Looney Tunes

2 05 2008

Three things happened yesterday that made me quite upset:

  1. I dropped several thousand hackle feathers all the fuck over the floor in my condo
  2. Walking into the elevator with my headdress and eagle feathers, some stupid chick asked me “OMIGOD ARE YOU A REAL INDIAN?!?!?!”
  3. I watched Looney Tunes for five fucking hours

Watching Looney Tunes for so damn long reminded me of a cartoon I saw as a child, where Bugs Bunny somehow wound up in what was called “Deepest Darkest Africa” and spent the episode making an ass out of an African native that was drawn to look like an eggplant with feet and a spear. What disturbs me about this memory is that this racist fucking cartoon was aired as late as the early 90’s.

Anyone on this board over the age of 21 or so probably has racist Looney Tunes episodes seared deeply into their memories – which makes the following statement by Wikipedia about the ‘Censored Eleven‘ complete and utter bullshit:

“The ban [on showing the censored 11] has been upheld by UA and the successive owners of the Looney Tunes catalog to this day, and these shorts have not been officially broadcast on television since the late 1960s.”

I specifically remember watching the episode ‘All This and Rabbit Stew‘ several times on cable (I believe the station was TNT) in the early 90’s, and ‘Jungle Jitters’ is probably the episode featuring Deepest Darkest Africa and the eggplant man.

Figure 1: I’ve seen this cartoon before, and I’m pretty sure I wasn’t alive in 1968

What the hell can I say – people were racist as shit back in the day, and the intended audience for Looney Tunes was, as Friz Freeling partially admitted, intended for racist fucking white people. No small wonder that the Warner Brothers, all four of whom were apparently Jewish, still bought the Looney Tunes series despite innumerable negative references to Jews.

For those who want to get mad by experiencing the racism in visual form, enjoy this.

Racism aside, I enjoyed Looney Tunes because it was undeniably fucking hilarious. This is why I was emotionally devastated when I came upon the following:


Figure 2: There is no God

Apparently in 2005, someone took the friendly characters from Looney Tunes (Bugs, Daffy, Wyle E. Coyote, Taz, and the Roadrunner) and injected them with Agent Orange or some shit. Now these clever characters have been reborn as ‘The Loonatics’, who in the image above are depicted as soulless and unnecessarily badass spreaders of the X-treme marketing virus hell bent on leaping out of my computer screen and punching me in the testicles.

Let’s take a look at each of these characters in turn:

1.) Ace Bunny – (pictured at the center) Ace Bunny appears to be the craziest out of the entire group, which is impressive considering that not one character even has pupils. Ace’s tightly clenched fists, inexplicably sharp teeth, scimitar-shaped ears, and what appears to be a twitching right eye symptomatic of severe stress, seem to indicate that the sole purpose of Ace Bunny is to rape your dog and murder your family.

2.) Danger Duck – (bottom left) is actually the most normal-looking of the bunch, in spite of the fact that his soulless eyes are given a red hue to indicate that he’s been to Hell at least once. Danger’s predecessor, Daffy Duck, was fairly lanky, out of shape, and had hands that resembled feathers – but the new Danger duck appears, at least in this image, to be rather broad shouldered and have fists cast of solid bronze. I’ve never seen the cartoon, but I’m pretty sure that at some point Danger has uttered the phrase “feathers are for cunts.”

3.) Tech E. Coyote – (far left) was always green with envy at the Roadrunner in the original cartoon, and for the Loonatics series has been rendered literally so. Recognizing the fact that our children are indeed dumber than ever and have no idea what the word ‘wily’ means (or the ability to associate ‘wile’ as a pun on ‘wild’), the creators apparently made Wyle E. Coyote take a fucking MCSE exam and become Tech E. Coyote – the cheesiness of which is borderline criminal, but nonethless simple enough for our stupid ass uncultured electronically-obsessed fatass children to comprehend.

4.) Slam Tasmanian – (top) has a fist bigger than his fucking head even if you adjust for perspective, (we can only assume he uses that fist to beat unwilling women into submission), and 95% of his face is composed of innumerable gigantic teeth because apparently his character was modeled after Terrell Owens. The enormous size of Slam is not done justice by the above picture, so I’ve included another:

Figure 3: Seriously, dude. There is NO God.

Slam clearly weighs at least a metric ton and is suffering from an X-TREME case of ‘Roid Rage. One can’t help but notice that his transformation from ‘Tazmanian Devil’ in Looney Tunes to ‘Slam Tazmania’ in Loonatics is not at all unlike Barry Bonds’ transformation from man to Silverback Gorilla between 1986 and today, and is therefore a horrible example for our children.

5.) Rev Runner – (far right) is so fucking goddamn X-TREME that he’s the only bird I’ve ever seen with teeth. TEETH ON A BIRD, DUDE. I am willing to bet my life that right now somewhere in the country, some middle schooler is flunking a science test because he sees this question…

  • True or False: Birds have teeth

…and then thinks to himself: “AH! REV RUNNER HAS TEETH! TRUE!”

Fail. That child will spend the rest of his life asking people if they’d like to try a combo.

