To My Readers: Sick as Hell

27 05 2008

All,

I feel like a bag of crap and am high on meds, so I won’t be writing today. Till tomorrow, please enjoy the following highlights from my weekend:

  • I pointed at two barely-dressed chicks outside 1223 nightclub and yell “LOOKA DEM HOOKERS!” They did not find this amusing
  • Chicken Jon spends the whole night referring to tech-savvy black people as ‘Niggabytes’
  • My buddy Mandrew, a freakishly strong but small individual (weighs 155, benches more than twice his body weight), picks up another friend of mine with one arm and body slams him on a bean bag chair for no particular fucking reason at all
  • I go out and down two carbombs, two white Russians, two B-52s, two black russians, a rum and gingerale, a shot of God knows what, and a long island. On an empty stomach.
  • As a result of my drunkenness, I give ‘the woman’ insanely bad directions back to my place. I am struggling the entire time not to vomit in her car
  • Back at my place, I vomit loudly and uncontrollably into my toilet
  • I wake up on the bathroom floor six hours later

Maybe this is why I don’t feel so good today…

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132 responses

27 05 2008
optimo peach

YESSSSSSS im the firsttttt. feel better foo’

27 05 2008
imaG
27 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHDBAIIAKADHAHAHAH NIGGABYTES!
Sick? Hungover and vomitting bile. Feel better, hydrate, and get some sympathy ____ from ‘the woman’.

27 05 2008
cmoore

i bet you swore to never drink alcohol again while in the back of your mind you were thinking where you were gonna go next weekend. get better……

27 05 2008
Yonnie3k

Mandrew? Is this a nickname or does it belong in the Unfathomably Ridiculous category of Stupid Names?

Feel better!

27 05 2008
Shine

Shit Mandrew is an awesome nickname for a midget muscleman. I should call my brother that. Feel better niggabyte. Get you some Emetrol, works wonders. Haha! …niggabytes…

27 05 2008
Lindsay

I also saw two barely-dressed chicks outside of 1223 on Sunday night.

Were they the “welcome committee,” dressed in all white, with angel wings?

27 05 2008
stuffgirlslike

Sir Chris

I am so very so sorry you are under the weather, what will happen to you readers? Might they discover new spaces and places?

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

27 05 2008
creativecat

Niggabytes is one of the funniest things I’ve heard in a long time!

27 05 2008
MissKella

Get well soon

27 05 2008
Ethel

Not sure you’ll even be online to read this but if you do, try to get down some Vit. B complex w/ a little dry toast. The vitamins will get rid of the nauseau/dry heaves. Gingerale [w/ real ginger – or crushed ginger in 7-up] also helps.

Feel bettah!

27 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

thats some funny shit because I am feeling the same way…these past three days has been nothing but drinking, eating BBQ/cookout food and lack of sleep. I took the day off because I feel like shit with my 1/2 hangover 1/2 bubble guts hahaha so today i will spend time writing my opinion on the past two blogs i missed on here, walking my dog, sweating this bug out, watching movies and checking my facebook and myspace..oh and sleeping…

btw Niggabytes made my day so much better…

27 05 2008
Cheekie

Aw, hope you feel better soon, Chris!

I have the Monday blues (on Tuesday because of the holiday), and “Niggabytes” just made me feel much better.

27 05 2008
shabooty

some1 got the osis…
negrosis, that is.

$

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Middle School/High School reunions are a bitch…

27 05 2008
Ljones

niggabytes is hysterical!! Sounds like you’re a great replacement for Amy Winehouse’s incarcerated betrothed!! If “the woman” didn’t stay while you slept in a pool of your own vomit- she isn’t a real ride or die chick, have her kick rox!! Just jokes, if that was the first encounter I’d start a blog about your ass!!

27 05 2008
HeadNutInCharge

the niggabytes had me rolling. thanks for making my day better even though yours is shitty.

another thing black people hate: GOING TO THE DOCTOR

http://www.platenuts.com

27 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

they have middle school reunions? hmmm…. i need to lay down and start drinking the pink stuff yummmmmo *gag*

27 05 2008
Sister Toldja

I mighta fought Chicken Jon over niggabytes.

I don’t understand this ‘middle school’ nonsense. In Chicago, we went to the same school from K or 1 to 8th grade. It was awesome. We had a reunion when we were high school seniors.

