joint cell bill but everything else is basically the same if you think about it.

To me marriage is about working as a team, love, understanding, faithfulness, honesty and most of all communication. If a couple has been doing this for so many years than why not get married unless marriage just aint for you.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Prime Minister…yeah it probably is a double standard…deal! 🙂 (We’ve had to deal with player vs. ho, motivated vs. bitch and many more double standards for years).
And I dunno, with older guys dating much younger women you really can often smell that “something just ain’t right with him so he’s gotta lure a youngin’ that doesn’t know any better”. With older women, sometimes it’s more like they want a project they can mold or want a guy before he gets too corrupted by the world, lol. I’m just going on what friends tell me though, I don’t like to date far up or down out my age range. Also, I think these days, more older women are getting played into supporting younger guys.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

well he thought of Hawaii.. but its kinda cheesy dont ya think…lol Plus my mom wants to invite everyone and not everyone has Hawaii money like us hahah…I dunno yet..we still ahve time we arent getting married til June 26th 2009…for the record to the ppl that say what about finishing college.. i will alreayd be a graduate by then and i’ll be 21 as well 🙂

13 06 2008
klysha

I agree with Omar that engagements are for planning the wedding and figuring out how you’re going to mix your lives together. If you’re not ready to do that then don’t get engaged. The promise ring stuff is kinda cute and people who get them should enjoy the little gift but recognize that it doesn’t really mean anything. For too many people the real engagement ring doesn’t even mean much since the older I get the more failed marriages and failed engagements I see. And even 25 is an arbitrary number as a measure of maturity. So are 30 and 40. Maturity from what I have observed is a process not a destination. And to Mrs. Epps I hope everything works out fabulously. If it does then you get to pass on the bitter and single 30 and over club that so many of my friends are members of. If it doesn’t you’ll be that much wiser from your experiences when/if you re-enter the dating world. Either way live your life as you see fit.

13 06 2008
Landon

I guess you were the prosecutor:

I will be his Defense:

Your honor if we judged everyone purely by their grammar syntax on this web site SBPH (including myself) we would all be guilty of the charges Esquire has presented. However, she has not presented 100% without a doubt that Prime is a retard. Anyone could make the mistakes he made. Some people on this site were English majors and still make errors. We might not all agree with Prime’s comments nonetheless he has the right to make the argument. He was using such harsh comments as a ploy and did not intend to insult people directly. He understands that the WOMEN on this site are intelligent. He was just trying to convey the disparity between men and women and why communication between us often fails.
Its like calling your credit card company and the operator is in India with the name BOB… You cannot understand his english well and you call him a retard because you don’t understand his English. Even though you think he is a retard there is a high probability the operator (BOB) in INDIA has a PHD nuclear physics but he could only get a job answering phone calls about why getting a credit increase.

W/o a JD i rest my case… Thank you.

13 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“I dont believe that getting married will make anything easier or harder than it already is day in day out living together as a couple.”

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I just fully crapped in my pants. I guess I need to grow up, too.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

My friend got married in St. Lukes a few months ago..NO she wasnt 20 lol she’s 25..it was beautiful..perfect weather too

13 06 2008
Landon

If marriage was that simple there would be no need for divorce lwayers
People would just split and go their seperate ways… but NO…. its a lil more complicated.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol Chris…maybe you do…i kid ;-D

13 06 2008
Bubbly

I never got “pre-engagements”, either. Ether you are , or you aren’t (engaged).

On that note, I will say from personal experience that some are mature enough for real commitment, but not most 20 year olds these days are not. Atually, alot of 25+ are not mature enough.

(I got married young–I was 22 and he was 27, and it’s going on 3 years of goodness. Everybody thought we didn’t know what the fuck we were doing, but we proved thier asses wrong, because the people that advised us not to marry are the people that are now in failing relationships.)

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon ppl get divorced for the dumbest reasons nowadays….and no marriage isnt simple as that i was given my general opinion about it..neither is a relationship…Marriage is a job..work hard you get good things…slack off you get shitted on with divorced papers…

When my parents got married not even 7 hrs later they had a fight and my mom said fuck it lets get divorced lol…then they made up…they have been married 10 yrs now..

13 06 2008
maya

I’m 23, and I can say I’m not who I was three years ago, much less who I’ll be when I’m 30. I consider relationships at extremes – if they’re functional (flaws and all) they’re great; if they’re falling apart at the seams, I’d rather not be bothered.

I think we as black women are especially quick to plummet ourselves into relationships because of the adage, “There are few good black men out there,” in regards to their compatibility with Black women professionally and in terms of education. I’ve seen more chicks try to tweak themselves into a relationship for the sake of trying to work with what they got. But like my mom says, “You can’t keep no nigga that don’t wanna be kept,” and so then next thing you know, you got chicks running around singing ‘Ring the Alarm” and slashing people’s tires. Bitterness is a sad sight to see.

One thing I’ve definitely noticed with girls in my own family is that this generation of chicks wants to be GROWN and doesn’t know what grown means. They imitate what they think it means to be a woman; and get themselves lost and turned out in the process.

I’ve often wondered if the dynamics between black men and women (particularly in the 18-25 age group) have become increasingly turbulent over the last few generations. The way I see it is, I have a lot to offer, and will do so willingly given the right circumstances. But I’ll be damned if I’m running around chasing some dude; nor playing myself with these false hopes some dudes offer up by the boatload.

It also seems that this “pre-engagement” and “promise ring” phenomena (both of which are hilarious to me) mimics another trend of brothas who are like to operate as its convenient to them. I have an associate who has been dating this chick since HIGH SCHOOL – tells everyone and their mom how much he loves her; she’s the one; they’re getting married…but has two phones so his side jawn can call without him getting caught up…and has hit on two of my friends… The nuttiest shit about it is, we as women want to much to be wanted, we turn a blind eye, and think it’s a phase or we can “change him” ’cause he’ll love us that much.

No ma’am.

13 06 2008
Omar

@Landon – we have divorce lawyers because divorce is complicated and people’s FUBAR’d marriages were originally fucked up relationships so it’s on the people and relationships in general are complicated marriage just adds pressure because you can’t just leave.

Food for thought the divorce rate has gone up about the same time that people started getting married at older ages. The advantage of getting married young is that you can grow together older people are often stuck in their ways and have a hard time adapting to the flaws of their mate or adjusting their own flaws.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

My Cousin got married when she was 21 and her husband 20..they been happily married for 5 yrs with a daughter and one on the way…now i think thats great…but i dunno if i would got pregnant that fast…when they found out they were in between apts since they are both navy…but the seemed to work it out now they have a permanate home in VA beach.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I’ll be the judge:

The court has considered both sides of the argument. However, on 3/26/08 in People v SBPH, the court ruled the following:

No matter how lucid, logical, and utterly bulletproof your argument is, it will be rendered completely useless by a dangling participle. Did you just find the cure for AIDS? Who the fuck cares – your press release used the word “it’s” where you should’ve used “its”! You, madam, are an uneducated, apostrophe-ignorant, AIDS-curing colostomy bag of a human being!

Instead, we will read your argument carefully – but the first time we go through it, all we’re doing is looking for is mistakes in your writing. We’re looking for spelling errors, dangling prepositions, sentence fragments, improper semicolon use, and other things that are extremely relevant to your argument. We don’t care that, after observing chimps in the wild for 30 years, you’ve discovered that some have learned to cultivate their own food: you spelled banana ‘bannana’ in your research paper, and therefore, you are only slightly more intelligent than the very creatures you study.

Once we’ve discovered a technical error in your writing, the debate is effectively over. You will usually be told something to the effect of “Why don’t you learn how to spell next time you decide to post here?” and, surprisingly, this will be enough to convince everyone that a.) you’re an idiot, and b.) the person that called you out is a genius.

The court finds that Prime is a fucktard. Court dismissed. bangs gavel

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Omar, correlation =/= causation. There are sooooo many changes society has undergone that has made divorce rates go up/divorce be more “acceptable”.

13 06 2008
maya

Oddly, we do not judge people as heavily for poor HTML coding.

13 06 2008
Lindsay

Hi everybody.

I’m 23, and have been with the same guy for 4 years. We’re not married, and will not be getting married any time soon. Why? Neither of us has established ourselves as independents just yet. I’ve been out of school and in my field for a year and I just got my own place last week. He is still in school and waiting for the police academy to start so he can begin his career of choice.

Couples around us are asking us why we’re a) not living together b) not expecting a child together (this one truly boggles my mind) c) not “officially” engaged (certainly, the marriage conversation has been had, but the papers won’t be signed anytime soon), etc. etc.

My answer? We’re not ready yet. Sure, we love each other. Sure, I’ve known him for 10 years. Sure, he’s my best friend (and has been for lo these 10 years), yadda yadda. But I’m not rushing into marriage/cohabitation and neither is he. I’m just not trying to be yoked to someone so soon.

**Disclaimer** I am skeptical of marriage, in general. I hear people talking about folks who have been married for 3-5-10-15 years. I say, Talk to me when you hit 30 years. And even then, nothing is guaranteed.

13 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

People get divorced at the drop of a hat because we live in a culture that increasingly promotes selfishness, impatience, and the disposable nature of virtually everything.

Nothing is sacred, and only about 1 in 5 people have what could be considered good character in the traditional sense. What were once principles are now mere guidelines. 80% of people fucking suck.

People are taught that being ‘uncompromising to yourself’ is a good thing, which is complete and utter bullshit…unless you plan on marrying your right hand or a vibrator.

World War III will go a long way towards pulling everyone’s head out of their asses.

I fucking goddamn hate everything right now.

13 06 2008
zoso

“i can understand maybe your name”

Nope. Nope. I can’t see the point in tattooing your OWN name on your body either, let alone a current, I stress current, significant other’s. I’m inclined to extend that to anyone’s name but I’m sure there are special circumstances so I leave it at that.

13 06 2008
Landon

Chris:

Why are you so mad right now? Are you having an Office SPace moment at work?

13 06 2008
Landon

World War III would bring about many changes…

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Yeah – what the hell is up with asking single people why they don’t have any children yet? For real? That’s where we are now?

13 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Why are you so mad right now? Are you having an Office SPace moment at work?”

See Figure 1 of this post.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Omar-Food for thought the divorce rate has gone up about the same time that people started getting married at older ages. The advantage of getting married young is that you can grow together older people are often stuck in their ways and have a hard time adapting to the flaws of their mate or adjusting their own flaws.

sorry ya’ll gotta co-sign..and it doesnt really matter how old or how young you are..if you are in a fucked up realtionship from the get go..then its gonna me a messy ass marriage if you choose to go that route…you can be 18,19,20 get married and the marriage can be shit or the shit..you can be 24,25,26,27,28-30 get married the marriage can be awesome or horrible.

13 06 2008
shabooty

agreed fuck everything……..goddamnit………….

13 06 2008
Esquire

Landon,

Thats why its illegal for people who dont have a law license to practice law.

I object your honor, Defendant’s counsel is obviously using evidence NOT duly submitted to all parties. How can anyone reasonably deduct from his one comment the following?

“He was using such harsh comments as a ploy and did not intend to insult people directly. He understands that the WOMEN on this site are intelligent. He was just trying to convey the disparity between men and women and why communication between us often fails.”

My argument, my honor, fully rests on the evidence that was presented to me. We are not permitted to use evidence that is neither presented or reasonably deduced from evidence.

Your Honor, I would also like to object on the basis of FRCP 403: Relevance:

“Your honor if we judged everyone purely by their grammar syntax on this web site SBPH (including myself) we would all be guilty of the charges Esquire has presented”

This argument is not relevant for several reasons: This trial is about Prime Minister. There are no other defendants present. In fact, Sir, I am guilty of this myself, we all are.

Defendant’s crime is not making grammatical errors, but his crime is doing so while attempting to call women “Retardos.” Sir, as a legal scholar, I am sure that you are familiar with Equity and the doctrine “Unclean Hands”

Mr. Minister has falsely accused other of being “Retardos” while engaging in the act of being one. His hands are unlean, in fact, filthy. This, Your Honor, is not at all equitable, not at all just, and is simply moronic.

I ask that you kick Landon out of this court, as he does not have a license, as well as holding him criminally in contempt of court for making a mockery of the justice system. In addition, he is just mad because the Lakers and Kobe “Rapist–Take it from the Back” Bryant got an ass kicking.

I rest my case. Again.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

*sigh* this hits home horribly. I’m 22 and my now ex-boyfriend just turned 21 in April. We broke up right before he turned 21 because he felt he wasn’t “ready” to be in a committed relationship.

Now he’s back in my life kinda and is scared to get back together with me because he thinks then there will be all this pressure to get married. And I’m like, pressure from who??? I sure as hell don’t want to get married at 22. I don’t want to get married until I’m out of school, at the very least.

Why do guys think every girl wants to get married straight away?

13 06 2008
Anonymiss

Me: [pointing at the ring] “What the hell happened to your hand?
Cousin: “Ha Ha. It’s a promise ring.”
Me: ….
Cousin: “What?”
Me: “What the hell is a promise ring?”
Cousin: “My boyfriend gave it to me.”
Me: “That’s not what I asked.”
Cousin: “It’s…a precursory token of commitment”
Me: “What the fuck did you just say?”
Cousin: “We’re pre-engaged
Me: “Really? Do you refer to the living as ‘pre-dead’, too?”

LMBAO!!! Keep up the good work.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Damn Landon,

According to The Honorable Yonnie, you and Prime lose.

You can appeal though. However, appellate work is hard. And you must argue that the judge erred in some way. Its not just a second bite at the apple.

13 06 2008
Landon

sex in the city made us think that ever girl wants to get married, lol

13 06 2008
Danger Mouse

“Me: “Really? Do you refer to the living as ‘pre-dead’, too?” ”

…LMAO…

13 06 2008
Omar

@The Doc Is In – that still doesn’t change the fact that when you are 30 and have been living on your own for 8 or 9 years that someone coming into your place telling you that you need to change shit is going to cause some friction.

In the beginning of a marriage flexibility is the best thing you can have.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esquire: Prime you really ARE retarded. Lets go thru your errors okay? Because I was not talking about your slang “Retardo”

thanks for grading my paper moms. LOL! i wasn’t minding my p’s and q’s, but it was cogent enough for you to get the point nonetheless. btw, are you sure you wouldn’t rather be reading the grammar section of SWPL or SWWPL instead of dealing with my retardation. …and since u seem to be so intensely anal retentive regarding everyones blammar (blog-grammar) and in the spirit of your school marms-ish demeanor and hackneyed fillibustering, i should have and will now bestow upon you, your rightful description of idiot savante. i am sorry for lumping you amongst the rest of my retarded brothers and sisteren. gooday. get over it. LOL! New England bites.

13 06 2008
Lindsay

Also, people get divorced at the drop of a hat because in this society, marriage is no longer necessary for survival at its basest level, for anyone. You take out the need for one person to hunt, the other to gather –> the need for a steady income outside the home, the other to take care of the home –> introduce the concepts that women can support themselves and human beings don’t need to produce their own food, and what does that leave you with?

Marrying for love.

And a lot of folks don’t know what love is. When they “fall out of it,” they end the marriage.

**Disclaimer (my second today): This is a sweeping generalization and doesn’t include those divorces borne out of abusive or otherwise legitimately dysfunctional marriages.

13 06 2008
Landon

R. kellys trial – http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/13/rkelly.closings.ap/index.html

Jury just went into deliberations….

WHat you guys think…

is he going to be found guilty, innocent or hung jury?

13 06 2008
zoso

“People get divorced at the drop of a hat because we live in a culture that increasingly promotes selfishness, impatience, and the disposable nature of virtually everything.”

I agree.

“Nothing is sacred, and only about 1 in 5 people have what could be considered good character in the traditional sense.”

I disagree with the statistic, more like 2/5.

“What were once principles are now mere guidelines. 80% of people fucking suck.”

Now folks say this, but what of those who mock and belittle those who read “self-help” books or seek paths to better themselves, via certain physical/spiritual exercises? Example: traditional martial arts, not Miagi’s archnemesis’ dragon dojo, but aikido, etc. (Am I speaking of personal experience? Yep.)

“People are taught that being ‘uncompromising to yourself’ is a good thing, which is complete and utter bullshit…unless you plan on marrying your right hand or a vibrator.”

True enough. Learning to bend, while keeping your core values, yet sacrificing for the good of the whole is a lost art.

“World War III will go a long way towards pulling everyone’s head out of their asses.”

Sometimes I think it’s inevitable, other times I think there’s still hope.

“I fucking goddamn hate everything right now.”

I’m on a quest to not let folks, and circumstances rile me up/affect me so much.

13 06 2008
Omar

Fuck R. Kelly send is ass to jail, he can sing for cigarettes…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

wait someone asked why you arent expecting a child maya..hell naw!! thats madness…just because you have been together for 4 yrs doesnt automaticlly mean your gonna get married, move in togther or have children.. ppl are crazy..and what gets me is that ppl are actually ok with having children out of wedlock..fuck all that bullshit…if and when i do have children i will be married..i’m no ones babymama…

13 06 2008
Esquire

Why is it when Black people know grammar, they are accused of being white? If you scroll through my entries you will find tons of typos. But I have never insulted an entire gender while doing so. Its pretty hard to insult someone when you are practicing in the same behavior.

Truth be told, Im just fucking with you. I dont really care that much. In fact, I defended you the other day. How quickly we forget. I would work on my “Coming Soon” before casting more stones.

I just dont want to write my brief, which is why Im assing around on here, on the verge of getting fired.

13 06 2008
Lindsay

Yeah, Mrs. Epps,

We went to go see his friend and HIS baby’s mother in the hospital after she had their son (his first child, her second). And they were in there like, “yeah, it’s gonna be y’all in here next.”

I was like, “absolutely not. Next topic.”

Like, fuck outta here. I am 23 years old and I’m not even sure if I want kids yet. There will be no accidents. This couple can’t even go a week without “breaking up,” but was TRYING to have a baby. Like, literally. Ovulation schedules and shit like that.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon-sex in the city made us think that ever girl wants to get married, lol

i hate sex and the city.

the end.

13 06 2008
Vanita

Prime: No, I think Cougars (thats what they call older women who date men 20 years their jr, right?) are just as gross. It disturbs ME (maybe not others) when these women want to marry these men. SOMETIMES it makes me wonder if they feel socially inadequate. But some of them do it just to get their freak on. I gots nothing wrong if you got a few kinks that need to be worked out every now and again.

13 06 2008
Landon

Esquire:

in your opinion do you think R kelly is going to be found guilty?

13 06 2008
D.R.L.F.

The only thing that truly bothers me about engagements are engagement parties, bridal showers and every other way I get raped for presents by people I barely care about and who are too broke and/or lack the home training to reciprocate properly. I also hate weddings that don’t have open bars. I have to eat and drink back some of the money I spent on the outfit and presents and a cash bar just turns the event into a club where I have to try to find somebody to buy me a drank.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I hope R. Kelly is sentenced to 15 years of solitary confinement when his only interaction with other people is for the hour each day that they open the top of his cell and random people (who have paid money for the privilege) get to urinate on him. The funds should be used for the Association for Sexually Abused Children (NAMBLA).