6.) Lexi Bunny – (bottom right) I’m not too sure why they didn’t just cut the bullshit and call her ‘Sexy Bunny’ or ‘Flexibunny’ or ‘Slutty Bunny Cum Bucket’. Is there any coincidence that Lexi is positioned below Ace’s left nut? Anyhow, the creators of the show clearly wanted to introduce sexual tension to the show while a.) maintaining plausible deniability of said introduction, and b.) at the same time assuaging the oh so annoying Girl-Power lobby. To this end, Lexi has been given scythe-like dagger hands that suggest awesome fighting prowess and excruciatingly painful sex all at the same time.

Figure 4: Come back, guys. Please?

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280 responses

2 05 2008
Yonnie3k

Yaaaaayyyyy!!!! Chris is back! Hope you’re feeling better.

2 05 2008
Lady

I hate the new school spins they put on old school cartoons.. Tom and Jerry (also a racist cartoon) had some shit called the Tom and Jerry Kids, Animaniacs (well.. that was kinda funny) and some other mess I can’t think of at the moment.

Looney Tunes used to be one of my favorite things to watch with my father. Yosimite Sam was a racist bastid but I loved him. Foghorn Leghorn was Black. As was Daffy Duck. Those were my three favorite characters.. I remember watching Jungle Jitters with him and he kept sucking his teeth and he changed the channel but I never knew why.

They were also horrible when it came to anyone from Asian decent, they always had slits for eyes and giant teeth, that much i remember.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Oh, thank you lords of fuckery.

What did you reply to the Einstein in the elevator? Or what did you want to say?

You need to hang out with more fatass children because we watch Invader Zim, Samurai Jack and Pukka around here.

2 05 2008
benjie

i remember the deepest darkest africa cartoons.

remember when elmer fudd was looking for the dodo?
and he flew his wee lil plane over the continent and it just kept getting darker, and darker… i never knew how to describe the people, but eggplants with legs will suffice. i just remember that all i could see was an insane amount of blinding white teeth.

when i asked my mom why, she just said that all the cartoonists back in the day were bigoted assholes.

don’t even get me started on the mexican references.

…chris i’m dying to know what your response was to the white chick in the elevator.

2 05 2008
stuffgirlslike

I am more worried by the racism in the “Lion King” and its subliminal messages.

Did you ever like a cartoon then you start seeing the racism creep over the show?

I pretended that tom and jerry and the obese maid were not really racist because I was by then addicted to the show.

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

2 05 2008
Knatural

AHAHAHAHAHAH…does anyone remember that scene in ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit?’ where Daffy Duck and Donald Duck were piano-dueling? Well, Donald got so frustrated with Daffy’s ‘shenanigans’ that he called the Black duck what sounded like a muffled N-Word.
My grandma would tell me from childhood how racist those cartoons are…remember those Black crows? Buggs Bunny was cross-dressing asshole anyway. Carrot-eating bastard.

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Fail. That child will spend the rest of his life asking people if they’d like to try a combo.

EPIC FAIL. And I can confirm that kids will actually believe this shit.

Slutbucket Cum Bunny???? BWHAHAHAHAHA. My soul needed that!

I remember reading about the Censored Eleven and I DEFINITELY have seen Coal Black and the Seben Dwarves, plus mad other racist ass Looney Tunes. I was too angry a child to watch that and Tom and Jerry with that fucking mammy.

I never liked that crap anyway, it took away valuable Barbie doll and tea party time.

2 05 2008
dynamicdiva

I watched Looney Toons as a kid and loved it. As I got older I was told that Daffy Duck was “black” I became pissed off. Especially since Daffy was always making those crazy noises and jumping all over the place. Never did like Elmer Fudd. Hated his hat and nose. lol

I liked that stupid frog that wouldn’t sing in public.. that was looney tunes, right?!

2 05 2008
ndenise

Rev Runner? I think I know a certain someone who might take issue with that:

2 05 2008
Lindsay

Oh don’t get me started on Lion King.

Why is it that the one time Disney makes a movie that’s set in a place in which the human characters would be black, it has no humans?

Ok, ok, Bambi had no humans either. But at least there was a hunter.

2 05 2008
ndenise

Rev Runner?

(please delete my last comment. I forgot the link!)

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Damn i saw that episode too when i was little and ofcourse I didnt understand but now that I have seen Looney Tunes as an adult that shit is fucked up but its still funny to me. Like Pepe le Peu that dude is a freakin pervert/ potential rapest! I hate cartoons now! OMGGGGG especially these remakes of old cartoon characters and stuff. The shows these kids have today suck ass!!!! For example Sponge Bob I wanted to strangle myself 5 minutes in to the show watching it with my step-daughter.

I loved the Animaniacs!@ Lady

2 05 2008
Onion

lol This is great.

My absolute favorite response to the Loonatics.

Definitely NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

2 05 2008
Shine

I’m so fucking sad now. I loved Looney Tunes. The monstrocities look like if they hit you with an anvil your head would pop off and they would eat it.

And yes I’ve seen most all of those racist ass cartoons and I was born in the eighties. Also I used to watch Mighty Mouse as a kid (also racist but somehow I still enjoyed it) and I bought a DVD with one Mighty Mouse and some of the most racist cartoons I’ve ever seen. They had this one where 3 white sheep were singing and then get covered in coal dust and all of a sudden their skirts get short and they start singing in deeper (sexier) voices and shit. And I bought this DVD 4 years ago. Bastards tried to be slick slipping that cartoon in with my Mighty Mouse.