What the fuck is a Mandrew?

27 05 2008
waa

“niggabyte” is HILARIOUS! i saw the narinia movie this weekend (don’t ask)and one of the characters (an evil dwarf) is called “Nickabrick”, but ofcourse being who o am, i had to begin calling him “Niggabrick!” and if you say that enough times it just gets funnier and funnier….

@ LJones

so are you a “real ride or die chick”? : )

27 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH NIGGABRICK!!!!!!! stop. And he is a “Black Dwarf”!!! Narnia’s racist.

27 05 2008
Ljones

@ waa- you oughta know!!

27 05 2008
ishouldbeworking

Niggabytes and Mandrew?! LMAO at those two.

I hope you feel better soon Chris. Shine is right about the Emetrol. Drink Gatorade or Powerade for the dehydration and dry toast and/or saltines to help settle your stomach. My boyfriend says the carbs help “absorb” the liquor not sure if that’s true but it always seems to help me.

27 05 2008
waa

YES! narnia is on some racist shit! all the animals are black people or people of color… the centaurs (half man, half horse*) were definately black, one had cornrows and the main dude had a jerhi curl with frosted tips! hilarious!

(*i’ve been called this also… maybe its was a horse’s ass reference and not one about my endowments…)

@LJones – you are one of the most ridin’est, die’n-est chicks
ever!

27 05 2008
waa

oh yeah Chris –
i read this blog everyday, feel better…. try bananas (no monkey reference) for a hangover….

27 05 2008
Yonnie3k

Since we’re all clearly disappointed by the fact that this will be our fourth hate-free day in a row, may I offer up a topic that I’m sure everyone has a sacred hate for? Sorry for hijacking your blog Chris.

Memorial Weekend is always my Family Reunion. I love my family. All of them. No matter how crazy we may all be – myself included. But don’t you hate that one (in my case 2 or 3…per generation) family member that can never get it together? I’m talking about that 37 year old manchild that has not had a permanent address since he was 16. The one that doesn’t really have a job, but just makes money on an “as needed” basis. And his need is somehow much less than the average adult b/c despite having no job, no address, and frequenting the jails, he is never without some stupid, stupid, no self-esteem or ambition having woman willing to take care of him in exchange for what I can only imagine is the world’s greatest sex which she confuses for love and self worth. You have to have shifts to keep an eye on him in any situation in which an unsuspecting outsider (usually someone from the other family at a wedding or the neighboring pavillion at the family reunion cookout) may fall victim. But you can’t hate this cousin b/c he has such a great heart – especially when it comes to family. He epitomizes the saying that, “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” When he offers to “take care of” your newley divorced cousin’s ex, everyone fast forwards to a situation in which you are trying to explain to The Authorities that you never intended for it to go this far – you only wanted to scare him. And don’t get me started on the mothers of these menchildren – my own mother included b/c my younger brother is well on his way to carrying the torch for the next generation in my family Oh well. Another family reunion has passed. More memories were made. All we can do is love them and pray. Thanks for letting me rant. I feel better now.

27 05 2008
Cola

Ginger root will work wonders. If you can’t get that then grab a Schweps Ginger Ale. Works for me everytime! Feel better! 🙂

27 05 2008
vitazza

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!!! Feel Better!!! Chris…

27 05 2008
Say it isn't so

@Yonnie3K…You are so right. I don’t think we’ve had a decent man in my family in years… DAAMMMNNN

27 05 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

cracker ass carackerbytes. anyways you need hydration because alcohol dehydrates. try powerade or gatorade for to replace your electrolytes. cola has the right idea too. ginger root. try this in the strongest for of gingerale you have available in your area. the best i’ve found though rare is Buffalo Rock distributed in the southeast from the Buffalo Rock Bottling Company which is a Pepsi distributor. i find that everything has weaker ingredients and less content (versus past versions) for a higher price. …but not Buffalo Rock. throw in a couple of tylenol extra strength and a good meal.

27 05 2008
Prime Minister Cinema

Electrolytes – Physiology. Any of various ions, such as sodium, potassium, or chloride, required by cells to regulate the electric charge and flow of water molecules across the cell membrane.