But after his next album comes out…b/c he is The Remix Killer

13 06 2008
Vanita

Landon

and I honestly hope r kelly is found guilty….what took the cake for me was when another woman was gonna testify that she had a THREESOME with him and the lil girl…I nearly fell out when I heard that.

I WANNA say that the lil girl was blinded by another old fool, but I just cant believe anyone would just sit there and get pissed on…I dunno whether to say poor lil girl, or beat her lil ass…

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

R. Kelly is a disgusting human being. That is all.

13 06 2008
Cheekie

ROFL @ Ring Pop promise ring. That right there is the ESSENCE of the immaturity behind promise rings.

13 06 2008
Landon

I never forget my cousin’s wedding…. I was with my older cousin who is more like my uncle we go to the bar and order about 8 drinks for the table… the bar keep comes back and says that will be $80. My cousins just turns around sits back at his seat. Takes out his gift envelope rips up the check he wrote and proceeded to write a new check for 10 dollars… Hillarious… ah i love my family.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Lindsay, OMGGG wow.. thats intense.. they break up but want a child together.. thats some backwards shit..yea my friend is pregnant now will be due in September.. like i really dont know whats on this girls mind..but she has been dating the dude umm her “boyfriend, fiance, baby-daddy” on and off since she was 15..personally i think dude is crazy and over-protective and possesive of her..well she got pregnant last yr..claims she didnt wan tthe baby it was an “accident”

SideNOte: babys arent accidents..get it together ppl..everyone knows could happen if a man nuts in a women…

well she lost the baby at 6 months..she’s sad but kinda happy and is cool..well i talk to her a few months later she’s preganant again..SMH i wanted to slap her when she told me..its liek she wants to get pregnant but doesnt..make sense? when she was pregnant the 1st time she actually asked me if me and my man wanted the baby shoe would ahve to give it up for adoption.. I LOOKED AT HER and said “bitch fuck ima do with a baby”? lol i thought she was really kidding but she wasnt…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

you know as far as tattoos are going, no names. Unless you are naming your right arm or have a special pet name for your nipple that you think you may forget, no names. Even RIP, unless you are scared of alzheimers, and even then, you’re just going to wander around wondering who the fuck tyrell the magical was and why you have his name on your dick.

13 06 2008
Omar

People with kids tend to do that shit, muthafuckas jinxed me… anyway I have one (6 months) and people got the audacity to ask when am I having another.

What the hell is wrong with people affording the first one is hard enough and shit like diapers, food and gas ain’t getting any cheaper!!!

13 06 2008
Landon

If R kelly is found guilty he might try to FLEE… because he will not be treated nicely in Jail unless all of those tryign to get an album deal protect him…

Child molestors are the bottom of the foodchain in jail… they are below crooked cops…

13 06 2008
Lindsay

On the tattoo topic: I’m against tattoos with words in ’em. Completely against. Or lettering.

Dunno why, just am. Yes, I have a tattoo.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Landon,

I dont really know enough about it except what I hear on the radio on the way to work. lol Something about a mole…its not me…yes it is…theres your mole.
From what I heard, it didnt look too good. He’d probably get isolation though. He’s a celebrity and child molestors from what I hear arent favored in Oz.

Cougars are awesome.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Omar, it may be difficult, but it’s not a dealbreaker, again, a mature person who knows his or herself and is actually is ready for marriage understands the flexibility and accommodation required (and I’m not sure why you think a younger person is necessarily more flexible in a way that’s conducive to a better marriage). It’s not like what’s easiest is best…it was EASY back when the marriage role for a woman was clearly to stay home and have babies…but now God forbid, we gotta figure out how to work in her career and shit, lol. (Oh and please don’t take that as me saying being a SAHM is easy, anything but! I just meant it was easy when there was no choice, it was understood that was the role the woman would play).

13 06 2008
Landon

funny thing is i have a brand, but i would never get a tattoo… go figure…

The only Tattoo i was cosidering was a doozy it would have taken up my whole back.. I wanted a tat of my family tree but it go too complicated. Do i just use my dad side of the family my mom parents and my dads side of the family. Do i leave space to add names…

then i foudn out it would take about 8 hours to get it done right and well THATS TOO LONG FOR SOMEONE TO BE JABBING ME WITH SOME needles..

Last night during the game they said R> Rondo didnt want to take a shot for his ankle because he is afraid of needles… however he has a tatto of his initals covering his whole back… (IRONIC)?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

R.Kelly is a nasty old fool and i hope they sentence him the min of 10 yrs in prison..and let the paparazzi take pics of him sitting in between his boyfriend Bruce Leroys legs getting some prison doodoo braids.

one thing i cant stand is a old ass man tryna act like he’s 18 again.. older men need to lay off the damn cornrows foreal..that ish aint cute no more..anyone see the pic of him with the gold cornrows and gold suit.. looking like a damn oscars award…smh

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Vanita: but I just cant believe anyone would just sit there and get pissed on…

How old is 15…Really?

13 06 2008
Natalie

After seeing some marriages in my family go down in a crash of fiery despair (my parents’ included) I am incredibly skeptical of the concept of marriage. However, the part about this subject that freaks me out the most is when someone gets married to a significant other whom he or she thought was their one true love and then they figure out later—typically after a kid or two has been born–that “Hey this really sucks. We should stop this” but then these people REMARRY someone else and they actually end up staying with the second person WAY longer than the original. Is there any way to avoid what I like to call the “Etch A Sketch” or “Magna Doodle” marriage and just find that person who you’ll be with the longest anyway? It just seems like too much work to go through all the emotion of one marriage and be ready for another…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I get you doc. Not to say it was better but it was easy to understand. Easy to follow… not so much. Although I do want to say, that I feel I meet more people of my generation, talking about marriage for life, and thus scared to get married because they don’t want to deal with divorce. Then you get the people (mostly white people but not all) who say that they don’t need marriage. They go ahead and have babies, live together bank together etc like married couples but are scared of the paper. I find that odd as well. However I blame republicans for the loss of the common law marriage (in their zealous distraction fearmongering about gay marriage). Used to be if you lived with someone for 7 years, your asses were married according to the law. Don’t need a ring, you were defaulted into that shit. I think that was cool.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

LOL, less IRONIC, more IDIOTIC…although a tat needle feels a lot different that a medicinal needle, it just felt like a little tickling scratch to me, but it lasts for a long time. I agree with those who say tattooing a name is stupid and I don’t like to see ladies with tattoos in places like their biceps…ugh!! I guess to combine the topic of engagements and tattoos…I HATE going to weddings and seeing all the bridal party in these classy gowns but hoodrat names and pictures all over their arms and backs…cover that ish up with makeup!

13 06 2008
Tasha

This is absolutely hilarious because at 19 and 20, I very much thought I was grown. I had the prerequisite child molester boyfriend and the pre engagement bracelet not ring, but I still started planning a wedding to a man twice my age with no real intention to marry me (But I was twenty and confused). Thankfully, I grew up for real at some point and came to my senses. Great post!!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damnit landon, now I want to meet you. Dustin may be partially in love with you but I feel like I’m going to argue with your ass all day. But I enjoy shit like that. Whatev.

13 06 2008
Landon

i never understood the tattoo on the neck… never understood that.

13 06 2008
Dustin

I love that Yonnie cited SBPH.

Esquire, you’re funny and smart; but you were one of “those” people in law school, weren’t you?

DRLF, I agree. I don’t go to weddings anymore because I dont’ want to reward people’s choices to ruin their lives. Why drag me into their shame?

13 06 2008
Landon

Why thank you…

Thankfully i am comfortable in my man hood and sexuality not to be freaked out by DUSTIN… and take a complment when you get one…

Because MUSE just insults me and has been trying to take my self esteem out every since i been on this thing…

WHo is on the facebook page… i just checked out the page to figure out who you crazy people are…

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Tattoo on the neck = I do not have a career*, nor do I ever plan to pursue one

*career excludes rapper, porn star, and the like

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Landon, there’s a message board on the FB page where people (those who aren’t scared) have identified themselves

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oog, landon… one day. Even though I like you I swear you and I are day-long argument waiting to happen. You are black and with a brand? And you wanted a tattoo of names all over your back, where you can’t even see it. But you turn your nose up at neck tattoos? Por que?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i love tattoos!! i only have one on my shoulder blade..i plan on getting atleast 4-5 more lol..i would never get anyones name on me thats just dumb..I would get my children’s names on me though..my man doesnt have any yet but wants to get a few…he actually said he was gonan get my name tatted on his wrist..but i told him not to do that 🙂 but yea my next tatt will be on the nape of my neck, i wanted to get stars on my knuckles but i dont think i should considering i still have be presentable at work lol… and i want a star cluster go from my upper back to my side…i have a vision..my mom just shakes her head…my mom nearly fell out when she saw my 1st tatt she kept trying to rub it off liek it was fake hahah

13 06 2008
Dustin

See, if I were crazy, I’d take that as a license to stalk. Fortunately, I’m sane (ish) and will continue to admire from the safe mask of the SBPH comments section. Well, and cyberstalk too. But there’s nothing wrong with that.

13 06 2008
Lindsay

Hey! I want a tattoo on the back of my neck! (haven’t gotten it yet, but it can be easily covered with a collared shirt/my hair).

And I’m on the facebook group. My name is the same as my name.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

yea, theres a discussion for people to say who you are on the facebook page, theres only like 18 people who IDed themselves there. People should really add that, but I wonder if some of them are scared. chickens…. 🙂

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Oooh, there’s a facebook group? I know I’m the new kid on the block but I wanna join! There’s no hazing involved is there? LOL

13 06 2008
Vanita

Yonnie: That was one of my fav dave chappelle skits…mad i cant watch it @ work tho, Im SURE to get fired…

13 06 2008
Landon

is it no different then wanting a lady in the street and wnating a complete freak in the bed…
will not be televised —
you for got..

Morehouse – IVy masters – Jack & jill – Greek – sigma – brand – New Yorker – anything else?

the tatoo was more abotu me connecting with my family who have passed on.. A lot of my family is dead… but i came to my senses…

a tattoo on your nexk is like buying 22 inch rims for a honda… just STUPID!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Even though there’s plenty of space for a great tattoo on the back, i don’t want one there because i want a tattoo I can admire, not one just to show off to other people. I mean thats why its on me, and not them. I like it too. Also I have a problem with this shit where people have babies faces tattooed on their body. That shit is stupid, unless the baby died, then i can cosign that. But if you have a 12 year old and you have that childs baby picture tattooed on your forearm, that shit is mad stupid to me.

13 06 2008
Lindsay

I think it depends on the placement. Yeah, if you get a tattoo right across your jugular where it can’t be covered, it’s stupid (and I’ve seen that, and it looks like the person has a rash).

Small, tasteful, back of the neck? I don’t see the problem.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Lindsay, yeah I’m actually torn on that one. I would never get one, but back of neck tattoos actually can be kind of hot, and can be covered. I tend to associate that with more artsy people vs. side/front of neck which is just hood, LOL.

13 06 2008
Landon

i joined the group… and i hide from no one…

i am just affraid this site will come to haunt me in 10 years when i run for senate
but at least i know i have the SBPH special interst group support

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oh so many reasons to hate you on resume landon, so many you give me….

its all fun though

13 06 2008
Knatural

Hi, I’m late, apparently. Never heard of pre-engagements but it sounds pretty stupid. Engagement ring are stupid to me. Waste of money.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Landon i don’t think R (Kelly) will do time on the criminal charges. the lil i’ve heard about it leads me to believe that the best corroborative witness they have is a $2 dollar saloon whore and the only thing more questionable than her fun box, is her credibility. from what i’ve heard the girl in the video and her mother are claiming that it’s not her. (payola im sure) my guess is maybe some civil charges will stick. it seems to be enough clust-fuckery kicked up on the criminal side to justify reasonable doubt to at least one juror. just my uninformed guess. we shall see shortly.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

you think we support you landon? I vote ficus every time. you got dustin though and DRLF-based interest group.
I wonder how facebook would change if you could enemy people in addition to friending them.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

right Lindsay..no to big not to small..i want a star on the back of my neck…no im not biting Rihannah that bicth stole my idea!!..but yea yoy can easliy hide it under hair at work and pull up your hair while your out and show it off. my ex hated my tattoo he says “women” dont need to cover their bodies in ink.. my repsonse”whateva nigga”.. man getting my 1st tatto was fun as hell..they guy whe did it was coooool…yea i love body art..i love men with tattoos..even though my man doesnt have any “yet” 🙂

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

So far i ahve one tatt and 5 piercings…:-) and i have more tatts to get..i cant wait!!! the tattooing process is relaxing to me..its like a ruff tickle..

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I used to love in high school that theres no legal age limit to get a tattoo. If you could find an artist, a seven year old could get a tattoo. Oh the simple pleasures in life back then.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

oh, and I hope R. Kelly rots in hell but he wont. That bastard wont even have the shame to move to a country where child molesting is the childs fault/not prosecuted/means marriage and stop paying his workers at his ranch/mansion.

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

My mom’s friend just broke up with her boyfriend of THIRTY YEARS. Another family friend is now engaged to his girlfriend. Since they’ve been dating 17 years, I will not take them seriously until we’re doing the Electric Slide at the reception.

My attitude toward engagements – HELLLLL NO! Don’t try to buy time with me! I hate weddings. When it’s time to get married, we’re getting the immediate family together, exchange vows at the church, then get a table for 20 at Big Wiliie’s BBQ Hut and call it a reception. I’m not blowing $50K on some bullshit ceremony, and he’ll only have to buy a wedding band – not the engagement ring. We’re married, or we’re not married. I will not be “engaged.”

13 06 2008
Lindsay

My tattoo (on the inside of my wrist) hurt like hell, and whenever anyone asks, I tell them exactly that.

I hear that because I got it there, it probably hurt more than if I got it, say, on my bicep, or a meatier part of my body (though I’m pretty thin, there’s not much meat).

This girl who works with me and who has 14 (!!) tattoos, even said “I couldn’t get one there.”

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

^^^I’ll probably do it on the cheap and get some all-white prom dress on clearance at Jessica McClintock. Hell yes, the wedding will be under $2K, $1K if my cheap ass can pull it off. Gotta save for a mortgage and college tuition for the baybays.

13 06 2008
Landon

I am sure i can add to that resume (WNBT)

I play golf – i believe in helping strippers pay for their tution – if i buy a female 4 or more drinks in the club the least i can get is a back rub LMAO ok joking…. but i love a nice back rub… We already said i am a Mama’s boy… and feel pressured to make sure my family approves of a lot of things i do… i believe we should segregate niggas and negros. Instead of sending our children to jail they should be sentenced to miltary commitment… anything else… if we ever get reparations you would have to take an african american history test to recieve your check…and have to score 81% or better… so if 10000 people take the test and only 5000 pass the 5000 get all the money earmarked…

question is it wrong to have a wieght clause in a pre nup? not saying i want one just asking… before member of team chunk jump on me and crush me…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahahah Will girllllll hahah that just reminded me of the tounge ring crazy at my school OMGGG..everybody n der mama had one…there was like this dude..i think his name was Steven who was a tattoo artisit and did peircings and he was well known in MOCO schools… he would charge ppl i think 30 bucks to get a tounge piercing and would do it at your home for you.. sooo i swear one week everyother person was talking retared because they got their tounge peirced by this dude…i remember when i was younger i wanted a tounge peircing because Scary Spice had one…i got my tounge done in beginning of 2007 just because i wanted something a new ahah yea i could have gotten another tatt..but i tell ya many a day my ring helped when i was bored.. i would play with that joint at work..now that i work in a office i have to wear a clear ball so no one will notice ahah

13 06 2008
Landon

not big willies BBQ…

but you are right – we would be better off saving the money and buying a home ( our 40 acres) …. we need more wealth in our community…

13 06 2008
Knatural

I love tattoos, depending on placement and size. I made a decision to never tattoo my arms, legs, chest or neck, so they could easily be covered, but…to each his own.

And Fuck R. Kelly – Chester Chester Child Molester

13 06 2008
Landon

going to the china man to get some bonless spare ribs anyone hungry? be back in 20

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

And where is Creole/Quadroon/Mulatto Chick here to tell us about how she was engaged to Chris, he’s a ho, he used and abused her, he’s using this blog to get chicks…I guess she has to find the computer at the library that Chris hasn’t blocked.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I always had a dream that i would follow in the family footsteps of going down to city hall and then maybe having a big cookout afterwards. Not applebees like my sister but thats only because I hate applebees. Only white if I find a cute dress at Marshalls. But now I heard of this historic synagogue in chinatown(DC) and I want to go there and have a full catholic ceremony. Or maybe Hindi. But thats b.c. i’m an ass.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

dickmatized, merri lee, always use the correct words for things. Dickmatized. Also its still school time for many people, even candian people and she has to go to crazy camp after school. She wont be on before 5pm when the activities bus drops her off.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Mrs. Epps, I had my tongue pierced for most of college. Funny thing is hardly no one knew, I never talked funny and I guess I just don’t flap my mouth open when I speak because it wasn’t very noticeable. Although piercings seem more “freakish”, I like that you can have your little fun and then take out the piercing and let it close up and be done (vs. the tat that lasts forever, even though I do have one tat as well and will probably get another). That being said, I do have to put on my medical hat now and say be careful…tongue piercings DO do damage to your teeth and gums.

13 06 2008
Muse

Damn Landon,

You couldn’t go one day without mentioning me huh?

This topic is so on point right now because I’m scheduled to attend 9 weddings between 08′ and 09 which has caused me to evaluate my views on marriage.

Even through both of my parents have been married and divorce twice (sad I know) I’m hopeful that I will make the right decisions when it comes to getting married. I’ve seen the mistakes both my parents made first hand and I do not want to repeat them. I just turned 26 three weeks ago but I’m in no particular rush to “find the one” because being young only happens once I strongly believe that the right guy will come along when I’m not looking. Besides I’m having a lot of fun dating and meeting different people.

The pre-engagement crap is a cop out for men who aren’t ready to settle down but they succumb to the pressures of some broad who lacks patience. When a man meets a woman he wants to make his wife and have his children, nothing will stop him from accomplishing that. I strongly believe that before couples get married they should be engaged for a year. During that time they need to attend marriage counseling, learn about each other’s family history (if they don’t know so already) and have a honest discussion about certain expectations such as money, sex, daily habits, religious beliefs, and how they expect to raise children. Marriage is 30% love, 70% business venture. If the two parties do not have an understanding then the marriage will fall apart. I also believe that people make it way too easy to get married and divorced these days. Folks need to approach their marriage as a life long commitment not some bullshit about when it gets difficult.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Yea the money some of these ppl spend on a damn wedding is nuts! fuck all that..the only ppl invited my wedding is my family(grandma, parents, aunts,uncles and 1st cousins and close friends, his mother,aunts,close cousins,daughter,and close friends) So yea fuck that 50k wedding…my dad said he would pay for our wedding too..im actually surprised since he;s the cheapest man i know.. he said we can have whatever we want as long as its reasonable..i can work with that!