Also Pucca is great. An absolute ridiculous cartoon. I used to watch it when it was just a Korean web phenom with MashiMaro which makes a lot less sense to me.

2 05 2008
benjie

animaniacs were my favorite.
actually most of the cartoons that came on the now defunct WB were good.
hysteria! was hilarious. they need that on dvd.

cartoons themselves have fallen off.

i miss pepper ann.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

knatrual-AHAHAHAHAHAH…does anyone remember that scene in ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit?’ where Daffy Duck and Donald Duck were piano-dueling? Well, Donald got so frustrated with Daffy’s ’shenanigans’ that he called the Black duck what sounded like a muffled N-Word.
My grandma would tell me from childhood how racist those cartoons are…remember those Black crows? Buggs Bunny was cross-dressing asshole anyway. Carrot-eating bastard.

thats is wayyy too funny hahahhahahahhahahah carrot-eating bastard hahhaha i think i know what your talking about in “who framed roger rabbit”. BTW i love that movie too 🙂

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Dead@ that video Onion
omg hahhahahahahah

2 05 2008
Knatural

I loved Animaniacs and Pinky & the Brain! Cartoons now suck! HARD. Except the more ‘adult’ stuff like Family Guy.

2 05 2008
Lady

@ Mrs. Epps

The cartoons today are really sad. I started ordering old cartoons on DVD for my son because it’s sad. He loves spongebob, I can’t stand that show..

I mean, not that my fav cartoons were any better as far as my parents were concerned:

Ducktales
Darkwing Duck
He-man
Thundercats
Transformers
Voltron (yes I was a tomboy)..

All the cartoons they have today have some seriously underlying sexual suggestions (patrick and spongebob are gay) and contain a lot of burping, farting, or the ones that cater to girls are all about appearance, being pretty, shopping, getting boys to like you.. I’m like WTF?

The only thing I can stomach is Fairly Odd Parents.. don’t judge me…

2 05 2008
benjie

fairly odd parents is my shit!!

now i’m gonna be sitting here watching youtube all day instead of working.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Lady-Ducktales
Darkwing Duck
He-man
Thundercats
Transformers
Voltron (yes I was a tomboy)..

HELL YES!!! I loved all those shows! I even watched the Hulk,rugrats and some other stuff i cant think of right now. I miss the kid version of Ninja warrior( wild n crazy kids) sighs…I miss the old Nick and disney. BUt I agree i do like Fairly Odd parents too, I can tolerate that.

2 05 2008
Knatural

YES Lady! I heart you!
Ducktales (how come Scrooge McDuck never broke his neck diving in a vault full of gold?)
He-man & She-ra
Thundercats
Gem (FUCKING LOVED)

2 05 2008
Knatural

Sorry, Jem, Jem and the Holograms!

2 05 2008
Lady

@ Mrs. Epps don’t get me started on nick game shows… those still come on and I can at least watch those w/ my son and get all nostalgic.

Guts
Double Dare
Legend of the Hidden Temple

I like Rugrats, I can watch that too.

I can go on and on w/ the cartoons.. Garfield, Heathcliff, Ghost busters (even the racist one where the black guy was a gorilla.. and this is in the 80’s!), Rescue Rangers, Inspector Gadget

But Ducktales is/was my ish.. I would be so INTO that show after school you couldnt tell me nothing..

2 05 2008
benjie

Legends of the Hidden Temple!!

Olmec used to freak me out cause the only thing that moved was his lips.

remember salute your shorts?
i have that on dvd.
that and david the gnome…

oh my childhood.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

damn i forgot about Heathcliff and Rescue Rangers I would watch those after school!!

2 05 2008
Knatural

Oh god, Double Dare. That host would irritate me so much. You remember ‘You Can’t Do That on Television’? I loved that show. And Muppet Babies!

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Loonatics looks like the least interesting shit ever. I hate modern cartoons and kids shows, minus That’s So Raven (I just love that girl). When my students talk about Hannah Montana I want to shoot them and her and myself. And there is no reason for a 12-year-old Black girl to walk around reading Teen Bop or whatever the fuck the White equivalent of Black Beat is and clipping pictures of Zack And Cody for their lockers. Yuck. What is it with young girls and super effiminate boys?

Reason 40080 that I am NOT ready for motherhood yet. I’d have to drink waaaay toooo much to not kill one of my little ones, and they’d be all “Waaah, waaah. I’m sick of Spike Lee movies, why we can’t watch Spongebob????” and I’d be like “Cause that shit is WACK!”

2 05 2008
Knatural

Fraggle Rock!
*I hate you*

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

OMGGGGGGGGGGGG Salute your shorts….remeber that show are you affried of the dark and goose bumps!!!

Sheds a tear..i missing the good ol days sighs..

now all there is Hannha Montana, Sponge bob, Dora the explorer, The wiggles(gag).

2 05 2008
Lady

Muppet. Babies.

The inner child in me just yelped. I LOVED that show.. even though Nanny used to creep me out cause all you could see was her damn socks.