27 05 2008
TheChad

Yo thas some funny shit! Here’s a quote to sum up the weekend. can’t remember who said it but i thought it was very profound for those of us who sometimes drink unreasonably.

“You’re not drunk until you’re clinging on to the carpet for dear life…”

raise your hand if you’ve actually done it!

dig.

trialandera.wordpress.com

27 05 2008
Cheekie

Sista Toldja – I’m from Chitown, too and I don’t understand the middle school either. When I went to college at NIU (still in Illinois, but if you go outside Chicago, it’s alllll different), everyone and their Mama talked about “middle school” and I looked at them all, “Wha?? Don’t you mean, Grammar school?”. Man, I we all became family pratically living in the same building for 8 or 9 years so I couldn’t imagine being shipped off to another school (and being separated from my homies) when I hit 6th or 7th grade.

Though, I have heard of some middle schools being connected to the elementary school, which WTF, waste of bricks. Just make it ONE building.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Isn’t Chris a little too old to get pissy drunk? Guys like him are so immature. He probably attracts skank whores because no classy blk woman will deal with that shit.That’s probably why he doesn’t date blk women: he can’t get one.

27 05 2008
waa

damn chris! was bougieblkgirl out in front of club 1223 this weekend?

27 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAH@Bougie!!!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

The biggest turn off is a grown ass mab throwing up because he can’t handle his liquior.i also take offense that he is okay with his non blk friends referring to other blks using the “N” word. Chris is a hypocrite since in previous blogs he talked about how upset he got when white folks started using the N word because of Dave Chappelle

27 05 2008
Knatural

Chicken Jon is Black, right? He just looks Asian. 😀

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

My bad, I meant “man”

I also want to add that I’ve read your faq, i get the nature of this website, and I do have a sense of humor. But humor doesn’t have to come at the cost of being racist. If chicken John said that offensive mess in my presence we would have been fighting.

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Isn’t Chris a little too old to get pissy drunk? Guys like him are so immature. He probably attracts skank whores because no classy blk woman will deal with that shit.That’s probably why he doesn’t date blk women: he can’t get one.”

That was hysterical.

Chicken Jon is blacker than Bill Duke. At least on the inside, that is.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Fuck Chicken Jon. I don’t care how much fried chicken he eats or blk friends he has, his comment wasn”t funny.

27 05 2008
Ljones

@ Waa – I am a ride or die chick fo sho’! as for Bougieblkgirl, how about this is Chris’ blog and if you dont’ take offense to him calling an Asian”chickenJon” don’t take offense to that same friend saying “Niggabyte” – that shit is FUNNY!! I don’t care WHO says it!! You sound Like Isaac Hayes with his Southpark BS right now, it’s okay for Chris to offend people of all denominations and creeds but let one of his CLOSE friends get outta hand with a race card and you get pissed! If they weren’t REALLY good friends, they wouldn’t be able to speak candidly about each other’s people’s. Iahve whtie friends, asain friends and I am of mixed race – I offend all kinds of people with my non- pC crap and unless the context was “F U- you NIGGABYTE”, I’m fine with the moniker. If Chris is so much of a hypocrite, i don’t expect to see your “bougie-ASS” on this blog no more! Start a “stuffbougiebitcheslike.com” site. ’nuff siad from this RIDE OR DIE BITCH – BROOKLYN in da house!! Chris, Chicken Jon, I got you son!!

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“I also want to add that I’ve read your faq, i get the nature of this website, and I do have a sense of humor. But humor doesn’t have to come at the cost of being racist. If chicken John said that offensive mess in my presence we would have been fighting.”

Chicken Jon and I have been friends for 15 years. We talk a lot of shit, and there are no limits.

His ‘niggabyte’ comments were always immediately preceded or followed by me referring to him (and/or his kind) as a ‘tunnel-digging gook’, ‘Charlie’, ‘Dr. Squints’, or something else equally racist.

Take it.

27 05 2008
Knatural

Bougie, are you Creole? The word is offensive, but consider the context. And why fight CJ about it?

27 05 2008
london

nigga-fuckin-bytes…
when you’re sick you’re even better you dawg…
i think bougie likes you…. a lot

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Ljones, making fun of someone and racist comments are not the same.Please get the hell out of here with that Issac Hayes analogy. If some random asian or white person called you a nigga on the street, i doubt you will laugh at that shit.