I hate women who get tatts on their arms..that shit is for men and it makes them look manly lol

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Thank you for the further resume landon, i’m full of spite and bile now towards my stereotype of you.

mama’s boy

oh but pick me up some sesame chicken and one of those steak on a stick bits.

13 06 2008
Knatural

MERRI LEE! You stole my idea. Jerk.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I’ve seen some nice feminine arm tatts on women. But they specifically look feminine like vines, etc. Not those masculine bicep/forearm tats.

See Mrs. Epps, I’ll out do you, All I need is 1 witness down at city hall. It could even be the wino on the corner, as long as he can make his mark on the form.

13 06 2008
Muse

I also want to add that I don’t believe after the age of 25 in dating someone for 3+ years and not have a plan to get married. What’sthe point of a long term boyfriend. Either you want to be together or you dont. The exception is if both parties don’t believe in marriage. However it is rare to meet a woman who doens’t desire to get married.

In my personal life if I was dating someone for 2 years, after that point a discussion needs to start happening about where the relationship is going. Empty promises of marriage isn’t happening. I do believe men know in about a year or less if they want to marry the woman they are dating.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

and bring me back a Banana Congac BITCH!!

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Landon, I don’t think I’d put it in the pre-nup (or if I’ll even have a pre-nup…*sigh* innocent fantasies of lifelong love and marriage), but I can understand it being a deal breaker. I work too dayum hard on keeping up my figure and I can’t see myself being compatible with someone who isn’t the same. It’s different if my spouse were to get in an accident and lose a limb or something during the course of the marriage, that type of physical change can’t be controlled. But if my husband just completely stopped giving a fuck about himself and his health, we’ve reached a serious glitch in the matrix. I’d try to help him work through it, but…I just don’t know. And maybe my thoughts about that subject are another reason I’m not ready to be married yet, LOL.

13 06 2008
Merri Lee


Knatural (16:24:29) :

MERRI LEE! You stole my idea. Jerk.

I haven’t read all the comments yet. If you said it, I apologize. *passes knatural a Hennessey*

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Oh yeah, and I still haven’t found out the link to the facebook page…I feel left out 😦 *kicking rocks and puppies*

13 06 2008

GO BOSTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

ooh they got daquiris at the chinese spot now?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

The Doc…yea they will damage my gums and teeth..i know and eventually i will take it out and let it close up…wouldnt want to be the Mom with the tounge ring…hahah

yea and I actually had to show my Mom because she didnt notice it for the longest time.. she was like “What the fuck is that and when did you get it” lol

Muse-The pre-engagement crap is a cop out for men who aren’t ready to settle down but they succumb to the pressures of some broad who lacks patience. When a man meets a woman he wants to make his wife and have his children, nothing will stop him from accomplishing that. I strongly believe that before couples get married they should be engaged for a year. During that time they need to attend marriage counseling

right…the pastor that I want to marry us.. who is a very dear friend and was like a mother to me while i lived in florida wont marry a couple if they didnt go to marriage counseling before hand..so yea we gotta do that too..

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

or did we just send landon to the bar across the street too?, Shit is he going pass the grocery store, I need some milk and eggs.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised
13 06 2008
Muse

Pre-nuptial agreements are a good thing. Marriage is a business and back in the day people had contracts and stipulations about the assets in the marriage. Although I’m optimistic about when I get married, I know the reality that 60% of marriages end up in divorce. I have a nice little nest egg that includes property and I want that protected in the event that my marriage ends. I will also have no problem signing a pre-nup especially if I end up marrying an entrepreneur. What right do I have to that man’s assets and business ventures prior to us getting married if the marriage ends?

One of my girlfriends is engaged and what’s hilarious is that she and her fiancée actually signed an agreement about money, sex, physical appearances etc. I know from what they told me there was a clause about getting fat since both her fiancée and she are fitness buffs. They promised not to let themselves go.

13 06 2008

I believe in marriage…long haul, until death do us part marriage. My parents have been married for 27 years and have been together longer then that. My grandparents were married all of my life until they passed away..50 years! I was raised to know that marriage is what you make it, you are taking an oath under God.

Divorce is not an option. Unless he starts whooping your ass… and you call your uncles and death do you part.:)

13 06 2008
Merri Lee


Landon (15:12:21) :

R. kellys trial – http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/13/rkelly.closings.ap/index.html

Jury just went into deliberations….

WHat you guys think…

is he going to be found guilty, innocent or hung jury?

R. Kelly? Hung Jury? Can somebody go to the gutter and retrieve my mind, please? Thanks!

13 06 2008

I have never heard of pre-engaged bwahahahahahahaha had to be a pregnant 17 year old who made that up to sound cool to her friends.

13 06 2008
letinstar

pre engaged??!! there really is such a thing? and females really do fall for that?

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

That happened to my mom…when she and my father got divorced, he didn’t pay child support, and she hadn’t graduated from college because she got married to him and he wanted a house wife. They get divorced and my mom was dirt poor. My selfish dad didn’t even help us (his children) so my mom got two jobs and we were almost homeless. My grandad gave my mom his house in LA (the one my mom grew up in) and he moved to Missouri with his new wife. My mom worked from 8am-some time at one job and then had a graveyard shift at another for 6 months.

Consequentially, I have issues with getting married. I’ve decided that I will always have some kind of separate bank account where I can save money and I will work-no housewife fuckery for me.

The real engagement period is just to prepare for getting married. At least in my eyes. Once you get engaged, you decide on the date and then start planning the day after or even the day of. For some people, getting married is just going down to city hall. Personally, I want that engagement period where we plan the wedding together.

13 06 2008
Aisha

LMFAOMFOMSOMFOMAOFMAOMFAOMFAFMAFAO!!!!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA:FMAOFMALFAO!!!!

*cough

Anyway. Yeah, I’ve seen too many dumb bitches my age giving my age an even worse reputation (and claiming to be grown) by either:

1. Getting Knocked Up.
2. Skipping the rest of high school and subsequently, college, to get “engaged”.
3. Doing both 1 & 2 in any order at the same time.
4. Becoming strippers.
5. Becoming all-around social parasites.
6. Getting a job at Target or some other retail-store and claiming they work hard. (Target is a job you get in high school and college part-time to put money in your pocket, not a fucking career).
7. Becoming full-fledged social parasites.

Lucky for me, I don’t associate with these fucking sociopaths, so I’m actually growing the fuck up.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ahahha Ne-Divorce is not an option. Unless he starts whooping your ass… and you call your uncles and death do you part.

that would be the only reason other than if he cheated i would divorce. My mom and dad were married til i was two..he left us..mom got re-married and is happier than ever…my grandparents were married at 19 were married for 50 yrs until my grandfather died..my aunts and uncles have never been divorced either.. So i have faith that my marriage will last as well.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

Hmm…pre-engagement ring? I wonder if that’s what my ex-boyfriend gave me? Funny, it was stolen along the family ring he gave me, and all the other “good” jewelry he gave me too. A sign perhaps…

Long engagements are stupid, along with people that buy expensive (but still crappy) rings and have expensive weddings. I know way too many guilty people. I know of one couple who had 3 weddings over the course of a year to accommodate family and spent $60000+ on the big one! One of their friends, who I will assume had a huge expensive wedding, because she’s that type, is now getting a divorce after a year or so because her husband was so verbally abusive about her weight and body. Now that’s true love! The first couple is not that much better. I witnessed some shady behavior from the husband toward his wife…I’m waiting to hear about the divorce.

13 06 2008
Muse

NotBlonde I’m sorry your father put your family through that mess. Examples like yours and mine is the reason why I take marriage seriously. It’s not a joke and it is so imperative that people get to know the individuals they are getting involved with. My parent’s divorce was not nasty at all. They didn’t even use the courts. They had their own lawyers and discussed the division of property. Everything was fair and I don’t even think y parents spent more than 2 grand on attorneys. Now my father and stepmother have spent close to 200k on their divorce so far which is total bullshit.

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

Ok, read all the posts. knatural, gimme that Henny back!

13 06 2008

Aisha,

1. Getting Knocked Up.
2. Skipping the rest of high school and subsequently, college, to get “engaged”.
3. Doing both 1 & 2 in any order at the same time.
4. Becoming strippers.
5. Becoming all-around social parasites.
****6. Getting a job at Target or some other retail-store and claiming they work hard. (Target is a job you get in high school and college part-time to put money in your pocket, not a fucking career).**** lmaooooooooooooooo
7. Becoming full-fledged social parasites.

Do you live in my city?

13 06 2008
Muse

Shy girl the average wedding now costs about 20k. I debate whether or not I want a big fabulous wedding or something small on the beach somewhere. It depends on my husband. I do want the fabulous honeymoon. In fact I will take that over some big elaborate wedding. I don’t even like everyone in my family LOL.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

What right do I have to that man’s assets and business ventures prior to us getting married if the marriage ends?

Because marriage is a union. Two people become one. So, if he is an entrepreneur and the biz hits the big time – if you’ve been doing your job, you had a lot to do with that – whether that was disproportionately handling home (raising kids, cooking, cleaning, etc.) responsibilities while he focused on the business, being his pro-bono secretary/accountant/receptionist in the early days, or emotionally supporting him while he stresses over the success or failure of the business, etc. You can’t enter into a UNION and become ONE and still be like, “this is MINE and that’s YOURS.”

On the subject of pre-nups, I know the divorce rate is ridamndiculous, but marriage is still intended to be forever. If you think you’re going to get divorced from the outset, don’t get married. You get married with the notion that “this is the person I WILL be with forever.” If you get married with the notion that “this is the person that I MIGHT be with forever if s/he doesn’t gain too much weight, doesn’t change, doesn’t disagree with me too much…,” you’ve already defeated the purpose of the union in the first place.

The only time the pre-nup argument makes a little sense to me is when people liken it to insurance (you don’t intend to get in an accident, but you get insurance anyways). That’s a good argument…but I still don’t think its right.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

That happened to my mom…when she and my father got divorced, he didn’t pay child support, and she hadn’t graduated from college because she got married to him and he wanted a house wife. They get divorced and my mom was dirt poor. My selfish dad didn’t even help us (his children) so my mom got two jobs and we were almost homeless. My grandad gave my mom his house in LA (the one my mom grew up in) and he moved to Missouri with his new wife. My mom worked from 8am-some time at one job and then had a graveyard shift at another for 6 months.

damn girl…sounds familiar…my father hasnt paid child support in his life even though its court ordered…nigga never had a job..mom worked hard ass hell and it sucked because i rarely got to see her..i spent most of my time with my grandparents before i started 1st grade…my mom almost worked herself in to an early grave…thank go she is retiring soon along with my step-dad.. they deserve it..

Muse your step-mother crazy as hell..

13 06 2008

I don’t know I’m kind of split between divorcing if he cheated. I guess I have to be in that situation. My mother and father never had to deal with infidelity, but my grandparents did. I would have to be in that situation to really say.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Off topic: but I went to The Park at Fourteenth (DC) last night. Bertha was unleashed. The chicken, crabcake sliders, shrimp, and dranks are soooo yummy.

13 06 2008
letinstar

i personally do not believe marriage is for me….and quite frankly, don’t know many that last…mainly because most people i know like to get married but don’t want to work at the marriage…they usally always like to breed too, but that’s another story….

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

I understand people who see functional marriages feeling that their marriages will work too. But you have to be able to see that other people have never been around people in functional marriages, much less functional relationships. My mother never remarried and neither did my father. I don’t talk to my father’s side of the family so I have no idea if any of them are married/divorced, whatever. My mom was an only child and both her parents are dead and got divorced before that.

All of my friends parents are divorced/dead or some combination of the two. My now ex-boyfriend’s parents have been together for a long time but they are both uber-Christians who don’t believe in divorce. The now ex-boyfriend tells me they fight a lot and often sleep in separate bedrooms.

Aside from that, being pre-engaged is the most retarded thing I’ve ever heard of. I can’t imagine someone over the age of 20 falling for that bullshit. And Mrs. Epps, you do you and don’t worry about other people’s hangups. I have serious issues with getting married (clearly) but I am in no position to tell you shit about your engagment or impending marriage because I don’t personally know you.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Muse, save on the ceremony, spend for the vacation. Trust me.

13 06 2008
Omar

Pre-nups are fine, common law marriages suck it is like the anti-pre-nup.

@Doc – I wasn’t saying it was a deal breaker I just posited a different viewpoint, than the people are too young to do any-damn-thing logic, people used to get married young not to mention hold down full-time jobs as teenagers because they were raised to be responsible and contrary to popular opinion SOME people are still raised that way. It is just that no one looked at the potential positives of young marriages.

On the facebook page my name is the same.

13 06 2008
Muse

Yonnie you made some good points but most attorneys and financial advisors will recommend that someone with real assets get a pre-nup. I figure just sign it and put it away. If you guys never have to look at the document then great. You never know what will happen. I can tolerate a lot but abuse will be the deal breaker for me. Cheating use to be on the list but I keep going back and forth about that issue. Would I want to end my 20 year marriage over some one night booty? I’m not sure now that I’m older. How would I react if a found out my husband cheated? Now if he had a child outside of our marriage I will probably divorce him regardless of how long we’ve been together.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

@Muse:
I’m just upset for being around these people. They seemed to care more about the material things associated with the wedding instead of love and being practical about what a marriage means.

If I ever have an opportunity to get married, I’d be happy with city hall and a small party with close family and friends to celebrate. I can make my own dress. I don’t even care so much about engagement rings either. I’d use the money for something else, like making sure the possible future family is insecure financially.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Oh my god, crabcake sliders sound sooooo good. I wish we had something like that in the Bay.

Bethany decided to rear her ugly head last night. I had a giant blue cheese salad with extra blue cheese dressing, two “Adult” Brownies (not ganja brownies, they are these super-rich brownies from Andronico’s) and a whole bowl of pasta with chicken, peas, corn and tomatoes.

I got the itis real bad; literally passed straight out as soon as my head hit the pillow. lol

13 06 2008
Muse

Mrs. Epps, I told my dad that bitch was crazy when I was 8 years old but did anyone listen to me? NOOOOOOOOOO. This hoe threw a plate at my head when I was 10 and lied and said it was me throwing a temper tantrum. She also kicked me one time. When I told my mom about my step mother she got really crunk on her ass and the witch left me alone. I pretty much avoided speaking to her and since she worked long hrs and the house was big I only had to deal with her on the weekends when I wasn’t at my mom. She’s trying to be nice to me now but the bitch can fall off a cliff. My dad found out during the divorce that he is actually husband #5 LOL. He didn’t know that. Her other ex husbands have come out to say that she’s nutty. One of them tried to get her license to practice revoked.

Gosh I love my family.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

Sorry, insecure=secure 🙂

13 06 2008
Lindsay

The Park…eh.

I went once and knew someone who knew someone who was in VIP. I was just grateful to have a place to sit because we got there at midnight and I’d been up since 6 a.m.

13 06 2008
Muse

Shy girl I’m not going to lie: I love my bling and I love fabulous things. If the money is right then I have no problem throwing a big party to celebrate. It all depends on my husband. However we will not spend 100k on a damn wedding and we don’t have a fabulous home and money put away for retirement. I’m practical. Now if we are both rich then I have no problem with splurging. It’s all about living within your means. I hate watching Bridezilla because these stupid broads are going into serious debt over an event that will last a few hours.

13 06 2008
Landon

anyone here every watch cur your enthusiam with larry david..
there is an episode were he had a deal with his wife on there 10 year anniversary he could sleep with another woman… she agreed to it because she thought he couldnt pull it off…

would any one here do that?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Its all good NotBlonde..marriage is not for everyone…and yea im gonna always do me no matter how other people feel about hahah…I too dont talk to my father’s side.. i dont even know if my grandparents are still alive yet alone my father..i recently found my cousin on that side on myspace after 12 yrs not seeing each other…me and him were actually really cool back in the day..it sucks when you get ignored by your own flesh and blood.. they seriously act like my mother kept me away from them…i guess they just chose to dis-own me..o well fuck them…

I rather have a small beach wedding rather than the gigantic circus tent of a wedding..thats aight and i dont know that many people to do all that..

13 06 2008

notblonde have you ever been to crustaceans?

13 06 2008
Knatural

Since you guys are discussing weddings (GROOOOOSSSSSSS), I’ll share my story:
We went to the courthouse, been married now two years, and are planning a ceremony/meet-and-greet for our families. His family is from/lives in another country so the money we would have spent on a worthless dress you get one wear out of, a worthless ring* that I’ll have to remove each time I wash my hands, and worthless hideous bridesmaids’ dresses, will be spent on a fabolous fifteen days abroad. Save your riches for the vacation.

*Neither my other half nor I wear a ring. Guys: don’t spend your loan money on a trinket.

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Knat are you from Jamaica?
I have never heard the word stush used outside of the West Indies.

@ Muse
“Because marriage is a union. Two people become one. So, if he is an entrepreneur and the biz hits the big time – if you’ve been doing your job, you had a lot to do with that – whether that was disproportionately handling home (raising kids, cooking, cleaning, etc.) responsibilities while he focused on the business, being his pro-bono secretary/accountant/receptionist in the early days, or emotionally supporting him while he stresses over the success or failure of the business, etc. You can’t enter into a UNION and become ONE and still be like, “this is MINE and that’s YOURS.”

I triple dipple co-sign this.

13 06 2008
Knatural

And my mom’s making the dress.

13 06 2008

No landon, I would never condone the cheating.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

No Ne I have not. what is this Crustaceans and where is it?

13 06 2008

OMG GIRL!!!!! it’s in frisco. They have the best sea food. I could tell about a million other places too! I go at least every couple of months.

13 06 2008
Esquire

@ Dustin: Hey Boo boo

yes. I was/am THAT girl. lol

Take me as I am. Dont judge me.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAO@ Muse…the bitch threw a plate at your head HJELLL NAWW.. i dont care if i was 10 i woulda hit her ass back hahha

My inner fat girl Maria came out lastnight..when I ate a full plate of shrimp scampi, a really big burger, ceaser chicken salad, two slices of yellow cake, and a 40 oz of St.ides…yea…im ashamed….

Landon…umm no comment…im not gonna put all my dirty secrets out on the table.. im not drunk enough for that.. but like i said before i have experienced things that some 25 yr olds havent hahaha…coughs…next subies

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Cheating is never ok, by the way. That just seems like a dumbass excuse for a man to say that his woman is so in this pocket that she’ll let him step out, even if it is just one time.

Cheating is grounds for divorce. Period.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

@Muse:

I agree with you on all of your points.

These girls I know have professional degrees, but they seem to define themselves by their engagement rings and weddings, put all of their money into the event, and then have really shaky marriages that may or may not last.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

*in his pocket

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Ooo, Ne. Imma look it up on the internets and hook it up this weekend. 🙂

And…oh my god, why the fuck is there some creepy-looking hood ass nigga in the Engineering Library leering at me?

13 06 2008
Knatural

@ Deesigner – I’m from DC but have too many West Indian friends. I just love that word. It’s better than saying ‘boujie’.