Nice trip down memory lane for all my 80’s (and maybe even 70’s) babies. This is the good stuff.. i didnt watch them all.. but most

2 05 2008
Lady

Ooooh @ Are you afraid of the dark… that used to scare the crap out of me.. and Goosebumps

The original All That w/ Keenan Thompson, Josh Server n’nem.. in the words of DJ Khaled.. da bessssss

2 05 2008
Onion

@ Lady

Yay, Darkwing Duck!

Boo, lack of Rescue Rangers, Gargoyles, and Talespin! I loved me some Animaniacs and Tiny Toons, as well. Before that? C.O.P.s.

“It’s crime fighting time.”

Heh. I don’t think the quality of cartoons has dropped. It just went from being all ages to being primarily targeted at children. You know those old Merry Melody and Loony Toons episodes were full of double entendre (which is why Animaniacs was so hilarious).

I watch a lot of anime these days. There are still smart and entertaining cartoons being produced. Ghost in the Shell ain’t Sponge Bob.

Just don’t hate on my Pokemon.
A brother has to watch his Pokemon is all I’m saying.

2 05 2008
Lolo

What the hell is wrong with Spongebob?? So, him and Patrick are teh gei for each other, so what? It’s not like they’re buttpumping or anything even close to that, they’re just a couple dorks that revel in their jellyfishing antics. Sheesh, people.

Spongebob, Jimmy Neutron, Grimm and Mandy. There is nothing wrong with some fartin and boogers for kids to laugh about.

You guys are a buncha cranky young ones, honestly.

(I so hate Family Guy and that is my 13 year old’s fave. Every time I have to sit through one I swear my brain dries out a little more)

2 05 2008
benjie

ALL THAT!!!

i still remember the theme song.

i know that this is showing how old i am, but my aunt took me to see the taping of the pilot of that show.

baggin saggin berry…

remember my brother and me??

2 05 2008
Knatural

Gargoyles YES! I loved that show; it was so dark and they had all those Shakespeare references (yes, I’m a nerd). I’m surprised no one mentioned G.I. Joe! G.I. Joe. G.I. Joe.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Avatar the Last Airbender!!!

We looooove that and just watch those reruns while we wait and wait and WAIT for the next season.

2 05 2008
Onion

@ Knatural
(how come Scrooge McDuck never broke his neck diving in a vault full of gold?)

It was his special ability. That explained that mess in the Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck comic. You should read that comic. Dude was BAD. ASS.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Sister T-Reason 40080 that I am NOT ready for motherhood yet. I’d have to drink waaaay toooo much to not kill one of my little ones, and they’d be all “Waaah, waaah. I’m sick of Spike Lee movies, why we can’t watch Spongebob????” and I’d be like “Cause that shit is WACK!”

girl your a mess hahahah but i would do the same thing too. Me and my step-daughter last weekend:
Aalicia-I wanna watch cartoons
Me-Girl we havent watched real tv all day but some damn cartoons.
Aalicia-But I wanna watch cartoons thought pleaseeeee
Me- Whats that gotta do with me go play with your moon sand cuz we aint watching no more damn Jimmy Neutron or Hanna Montana
Aalicia- YOUR MEAN IM NOT YOUR FRIEND(smacks my leg) IM TELLING MY DADDY..DADDDDDYYYYYYYY
Me- Tell your daddy what he gonna do and since you got that attitude and rolling your eyes and then hit me put your nose ont he wall.

haha

2 05 2008
Onion

@ benjie

Temple was brutal. How the hell am I supposed to remember all this?!

http://olmecguide.ytmnd.com/

2 05 2008
aphrican violet

Few things irk me more than seeing the African continent portrayed as the origin of evil, as a land of violent savages, or, a land of f*ckwits from a decade gone.

You can stop kids from watching racist cartoons. Sadly, you can’t stop universities from propagating Looney Tunes style racism through “classic literature”.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heart_of_Darkness

@ Lady & Mrs. Epps: Thundercats HOOOO!! I loved that show so much, I was Cheetara for Halloween 3 years ago.

2 05 2008
benjie

onion-

i used to feel bad for those kids. how do you go from like 6 teams to 2?
yellow monkeys
purple sasquatches
whatever.
then they ask ridiculous questions and make you run around a maze with scary white people dressed up like mayans popping up out of nowhere.

and then, when you won (finally) they gave you a casio keyboard and a bike.

…thats it?

2 05 2008
Natalie

Please please PLEASE tell me this is not still on the air. I didn’t even know they made this cartoon until I saw this post. I think I’m going to go somewhere in the corner of my office and become violently ill…

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Temple was the ishhhH lol@ at the site and the tiki voice hahahah

benji-i used to feel bad for those kids. how do you go from like 6 teams to 2?
yellow monkeys
purple sasquatches
whatever.
then they ask ridiculous questions and make you run around a maze with scary white people dressed up like mayans popping up out of nowhere.

and then, when you won (finally) they gave you a casio keyboard and a bike.

…thats it?

thats one of the only reasons i wouldnt want to be on that show if i had the chance cuz of those dumbass prizes.. wtf i want a keyboard for?(i already had one) and I already got a bike hahahha I WANT CASH AND VACATION TICKETS!!