Chris it’s cool. If you are okay with your friends throwing the word nigga around then so be it.

27 05 2008
Ljones

bourgouisie

In common usage the term has pejorative connotations suggesting either undeserved wealth, or lifestyles, tastes, and opinions that lack the sophistication of the rich or the authenticity of the intellectual or the poor.
@blkbourgiegirl- NOW enough said.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

I’m 100% blk. What does my negro make up have to do with the topic at hand?

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Bougie also refers to middleclass. Try again.

27 05 2008
Ljones

bourgouisie

In common usage the term has pejorative connotations suggesting either undeserved wealth, or lifestyles, tastes, and opinions that lack the sophistication of the rich or the authenticity of the intellectual or the poor.
@blkbourgiegirl- NOW enough said, poser.

27 05 2008
Sister Toldja

According to IMDB, Bill Duke is a “Shaven headed, imposing looking African American actor”

BWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAA

Bougie (aka Creole Beauty aka Ethiopian Queen, aka the girl Chris ditched at the prom in 1999)- I don’t get it. Why read and return to throughout the day to comment on, a blog you don’t seem to like? I don’t like the ‘n-word’ use either, but I don’t see why you are here if you don’t like ANYTHING about SBPH.

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Bougie is extra spicy. This is fantastic. I feel better already.

27 05 2008
Ljones

if you knew the WHOLE meaning < i doubt you’d be PROUD to associate yoruself with posers of any class level. Further, ia lready stated that if the context was “F U niggabyte” totally different story, however, Chris has made it VERY clear that HE MEANS to offend, cajole and piss off anyone who takes themselves so seriously. So how about exit outta here and log on to Eric Dyson’s or Montel Williams’ blog or some shit- this e-conversation is over. I am going to hang out with some fellow niggabytes and and laugh at your too serious ass!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

I’m very well aware of the social connotations in the blk community the word bougie has.

I see Chris’ pack of thunder e-hoes are coming out.

27 05 2008
Ljones

Is she truly a girl you dumped- Now I get the notion – she hates you but can’t stay away, Chris, sleepin in a pool of your own vomit- she still wants to be your prom queen. I hope this is entertaining you Chris, ia m enterained, I am always down for knockin’ a mis-informed person down. I bet she doesnt’ come out in the rain either for fear of messing up that blow dry or dare I say – press and curl??

27 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA@e-hoes!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Who said I didn’t get a kick out of this blog. Putting words into my mouth ST? I’m entitled to my opinion like everyone else.

Looks like Ljones is misinformed since I wear my hair natural.

Try again.

27 05 2008
Ljones

Dr. Squints, I LOVE IT> Can’t wait for my asain friend to text me back and call me “platanos and collard greens” a direct dig to my immediate heritage, i will blow her out the water with “DR. Squints”.. thanks Chris!

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

I’d just like to state for the record that I did not sleep in a pool of my own vomit. All the vomit made it into the toilet.

I slept soundly on my nice clean bathroom brushed slate tile floor (it hurt), and my friends can attest that my powder room is a very warm and inviting place with its dim lighting, dark earth-tone color scheme, and cucumber scent sticks.

My bathroom is better than the bedrooms of 95% dudes my age. Dammit.

27 05 2008
Ljones

I am glad you do, I know nothing about you other than your protest to un-pc comments on an un-pc site- go figure. I am glad you wear your hair natural good for you. I wouldn’t expect that from someone who is likes to be known as bougie (another -niggadamus way to spell it) right up there with ANFERNEE. You gon get mad now that one of you own kind called you – Niggadamus or is it okay cause I am black too?? Choose carefully, the dark side of the force is strong in you , it is!

27 05 2008
Ljones

OKAY, OKAY, CHRIS did NOT SLEEP IN A POOL OF HIS OWN VOMIT!! ‘E-thunder hoe out mother goose!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Well then clean bathroom= okay to get fucked up.

One day Chris you are going to wake up next to a hot hoe you banged and discover shim has an adam’s apple.

LJones… U still talking to me? Need attention boo?

27 05 2008
Ljones

So did “the woman” stay or did she get kicked out -or maybe I should just ask blkbougiegirl wanna be Ntzoke Shange over here that question – sike!