13 06 2008

I want a quiet wedding with people I am close to, a beautiful honeymoon and and a ring that he thinks I should have. I am not into the big ring bling. What matters is the meaning behind the ring and his love is enough. I would prefer to have a necklace because I can’t keep a ring on 24-7.

13 06 2008
Ethel

In answer to recent inquiries, yes, women really DO fall for the pre-engaged line…especially the young women.

I met a guy when I was 19 and he gave me a pre-engagement/I love you ring. At least I had some sense to continue to wear it on my right hand, [even tho’ my friends would continue to tell me I should wear it on the left, thus supporting the myth that this was actually a committed/mature relationship] We dated and then lived together; when the relationship finally crashed and burned I tried to give the ring back…because that’s how I roll. He said he wanted me to keep it and told me I couldn’t sell it. Being the obedient person back then [and, yes, he WAS a control freak] I let the ring sit in my jewelry box for a few years. I later donated it to a silent auction for physically challenged children, thus getting rid of it guilt-free while helping the children and getting a tax write-off.

What did you learn Dorothy?

Well I learned that:
a) the gift of jewelry from men does NOT equal commitment
b) the acceptance of jewelry does not mean one is necessarily obligated to the giver
c) there is no such thing as pre-engagement
d) if you choose to let your Ex affect your behavior after you’ve broken up, it’s your problem, not his/hers.

Many thanks to Chris for this post. It made my day and I’m hoping he has a better one moving forward.

13 06 2008
Esquire

NotBlonde..get up and run.

I dont think there is anything wrong with a big wedding if thats what the two of you agree upon and you ahve the money for it. What kills me is the couple who is renting, driving a 92 Ford escort, has no savings, but takes out a loan to finance a 70,000 shindig.

Daddy’s wallet= BIG OL PARTY

Our wallet at the time of our marriage=City Hall, trip to Atlanta’s Six Flags.

If you aint got it, and pops aint paying, take your butt to the courthouse and save up for a house.

13 06 2008
Muse

Crustaceans is so yummi NotBlonde. Next time you are in LA go there!

Esquire I understand your point. I would much rather have a one month honeymoon around the world than spend a bunch of money to entertain folks.

However….I LOVE jewelry! My husband doesn’t have to wear a ring but gosh darn it I want one!

13 06 2008
Landon

Grounds for break up –

looking through my emails or cell phone

opening my mail
cyber stalking
sneaking onto my gmail account or facebook account
wearing grandma draws…

out side of that everything else you can work past.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

If you aint got it, and pops aint paying, take your butt to the courthouse and save up for a house..

yep and i wish my cousin listened to me when i told her that when i was 15..smh…they spent a pretty penny on their wedding still paying for that shit…im just happy my DADDY is being generous but if he wasnt..it would have been just us to in Hawaii on our wedding/honeymoon hahah

13 06 2008
Knatural

Landon – wearing granny panties is grounds for breaking up AHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA dumbass. What about how men wear drawers so worn your nuts have no privacy. Wearing drawers that are basically just elastic bands. And hole-ridden. Oh, but they’re clean, right?

13 06 2008
Soup Kitchen Scoundrel

Prenuptial agreement…it is a successful engaged/married person’s best friend.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

acck my inner old lady is named Ethel! My fat girl is named Debra and that bitch is strong as hell. I can’t even call her inner fat girl cuz that bitch is half out. I think she lifts weights when I sleep. Shes a mean and evil hussy, debra.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Men,
I will attempt to explain why some women AND parents view the ring as a big deal.

1. To Brag to thier friends
2. The more intricate, the more time he spent really trying to get something I have to wear on my hand the rest of my life. (or at least for 10 years, til you upgrade)
3. This man will be helping to take care of me and my children, possibly parents. He is financially able to do so? We are a team, but does he have his stuff together enough to afford me, my family, etc. Does he have enough saved to make a big purchase and have some left over? This is important to me because if not, why does he think he has it together enough to get married? If all you can afford is a $599.99 Clearance ring from Sears, you probably shouldnt get married. Kids costs a lot. Families cost a grip.

I would have accepted a piece of dust from my husband, but was extremely satisfied by the ring I recieved. I didnt like it at first, because I am a petite woman and have small hands. I thought it was a little big. I just wasnt used to wearing a lot of jewelry. A lot of women kept telling me oooh he did good. So I asked the old lady who damn near ran me down in Sam’s Club. “Whats the big deal” When she put it to me like that…I felt a lot better and a lot more at ease about my ring. That my friends is why the ring is a medium sized deal, it shouldnt be a determinate, but it says a little about the man who bought it.

disclaimer: not to be confused with dummies who go broke buying a ring they cant afford, in which case it is determinative. DO NOT MARRY A FINANCIAL DUMMY.

13 06 2008
Landon

its not sexy when one ball is hanging out… ???

holy draws i thought that was our equivalant to fishnets.. 🙂

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

On the subject of cheating – I’ve been told by my male friends not to discuss this anymore, but what the hell…

Based on my own non-scientific study of the matter, the vast majority of men have cheated on their wives at some point during their marriage. The study includes men that I know personally, as well as famous figures (MLK, Bill Cosby, etc.). When I came to this realization that most men cheat (early 20s), my attitude was that I was never going to get married. Then I fell in love and the statistics went out the window and I was completely overcome by the very natural feeling (urge) that I wanted to get married, make babies, and grow old with that man. Needless to say that shit didn’t work out but the point is that one day I will meet the person that I’m supposed to marry, make babies, and grow old with, and the ugly math says that odds are he’ll cheat on me at some point. I will be crushed. We may separate. Go to counseling. He might get cut. And divorce is still a possibility. But if I am saying now, that without exception, I will divorce any man that cheats on me…then I might as well not get married.

And to all of you who say that “my dad never cheated on my mom, my uncles never cheated…” This is a very personal and embarrassing topic that people don’t discuss freely. You gotta wait until 3am and about 4 or 5 bottles in to learn this info and when someone has completely let their guard down.

13 06 2008
Say it isn't so

5 years dating 16 years marriage 1 child = 5 years divorced. Marriage is a legal union. Nothing more. I left and took nothing. Got tired of being cinderella in my own damn house…as I start my life over as though I were a teenager. Ladies make SURE you have your own separate account(s)…and yes ALL men are dogs, and we are the cats.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Male equivalent to granny panties as a dealbreaker? Skidmarks. Raggedy draws is one thing but if you can’t wipe your ass right you got to get gone.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Landon – is excess pubic hair grounds for break up? Sorry. I saw it on the sex and the city movie.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Yay, thanks for the link willnotbetelevised.

Hmm, I don’t agree that cheating is a point blank grounds for divorce. I think stupid mistakes can be worked through. But when abuse is involved, or someone has a complete personality shift, then we’ve got issues.

13 06 2008
Esquire

dang grandma draws?
Sometimes she must breathe. You cant wear thongs everyday. Thats not healthy.
unless of course you meant the big droopy ones, in which case, ladies, tie them around your neck and kill yourself.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Male equivalent to granny panties as a dealbreaker? Skidmarks.

(spitting out soda, almost choking)

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Man Landon i had an ex that would do that shit..think i was tlaking to other dudes when i wasnt…he would be like Who is such in such.. im like nigga thats my little cousin you asshole..and if i were talking to dudes…you sure as hell wouldnt find the evidence in my phone..haha

it was too funny one night though..I was sleep and my man was still up and left his cell in the bedroom..its like 2 in the fucking morning and his shit goes off waking me up and i looked at the face and it said some chick’s name..so me being 1/2 sleep 1/2 pissed that it woke me up…i let voicemail pick it up.. 5 mins later bitch calls again!!!! im like fuck naw.. so i take his phoen to him and said somehting like “Get you hoes in check and stop calling late” he gave me the WTF face and i walked away…
soim back sleep again and wake up again to this nigga in the livingroom loud ass hell on the phone..i go out in the living room and was like “BOBBY AND WHITENY SHUT THE FUCK UP IM TRYNA SLEEP” he starts laughing and put the phone on speaker and said ” A yo my girl just called you whitney” tell me why his boy was on the other line cracking up and started talkin in a girl voice..lol..i felt dumb for the rest of the night

13 06 2008
Muse

My husband would be wise not to cheat on my. An angry Muse is a dangerous Muse…

He needs to communicate with me if I’m on freaky enough…But then again I heard from my male friends that there is nothing better than new pussy…

But is that new pussy worth your marriage?

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Oh yea, and for people saying someones been married for so long, I need stats on happiness. My parents have been married for nearly 30 years but I was probably the only 8 year old wishing their parents would get a divorce. Almost happened last year and we (the family)were all like FINALLY, but didn’t happen. (yes these are my biologics, so.) I don’t want to be in a marriage where we’re sleeping in seperate rooms and i hate this mofo but I wont dip out (or esp. that staying for the kids bs. If you’re staying for the kids then you should try to pretend like you get along for the kids too- otherwise what’s the point).

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Esquire, that post about the ring is dead on! I mean, not that I need it, but it’s nice to know you’re smart enough to have disposable income available, and further smart enough to want to spend some of it on me 😉

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

(or esp. that staying for the kids bs. If you’re staying for the kids then you should try to pretend like you get along for the kids too- otherwise what’s the point).

Co-sign

13 06 2008
shabooty

grounds for break up — when your cunt lips start to resemble a 5 dollar footlong roast beef on cheese and herb spices bread.

13 06 2008
Landon

ummmmm — shaved or brazilian is a must…

i dont think black men have to worry abotu it too much because we nappy – but i guess guys should make sure they dont have a rain forrest down there..
lol… but for a lady — hairless is a must… for be at least… a lil strip is cool i guess… unless she wants to get fancy and have my intials down there, LMAO…

13 06 2008

Not all men are dogs.

I have been cheated on and my heart has been broken, However I am not going to make a statement like “All men cheat” because just like there are cheating women, there are cheating men. There are faithful women, and there are faithful men. The issue is, are you passing him up because he is 5’5″. LOL. ( I am guilty of the short man disease)

13 06 2008
Landon

shabooty (17:48:00) :

grounds for break up — when your cunt lips start to resemble a 5 dollar footlong roast beef on cheese and herb spices bread.

just died DOA 1:50

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon I hope you are joking or that your attractiveness exceeds your demands because you sound ridiculous.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

Is it wrong for a girl to propose to a guy?

13 06 2008
Landon

muse? what u talking bout?

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Landon…shut your face.

13 06 2008
shabooty

shyGirl it’s wrong if she’s “weekend pussy” and proposes 🙂

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon i hate you hahahha

Wearing drawers that are basically just elastic bands. And hole-ridden. Oh, but they’re clean, right?-Knat

thank you!! my mna calls those is comfortables… nigga no.. one day he will come home and al his old ratty t-shirts,underware and socks will be burning in the front lawn..like in Waiting to Exhale…I cant stand he’s t-shirts dammit..like why cant he wear Polo’s 24/7 geez.. and it so funny.. im walk the dog in my pj’s which is basically shorts and a shit.. and he is wearing basiclly the same shit but says he is “not dressed” WTFF that shit irrks me hahah..sometimes i dont think he’s comfortable in his own skin its hilarious…he sounds like a damn woman..he wont walk out the house in a wife beater and or his boxers like c’mon man..let your chest and balls breath!!!

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

shyGirl: I think most people take issue with it because they think that if a woman proposes to a man, then something is wrong in their relationship and the guy doesn’t really want to get married.

I say, whenever you feel like it would work, go ahead and propose. “Proposing” marriage is just that: hey do you wanna get married?

Personally, I’d like to get the whole man-proposes to woman in very sweet, silly way but that isn’t for everyone.

13 06 2008
Omar

I wish I knew where to find rings for $599.99 three years ago.

13 06 2008
Muse

Thank you Not Blonde…Can you believe this clown?

Landon probably has a belly that hangs below his ball and smells like old cheese.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

LOLOLOL@ Muse. Ewwwwww. The male gunt.

13 06 2008
Landon

Am i wrong that i wont my lady well groomed down there… is that askign to much? I mean its already not attractive to look at, the least you can do is fix the lawn…

13 06 2008

omgoodness. I have asked my guy friends about the shaved thing. I guess it just depends on the guy so I ask the guy.

Most guys say trimmed.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

I definitely agree that though marriage should be a complete partnership you should still have your plan for how to survive on your own. But I’m still a bit on the edge about pre-nups. To me it’s not only saying that I think something could happen to my marriage, but it’s also saying “I’m not completely sure the person I’m marrying won’t turn into a complete PSYCHO and stick me for all my paper should something happen down the road”. Maybe it’s a naive view, but part of me would like to think I was getting into a relationship with a like minded, mature person, and we’ve discussed things and know and RESPECT each other well enough to the point where if it ever came down to it, a split would be amicable. I guess I just gotta make sure I can afford a good lawyer, LOL.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse – i am on facebook page, why dont you look at my picture…. and tell me if my stomach is hanging down…

i ll wait..

i am no body builder… but i do my part to stay in shape… i ll even take your friend request for 20 minutes so you can look at my pics before i erase you as my friend..

13 06 2008
Esquire

Landon: Hairless?
do you like young girls? Is this why you are so interested in whats going to happen to R.Kelly?
I kid I kid.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

I think guys who demand hairless women are secretly pedophiles. Guranteed I often like to remove everything for hygien or general irritation that i have hair anywhere but on my head but there’s something slightly off about having no hair. And as much as I love black men, I hate your chest naps. hate them hate them hate them. Which is why I love the many hairless black men. (and for all guys, if you only grow hair on your nipples and no where else on your chest, get electrolysis, that shit is weird and freaky. Hairy nipple mutant). I kinda hate pubic naps too but only when my face gets close and the curls try to jump up in a nostril or eyelid. Down boy! down. Can guys just run a lawn mower over that? keep it down, I dont want it to reach out and grab me.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon your an ass and i like ya!…

Shabooty..rolls eyes…you so stooopid!!

13 06 2008
Landon

shaved is tought because if you are going there like you should if she is your woman… the three days after stubble is not COOl…

13 06 2008
shyGirl

@Shabooty:

I’m guess you have experience with that, huh? hehehe…

13 06 2008
Landon

NO NO NO its more about pleasing my girl why i dont like hair down there…

swallowing a damn PUB hair will kill any moment not even viagra could keep you hard after that.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

LMAO, Landon that goes both ways though. And really, it makes things better for the “groomed” person as well. People get a lot more into certain “activities” when they’re not gagging on pubes, keepin it real!

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon I’m judging your comments collectively. You are a fuck-tard

I don’t need to look your ass up on facebook. In my mind you are a tool.

13 06 2008
shabooty

ugh….. usually when it’s a landing strip it leads to the GUNT

13 06 2008
Esquire

Omar:

http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_04428483000P?mv=rr

This could be yours for the economical value of 499.99

If you want to splurge:
http://www.sears.com/shc/s/p_10153_12605_04491098000P?mv=rr

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

a well kempt lawn is part of basic grooming. No one should have to hunting through the bush to find a pole or a hole. The only equipment you should need is condoms and assorted sexual toys/lubes/powders/playthings.

Sex sans machetes!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

blad eagles? c’mon Landon..like foreal..why would you want 10 yr old pussy…no boo trimmed is good but bald eh…i’ve done it beofre and it itched like hell when it started growing back ahha so i dont suggest this ladies hahah

13 06 2008

i would like for a guy to shave the little taliban under their arms. I hate it i hate it i hate it

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

You have no idea how much of a pain in the ass it is to keep a shaved pussy. Waxed, yes. Shaved, no. I’m not shaving every day down there just because some guy has a pedo-fetish.

I do Hawaiian waxes where they leave the bit on the middle-it’s kind of like an extended bikini wax without looking like a fucking Barbie doll.

I’m out for an hour, must go do work.

13 06 2008
shabooty

are you all e-hoes, or nappy dugout pros?

blagh…im with landon on this one.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

hmm that is true but the hair is there for a reason. If you aren’t doing certain extracurriculars theres going to be too much friction. I don’t have sex on the floor cuz I dont want rugburn on my ass, same goes up front, we can’t both be smooth.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Muse be QUIET before Landon takes back his promise ring.

Wait, I just read what you wrote Landon. Clarify please: you want her really completely hairless? If you are doing it right, there is no hair in the area where your mouth needs to be.

13 06 2008
Landon

I AM A TOOL…

tools is what help seperate us from primates…

You can say what you want but i am honest. Hell my female friends listen to me because i give them the real deal no BS advice…

That is what i like… you like nice size dick right and a guy who can do it right and so on.. i like it tight and limited hair….

Just because you got BICKWheat between your legs and cornroll down there in the summer time dont get mad at me 🙂

13 06 2008
Esquire

i would like for a guy to shave the little taliban under their arms. I hate it i hate it i hate it

Just passed out and hit my head on the keyboard

13 06 2008
Muse

I like being hairless I just feel very clean and the hair grows back super soft. I go to this lady named Marissa at a place called “Wax” on Melrose. I’ve seen Kim K there a few times.

Marissa is the best. She uses a numbing spray before she waxes you.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Ne’,

I know that not all men are dogs. I don’t think that the man who has been married for 40 years and cheated once in year 7 is a “dog.” All that I’m saying is that if you took a room full of 100 random HONEST married men, more than 50% of them have cheated once.

I might’ve slept on the 5’5″ guy though….or the one with the jacked up teeth.

13 06 2008
shabooty

aahahah
their pussy looks like they got don king in a leg lock.

13 06 2008
Landon

BICKwheatt = buckwheat between your legs
you know my TOOL DUMB ass cant spell with out spell check 🙂

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

so landon, shabootybaby, did you guys clear the field? Or do you like your women to sport the pubic floss?

Ladies, NEVER SHAVE. That shit itches for days. Nair, wax are both much better options.

13 06 2008
shyGirl

I like guys to be completely shaved…:)

13 06 2008
Muse

Once again Landon speaks ignorance.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Eh, when you get the waxing done regularly the grow-back itch stops being a problem. I love the clean feeling and keep it up for myself (and I think I just have issues with body hair, LOL)…but I’d be darned if a man demanded that of me! LOL

13 06 2008
Esquire

thats for the clarification. There is a diff b/n childlike baldness and nappy dugout. If you cant easily put on a bathing suit, you need to shave, wax, chop, or whatever it takes.
I was getting alarmed Landon. Men who want it all gone, truly scare me. Brazilians to me look like porno star material.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i would like for a guy to shave the little taliban under their arms. I hate it i hate it i hate it

hahahah i snorted ahhaha omg! my man trims his underarm hair thank god!!! and he trimms down below as well…

Landon-Just because you got BICKWheat between your legs and cornroll down there in the summer time dont get mad at me

DEAD…

13 06 2008
Landon

hairs fall out… from friction of your face… unless you just want the guy purely concentrating on the clit (not always the move)…

if you in 69 position or she is sitting on ya… umm hair will be around.. SO NO HAIR PLEASE..

so muse you go bald down there but you yapping at me for sayign i want my girl to go bald? I am so confused…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Yea thats the same for waxing every where, the more you do it the less and lighter it comes back. I have huge swaths of my legs where hair doesn’t even grow anymore thank you wax. Reason number 2 to use wax down there.