2 05 2008
maya

GEM (Absolute must)
Darkwing Duck
Duck Tales
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (complete with my simple ass doing a spin on my back with the opening credits)
Fraggle Rock
The Muppet Show (on occasions)
Muppett Babies
Anamaniacs

WTF was Tiny Toons? So wack.

2 05 2008
Tamara

Is it sad I sometimes watch Muppet Babies and Tom and Jerry in the morning before class?

I’m forever young ya’ll, forever young.

Speaking of old shows, does anyone remember Gummy Bears (the ones that lived in a tree and when they drank that juice they’d bounce all over the place), Salute your Shorts was also a personal favorite, and Are you afraid of the dark? used to scare the beejeezus out of me.

2 05 2008
Lindsay

Captain Planet, anyone?

2 05 2008
benjie

gummmmmmy beaaaaaarrrrs bouncing here and there and everywhere
high adventures that’re beyond compare
they are the gummy bears.

they were sippin syrup
that’s the only explanation i have for the juice that they would drink

2 05 2008
Knatural

Captain Planet, he’s our hero, gonna take polution down to zero…
THE POWER IS YOURS!
*I hate everyone*

2 05 2008
Lady

Oh snap, how can I forget about Avatar? I love that cartoon.. I consider it more Anime though.. and let’s not go there.. cause I got a list..

Lady heart’s Aapa 🙂

Jimmy Neutron is cool too.. even though I get grossed out sometimes.. (talent show booger bubble. that is all)

I guess because I understand more of Spongebob than my son does it gets on my nerves a little.. that subliminal mess ain’t no joke though.. Of course my son’s fav character is Patrick and he went through this period where he thought it was cool to be dumb.. i had to explain to him many times why it’s important to be as smart as you can be.. which is not a problem for me cause I talk to my kids.. but i wonder about the parents who dont and their kids are thinking it’s cool to be dumb as well…

Although i was enthralled during one episode.. I can’t front.. Squidward is that dude..

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Captin Planet OMMMGGG yesss and Power Rangers(dont hate)

2 05 2008
Knatural

Ma-Ti was a bitch. What kind of Planeteer power is ‘heart’
Captain Planet’s mullet was scary.

2 05 2008
Lady

@ Epps

Maaaan double dare was no better.. the prize would be a manual tran station wagon w/ wood paneling on the outside.. wtf?

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ benji – loving how you went back to david the gnome! i loved that show! Is anyone else in here old enough to have watched care bears?

I think there’s value in some of the new stuff on tv. I’ve re-invested myself in cartoons. I do love fairly odd parents, jimmy neutron, and even spongebob. you can’t get better nonsense cartoon sea-coonery anywhere else.

And I absolutely HATE dora and diego. even though my kid likes all the songs. But the great Nick Jr. ish is The Backyardigans. They actually have a character in the show that’s a little ladybug named….. wait for it….. Uniqua!

2 05 2008
benjie

okay, one last thing and then i seriously need to do some work

remember the black history month episode of captain planet?
kwame and the one with the fire (i forgot his name) were trying to stop the gang violence…

idk why, but that one cracks me up everytime i see it.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

lmao @ scary capt’n planet mullet!

gummy bears was the greatest too!

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

watched carebears faithfully@ scarlet

2 05 2008
Sir Raj

I felt it necessary to comment on the Backyardigans, because I loooooove that show. They throw down on there….and I watch it even when I’m not babysitting……..

2 05 2008
Lolo

I can’t wait for these elections to be over because now, every time I see and hear Mayor Nutter I just see Squidward “waah waah waah stupid Spoooongebob and all your hoope, yah right.”

I just pointed out to my kids that Patrick lives under a rock. The End. At least Spongebob has a job …. hahahaha, god. Kids are so gullible you can make anything into a lesson.

2 05 2008
Lindsay

In hindsight, I argue that Captain Planet himself was a bitch.

How is it that you can throw oil or coal on someone…no, not someone…a superhero – and he can’t take it, and then gives the “power” back to the planeteers?

Sorry, Captain Planet.

The earth is stronger than that.

2 05 2008
Monie

I would be willing to wager that these racist cartoons are still being shown in other parts of the world like Asia, parts of Europe and Mexico.

And speaking of racist cartoons; has anyone heard of memin penguin?

2 05 2008
Lady

@ Scarlet

I like Nick Jr.

Max & Ruby … I watch on my own sometimes.. Same with Oswald and Little Bill….. Backyardigans is cute too.. i like their songs..

Don’t judge me..

2 05 2008
maya

LMAO @ syrup sippin carebears.

Does anyone remember the show “Small Wonder” with Vicki the robot?

And dare I say…”Beverly Hills Teens”

2 05 2008
scarletjones

Did anyone watch Hey Arnold? my son just got a hey arnold sticker from a nurse at his last dr’s appt, and i was like “do kids these days even know about this cartoon?” and then i remembered how i always thought that it was messed up that they made all those little kids in the borough have wierd shaped heads and faces?

2 05 2008
Knatural

@ Lolo – Samurai Jack! I love how seriously that cartoon took himself! Does anyone remember the X-Men Cartoons from the early 90s? THE BEST!

2 05 2008
maya

I’m also bout to take yall back to the old school Nick Jr.

Can I get a witness on David the Gnome?