27 05 2008
Ljones

u still answering twit? @niggabougiehoe

27 05 2008
Knatural

Cucumber scent sticks? Gay.

27 05 2008
Ljones

Jsut jokes, I find this site amusing, I find the comments amusing and nothing is ever that serious to TRULY be e-arguing. I am just amused at the banter ma, that is all. It’s cool, please believe that.

27 05 2008
Ljones

I say GAY to cucmber stiicks too. Chagne the scent- you want to invite people in to the bathroom or send them to a farmers market?

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Okay Ljones. I see that u need a spot light. My comment was to Chris but u wanted in on the action and now I’m a twit for responding to a comment you made directed at me? Okay boo boo.

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“One day Chris you are going to wake up next to a hot hoe you banged and discover shim has an adam’s apple.”

I am notorious for nut checking people when I’m drunk. This will never happen.

Interesting to note about that night is that I woke up with a blanket on me. This means that I actually walked into the bathroom, vomited for several minutes, walked into the living room and past my couch to get a blanket, then walked past the couch again to go back into the bathroom and fall asleep.

“So did “the woman” stay or did she get kicked out -or maybe I should just ask blkbougiegirl wanna be Ntzoke Shange over here that question – sike!”

‘The Woman’ dropped me off and fled the scene, and rightfully so. But hey, it was Mandrew’s coming home party. I’ll get as drunk as I goddamn well please.

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Cucumber scent sticks? Gay.”

Fuck you, buddy. You know you want some 😉

27 05 2008
Knatural

oooh, West Elm – right across the street. I knew if I insulted your manhood you’d divulge where you got them! Thanks!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Chris you have heard of the pull and tuck method have you?

Or the fact that many shims are getting their nuts cut off and getting makeshift vaginas.

27 05 2008
ishouldbeworking

OMG Bourgie, please let it go! How can you take offense to Chicken John referring to Chris (his longtime friend) as a niggabyte, but you have no problem referring to women that you don’t even know as “e-hoes.” Oh, well I guess it’s ok since you’re a woman and it’s ok for women to call other women hoes.

Of course, you are entitled to your opinion and at least one good thing has come out of your persistent nonsense: you made Chris feel better!

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Chris you have heard of the pull and tuck method have you?

Or the fact that many shims are getting their nuts cut off and getting makeshift vaginas.”

Alcohol’s too good. I’ll just take my chances. Worse things could happen than accidentally banging a dude.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Awww look at thr resident ride or die chicks. Too cute.

27 05 2008
Ljones

@blkbougietwit-never need a spotlight from a poser, I stated this is entertainment to me- you are funny. See Amy winehouse’s first album(Frank) -a track called “fuck me pumps” – this is all you ma! My friends and I are having a good guffaw at your expense. Chris is the one really getting chided left and right over here for allegedly NOT sleeping in his own vomit and having a friend of 15 years e-attacked by you and still he isn’t as bent out shape as you are. Check out the track and holla back. Everybody else, check out that track and let me know what you think – is it bougie blacktwit or what?

27 05 2008
Ljones

all of blkbougie’s talk about fake vagina’s WOW-
you mad that YOU have to “pull and tuck” Mrs. blkbourgiechickwitdick”
“Blkbougietrans”- you like “cremeofsumyoungguy”

27 05 2008
Sylph

I still play “Frank” and I love her version of Moody’s Mood For Love. I miss that Amy.

Glad to see that you’re breathing Chris and feeling somewhat better.

27 05 2008
Knatural

Sylph – stop being an e-hoe!

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

My day is great. Thanks for your concern Ljones. I already told Chris that if he’s okay with his non blk friends saying the N word then fine. Why do u keep beating a dead horse?

I’m also sad for you if the hightlight of your day is gathering around the computer with imaginary friends in a sad attempt to appear superior to me. Your life must not have much substance.

And who still says poser? So sad. I’ll pray for you Ljones. Jesus loves you. God bless.

27 05 2008
Shine

Thunder e-hoe, mind you. This is too damn funny. There’s always someone everyday just to make me smile.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Ljones must be one of those ugly ducklings that never turned into a swan. Why so bitter booboo?