13 06 2008
Muse

I like my men groomed

13 06 2008
shabooty

if there’s no grass play in the mudd?

13 06 2008
Omar

“Hairy nipple mutant” LMAO

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Oh my god, never nair down there. I got a seriously bad rash. And if you wax, go to a professional.

Men, if your woman is waxing correctly, there should be no hair where your mouth goes and plenty where it shouldn’t be. I hate looking down there and seeing my bald-ass pussy like I’m 10 again.

13 06 2008

Nair down there…ARE YOU CRAZY? I do waxing with a touch up shave during the week.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Oh just for clarification – Brazilian wax is with the landing strip, a Japanese wax is the complete baldy. Continue…

13 06 2008
Esquire

hairs fall out… from friction of your face… unless you just want the guy purely concentrating on the clit (not always the move)…

This is true. But Ive also choked on a hair or two myself. I would slap my man if he shaved that hair off. I would feel like I was making love to a big grown 13 year old.
Really I dont want you concentrating on just that area, but I dont need you all up in my belly button region either. There is no sensation and you are basically just pissing me off trying to do something you saw at 2am on HBO on one of those soft porns.
Am I the only one who feels like this? cant be

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Listen, not Nair all the way down, esp if you’re sensitive. But for the top part, its the quickest and easiest way to do it yourself (except i dont use nair I use Veet). Yea, never self wax, I hate inflicting my cooter on other women but fuck, I self waxed once and made myself cry. And it wasnt good. Self wax your legs or your lips but leave the sweet spot to the professionals.

13 06 2008
Muse

OMG not blond did you just say pussy LMAO…Sorry

Landon your existence annoys me.

13 06 2008
Landon

pubic floss?

is that like a landin strip?

i am surprise MUSE clears the field down there… revealing the markings of SATAN to her men…

but she is prob like a praying mantis and kills them after sex.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

hairy nipple mutant? what da fuckk? haha

i wax my legs, under arms and cooter…the end..

btw landon on the facebook group is your name the same…

13 06 2008
shabooty

i dunno i think there is a high correlation between stanky queefs and not shaving it all off… cause the hair traps in the stank vagine smells….

13 06 2008
Esquire

I love NotBlonde’s use of the word Pussy.
I feel like 6th grader giggling at it.

13 06 2008

omg I hate hairy balls. It is the worst. I won’t even tell you that you need to fix it, I just wont be putting my face down in the rainforest.

Keeping the balls and the shaft region trimmed is just good manners.

13 06 2008
Landon

MUSE i exist to balance your power of EVIL with my POWER of good…

SHABOOTY…. tag you get her now, lol.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

if i went to a skydiving class and the instructors told me that 1/2 of the class was going to crash and burn, i wouldn’t be breaking my frickin neck to do it. (no pun) if i wanted to give half of my money and other assets away, id just donate to charity. …and in the business (IT IS A BUSINESS) of marriage divorce lawyers are the real winners and women come in a close second. Men we’re fucked. (except in the way we like it) …and by the way men (fathers, grooms) just for the signing event you have your financial ass handed to you on a platter. if you’re gonna do it forego the bullshit big ass wedding. it’s a cluster fuck of mammoth proportions.

i read a young lady who commented earlier about not having a big wedding. good for you and particularly the men in your life. trust me it wouldn’t make your marriage any better, just give you some more bills to fight about. another woman commented earlier about gender roles, how they’ve changed and their effects on the need for marriage today. great observations.

if you’re gonna have a big assed ceremony anyway, have the sene to register at Citibank instaed of macy’s and neiman. buy a house or hedge fund. fuck eleventenn thousand dollars to impress friends and family and put on a big fuckery of fronting and carrying on.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Ne,
I have to go. you have just caused a very big disruption from my office. I hate closing the door because it gets hot in here. I have to get some work done.

well, fuck it. Its friday.

13 06 2008
Landon

YES…
my name is the same…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

mostly nair etc is for swimsuit maintenance.

Aww muse, you have to enjoy landon, enjoy the needless numerous arguments you know you are going to have with his ass. And landon, I’m sorry babe but I think that in real life I would probably find you to be an asshole. But one of those likeable assholes that are so far from my mindset that you’re almost enjoyable. Kinda like the incredibly racist. Strangely enough, assholeery is a common denominator of many of my male friends. Does that mean I”m crazy?

13 06 2008

landon and muse sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g….

13 06 2008

I am sorry esquire!

13 06 2008

I thought it was just me that laughed when notblonde typed pussy. It’s like charlotte from satc saying pussy.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

come on landon, 2 seconds thought, pubic floss= pubes hair caught between the teeth. Also you did not answer my question. Hows your grooming?

13 06 2008
Esquire

Damn Prime,
you cant register at a BANK. Thats just as tacky as those “Wishing well” weddings.

BUT in your defense, I have been told that only people down south think it is tacky to give money as opposed to gifts. Is this true? People gave us money, but we didnt ASK for it.

13 06 2008
Omar

@Ne-I understand groomed but hairy balls women may have to live with because taking razor too close to balls is like bungie jumping-not worth the risk.

13 06 2008
Landon

The funny thing is i am one of the nicest guys you meet… anyone who knows me will tell you if you come over to my house… i will always make sure you have food or i will cook more food so you can have dinner… i always have DRANK and other stuff at my house…

I am loyal to a fault
and i like to have WAY TOO MUCH FUN…. down for anything sport related… name a sport i have at least tried it once… love to travel… i can handle my DRANK like no ones else so you never have to baby sit me…. and i can get along with anyone not names MUSE…

YOU LOVE ME OR HATE ME no in between 😉

13 06 2008
Esquire

I hate all of you.

People I hate the most on here
Chris.
Muse
Ne
Omar
Shabooty
Willnotbetelevised
NotBlonde: Just for that one use of the word pussy that I cant stop laughing about

You all can chip in after I get fired

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

see ya in divorce court bitches.

13 06 2008
Landon

Its not tacky for geting money – esp since so many people live together before getting married they usually dont need anything but giving money would help you PAY for the wedding or buy a place…

they have mortgage registry now

I want MONEY bump the gifts….

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i feel a new love connection going on..hmm

13 06 2008
Muse

Ne you landed yourself on the go cut your clit off list.

13 06 2008

I didnt say weed wack the balls or even shave… but hold the balls….caress the balls and tell them you are going to be using these shiny silver scissors to snip some of the daddy long legs.

If you want ball action…trimm that mess.

13 06 2008
Landon

i love pandora… Az Yet Last night is on… ah memories…. from back when i was pure like fresh fallen snow… sighhh

13 06 2008
Knatural

Omar – Titanium rings are less expensive, more durable than soft-ass overrated platinum and just as beautiful.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

esquire im glad im on your good list

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Omar, who says we have to live with it? I had an ex who used Nair for men down there, LOL. I think it’s a good look personally, I’ve gotten used to bumping hairless uglies.

13 06 2008
ishouldbeworking

I’d just like to say that the idea of pre-engagement is about as ignorant as someone being a little bit pregnant. Either you are or you aren’t. That is all.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

shoot give me money as gift beofre a blender!! we already got one…but we could use a nice grill 🙂

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Damn! How did I not make the Most Hated list?

hangs head in shame

I’m gonna step my game up. I’m gonna make you hate me Esquire!!

13 06 2008

hey hey muse that is not nice. See you after school.

:punches fist in hand and makes this face:

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esqiure, PMC is down south (i like refering to myself in second person) and i’ve never heard of that. (not to say its not true, i wouldn’t doubt) if it is i can assure you it’s something women conjured up and care about. …a man, not so much. i just always thought it was cute to tell people that you were registered at a bank or some such. (denoting cash donations) fuck burberry’s.

13 06 2008
B4Prez

Personally, I’m not too particular when it comes to the gardening, as long as it’s not looking abandoned. But I have to say, a little less IS best!

But more importantly, since we’re talking about grooming (btw, what does this have to do with engagements??…i can’t and i won’t) how about you’ll stop leaving weave in my sink!!! How in the hell did weave end up on my kitchen counter when you never left the bedroom? And don’t use my brush either!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

and hairless is the only way they go in the mouth.
nope, i do the same shit landon, but I still would argue with you all damn day, you work my nerves in a love and hate kind of way. Ahhh i think you may be related to me, all the men in my family work my nerves but you gotta love em. See you at the reunion!

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse: I thought only somali queen was on that list..

did yall really scare her off this thing…. or is she just blotting against chris?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

you dont have to shave it all off but keep it close cut..not tryna choke on a pub…that shit aint cute and it ruins the rest off the night because im to busy trying to hack up the one strand of hair hahah

13 06 2008
Landon

B$PRez.. thanks now you got me using my asthma PUMP, lol

13 06 2008
Deesigner

@Knat,
Titanium Rings= smells like Giorgio.
I couldn’t resist.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

people can spend thousands of dollars on a wedding (in many cases much of it borrowed) and don’t have pot to piss in or a window to throw it out. W.T.F. horse and carriages and shit and divorced next yr. same time and cant afford a lawyer cause they are still paying for the bullshit wedding. go figure.

13 06 2008
Muse

Are you still speaking to me Landon? Jesus. Where are the Zetas when you need them.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

ewwww i hate using other peoples hair brush/comb. Yuck. but i’m natural babe, thats not my hair in your sink. My hair stays where it is until I tell it to leave.

13 06 2008

Landon reminds me of my ex. We had the best realtionship I ever had, however I had to let him go cause his dick was little!

13 06 2008
Esquire

No No,
its never tacky to get it. I think its tacky to ASK for it. Like, hey come celebrate my union of love and bring some moolah to cover your plate.

Things I think are tacky:
Asking for money (ew)
Bell ringers (huh)
Jumping the broom (we are not slaves)
Cash Bars (WTF)
Marry your Baby daddy Day. (Did anyone SEE this in ESSENCE?)
Telling everyone you lived together prior to getting married. (I prefer to just lie so that grandmas and old relatives dont freak out)

But I am just a southern belle. We arent very progressive.

13 06 2008
Landon

OUCh… Ne…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

somali queef got booted for being boring. You love me esquire, you can have my job, when you get fired, I just quit and my office is cold so you can shut the door and enjoy everyone here again.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Deesigner – I don’t know fragrances, but that must be bad AHAHAHAHAHAHA

13 06 2008
zoso

@ landon: The queen was banned by Chris.

Anybody notice landon still hasn’t answered willnotbetelevised’ question?

13 06 2008

Yea don’t use my brush or my tooth brush…. That is grounds for divorce Separation!

13 06 2008
Landon

Damn Ne what did i do to you…?

i thought as long as you can touch your belly button as a guy you should be cool? no?

13 06 2008

Vienna sausage little. I .. AM .. SAD .. STILL. He was a great man and only 5’10”.

13 06 2008
Landon

what was the question?

13 06 2008
Esquire

MUSE:

you keep rolling higher and higher up my list. I am truly going to get fired. Dont care right now though. And you know good and damn well where the Zetas are…at the buffet.

Mrs. Epps, you and Yonnie are on there too. Your shenanigans have not been forgotten.
I will say I am missing Sister Toldja right now.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

B4Prez…my face turned red laughing so hard.. OMGGGG… its to funny.. for the record i dont wear weave i got my own hair!! but yea you could say i shed like a damn cat and hair will be all over the bathroom floor and my man hangs his head…he’s like damn women like are you going bald ahahha..im like NOOOOO lol well lets just say we have our own bathroom mine is the girl smelling one with hair on the floor and bra’s hanging on the shower curtain rod while he has the dull, moldy balls, doodoo smelling bathroom ahahha.. like this nigga seriosuly forgets the reason why the have the fan int he bathroom haha..he will use it and then close the smell in so wheni go to change the towels in there its all musky n shit..whyyyyyy

13 06 2008
Landon

are we related?

is that the question?

i am fron my NY but my fam is from SC and Ga… (augusta)

13 06 2008
Omar

@Doc – Nair for men ;-(

…at least he’s brave, he did all that for you and you dumped him shame, SHAME!!

13 06 2008
Muse

Esquire I’m saying…Zeters and Sigmers are kinda lame. Landon isn’t helping the stereotype

13 06 2008
Landon

Ne

OUCH… like did you feel it? Wow… vieen sausage…(hard?)

SMH sorry…

13 06 2008
Esquire

(eyeing landon) I know you family is not from North Augusta SC/Augusta GA…

I used to have a good friend who went to USC-A.

13 06 2008

I was paying you a compliment. I didn’t say you had a little weiner, are you guilty?

13 06 2008
Esquire

you=your

thats for you Prime.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Damn, Vienna Sausage? Bertha woke up.

13 06 2008
Esquire

ahhh..the secret way to banding the Deltas and AKAs; talk about the off brand sororities. Oops…did I just hit Submit Comment?

13 06 2008

Yes hard! and maybe 1.5 vienna sausages. I declare foe gawd that I didn’t feel it the first time.

13 06 2008
shabooty

yea a pre-engagement is like the same as trying to bukkake a bitch with pre-cum… it just doesn’t work that way.

13 06 2008

dead @ knat!!!!!!!!!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

poor Ne hahah that sucks…I use to know this fine brotha..really really like dhim..nice size dick all that but he was min man..i was disappointed…

13 06 2008
Muse

I’m not sure how I would react if I was with a man with a baby dick. Studies do show that women only need 2 inches of penis to be satisfied but I have a hard time believing that lie.

I believe size and girth really do matter.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

smh@ Shabooty’s randomness..bukkake? confused.. ingles por favor..buttcake?

13 06 2008

I really get sad when I think about it. He was great on paper but I would never get an orgasm. He would be working so hard, sweating and all (holding laughter) smh.

13 06 2008
shabooty

go look it up on urbandictionary my friend

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

I am Lame… I be the first to admit it… but i am not Lame because of Sigma… I am just Lame because I am just me, my self and I.

never wanted to be the cool kid – to fake always have to please people
never wanted to be the incrowd — because well they do stupid things…
and as quick as you are the in crowd you are the out crowd…

just wanted to always be me… LAME…

13 06 2008

I agree muse. TWO MEASLY INCHES? I dont think so.

13 06 2008
Knatural

NOOOOO Bukkake, Mrs.Epps you don’t wanna know!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

2 inches my ass…i need at the least 7 1/2 -8 thanks.. my cooter denies anyone under and only allows head..lol jokes..i never had the problem with a dude w/ a small dick prob cuz i never been with one ahha woohoo go me!!

13 06 2008
shabooty

there is no me in lame… nevermind =)

13 06 2008
Omar

speaking of weaves remember the good old days when women used to actually make the weave LOOK real, now that shit obviously looks fake and sometimes the track be showing, WTF…!!!

Just one of the reasons I like natural hair…

…and why isn’t there any actual black women’s hair in “Black Hair” magazine.

13 06 2008
Dustin

Go to the gym and the barbershop over lunch and miss out on the best convo ever!

Ewww! The image of cornrolled p*ssy hair made me throw up in my mouth.

Speaking of keeping it trimmed for the oral activities, does anyone wax/nair or bleach the assh*le? Just curious.

13 06 2008
Landon

Ne:

sexual satisfaction is a must…

just like there are some girls so loose it feels like throwing a baseball bat down a hallway…. so we understand…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

dammit wish i read that before i looked it up Knat..eww

13 06 2008

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

13 06 2008
Landon

Dustin:

GETS THE WTF AWARD of the day!

13 06 2008
Deesigner

“Studies do show that women only need 2 inches of penis to be satisfied”……………….Thats a Got’ damn, baldfaced, cracker assed lie told by a tiny toter.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Landon, I think the question was about the extent of your grooming down there…since you require so much about your women?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon-just like there are some girls so loose it feels like throwing a baseball bat down a hallway…. so we understand…

i gotta write that one down..good one!

13 06 2008
Muse

Look at poor Landon explaining himself LOL.

Who admits that they are lame…Geez. That took the fun out of everything. You really are lame so sad…

Now I have to put a face to the fuck-tardness

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

bleach the asshole? scratches head… wow

13 06 2008

loosey goosey’s and little dick vicks should all live on one island.

I have an island for all kinds of people. Especially whites.

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Dustin!!!!!!!!!

13 06 2008
Landon

well i am a nappy negro so i think it maintains it self…

13 06 2008
zoso

Thats a Got’ damn, baldfaced, cracker assed lie told by a tiny toter

ahahaha.

@ landon: Oh, the question was:

Hows your grooming?

13 06 2008
shabooty

no… women in fact DO need just 2 inches (x 3in) to get off… the dimensions of a credit card.

friggin wh0rez

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esquire thats some kinda double speak “Asking for money (ew)”

bet you want have a problem asking your dad to help pay for the budget overages or asking you man or his dad to pay for the extra flowers?

…but its ok to ask for you to spend said money on neiman items huh?
who’s fooling who? self limiting belief. fuck tradition, fuck etiquette. write some new rules and keep the shit real.

register at Citibank, tellem you don’t have enough 50’s and hundreds.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

ok Landon meaning you dont do shit down there!!

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Esquire,
Jumping the broom is tacky? I’m a southern gal and I love it when people include this in the wedding. But maybe I’m a different kind of girl/person. I take a great deal of pride in knowing that I am a descendant of African slaves (let me know if I should elaborate on what that is) and I think this is a very meaningful way to acknowledge our history on such an important occasion.

13 06 2008

NO NO LANDON YOU ARE WRONG MY FRIEND!

trimm that nappiness those nappy hairs are the worst to cough up. You could really kill someone. God forbid they swallow 2 hairs.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

LMAO @ shabooty!

And Dustin, how random!! (whispering…most salons also do the back when you get a Brazilian/Japanese wax)

13 06 2008
Knatural

Dustin, what you smoke at the barber shop and/or gym. Bleach the rosebud? How? Why?

13 06 2008
shabooty

the better analogy is…she’s so loose it’s like throwin a hot dog down on a hallway

=)

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

shabooty are you mad you didnt make the cut for the 2 inches boo haha

13 06 2008
Landon

Some one admits to being LAME because they dont care what people think…

I go by the beat of my own DRUM.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Is anyone else afraid of the Japanese now? Bukkake, Japanese wax, Godzilla, seriously. I’m a little afraid.

13 06 2008
Landon

i just dont grow a lot of hair i guess… you talked about the underarms…

i mean…. i guess i just dont have hairy genes…. what do you want me to say…

the most i have is a goatee… and that took like 25 years, lol

13 06 2008
Lia

Lindsay-when I got my tattoos, the fully tatted guy there also told me his most painful ones were the ones on his wrist. Mine did not hurt at all and I’ve got 4 with several more on the way. And many people aren’t even aware that I have any because I don’t run around flashing my wrists, and I have a cluster of stars on my back(I’ve had them 2 yrs, so rih rih was not my inspiration). When I run out of places to cover, and meaningful tats, I’ll stop. I’m getting a guardian angel on my other shoulder for my uncle who just died, and even then, I’m refusing to put his name in it. I will never get anyones name tatted on me. Children included

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@Landon – U gon’ take that from Ne?? She went low with that one (pun intended)

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

…and why isn’t there any actual black women’s hair in “Black Hair” magazine.