2 05 2008
Knatural

And Carebears was too gey, sorry.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Man, we used to love Max and Ruby. Also? If you ever get a chance, catch George and Martha with the kids. Tooooo funny.

2 05 2008
Tamara

I loved Power Rangers until they got rid of the original cast and started being on some next stuff (like going into outer space, wooooomp) and I so wanted to be a Planeteer, definitely used pretend I was one with my ring pops.

Oh wait I still do that sometimes :o/

Definitely loved Carebears too, and My Little Pony.

@Benjie, I’m glad you sang the theme song, cause I didn’t want to go there.

My little sisters put me on to Avatar, it’s definitely crack, and thanks to them I’m addicted to numerous shows on Cartoon Network.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ lady, i love my Nick Jr. Backyardigans & max and ruby is my joint! wow wow wubbzy! i like old blues clues with steve, not the other guy they have now. and I’ve come to accept the wonder pets because it’s short.

and i watch yo gabba gabba more like a person watches a train wreck… and because i am almost completely convinced that the dude that plays DJ lance is this dude i went to high school with that was the head of the cheerleading squad! ha ha.

2 05 2008
Lindsay

@ Maya –

Yes, I remember Small Wonder.

It came on at like 5 or 6 a.m. down here.

She was so not robotic.

2 05 2008
benjie

lolo-
he does look like squidward!!!! oh god people would laugh at me cause i said i couldn’t look at him b/c of his massive nose. lmao.

maya-
small wonder was the jawn.

can’t remember the name of this other show…help me.
the daughter was half alien, her father was from another planet. she could stop time with her hands….

2 05 2008
scarletjones

Old x-men is the ONLY x-men any kid should be watching. That joint rocked!

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

I HATED Legends of The Hidden Temple! Boooooring!

TMNT was my shiznit. I had the biggest crush on Raphael. I always go for the assholes. I even had a crush on Peter Vekman from Ghostbusters (not Bill Murray, the cartoon one). I was obsessed with all things Ghostbusters, yo. Anyone remember Bobby Brown’s cameo in Ghostbusters II: “Ay yo, you think y’all can get my little brother one of them proton packs?”! CLASSIC! And “On Our Own” was the closing theme, remember? “Too hot to handle, too cold to hold/They’re called the Ghostbusters and they’re in control….”

And least we not forget Alvin, Simon and Theodore.

2 05 2008
Knatural

I heart Maya! SMALL WONDER, that awful red-and-white dress, and their annoying-ass redheaded neighbor. That’s not a cartoon, though. But I loved that show. That and Charles-In-Charge.
Power Rangers was shitty gayness. If anything was racist, that show was. Why was the Black dude dressed in black, the Asian chick dressed in yellow, and the White chick dressed in pink? I got to old to appreciate the campiness of that show, I think.
Who remembers the Ewoks cartoon!!!!!?????!!!!

2 05 2008
maya

Push Pop
Ring Pop
Charms Blow Pop (“…take one, ACTION!” …damn that commercial)
Candy Cigarettes (which I wasn’t allowed to have)
And my personal favorite: Dip Stix

Mmmm sugary goodness.

2 05 2008
shine

Oh man, I’m glad I’m not the only one that has a bunch of old cartoons at home. And Sista Toldja don’t worry about the kids, you can do like Lady does and my mom and just make them watch old and worthy cartoons. I’m probably the only person born in the eighties that even knows about Beany and Cecil and thats because my mom thought that was a better cartoon (and what is a better cartoon that lets the characters say ‘what the heck’ every 5 seconds and takes them to an island called Nobikin Atoll).

And I know all the words to the Ducktales theme. I was singing them in car as I drove from Jersey to DC on Tuesday. Huge 8 year old at heart

David the Gnome
Rainbow Brite
Shirttails
Pinwheel
Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego
Fraggle Rock
He-man/She-ra
Ghostwriter
Ghostbusters
Space Ghost (and space ghost coast to coast)
Whatever that show was with gloop and gleep as though big bags of nasal ejaculate that walked around making weird noises in the stone age future… Herculoids was it?
Pretty much anything that came on Cartoon Express (laffalympics all day!)
I could obviously go on and on…

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ benji – i think the show you mean is “out of this world”

samurai jack was great. my husband used to crack up everytime they showed this episode where jack was fighting this bounty hunter and was like “no money for you… crazy round man!” i miss the old cartoon network. power puff girls, dexter, johnny bravo.

2 05 2008
maya

“I had the biggest crush on Raphael.”

LMAO @ ST. Thank you for not making me feel weird for liking a cartoon TURTLE, because I had a crush on Michaelangelo. I always like the clowns.

Question of the day, why does Lloyd look like Splinter?

2 05 2008
Tamara

@ Maya: yes for David the Gnome

Bill Nye the Science Guy anyone?
Ghostwriter?
WIld and Crazy Kids?
Gulla Gulla Island?

Why can’t I go back to the 90’s when life was so SIMPLE?!?!

2 05 2008
Lady

@ lady, i love my Nick Jr. Backyardigans & max and ruby is my joint! wow wow wubbzy! i like old blues clues with steve, not the other guy they have now

Hell yea cause he got them caterpillar eye brows.. them shits scare me..