27 05 2008
waa

cucumber anything in your bathroom is gay son…

27 05 2008
london

bougie princess darling manchild…
we know you hot on chris..
he is foine…
you wanna show him a good time with your fake tucked in vajayjay
chris.. show a chick some love.. it will get her off your cock..
she’s a die to ride hoe….

27 05 2008
Ljones

Please believe – never ugly you adama’s apple havin trannie. I am amused by you, my day is so slow today and yes I am enjoying your jawing as well because for every comment I make you have a retort- you have just as many imaginary friends as I do. Don’t send your white jesus my way okay. I am good without your misguided indoctrinations – what you call religion. I don’t feel superior to you but if you THINK i think that, then too bad for you. You can say whatever u like, I am having a ball over here. And not one iota of my self-worth is tied up in what U think of me. And I say “poser”- when the shoe fits, it fits. Plenty of substance in my life, that is EXACTLY why I am SO NOT offended by anything on this site. You mad that Chris is imma ture, you mad taht Chris gets sauced, a single guy with no kids- big fuckin deal- who put crackinyour pancakes? I bet you make a GREAT girlfriend with your uptight ass. Gather up your condoms Chris and ChickenJon- the blkbougiegangbang is about to pull out!!Relax and let your anglo idea of God bless you. I am so fine with my looks, my life, my real friends and imaginary along with my intact sense of humor and politicial view still intact and yes i am sure they are ALL far more superior to yours! Anything else Golum (see lord of the rings) – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9KOEld0hrs

27 05 2008
Ljones

I don’t think you are immature Chris, i was quoting mrs chick wit dicks earlier comment about you, my bad son.

27 05 2008
Sister Toldja

What is it about this blog that makes it such a landing place for bitches?

27 05 2008
london

gotta go watch art of spain.. a genius documentary.. get the whole series from bbc if you can..
holler tomorrer…
bougie… stay tight… fnar fnar..

27 05 2008
Sylph

LMAO@Knat

But I can’t help it. He’s asking for it. Can’t you see he’s asking for it? He never wrote it outright but through erroneous assumptions created from a psycho fairytale, I know that he wants me to be his e-hoe.

…seriously, Chris has never made an overtures to any one of us to become a part of his so called “harem”. It also wasn’t necessary to start placing names on people in the blog. I will though, add e-hoe to my lexicon.

SBPH: Improving the English language, one day at a time.

27 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHKADAHAHHA Thunder e-hoes! Thanks Shine. Like Thundercats??!!?? I’m Cheetara!

27 05 2008
Sylph

If they make a live Thundercats movie, I can definitely see Vin Diesel as Panthro.

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Panthro would clearly be played by Michael Clark Duncan.

Come on now…

27 05 2008
Ljones

@sylph – I miss Amy too, I think she’s gonna go down soon though. She is in a terrible state for real. Those addictions got her bad. And I think you might be right, KNat might want you for himself.
I am out- had an amusing day with the blog. WIll holla manana, maybe bougieblkwhatever can come up with a worthy retort if she practices and calls both of her friends all night and writes among her cats and dinner of sardines and pork and beans!

27 05 2008
Esquire

I find it extremely amusing that Bougieblkgirl obviously kept refreshing the page all while accusing others of not having much substance in thier life of being e-hoes(?) and that other thing she said (? not important enough to scroll back up)

The irony.

…back to work.

27 05 2008
Ljones

Michael Clark duncan -good pic or what about that guy who played Spawn?

27 05 2008
Ljones

you said it Esquire!

27 05 2008
Knatural

Yeah. Panthro was the “black” one. Vin Diesel is too ambiguous to pull it off. Panthro could have been Wesley Snipes if he didn’t screw with Uncle Sam.

27 05 2008
Ljones

how many of you wanna be my imaginary friend?? HA HA HAH A

27 05 2008
Knatural

“And I think you might be right, KNat might want you for himself.” this statement confuses me. Am I supposed to be a dude? I’m a girl, and though I may be a Thunder e-hoe to some, I don’t want anyone but my bastard husband.
That Mummy dude from Thundercats could be Willem Dafoe. He’s scary.

27 05 2008
Muse

Damn what e-thundertrannybougiebabywhite jesus is going on in here?!