Omar, why the fuck are you worried about it. please tell me you are in the hair bizness but if you were then you’d be plotting to do something about instead of asking why? go for it. make something happen.

13 06 2008

Ok this is personal…

Are your balls nappy headed hoes? Or do you not grow hair down there?

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

I’m back and oh my goodness. First, I’m glad I made people laugh with the pussy comment, I never say that word but it seemed right after “bald-ass”.

Second, bleaching one’s anus is for white people. If I bleached mine, it’d look very strange indeed.

And last, two inches is not enough. Sorry, boys.

13 06 2008
shabooty

mrs epps@

lol no…i am in the omar epps club, thank you – no homo.

13 06 2008

LMAO @ PMC

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol aight Shababy…just checkin… 😉

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

And Esquire, I lubs you for putting me on your most hated list. For saying pussy like Charlotte. 🙂

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Damn Ne, i bet his balls are nappy headed hos.

13 06 2008
Chris Waa Doqon

Having kids out of wedlock and the resulting FREAKIN HUGE number of bastard little punks in the black community is their demise. There is nothing more stronger than a two parent, wedded, household.

13 06 2008

lol no…i am in the omar epps club, thank you – no homo.

Straight up now tell me you heard about his member through the grapevine.

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon probably has mini balls and a high pitch voice.

13 06 2008
Esquire

you know,
I catch a lot of heat for hating the jumping the broom. But I do. I just do. The way I see it is, it is not a TRUE african tradition. It is a slave tradition. It something they did cause Massa wouldnt allow them to get married in the church. I get it, but why do we keep doing it now that we have our own churches. I knooooow its just a tradition. But I hate it. Not more than a little psycho boy running down the aisle screaming the bride is coming the bride is coming. I wanna knock his ass out.

Prime: I dont have to ask daddy OR my husband for moolah shortages, I make my own bread, and significantly more than my husband. (This may change after I am dismissed today) And more than my father did at my age. However, it wasnt me who demanded the flowers at the wedding….it was my mom. My husbands parents didnt pay for a damn thing but the rehearsal dinner.

I WILL agree with you though, it is kinda double talk to register for gifts and not wanna ask for the money. I dont know…(sigh) Im so confused.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Wait, wait…there are weddings where little kids go screaming down the aisle “The bride is coming”? Is this some kind of Southern thing?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol still dont know who landon is on facebook…i guess im slow..i wanna see a face with the writing…so i can understand lol

13 06 2008
Landon

muse:

if that is true MUSE (mini balls and high voice)
you must be able to fit a grapefruit up your love canal…

13 06 2008
Esquire

Muse: dang you really DONT like Landon. This is amusing to me…going to get a soda and act like Im picking up a file.

13 06 2008
Landon

i joined the group on facebook not sure why it is so tough..

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Landon frontin!!

13 06 2008

THIS IS ENTERTAINMENT!

13 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

I’ve created a monster…

No hair on vaginas, or anything else that I eat.

That is all I have to say.

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon also sits down when he takes a piss.

13 06 2008
Esquire

No one else has heard of the Bell Ringer? IS that a Southern thing?? I HATE it.

http://www.weddinghelpers.com/weddingcustomsbells.html
THIS dummy had one
http://jennifermike.com/wedding_party.html

Its so stupid and annoying. Equally as annoying…the MINIATURE BRIDE/MINIATURE GROOMS…what the FUCK are we teaching our children?? What is THIS shit?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

muse and Landon act like a married couple.. maybe they secretly are…

13 06 2008
Landon

Yes MUSe but that means i am taking a shit after i piss — you dont know this?

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon, my vaginas muscles are in great shape and oh so tight. Don’t hate because your momma didn’t have to push for your ass to fall out of her cunt.

BTW you look old as fucking Moses in your picture.

13 06 2008
Muse

Erm I meant vaginal. Damn damn damn.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esquire keep getting that cheese. not mad at ya. i hope you’re not running around the house when you get mad, making it painfully clear what your (our, when you’re not mad) money paid for.

and who paid for the broadway production that was probably your wedding. i say yours because you probably paid for it like everything elses huh?

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I take a great deal of pride in knowing that I am a descendant of African slaves (let me know if I should elaborate on what that is)

I meant to say, “…on why that is.” No its not an African tradition. It’s an African SLAVE tradition. The tradition of our ancestors (mine at least….I don’t that you came from slaves). And we should honor them. They survived the middle passage, generations of abuse, being treated like cattle, to be freed and start with nothing, fought for the most basic of human rights, built something from nothing, so that you could one day go to a big fancy law school and get married lawfully in a pretty white dress. I just think that deserves some recognition. I’m not trying to change your mind. Hell, you’re already married. I was just taken aback by the statement.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

wow@ Muse..that was harsh about his mama’s wide cunt..damn

13 06 2008
Dustin

It’s not tough. I’ve stared at Landon’s pic at least three times since this morning.

Yes, NB, bleaching the assh*le is mainly for majorities. And porn stars. But, really, it depends on your shading in that area. People wax it too. It’s all very gross.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

landon looks like question mark to me hahah

13 06 2008
Dustin

Not really. I’m too busy. It was only once.

13 06 2008
benjie

FUCK R. KELLY AND HIS PISSING ASS!!!

i’m soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo pissed right now.
so pissed.

13 06 2008
Landon

um 10 hours of labor have you seen the size of my head?

i only grew into when i turned 18..

and i do look lil old now… fucking too many AkAs will drain your life force….

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Anyone else want some popcorn? The shit is going down between Landon and Muse.

Chris, do you eat kiwis?

I don’t see why every African American should do the jumping the broom thing. I have no ties to any slaves that I know of-i can’t trace my history very far back. I got into a majorly heated argument with a girl in my Afro class about this subject. She said all african americans have slave ancestors and should therefore recognize them by jumping the broom. I looked at her like she was nuts and said that I had a friend named queenie from Nigeria who was born here, therefore she was African American and has no American slave ancestors.

Beside that, my mom is totally against it for me and my sisters because we have no idea who her parents were (she was adopted at birth) and my dad’s mom was a Cherokee and his father was from Britain.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Im too old for Facebook.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Landon’s on Fbook? No one’s introducing themselves. You bastards. It’s cool, privacy is respectable (kinda).
How do people deal with weaves/wigs in the summer. And on my way to get Bertha a snack, I saw a woman with full bushage under her arms. Eww.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Yeah Muse, I think you crossed the line. Joking about mass famine – acceptable. Talking about somebody’s mama – ground for getting your a$$ whooped.

majorities Dustin?

Yeah Esquire – you do bring up the money thing a lot on this blog. I hope its just with us cuz we don’t know you or your husband. Not at Thanksgiving dinner though…”I make 3 times as much as my husband and…” Not a good look.

13 06 2008
Muse

You were probably screwing some garbage looking bitches which is why you look as fuck.

13 06 2008
Landon

Ummm MUSE… look at my pics on Facebook and look at the girls in my pics then get back to me…

YOu couldnt even make my summer league Squad!!!

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Yonnie, majorities are hetero white people

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Which one is Landon in the facebook group?

13 06 2008
Muse

I’ll talk about someone’s retarded ass kid too. Fuck everyone. Folks are fair game.

13 06 2008
Esquire

NotBlonde:
It aint even that deep with me. I just hate it. I always envision people screaming

“I’s Married Now”

Prime: I dont fight dirty with my husband. We dont fight abuot money or who is spending what or how much we contribute. He met me before I went to law school and knew what the deal would be. He is a teacher. I also allow my husband to think he is running the house, but that would have happened if he made a gazillion more than me.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Oh, the guy named Landon….

13 06 2008
Knatural

NotBlonde – Austrailian girls or the fruit? He’ll probably say yes to the Aussie girl. Freak.

13 06 2008
Muse

Nigga you don’t know what I look like and I don’t want to be on the retard squad.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse saying her SNatch is TIGHT

R Kelly Found Innocent

a black man is about to become president…

the end of the world must be near!

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

LOL. Hairy fruit….hairy Aussie…

13 06 2008

There will be not jumping over the broom in my wedding either.

I feel like it’s mockery (IMO). I feel like being able to get married where we want to and when we want to is honor enough. What jumping over the broom symbolizes is not what we are today.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Muse is heated as shit…Landon why are you hiding you idenity…no one will steal your credit i swear! a question mark aint helping us figure out where these crazy comments come from dammit!…lol..

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon did you guys a favor by hiding his face. This fool is going bald on the top. So sad.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Not Blonde, your friend is a Nigerian-American. She knows where her ancestry came from. Her parents or grandparents are from Nigeria. African-Americans are descendants of slaves who don’t know where in Africa they come from…hence the name. Have you ever heard an Italian person say they were European-American. No! They know where they’re from. They’re Italian-American. Irregardless (ha ha) of whether you can trace your roots to a specific slave – Sacrifices Were Made. Pain was endured. You are the beneficiary. You don’t have to like jumping the broom, but show some respect. Do better.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

R. KELLY ACQUITTED

13 06 2008
Dustin

NB, I just use “majorities” for white people, but I like the “hetero” aspect too. Then ass bleaching is definitely not limited to majorities, rather white people in general.

I didn’t know Brazilians/Japanese “hit up” the back too.

13 06 2008

::passes the goobers and licorice::

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon take your own advice and save your head. Premature balding is tragic but I think you will be alright with a bad head. Your mom’s snatch was so wide that you probably have a perfectly shaped head.

13 06 2008
Knatural

The Pied Piper is innocent? NOOOOO. I saw tha tape…

13 06 2008
13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

wow…this is too funny…i have totally stopped working..and keep my mouse on the refresh hahah

13 06 2008
Muse

Whoa I just missed something…

Chris you eat vag?

Why am I shocked? You seem too angry to eat puss. I’m afraid you might bite the girl’s stuff off in a fit of rage.

13 06 2008
Esquire

Ohh ohh. let me defend myself.
I only bring it up on here to prove that all women arent gold diggers, that I love my husband despite the salary difference, that marriage isnt about the money.

I would NEVER fight with him bringing that ish up. Its something that he and I actually joke about. It’s not a good look AT ALL. That being said, it shall not be brought up again. I ve never (and wouldnt) post a number for salaries on here. Plus, as Ive stated before, I am soon to be a solo practitioner because I spent two billable hours on here instead of billing today. Salary soon to be $10K for unemployment.

Have I been forgiven?

13 06 2008

Once I read Chris was a cancer. I knew he was a freak… an angry freak, but a freak.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

I think Muse knows Landon personally…**gobbles down popcorn**

13 06 2008
Muse

Ne I added you as my e-friend on facebook. Oh BTW yall look at what Somali Queen wrote on the wall…

“Jameelah Rose wrote
at 12:30pm
Chris probably related to Muse and Landon — I have never used the language they have or lowered myself to that nasty level of mudslinging and he bans me? FUCK YOU BLOG NIGAA, FUCK YO BLOG!”

I died laughing. I need to work. I hate you mofos. Then again my boss is gone today. I’ve been in the office since 6am.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Somali Queen is back AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA on Fb. I actually don’t mind her.

13 06 2008

somali queen says:

Chris probably related to Muse and Landon — I have never used the language they have or lowered myself to that nasty level of mudslinging and he bans me? FUCK YOU BLOG NIGAA, FUCK YO BLOG!

BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HE BRINGS OUT THE BEAST IN PEOPLE.

13 06 2008
B4Prez

– Muse has a lil sumthin for Landon…I’ve decided

– I don’t care if it’s a weave, perm, fro, stray hairs from a 100% German Shephard wig…keep that shit ouf of my sink…and my brush!

– lol@ bukkake

– Just becus we as ‘colored folk’ have made some ‘upgrades’, we don’t have to start looking down on the broom jump

– Any little kid RUNNING through my wedding saying ANYTHING is gettin tripped, and then he’s gettin’ beat with the broom while he’s on the floor. If I don’t draw blood, then we can get back to the jumpin’!

13 06 2008
Esquire

MUSE you are soooo mean. (secretly loving it)

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Forgiven

13 06 2008
Esquire

Has anyone seen the blinged out brooms?? Come on people. If you are truly doing it to “honor” your ancestors, leave the bling, bows, and ribbons off.

13 06 2008
B4Prez

Somali Queen swallows!!!

13 06 2008
Muse

I cussed out a handicapped person other the other day for rolling over my foot. Mother fucker needed to watch were he was wheeling himself.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Ne hell yea cancers are some freakkkkkkkkssss i live with one now!..hhahaha Chirs a angry freak lmao..hmm a girl could use that to her advantage…

13 06 2008
Knatural

“Somali Queen swallows” Is this an insult???

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

*passes Mrs. Epps some Raisinettes* You like these, Mrs. Epps?

Yonnie, I don’t think jumping over a broom at a wedding is necessary to remind about 3/4 of the people in the room that it was likely their ancestors were slaves in this country. I certainly have pity for slaves and their lot in life sucked, but you don’t see Jewish people having their grandparents show their concentration camp tattoos at their weddings to remind them that there was a Holocaust.

We all know that most African Americans have slave ancestors. It’s a cute little thing to do but I’m not a slave, and that ritual does not reflect who my ancestors could have been.

13 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:
Just because you need Rogaine to fill in those balding spots on your head dont get mad at me… looking like pookie’s down syndrome lil sister
Going bald hardly -its called a ceasar cut…

I guess you had your mouth open when you were born… because the stench from your mama’s pussy got your breath smelling like sun dried TUNA.

13 06 2008
Esquire
13 06 2008
Monie

If RKelly is innocent we need to find that old guy from New Jack City and get Rkelly like he got Nino Brown at the end of the film.

RKelly your soul is required in HELL!!!!

13 06 2008
Muse

See Landon speaks from ignorance. Can someone please tell this waste of sperm how much hair I have. He obviously hasn’t seen me at all.

Dumb ass Sigmer.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Chris probably related to Muse and Landon — I have never used the language they have or lowered myself to that nasty level of mudslinging and he bans me? FUCK YOU BLOG NIGAA, FUCK YO BLOG!

omg i have a headache laughing so hard….gotta give it to her she fucking hilarious!

13 06 2008
Landon

I mean i could buy that much hair from teh koreans also…

what is that SILKY #9?

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Oh no R. Kelly is not innocent. I can’t believe this shit. As Monie says, R. Kelly, your soul will report to hell when your filthy ass kicks the bucket.

13 06 2008
ATL Shawty

Ha SILKY #9….

13 06 2008
Knatural

NotBlonde – your inner fat girl shares food???
Cancers and Pisces and Virgo, the only signs I have no relationship experience with. They don’t find my sarcasm and non-chalantness attractive, I guess.

13 06 2008
Muse

I smell hate. Go talk to those garbage AKAs you were braggingi about earlier Land-tard.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I’m running to the concession stand. Anyone want something?

13 06 2008
Esquire

Muse. When I was in school, my professor STAYED picking at these two handicapped people in our class. One day he was fussing at us about coming to class late. He says “Some of you mothafuckas walk in here late ALL the time, and some of you ROLL in here late as hell on the regular.”

I thought that was wrong. I still laughed. Im going to Hell…with Bob Johnson

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Knat, Bethany never shares food…did I say she did?

Bethany is trying to make herself look good…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

NotBlonde yum raisinettes i love them actually hahha how’d you know

omg @ Landon is STOOOPPIIIIIIIDDDD!!!!!

i foreal got a headache now laughin i need a break…

13 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:

i know you got a lot of hair, we alrady establised you got BUCKWHEAT grwoing between yoru legs.. we know you a hairy realitve of the BIGFOOT.

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@Knatural…it is when used on a prude

But in the words of Whitty Hutton, HELL 2 THA NAW! Your value as a human has just gon up in my book!

*I got $4.97 for whoever know’s where “Whitty Hutton” is from.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Yonnie, could you hook me up with some Gummi Bears and Sour Patch kids? Here’s $15.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

you talking about your line sisters? Why you talking about your line sisters like that?

13 06 2008
Muse

Esquire I’m an equal opportunity hater LOL. People with disabilities are not excluded from my wrath.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

Your line sister licked my brand and scalp… she said she always wanted to do that since see saw School Daze.

13 06 2008
Deesigner

They fucking cleared that pedophile bastard!!!!!
So it is basically open season on young black girls. If that girl had been white his ass would be under the damn jail.

13 06 2008
Esquire

snorting.

13 06 2008
Dustin

I agree. It’s clear that there’s something b/w Landon and Muse.

I’m sad now. I guess I’ll go do some work or some shit.

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon I’m going to need you to try harder. I know becoming a Sigma is a sign of your poor judgment but there is always time to redeem yourself. Please try harder. For the sake of Black baby Jesus, please say something funny.

Being referred to as Big foot or any animal isn’t insulting to me. I’m sure that cave bitch you call a momma has a lot of hair too.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

Bleaches her asshole hairs so she can see her shit BBs easier…

(thank you Dustin)…

13 06 2008

SUN DRIED TUNA…………………………….I CAN’T

13 06 2008
ATL Shawty

Muse:

Umm he’s been pretty hillarious… you keep harping on his Mama and he’s just talking about your ass…

Step your game up..

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

personally i cant stand handicap ppl and i know i will go to hell for it.. but dammit foreal.. liek they get parking space in front of stores…whena nigga can roll his ass to the door!!..or on the bus when they have handicap part..the whole 3-4 seats go up when a dude in a wheelchair comes on..the mothafucka already sitting!!! c’mon now!!! and i hav emet asshole handicap ppl so i treat them liek everyone else.. mean i know but o the fuck well they wanna be “normal” so be it!

Maria will cut a nigga if they take her food…she’s actually bitten my man before..she’s LOCA!!

13 06 2008
Muse

This isn’t even a fair e-fight.

My period clots have more personality. Jesus Christ someone help Landon out.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k
13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Landon I told you he would be aquitted. in chicago he is da man. mammas be sending they babies at that man and babies be sending there mommas. this is a letigious nation. just like oj i think R did it, but they couldn’t prove it. it’s gonna be some kinda music coming out of his camp now. believe that.

Esquire: goood girrrl. you just keep letting him think that. (wink) …and you still didn’t say who payed for the blocbuster production that was your wedding. do fess?

13 06 2008
Muse

Yah I wish I agreed ATL aka Landon LOL.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Whitty Hutton from Martin right?

13 06 2008
zoso

“I think Muse knows Landon personally…**gobbles down popcorn**”

Mrs. Epps fueling the fire.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

B4Prez…that’s from Martin! Just take the $4.97 and buy a nice petunia for my funeral arrangement because Landon and Muse have kilt (yes KILT) me.

13 06 2008
The Doc Is In

Ah dayum, Mrs. Epps beat me to it. I’m too old and slow to keep up with y’all, LOL.

13 06 2008
Omar

This R. Kelly shit is starting to remind me of the Rodney King video…R. Kelly needs to be shot right in the cornrows.

13 06 2008
Muse

R Kelly is disgusting and one day he will mess with the wrong child. I’m not surprised that the jury found him not guilty. The case against him was weak like Landon’s ability to maintain an erection.