@ Benjie, you mean out of this world.. i used to watch that.. and Alf

@ ST
I thought i was the only one who had a cartoon crush on Peter from Ghostbusters.. *SO* glad I’m not the only one..

2 05 2008
Tamara

oh and I forgot Kids Incorporated.

2 05 2008
maya

OMG… Ghostwriter!!!!! Why did I have a marble copybook so I could do that dumb shit along with them. And the remember when Gaby and that boy started liking each other? And the Asian girl and the black boy I think.

Carmen Sandiego was my shit. I had that game.

Speaking of games, why did I think I was the biggest boss cause I had my Super Nintendo and Street Fighter II. Chun Li was my girl!

2 05 2008
shine

OH shit i also had a crush on raphael. How fucked up is it to have a crush on a cartoon turtle. I even liked him in the many animatronic movies. I also had a crush on Gambit from the 90s X-men. That new X-men they have now sucks, much like the new transformers sucked too.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

kids in-cor-po-rated.. k.. i… d…. s… yeah!

2 05 2008
Lady

I saw the PPG movie… in theaters.. Mojo Jojo and n’nem… crazy!!

2 05 2008
Tamara

@Shine, I definitely had a crush on Gambit too. That was my boo and you couldn’t tell me nothing.

Since Maya brought back Street Fighter, was it wrong I stayed up until like 3am one night and watched Mortal Kombat the movie?

“GET OVER HEREEEEEE!!!!”

2 05 2008
scarletjones

“Hell yea cause he got them caterpillar eye brows.. them shits scare me..” – Lady

yeah he does! and he seems so scummy! he reminds me of Joey from friends! lol

2 05 2008
Knatural

oh my god. Herculoids. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP
The 80s everything = the best. I hate all of you for bringing up the best forms of entertainment. Karate Kid, Culture Club, New Edition, Muppet Babies, Fall Guy, TNMT, V the mini-series, Full House, on and on and on. I hate you guys. I’m going to lunch!

2 05 2008
Esquire

Lolo I HEART George and Martha.

Several things are troubling me today.

1. I need to know if Smurfette was truly a whore with white pumps. Why is she the only female on that cartoon.

2. I will kill myself if Dwayne Wade is dating Star Jones.

3. I had not picked up on the racism in Lion King. (weeping and choking myself)

4. Chicken Run is so underrated: Has anyone noticed this is a GREAT movie, the undertones of slavery, “let my chickens goooooo” The plight of the chickens to escape free labor, torture, and imminent death. I actually cried during this movie when the chicken got her head cut off and wept tears of joy when they escaped.

That is a great movie to teach your small children about slavery in a not so horrific way until they are old enough to take the real story.

5. Sister T: I truly missed you yesterday. Not to worry, I went to your blog and got my fill that way. I still like reading your blog AND your shenanigans in here combined.

6. DOUG is by far the most racist cartoon I have seen. Did anyone else notice that every character on that cartoon was “weird looking” except for white Doug and his white girlfriend Patty. They were orange, green, blue, yellow. No black or brown characters. Whats up with that.

My soul is troubled at work….no dwayne…no.

2 05 2008
benjie

lmao @ maya. he does look like splinter, either him or the rats from secrets of n.i.m.h.

scarlet jones is officiallt my hero! i’ve been trying to think of the name of that show for days now.

samurai jack was my fav. i sat in front of the telly like i wasn’t in college and had better, adult things to do. glued to it.

carmen sandiego was the shit! i had the game on floppy disk at school. it got me through my wee years.

2 05 2008
shine

Bill Nye the science guy was a bootleg Mr. Wizard. My middle school science teacher always made us watch that like our middle school math teacher made us watch Donald Duck in Mathland. Mad boring. (much like that damn Fantasia which I am still upset that someone wasted my entire afternoon watching as a child thinking because it was a cartoon it was good). I watched Samurai Jack because the kids I worked with were so into it. It was so slow. I felt ADHD watching it, i couldn’t understand how the anklebiters were into it.

Also I forgot about DangerMouse, Darkwing Duck, Count Duckula, and ALF. My brother gave me the DangerMouse and ALF DVDs for Christmas and my birthday. He is the best brother. I tell that to my other brother all the time.

2 05 2008
Lady

Umm.. can i just say… Hillary sure does know how to pick em.. I won’t post any links, but just as an FYI George Stephanlopolos or whatever the fuck his name is just got caught out there.. maaajor fuck up.. called the people in Indiana ‘white niggers’ … hmm..

Ok.. carry on..

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ Esquire’s #2: my husband sent me a link to an article about that. i was in my car like ‘what the french toast?’

2 05 2008
scarletjones

Stephanopolos is a jerk-off. he talked all that junk about bill after the dynasty was over and now he’s supposedly down with wifey? loser! i’m not surprised he said that shit.

2 05 2008
shine

White niggers!!!!???????

2 05 2008
Esquire

@scarlet

I think its not true. But they picked at him yesterday on ESPNS coverage of the game.

(choking on snot and tears)

2 05 2008
Esquire

I will fuck George Snuffalumpagus up.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Scarlet i loved Hey Arnold and Ren and stimpy and Rocko’s Modern Life was my favorite.. I also watched a lot of nick at nite stuff when I love lucy came on n stuff during the summer I like alvin and the chimpunks and chimpettes too.. I live rockbot chicken and courage the cowardly dog now…

2 05 2008
scarletjones

Stephanopolos is a jerk-off. he talked all that junk about bill after the dynasty was over and now he’s supposedly down with wifey? loser! i’m not surprised he said that shit.