BTW is Chicken Jon single? : )

27 05 2008
Muse

I hope everyone had a fun Memorial day. My bday was the 25th and I acted a damn fool. I don’t recall much of the weekend but all I know is I woke up with my homegirl’s shoes on.

27 05 2008
Shine

That’s all Muse? You must be a hell of a sober drunk? I was assuming all sorts of debauchery when you get toasted. This is letting me down.

27 05 2008
Esquire

…how did you end up with her shoes on? sounds like a funny story. do tell

27 05 2008
Ed The Sports Fan

your readers are about as funny as you. and yeah the cucumber sticks are a reach, but with enough swag you can pull that off.

question is…do you even (or did you) get that woman’s number? obviously she was nice enough to take you home, bring you inside. just a thought…

-Ed.
http://www.edthesportsfan.com

27 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“question is…do you even (or did you) get that woman’s number? obviously she was nice enough to take you home, bring you inside. just a thought…”

Haha, wasn’t some random girl or anything (hence ‘the’ woman as opposed to ‘a’ woman).

27 05 2008
Dustin

“Worse things could happen than accidentally banging a dude.”

Bring it.

27 05 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

Chris, hon, even SICK you’re funny as heck! Hope you’re feeling better by now!

I appreciate y’all adding comedy to the end of my day…especially the Bougie troll coming up in the place e-insulting folks (thunder e-hoe is HILARIOUS) about what they CHOSE to do with THEIR personal time and friends over the weekend. If you think someone is immature, why read AND comment? Just click the X at the top of your screen and it’ll ALL go away, yanno?

27 05 2008
Muse

Damn Shine don’t judge me okay? LOL.

My friends took me out for my bday to get shit-faced drunk because they are evil people. When I’m drunk I get rather off the wall and everyone around me ends up in a fit of hysterical laughter because of my antics. Let’s just say I was cooning it up big time that night.

-The bartender made a bet that if I can take 12 kamikaze shots in less than a minute, all the drinks for my friends and I would be on the house for the whole night.

– The Bartender underestimated me. He kept teasing me about being the girl next door.

-The alcohol Gods were watching over me that night because I was able to take the 12 shots in 45 seconds which shocked the bartender because I’m a girl but little did he know that I was destined to be an alcoholic. Needless to say I’m pretty sure the bartender got the pink slip the next day because he had no idea how much we could get down.

-By then I was WASTED, yet I had more shots because the alcohol was free at this point. All I remember are brief flashbacks from that night and one of them is getting dry humped on the dance floor by two guys. One of these guys was 5’7 who insisted on smashing his face into my boobs and shaking his head violently while making these weird sounds with his mouth. I had get away so I excuse myself saying I had to pee.

-One of my guy friends was trying to cut a piece of my cake and he ended up falling into it. Drunk bastard.

-Then I recall wearing a tiara while on the bartender’s shoulders making drinks for folks at the club.

-I remember my friend who is only 5’2 trying to pick me up (I’m 5’9) and carrying me off the dance floor because she was drunk as hell and we ended up falling down. Now I have a big ass bruise on the back of my thighs and right leg as if Ike Turner decided to beat my ass. That is when I believe I lost my shoe.

-Anyway since we are so lame in LA, clubs close at 3am so we had to leave. My other friend, who was being carried by one of our other male buddies, had her shoes so ended up taking hers off and putting them on my feet. However I wasn’t even able to make it three steps so I ended up getting a piggy back ride to the car.

– 12 of us ended up at our friend’s house in Malibu where folks pigged out on egg rolls and chicken nuggets. Mind you we picked up 4 random people from the club and invited them back LOL.

-for whatever reason I felt the need to check my emails and started sending crazy messages at 5am over facebook.

-I woke up around noon with my friend’s shoes still on and two of my friends were asleep in the bathtub with blankets.

-There are pictures but I had to bribe my friend into making sure photos from that night do not end up on facebook.

-I also gave three questionable characters my number. Guys should not ask an obviously drunk girl for her number. Now I have my cell phone off hoping that these dudes will stop calling me because 1) I don’t remember what they look like 2) I was drunk so my judgment was impaired.

Don’t judge me LOL.

27 05 2008
Muse

Just for further clarification, Most of the time I’m sober and the one driving so I rarely get drunk. BUUUUUUUUT since it was my bday I decided to let loose.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

^^^^^no class.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

LJones did a lot of explaining for someone who doesn’t care.