13 06 2008
Landon

Muse:

Its ok… your losing it happens to people like you…. but look a here i gots to bounce…

So dont keep your legs open to long because your snatch causes Global Warming…
I am going to play golf…. BUT SOMEWHERE DEEP IN HEART i got love for you like JEWS do for Hitler 🙂

Peace luv and Nappiness…

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

zoso no im not :-D…ok maybe i am but i have always been an instagator..cant help ma self…

13 06 2008
Landon

MUSE:

well i wasnt having any trouble with erections untill i saw your picture…

shit been limp every since

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

OMG! Tim Russert died! R.I.P.

13 06 2008
klysha

The only thing that truly bothers me about engagements are engagement parties, bridal showers and every other way I get raped for presents by people I barely care about and who are too broke and/or lack the home training to reciprocate properly…..

This is what I would have posted on had I written a post on why I hate
engagements because I have funded the futures of countless people in the past couple of years…and I won’t get started on the baby showers…I want to see how many of these folks will be at my engagement/wedding/baby shower

And yes there really are weddings with little boys ringing bells saying the bride is coming….I thought it was hilarious when I saw it at a wedding last year

13 06 2008
ATL Shawty

Wait was R kelly fully acquitted?
hung jury? how in the hell? Mistrial?

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

“So dont keep your legs open to long because your snatch causes Global Warming”

Im sorry Muse.. but that had me rollin..still love girl

13 06 2008
Muse

Landon since you like the taste of penis and scrodom, I wouldn’t expect you to find me attractive.

13 06 2008
ATL Shawty

wow… he was young wasnt he

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Knat: Bethany does not get Raisinettes. When Bethany goes to the movies she gets two hot dogs, nachos, gummi bears and a large coke.

13 06 2008
klysha

in re to R Kelly… if anyone cares…..not guilty…..

http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/13/rkelly.closings.ap/index.html

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Whitney Houston is from Newark.

13 06 2008

I am going to have a “not married” reception and shower, you all are invited.

13 06 2008
ATL Shawty

So dont keep your legs open to long because your snatch causes Global Warming”

ROFLMAO

Sun Dried Tuna

LMAO

yall just need to get married and get it over with…. have you own reality tv show..
MUSE & LANDON

13 06 2008
Monie

Merri Lee,

I just saw that. Wow that was a surprise. Apparently he colapsed at NBC.

13 06 2008
NotBlonde

Congratulations Ne! 🙂 I am so coming and getting you various innappropriate single people” gifts.

13 06 2008
Muse

How about I have good taste in men?

13 06 2008
Omar

We need to get the little kid from the wire (the one that shot Omar) to get R. Kelly.

kid: Hey can I get your autograph?
R. Kelly: Get the fuck outta here k…
kid: BANG!

13 06 2008
Knatural

Merri Lee, Tim Russert, that’s shocking. Same age as my dad…
NotBlonde – I figured raisinettes was too ‘healthy’ for Bethany AHAHAHAHAHAH. Why do our inner fat-girls’ names begin with “B”. Is “B” in obese letter?

13 06 2008
Esquire

Prime:
my mother and father paid. But I didn’t say it was a blockbuster …just a good ol party. They merge thier money, so I cant honestly tell you who trulllly came out the pocket more, if thats what you want. If my husband and I had paid, we would have been married at the courthouse and had a bbq afterward. (ghetto style) I would have splurged on top shelf liquor. Total=$1000. lol

Muse: I am siding with you for now. It sounds to me like Landon is pulling these jokes off a website.

But I am enjoying…please carry on.

13 06 2008
Muse

Sigmers lack the ability to be original.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Né – I’ll bring you a “not gift”.

13 06 2008
Monie

Russert was 58

13 06 2008
Esquire

Betha, Bethany, Beyonce….she has an inner fat chick that is jsut fucking DYING to come out. Wit her creole ass…

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@NotBlonde – It’s not that serious. A slave tradition is a far cry away from a concentration camp. Jumping the broom may have been born out of not being allowed to marry in churches, but all of the things we call African American culture were born from the fact that we couldn’t do anything that YT’s could do. So we had to start our own. And with so many AFRICANS sharing the same elitist views toward Afr-Ams that the YT’s have, I couldn’t care less if a tradition is from Africa.

The bigger point isn’t specifically about the broom. EBP PSA: You don’t have to be ashamed of your slave history. There really wasn’t much you could do about it if ur ‘cruise ship’ docked in what we now call the USA. Believe it or not, just as today, we were outnumbered then also. Don’t worry, you won’t lose your Black Elite card for deciding not to ignore blacks’ slave history.

We spend so much time harping (for good reason), on the shortcomings of blacks. But don’t forget that we haven’t even celbrated 50 yrs of civil rights yet!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol Landon was probably on Jokes.com

13 06 2008
Knatural

Tim Russert always reminded me of the dad from Beetlejuice.

13 06 2008

My inner fat chick is named: Keylolo Tangeray Jenkins. She is from The mean streets odf oakland and will shoot a bitch if you touch any of her food. She also yells “WEEEST SIDE” randomly.

13 06 2008
Knatural

B4Prez…I kinda love you.

13 06 2008
Omar

I’m with B4Prez, we too often forget everything that we did on our own as soon as white people find us acceptable, that is why we hardly have black businesses anymore as soon as YT opened the door everybody jumped ship.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol@Ne..

My inner fat chick Maria..tried to eat while im sleeping..she is violent when it comes to funfetti cake and mac n cheese. Oh she also has tourettes

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

tries not tried

13 06 2008
Esquire

One last comment:

Me hating jumping the broom does not equate to me hating African-American traditions. I just hate THAT one. I think its stupid. I dont hate Black History Month or Martin Luther King…I just hate jumping over that broom. But do you, I wont pick at broom jumpers on thier wedding day. Just before and after.

Everyone have a good weekend. Happy Fathers Day to those fathers, step-fathers, and even you JaQuan who aint paying child support.

Muse and Landon. PLEASE keep this fight up. I have been thoroughly amused.

13 06 2008
Monie

Okay so the Russert thing will over-shadow the RKelly verdict in the White media. I don’t expect to see more than a blurb on any of the Network broadcasts about the travisty of RKelly getting off. But I’m sure they will be doing wall-to-wall Tim Russert retrospectives.

We need our own news really bad.

(also I don’t want to imply that I had anything against Russert, he was a decent jounalist)

13 06 2008
Deesigner

I totally missed the whitey hutton joke….I need to get my grown ass off here.
and Yonnie that clip was sooooo wrong.

Did anyone notice that Tim Russert was the ONLY news commentator that was genuinely happy when Hillary pretended to concede?

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

B4Prez – thank you for the PSA. That’s all I’m sayin’.

13 06 2008
Omar

@Knatural – It is because the letter B looks like someones titties just resting on top of their belly…that is no good.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Come back Jackie Reid, COME BACK!!!

13 06 2008
zoso

“Okay so the Russert thing will over-shadow the RKelly verdict in the White media.”

That’s a good thing. I don’t want to be constantly reminded that idiot’s goin’ scott free.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Deesigner – Dave speaks the truth! Man, I miss him…

13 06 2008
B4Prez

Sorry Doc, MrsEpps won…but Imma have to pay u next Friday! I gotta work some thangs out this week!

13 06 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Omar! Ass. I’m about to create a separate facebook page for Bertha featuring nothing but pictures of me feeding. And my last name begins with “B”, sooooo…

13 06 2008
Deesigner

@Muse, Do you honestly think that you have NO African ancestors that were enslaved in America just because you don’t know their names?

13 06 2008
Monie

Yonnie,

Jackie Reid made the biggest mistake of her career going to BET from Headline news. I bet she kicks herself everyday! Lol

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Not @ Muse, Notblonde!
I was trying to decide who won that cyber fight between Muse and Landon as I typed that last question.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

The B looks like a prezel that has been bitten at the bottom..

SHUT UP MARIA!!!

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Muse won because Landon left first. Thats kinda like submitting in wrestling.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

B4Prez..lol i only remembered it because we watched that episode lastnight on BET hahah

13 06 2008
Monie

And on top of that Jackie Reid got beat out for a spot on The View by the dumbest woman on earth, Sherri Shepard. Nope things have not been going well for Jackie since her CNN days. Lol

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

I didn’t realize she had been on Headline News. Her intentions were good, but yeah, she effed that one up. Oooopppssss.

13 06 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Esquire thanx for the sharage. imagine that money as adown payment on a house or in an investment today, thats why im registering at Citibank. your professor made a good jokey joke wit yalls late asses.

Muse: “I cussed out a handicapped person other the other day for rolling over my foot. Mother fucker needed to watch were he was wheeling himself.”

LOL! banannas!

Muse you and Landon need to grudge fuck.

everybody hwy do we hate somali girl soooo much and why did Chris ban her from the site? i missed that episode.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

KNat-AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Omar! Ass. I’m about to create a separate facebook page for Bertha featuring nothing but pictures of me feeding. And my last name begins with “B”, sooooo…

thats the funniest shit ever.. all the inner fat girls should start a club on facebook and share their feeding stories and pics!

13 06 2008
aceklub

I know that you are all gonna be mad at me…but we have to be careful of Aaron Macgruder…he is the next Niggadamus

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Optimus Prime… i mean Prime Minister…lol@Muse you and Landon need to grudge fuck.

13 06 2008
Muse

Do does that mean Chris, Salami, and Creole all need to grudge fuck too?

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

They don’t give those NAACP Image Awards to just anyone

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

dead@ Boondocks

13 06 2008
Omar

Aaron McGruder is a Genius.

13 06 2008
aceklub

Somali Queen’s comment sound straight from the Rick James episode of Chappelle’s Show..
“F@ck your Couch, N@gga”

Jay-Z ft. R. Kelly Guilty until Proven Innocent

Aside #1: Please trust that I am not supporting R. Kelly with this “victory” of his b/c he will meet his creator and that is where the final verdict will be given. Also, I don’t think we should be surprised. Money talks and Bullshit Walks

13 06 2008
Deesigner

Yonnie,
The guy in background said “I got one”.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

knatural i find your sarcasms amusing. You are one of my imaginary internet friends now.

Dang I go to get job and all sorts of shit breaks loose. I’m making some kettle corn for this.

Landon, that does not satisfy me, my family is from SC too. And you look geechie. Damn, are you short? if you are you probably are related to me. Actually theres tall people on one side too so that probably doesn’t prove anything. Also thanks for finally answering my question. I know shabootybaby aint. But damn man, you got nappydick and have the nerve to tell someone else to go all the way bald. Man you deserve no head, Them tight ass curls could choke a bitch. Put an scurl in there at least. And honestly, are the a pussy conniouseur? (sp?) only the appreciators get to to dictate baldness

13 06 2008
Muse

Fuck R Kelly has been fucking little girls for ages and he will probably never see justice. Yet a 17 year old Georgia went to jail for statutory rape of a 15 year old. WTF is wrong with our country?

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@Knatural: U wanna get pre-engaged?

@Esquire: Well yea…MLK and Black History month have the YT seal of approval. Of course the black elite love those 2 aspects of Black History. Since of course, there were only what 3, 4 things to be proud of, right? SMH

@MrsEpps: It’s curtains for your inner fat girl….Please keep her way back there!

@Omar: Ur right man. Black ppl all across blog land and the world are always talking about the lack of Black presence in ______(insert YT dominated, yet probably created by BP activity/industry here), but no one makes the connection that YT is not trying to endorse something black that BP dont even support. They dont care to see ur…we’re black! Let’s keep it real here ppl.

13 06 2008
Yonnie3k

Them tight ass curls could choke a bitch.

I’m done. I’m finished. As someone on here says, I can’t, I won’t. Goodbye. You guys have a nice weekend. I’ll be back next week with a renewed sense of hate. I wonder if Chris is gonna hate R-uh next week…

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@MrsEpps: U were watchin BET?????????????????????????? The EBP police are prob waitin outside of ur office to beat u with the broom they refused to jump over!

13 06 2008
Muse

I fucking quit Black people. I bet some of these coons are going to still support R.Kelly and his music.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

dang now i’m all late talking about shit from 3 hours ago. Man that Muse vs Landon was pretty good. I’m mad all the inner fat girls are getting together. Once I shove Debra all the way back inside I’ll join you. B4Prez are you on the FB? Did I friend you yet? I need you and Omar to be a part of my imaginary internet friends too. I miss Sista Toldja as well. But its prolly good she wasn’t here, b.c. that would be ganging up on Landon

PMC we dont like salami queef b.c. every time she commented on here she was sour, raining on our parade, insulting to everyone, bossy (esp. to chris) and in the end just boring with it. Although I voted she can come back if she keeps quoting Dave Chappelle like someone with sense of humor. If you have no sense of humor you get booted.

13 06 2008
B4Prez

No Im actually not on FB!! I know, all of the kool kids are doin it…rendering me lifeless scum…

No for real, for real, I’m signing up this weekend. I’ve been putting it off, but I’m finally ready to embrace my inner “kool kid/follower”, lol.

13 06 2008
Omar

We had to know R. Kelly was singing about little girls from the jump anyway…

half the shit sounds like nursery rhymes…

12 play = playing with 12 year olds…

… and he knew he was wrong “My mind’s telling me nooooo…”

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

B4Prez-@MrsEpps: U were watchin BET?????????????????????????? The EBP police are prob waitin outside of ur office to beat u with the broom they refused to jump over!

lol whhhatt it was like 2am nothing else was on and we didnt feel like sexin hahah so we watched Martin lol

13 06 2008
Knatural

Thanks Willnotbetelevised. We’re friends again. Until next time. DAMN, 600+ comments. We suck.
Mrs. Epps – you should rename your inner fatgirl Bonita!
B4Prez – no. I’m married, and if I were single I wouldn’t fall for that crap anyway.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Omar you are STOOOPPIDD HAHAHAHHahahahah…man i use to actually like R. Kelly but after all the madness im like eh i’ll listen to Jamie Foxx lol…R.Kelly old fucking Wack Arnold’s ass..rolls eyes..he lost my fanship when he came out with…..http://youtube.com/watch?v=XD4-ZAt8Nso

Stop it Kelles..foreal..thats enough..but then it was funny they kept playing the song on the radio so..now i know all the words to the song lol sad..

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

13 06 2008
Muse

Looks like my plantation is sending me to DC for next month for a damn meeting. Fuck DC is a grimey ass city during the summer. It’s all hot and humid. YUCK.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damn until next time. Whats all this until we meet again. Like I foiled your plot. Are you shaking a fist a me now… is it covered in a metal glove or petting a cat normally? 🙂

VIRGOS ARE THE BEST!

bonita droopybum?

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

But think about it Muse, you’ll be there in time for the SBPH family reunion on the fourth of july. Complete with drunk uncles and lecherous aunts. or drunk aunts(mrs. epps) and lecherous uncles (shababy?).

13 06 2008
Knatural

Oh crap! Muse is coming to town. Hide!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LMAOOO KNat…are you sure we dont know each other…i had an alter ego named Bonita Moreno foreallllzzz

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lmao@ being the drunk aunt.. i can dig it…

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Oh yea, at 3 pm like 6 people are going to be lined up to fight muse after school. Girl start working out.

hmmm maybe bonita chubbybum? bonita pearshapebum, bonita jellobum, bonita empirewaisttop you gotta put me on?

13 06 2008
Knatural

Bonita Itchy-bumm

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Damnit! why didn’t I think of that. sooo obvious and funny. I bow down to you knat (not very far though, i want to be able to get back up)

13 06 2008
B4Prez

@Knatural – Damn, u sure know how to turn a brotha down nicely…not really but, damn. I didn’t even get the “I see u as a friend” default dump.

@MrsEpps – I’m not mad at u. I secretly wish I could trade my family members for Martin’s characters, so I’ll watch a Martin rerun even if it’s on KKK-TV West Virginia on MLK day.

@Willnotbetelevised – Virgos ARE the BEST! I’ve decided.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

LOL..stop teasing my fat girl Bertha and Debra!!!!! Bonita bigbootybum gonna eat your cookies!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Girl Debra will bite you over some cookies. I can’t hate Debra too much, that heiffer can cook. Last christmas she made 9 pound cakes in 3 different flavors, 5 pies and a pumpkin roll. I wrapped up up and gave them as xmas gifts. Of course I had to fight Debra to do that but I bribed her with christmas dinner.

13 06 2008
Knatural

Willnotbetelevised – your inner fattie’s name is Debra???!!!?? Love it! She sounds REAL husky. Does she like chitterlings and neon green pant suits?
Muse acts like don’t have an inner fat-girl. I’ll dub thee…Ursula.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Saggitarius is tha shit!! WOoootW OOOOOOt

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

*wrapped them up*

13 06 2008
Sylph

You know y’all love the Geminis. Don’t lie.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahahahah chokes on @ Likes chitterlings and neon pant suits LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

dead..cremated and scattered in the ocean

Muse inner fat girl is Ursula omggg when i was litte that bitch scared me on Little Mermaid lol

13 06 2008
Muse

Wait you crazy negros are really planning on meeting? I thought yall were joking!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i wanna change my inner fat girl’s name to Zelda

13 06 2008
Knatural

Yeah, Sagittarians (moi) are kinda cool. Ursula stole Ariel’s voice! Bitch. I used to love that movie. Ariel could comb her hair with a fork, something I could never do. I can barely comb this mess with a comb!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

i combed my hair with a fork before when i was little..now i just scratch my head with one.. ghetto i know.. o well but it wells good…KNat your a Sag baby too cool!! we have quite a few Sag’s and Scorpio’s in my family

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

nope, bonita bubblebutt it is. Debra is not all the way inner. Which is why she is stronger and may kill bertha, bethany, bertha, bonita and ursula as long as ursula doesnt use magic. and I dont think ya’ll heard me, I like geminis and sagitarriian in fact those and scorpios are like second coolest next to VIRGOs WHO ARE THE BEST!!!!! for all and any reasons. in fact I’ll go so far as to say august virgos are the best. nyahnyahnyah.

Oh and debra is also who i call myself if my afro frizzes up from angela davis to florida evans in the humidity. Debra really likes neon but prefers spandex pants and those tops with the wide necks that fall of the shoulder so you see one bra strap. And open toe plastic shoes. Debra would like eating pants and acrylic nails colored in many wild colors, but I can wrestle her away from the strip malls with the chinese nail salons and kmart.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

damn non closing html!!!!!!!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

WillNotBEtEleViSeD-Oh and debra is also who i call myself if my afro frizzes up from angela davis to florida evans in the humidity. Debra really likes neon but prefers spandex pants and those tops with the wide necks that fall of the shoulder so you see one bra strap. And open toe plastic shoes. Debra would like eating pants and acrylic nails colored in many wild colors, but I can wrestle her away from the strip malls with the chinese nail salons and kmart.

thats some funny shit…

Well Bonita likes wearing cheetah print pants with indoor soccer shoes and bright yellow 1/2 shirts and gold bracelets, necklaces and hoop earings…she is fond of the taste of cotton balls and eats off her nail polish and always seems to wear her hair in two ponytails

13 06 2008
Knatural

Open-toe plastic shoes!? Jellies!!! Awwww, eating pants. Love those.
Off topic: how come in movies they make it look so easy to choke/knock out someone. Doesn’t it take ten minutes to choke a bitch unconscious? And how come in “period” pieces everyone has such nice teeth? I hate movies.

13 06 2008
Muse

I’m a Gemini. Nuff said.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Debra would feel most comfortable in a short jheri curl type hairstyle. I think thats what she attempts when they hair shrinks. I would have to shoot her for that so she knows not to try it. Debra is fond of large chunky jewlrey. Debra if fond of most things chunky. However Debra’s favorite jewlrey are promise rings and candy necklaces. Unfortunately Debra only fits candy bracelets. And those are nasty and sweaty if you actually wear them.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

And English flicks. everyone has nice teeth. But that always gets me about people in the hollywood world ‘ghetto’ they have nice teeth and no scars. But thats the hollywood magic. and it doesnt take too too long to choke someone out. depends on how much breath they have and how hard you’re holding them. Air is quite important.

AND WAIT was it you who first birthed eating pants knat???? if so we may have to go back to enemies. Do you know how long I had to figh debra after she heard about eating pants???

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

good question KNat…its like c’mon get some actors from london..we all know about their dental work…

wears candy bracelets not necklaces LMAOOOOOO

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Bonita still thinks she can fit the Pj’s with the feet and makes peanut butter and jelly sammiches with her hands not a knife and then puts chocolate syrup and marshmellows ans sprinkles on them

13 06 2008

virgos are aiiight…Pisces are the best btw!

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Debra makes presugared Kool-Aide with 1 cup of mix and 2 tablespoons of water. Then keeps the spoon handy.

Aside. Target has footy pajamas in grown woman sizes. My roomie has a pair. I keep meaning to go get some before they stop selling them. I missed out on sugar daddy jammie bottoms or boxers and i’m still sad. So is Debra but I think she was confused about the subject.

13 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

pisces are crazy ne. the only people i donts fux wits. Everyone of those watersprites was weird weird i always understand everything erykah badu says weird. Ne, tell me you’re on a cusp somewhere. I’m going to assume you’re not really a pisces.

13 06 2008

oh my…bonita is crazy!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

lol Debra wanted to eat the sugar daddy’s..i had some of those pj pants 😛 and i also had these bugs bunny ones that said “who’s your bunny”..

yea Ne bonita got issues foreallzzz
yea pisces are a little cooky..

13 06 2008

I am honey no cusp. Erykah badu is prob a cusp pisces.
Real pisces aren’t crazy girl. Albert einstein and I share the same b-day.

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

@ Mrs. Epps – not just bad dental work, bad weaves

13 06 2008

Lots of beautiful people are pisces. Look at their eyes, all pisces have gorgeous eyes.

I can’t believe you guys. Read about pisces women.

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Merri Lee!! ahha thats too funny!

wow looks like Beyonce creole ass got no hair…

13 06 2008
Merri Lee

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I love Toure in the background like, “Oh HECKS no.” Why didn’t she clip a ponytail to that? Ewww

13 06 2008

I think she has her hair in a bun layered hair looks like that in a “thrown bun”

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

He makes the picture sooooo much more funnier(?)

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

layered my ass dont give her any excuses!! she is BEYONCE and BEYONCE never rocks a pebble bun lol

13 06 2008
Me

I hate the idea of a promise ring. My then 16 year old neice spent the night and I noticed the ring on her left hand. I asked her what the hell? She said it was a promise ring. I then questioned promise to what? Promise not to beat you up?, Promise not to get you pregnant? LIke WTF?

13 06 2008
zoso

I just have one thing to sing before I hit the road (ultra-mini road trip!):

ahem “Aquariiuuuuuus, aquarius, aquariiuuus, aquaaaaaar-ee-us!”

See y’all next week.

p.s. we da best. AQUARIUS!

13 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Well I’m home peeps..and the hubby and babygirl about to walk in the door soon along with one of my dog sitting clients..dueces hommies..until monday!

Have a good weekend everyone!!

SHAG A SAG BABY AND YOU”LL NEVER SHAG ANOTHER AGAIN…

the end.

14 06 2008
Glennisha

Funny. I never heard of a pre-engagement until reading this blog. That’s the funniest shit I’ve ever heard of in my life. Wow.

14 06 2008
Angel30

Saying, “I’m mature for my age” is like saying, “I’m smart for my age.” Does that really mean you’re smart? Uh, no. People who really are mature don’t have to justify it. You’ll never hear anyone over 30 (28 maybe?) making that statement.
I love you Chris!!!

14 06 2008
Angel30

Ms. Epps,

I tried to be done with this yesterday, but I can’t help it. You talk about not having kids as soon as you get married, but you already have one – your stepdaughter.
Question: You said yesterday that you’ve been on your own since you were 17y.o., right? But you’re only 20 now & you’ve lived with 2 guys. When have you had time to breath? When have you REALLY been on your own? Or did I get that wrong?

14 06 2008
Angel30

@ Ms. Epps
“Omar-Food for thought the divorce rate has gone up about the same time that people started getting married at older ages. The advantage of getting married young is that you can grow together older people are often stuck in their ways and have a hard time adapting to the flaws of their mate or adjusting their own flaws.”
Your logic is flawed. Marrying at a later age isn’t correlated with an increased likelihood of divorcing. People started getting married later BECAUSE the divorce rate was going up – the folks who got married young finally had enough & split. People saw how miserable their parents were & decided they didn’t want that shit & waited.

14 06 2008
Angel30

You girls are crazy. Tattoos on necks, knuckles and wrists are hood/ghetto. And I’m not a prude – I have 4 tattoos & 3 piercings (not including my ears) & that stuff just looks ridiculous. Who wants to wear a collared shirt all the time? There are toooooo many other shirts you’ll want to wear to say that neck tattoos will be covered up by that. Don’t do it!

14 06 2008
Angel30

@ Ms. Epps
“it was too funny one night though..I was sleep and my man was still up and left his cell in the bedroom..its like 2 in the fucking morning and his shit goes off waking me up and i looked at the face and it said some chick’s name..so me being 1/2 sleep 1/2 pissed that it woke me up…i let voicemail pick it up.. 5 mins later bitch calls again!!!! im like fuck naw.. so i take his phoen to him and said somehting like “Get you hoes in check and stop calling late” he gave me the WTF face and i walked away…
soim back sleep again and wake up again to this nigga in the livingroom loud ass hell on the phone..i go out in the living room and was like “BOBBY AND WHITENY SHUT THE FUCK UP IM TRYNA SLEEP” he starts laughing and put the phone on speaker and said ” A yo my girl just called you whitney” tell me why his boy was on the other line cracking up and started talkin in a girl voice..lol..i felt dumb for the rest of the night”

Girl please, that was GAME. Some bitch kept blowing up his phone, he called her back 1st, then used his boy to get him out of trouble. He called his boy & started talking to him, got loud so it wouldn’t be as obvious as “hey, that was really Mike calling,” & when you came to dig in his ass he put dude on speaker phone so you’d think it was him the whole time. You should’ve been like, “Call that name back that I saw & put THAT on speaker phone.”

14 06 2008
Mrs.Epps

Angel30-i didnt live with my ex that long it was for a few months towards the end of our relationship and let him move in-with me before all the bullshit really started and then kicked his ass out lol…17, i lived with my aunt for the few months til i turned 18. 18, i had two roomates(same time ex lived with us, then 19 i got my own apartment. so yea hope that explains stuff…

as for tattoos on the neck.. i dint mean like the side thats not cute i was talking more like this

as for the girl that called all late..shakes my head..he must think i was a damn fool..the next monring round 6am i woke his ass up and put him on blast!

hope all that helps im out..

14 06 2008
Angry IV

600+ comments. Holy shit.

Anyway, I think this one is a crapshoot, to be honest. You’re either ready or you aren’t, and I don’t agree with the notion that college is time to “experiment” or basically be a slut for sluts sake, be it a female slut or a manslut. “Experimentation” is never an excuse to do any of the following:

– practice sluttery
– use/abuse illegal substances
– commit petty theft
– commit grand larceny
– commit assault & battery
– commit rape
– commit child molestation
– commit lewd acts
– become/be arrested for public intoxication
– commit murder
– break any law in the book

Just because you were “young & free and just living without consequence in college” doesn’t give you a free fucking pass to act like a douche rocket. Have some common fucking sense, and follow the God damned law. It might guarantee that you’ll be living with a home and a nice lawn in 20 years and not renting an apartment in Capitol Heights trying to save up some more money for “new shoes for the whip.”

FUCK that shit pisses me off…blaming environmental factors for deliberate douchebaggery.

14 06 2008
Angry IV

And I don’t believe in tats, myself. My fiancee has a couple and that’s her thing. She wants to get two of them removed, and that’s fine with me and I’ll pay for it whenever she’s ready. I always believed that I didn’t need art to make my body beautiful, since God made me a work of art.

That’s just me though.

14 06 2008
Nice

I got engaged when I was 20. My ex fiancee was also 20. Needless to say, it didnt work out. We were engaged for 3 yrs and had a beautiful son. I think alot of it has to do with whether the man is ready or not. Women I think in general, are more sure of what we want at an earlier age than men. I know that I see life alot different than what I did at 20. I considered myself a very mature 20, but wow has my perspective on life changed since then. Thats a natural growth process. At the end of the day, it depends on the person and their experience. I do know a few people who got married young and it worked out for them, but whos to say whats right for what person.

But for the most part, I thing alot of people sayin they are engaged are just playing house. I dont want to live with another man until I am married. That shacking up stuff is for the birds and many times it ruins the relationship because people tend to get comfortable with the situation because it is almost like being married anyways.

14 06 2008
Angry IV

I can agree with you somewhat, Nice. Women are probably more sure of what they want, but they expect it to go perfect. I think it takes a bit longer for men to mature, especially in today’s society.

Still, compare my longterm goals at age 18 with other guys…I wanted to graduate college, hold down a good job, and eventually own a home, hopefully by age 30. Other guys wanted to chase tail, get their dicks sucked and go to frat parties…it all depends on the person. Not that Goal #2 of theirs wasn’t one of my daily adventures (with repeated failure) but I actually HAD long term goals. Most of them would say “I don’t know I just wanna party!”

That being said, it all depends on the person or persons.

14 06 2008
Sister Toldja

I’m beyond late to the party. Sorry, I was mourining the miscarrige of justice in my hometown yesterday. Fucking bitch-ass R.Kelly. Ugh, I KNOW the clubs in Chicago were cracking last night playing his shitty ass music. Ladies free under 12 and such.

Pre-engagements are absurd, as are 5 year regular engagements. I have heard so many stories of women getting ‘the ring’ just to shut them up and being engaged for yeaaaars. What I don’t understand are 1)women who refuse to see that their man doesn’t want to marry them and 2) men who won’t come out and say “Look, I don’t want to get married ever/to you/anytime soon”. The years wasted with a ring that screams “OFF THE MARKET” with a February 31st wedding date could have been better spent finding a man who actually wants to marry ya. The amount of time in which I am walking around wearing a “LOOK, BUT DON’T TOUCH” sign on my left hand, as my fiancee wears no such thing should be about 18 months or so. If we aren’t planning a wedding or have no date set…..why are we engaged again?

14 06 2008
Sister Toldja

Also, for anyone who is getting married in the NY area, I am a wedding officiant. Holla at me for your special day!

14 06 2008
shabooty

sister toldja, you provide the brooms and the nike jumpmans?
🙂

14 06 2008
Michael

@Angry

Your list is a perfect example of retardation of society. Everyone wants to run around and be a ho for a day in college, why? Sex is much better with one person over a period of time.

@StuffBlackPeopleHate

Really? Shaved? Fuck outta here. I don’t like shaven vaginas just nicely trimmed ones. Nothing wrong with keeping a little park to play in.

15 06 2008
ph2072

Never heard the term “pre-engaged” before. How retarded.

“1/2 karat please-don’t-fuck-other-people ring” —> *COLLAPSE*

15 06 2008
Angry IV

Yo…my girl is watching “Something New” on TV right now, and it just pissed me off. The girl’s brother tries to introduce her to some dude, who happens to be grimey as fuck. Guess who the grimey mofo is? Blair motherfuckin Underwood, the grimiest of the grimey on the planet!! I hate that dude!!

15 06 2008
Sister Toldja

Shabooty, you are insane.

Angry, how is Blair the grimest dude ever? I love him, even though his love scenes with Miranda on SATC were more like interspecies than interracial and disgusting either way. Plus, he has a lovely family in real life and he’s a great actor! When my girls saw “Something New”, we rooted for him a little bit, lol.

15 06 2008
Angry IV

I suppose I hate his characters more than I hate him as a man – he does a great job portraying a grimey motherfucker on screen which makes me think that maybe he’s got some real life experience.

Either way, have you seen the movie “G”? The black version of the Great Gatsby…he’ll really piss you off in that one.

15 06 2008
Sister Toldja

“G”????? Oh hell no. They didn’t set it in modern-day Harlem or something, did they?

If I’m not mistaken, he was one of a group of brothers who went around the country apologizing to Black women a year or so ago on behalf of Black men. I refuse to let his image be tarnished!

15 06 2008
Angry IV

No, “G” is based in the Hamptons and surrounds a couple of characters – Summer G, a self-made hip-hop mogul, who tries to show the life he has created to the girl that used to date him when he was nothing. She happens to be married to Blair Underwood, who is actually cheating on her on the side with a brutal looking ghetto chick, and doesn’t treat her very well in the home also.

It’s a gripping movie. Won some independent awards.

15 06 2008
RiPPa

I’m thinking the 18-20yr old chicks are the same ones you see on Judge Joe Brown gettin sued for not wanting to give the ring back. But then again, there’re old ass desperate lonely chicks on MySpace who do the same thing.

15 06 2008
willnotbetelevised

Hmm just thinking about inner fat girls, I’m not the only chic on here that has a inner gay man am i? (I’m probably schizophrenic with all these inner personalities)

15 06 2008
Quirky Cutie

I once worked with a woman (late 20’s) who had three kids by a man, together 10+ years running around with a promise ring on her finger. Now that’s sad.

And to those people who think just cause you got married at 20 and haven’t yet managed to get divorced three years later, doesn’t mean you can whip out the champagne cause your marriage was a success and will last forever. People don’t stop developing mentally until their 30, shit together or not. Come calling when you hit 35. Also, the reason why marriages lasted years ago when people got married young was b/c society was different then and there also was a stigma to getting divorced. Not saying it won’t work when it’s done young, but odds are odds.

15 06 2008
t

“Also, psychologically people are definitely still undergoing significant developmental changes at 20. I know people flamed ILoveChris for saying it, but I have to agree, a 20 year old IS NOT mature even though some may deal with certain situations in a mature manner.”

I only think this is true because people don’t raise their kids to be mature in this day and age. During my grandmother’s generation, you were raised with the EXPECTATION that you could take care of a household, make wise decisions etc. by age 16. Guess what??? My grandparents did and most people throughout human history did! Today, people give their teenagers tons of freedom and ZERO responsibility and NO consequences – that’s why the average person can’t handle marriage, mortgage or anything else until they are at least 25 (if not 30). We have stretched childhood into the 20s and no one seems to be noticing. Our society is psychologically babying people.

I have a friend who purposefully raised his daughters to be wise. He told them as a stated goal that they should be able to run a household and their lives by age 14-16. Guess what? All of his kids are now over 14, have good heads on their shoulders, and never fell into the crap other girls their ages fell into. They also have either chosen decent boyfriends or said no to dating until someone decent came along. Kids rise to a challenge. THe problem is most parents think it’s a challenge to get their teenager to wash dishes, much less do anything else. Then again, my friend is a dad who is married to his children’s mother and actually interested and involved in his children’s lives…but don’t get me started.

Bottomline: Kids rise to a challenge. THe problem is most parents think it’s a challenge to get their teenager to wash dishes, much less do anything else. If you don’t put wisdom into your kids, then foolishness will come out by default.

15 06 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“We have stretched childhood into the 20s and no one seems to be noticing.”

I want to shake your fucking hand.

16 06 2008
Angry IV

My childhood ended somewhere around the 7th grade. After that I was ready to make my mark on the world…and it was the way I was raised.

Just like stated above, some parents just let their kids be kids until they’re in their 20’s…then all of a sudden try to flip the switch and turn on the “adult mode.” Doesn’t work that way.

16 06 2008
Sister Toldja

Willnotbetelevised- I DO!!!!! My inner gay man is a drag queen and she FIEEEEERCE!!!!! I have to check her sometimes when I am getting dressed, because at my height in some heels, too much makeup and the wrong clothes can make me look like an actual drag queen/TG. I snap for the kids all day, they give me so much fever. I swear, I’m gonna learn how to vogue.

AMEN to the childifying of Adults!!!!!! That’s part of the point John Singleton was trying to make with Baby Boy, but I think it was lost on a lot of people. Casting Snoop in a movie will do that. It’s weird though, because adults are getting more childlike and children are acting more like adults, with damning consequences. We have little girls wearing thongs and spending all day on cell phones and MySpace-ing with boys. And then we have adults who think having a baby is like having a new toy. 18 year old girls who think they should be married and 30 year old men who think they should be free to play the field forever, despite having 3 children and long-suffering (and often stupid) baby mommas. Boys need to have condoms attached to their penises until they are 25 and girls need fathers.

16 06 2008
The Doc Is In

T,…sure in your grand and great-grandmother’s generation girls were getting married at 16 and men were jumping into jobs to support their families at 18…cuz their asses were dying from TB and polio by 50.

Seriously though, in the first part of my statement you quoted I ALSO said “I agree that college has infantilized young adults to some extent…but it affords people the opportunity like never before to learn, travel, experience, and otherwise focus on developing themselves before becoming attached to another.” Extending the period of “youth” is a different topic than the problem of raising (or NOT raising) bad ass immature kids who can’t handle ANY level of responsibility even into their 20s and 30s. I’m someone who has worked since being in 8th grade, and have always held down my share of responsibilities. Shoot, at my school they had us balancing checkbooks, managing stocks and learning about insurance in middle school. That being said, at age 18 or 20 I’m sure I *could* manage a household completely on my own if I had to, but I’m not at all ashamed to say that I wasn’t *ready* to. At that age I was in college focusing on an extremely rigorous academic curriculum and taking advantage of opportunities to travel the world and all sorts of experiences I would’ve missed out on jumping into a 9-5 just to say I’m an “adult”. It’s a delicate balance and I’m all for instilling wisdom into your kids and raising them like you friend…just remember times ARE different and you also have issues when you force people to grow up too fast.

19 06 2008
Merri Lee

For teens to be pre-engaged is one thing, adults – that’s just stupid.

24 06 2008
That Saddity Chic

Awww screw that. My promise ring is from Cartier (we bought it in Paris) and my 4.5 carat engagement ring is Tacori. He purchased my promise ring while we looked around for the engagement ring I wanted (i hate surprises).

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