27 05 2008
Bougieblkgirl

Typical yt girl behavior to drunk and not rememeber the night. Pathetic.

27 05 2008
Seraph

Helluva weekend! Feel better soon.

27 05 2008
Yonnie3k

ROFLMBAO @ Muse!!

-Then I recall wearing a tiara while on the bartender’s shoulders making drinks for folks at the club.

This couldn’t have really happened. Surely this was a dream.

27 05 2008
vitazza

somone seems hungry leave no crumbs for gollum

27 05 2008
Dani

@ London “she’s a die to ride hoe….”

Dead okay….

What exactly is it about this site that causes random people to drop in and talk shit about Chris and/or the daily readers without provocation?

27 05 2008
puff

@ muse that’s one hell of a birthday lmao at the dry-humping midget with the boob infatuation. i need to get drunk more often. i’ll go start now…

28 05 2008
letinstar

dang…i’m so on the late show today…i started a new job and haven’t had access to the internet yet…

anyways, chris, i hope you feel better…did your woman atleast hold your hair while you heaved? it’s a real bitch when you find yourself alone, in the bathroom with your head propped on the cool toilet, trying to keep it together…

28 05 2008
iheartpopeyes

oh man y’all are hilarious.

cucumber scent sticks are real gay but sometimes its nice to have something in the bathroom that smells good when you are vomiting uncontrollably. i prefer something lemon-y, but whatever floats your boat man.

28 05 2008
Nice

Sounds like how alot of my weekends have went down- in my past. Hope ya feel better.

28 05 2008
ninabrown

damn, i can’t remember “saturday”. at least i have five days left of the school year.

28 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Sick? Hungover and vomitting bile. Feel better, hydrate, and get some sympathy ____ from ‘the woman’.”

Haha, just saw this. Yea there’ll probably be none of that going on.

“…did your woman atleast hold your hair while you heaved?”

Not ‘my’ woman, just ‘the’ woman. Don’t want her flipping her wig for claiming her prematurely 😛

28 05 2008
shabooty

chris u dont [might not] remember this but sat i ran into u at the club,
was about to say something to you, you accidentally hit an indian bitch in the face, i go *nevermind* under my breath to pretend like i dunno you, she looks at you crazy, i have a blank face, she walks off w/ a dumb *just got hit in the face look*, i go dude u just hit that indian cunty in the face on accident, and you go -who cares?
LOL

🙂

28 05 2008
Choco_Gnome

if people don’t like what the blogger has to say…
…and they hate the other commenters/comments on the board…
…then what is their objective with constantly shooting down others in the commentary other than to you know…become a e-celeb for a day or whatever gets their rocks off i guess…

e-hoe signing off

28 05 2008
ph2072

You’re funny even when you’re sick. 🙂 I’m assuming you were too busy throwing up to get any ass from “the woman”.

Get well soon.

28 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“chris u dont [might not] remember this but sat i ran into u at the club,
was about to say something to you, you accidentally hit an indian bitch in the face, i go *nevermind* under my breath to pretend like i dunno you, she looks at you crazy, i have a blank face, she walks off w/ a dumb *just got hit in the face look*, i go dude u just hit that indian cunty in the face on accident, and you go -who cares?
LOL :)”

I refuse to believe that you a.) intentionally dressed well enough to get into Park, or b.) let me elbow a chick before you.

28 05 2008
Shine

Muse, I must apologize. That is much more like what I thought would happen when you got shitfaced. Thank you for making my day. A day late but still enjoyable.

28 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA You ‘accidently’ hit an Indian (dot) girl in the face?!?!?! Poor Punjab.

28 05 2008
rai

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! poor baby. never been to 1223 on a sunday. was it good times and were the drinks cheap? and chris parties waaaaay harder than I do. def couldn’t hang with the way ya’ll drink. . . on am empty stomach lol

and *doubled over in pain from laughin* @ poor punjab

28 05 2008
shabooty

yeah, it’s poonjab not facejab
🙂
kno’ which hole to hit em in…

2 06 2008
d teezy

haha alcoholic, that’s a weekend there! but nice….

2 06 2008
d teezy

haha alcoholic, that’s a weekend there! but nice….

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