2 05 2008
Tamara

@Esquire- my friends and I actually analyzed Doug one day and came to the following conclusions:

Doug- manic depressive
Skeeter- weed head
Patti- town whore
Roger- the town drug deal
BeBe- the rich girl, but did lines of coke
Judy- the hippie sister, but clearly we were convinced home girl did shrooms

Still loved that show though, that and Rugrats.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ Epps – i super heart rocko’s modern life. that was what spongebob is supposed to be, but it misses the mark. rocko and his stupid jerk off friends were comedy all day!

did anybody also watch the angry beavers? that was great too.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

remember boring as Johnny Q and Space ghost?

and damn Tamara came with the Gulla Gulla island I loved that show..hahah ya’ll remem reading rainbow?

2 05 2008
the quiet negress

something I noticed about those racist assed Tom & Jerry cartoons with the mammy character is that they replaced the voice. It’s almost like how they took the red bandanna off of Aunt Jemima: take away a little of the offensive shit but it still stings (and aside from the obvious, how fucked up is it that they didn’t think the rag was offensive until the late 20th century?)

and i’m just busting up in here, messing up the flow of the comments. Best childhood cartoon = Jem. Stormer & Kimber were eating each other’s box lunches and Jem’s love interests (Rio, Rory) were dumb as hell. The only difference between Jem/Jerrica Benton was a fucking star earring and some pink highlights. Idiots. I always liked The Misfits better anyway.

2 05 2008
Esquire

@ LADY

I will post it.

2 05 2008
Lady

After all that shit he tried to pull on Barack.. Karma is a big greezy bitch ain’t she..

2 05 2008
shine

damnit the sound is not working on my computer. But Wonkette has some video with Stephanopouldick and James Carville sayin something. This was back in the day when Nickelodeon was still playing salute your shorts though. I don’t know what they’re saying but its worth it just to see James Carville in a backwards baseball cap that looks tiedye
http://wonkette.com/386548/what-clintons-people-really-think-about-indiana

2 05 2008
scarletjones

and star jones needs to do something about her post-gastric “alien face” if she’s going to be a cougar and make d-wade her boo.

my mom has a friend that got gastric and she got a pretty bad case of alien face too. it’s kinda rough to finally get all the weight off only to have your face look like it’s swelling and melting all at the same time.

2 05 2008
Lady

Oh yea.. Rocko was that ish… Heifer.. now HEIFER is a perfect example of a good stupid friend… you’re right Scarlet they missed the mark on that one..

2 05 2008
Tamara

“butterfly in the skyyyyy, take a look it’s in a book….”

Mrs. Epps you know I banged with reading rainbow being the nerd that I am. I always wanted to be the kid on the show talking about the book. And reading rainbow definitely scared me for life when I saw how the made donuts one day, I can’t eat them joints to this DAY. I was get a RR flashback.

I also used to get tight when my mom was doing my hair and would see LeVar Burton on Star Trek. That ish used to blow my LIFE!!!

2 05 2008
shine

Should get back to the cartoons though. Never watched Jem, what is all this Jem. I guess I was just a big tomboy watching GI Joe, Thundercats and Transformers and stuff. I was down with She-ra though? Does that make me a girl still? I had a light up sword and everything.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

ANGRY BEAVERS!!! ohhh yesssssss ahahha I loved Doug too i liked the wild thornberrys too(dont hate ) haha

2 05 2008
shine

Reading rainbow is another theme song I know all the words too. Is there anyone out there who doesn’t remember the episode of Mr. Rogers when they went to the crayon factory? This is my test to see how old people are (and how plugged in). Everyone born in my year remembers this one episode for some reason…

2 05 2008
Tamara

Mrs. Epps can dap you up real quick? Cause Wild Thornberry’s was my ish too…

and since Rocko’s Modern life was brough up, can I bring Ren & Stimpy and how naaaaaaaaaaaaasty that show was?

But the two things I take away from that show are “happy happy joy joy,” and “everyone wants a log”

I’m sorry ya’ll, I couldn’t resist.

2 05 2008
the quiet negress

@shine

I vaguely remember that episode, but I hated the hell out of Mr. Rogers’ because that Lady Elaine Fairchild scared the shit out of me with her protuberant facial features.

And Jem. Well, I watched it again as an adult and it doesn’t stand the test of time so I would never recommend it to anyone over the age of 10–unless said person has a penchant for shitty animation, mawkish plots and dialogue, and awful music.

I also remember the Punky Brewster cartoon.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

I loved Mr. Rogers…aww poor Mr. Rogers gone **sniffles**

2 05 2008
maya

Lady –

You just had me on my super sleuth and I looked it up. George didn’t say it, but he didn’t correct him either. I can’t believe I’m about to quote Weezy, but…

“Fuck ’em good, fuck ’em long, fuck ’em hard, fuck who? Fuck ’em all.”

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@quiet negress – yeah, Jem’s friends and man were pretty stupid. i mean a wig and a star was enough to make you not realize your girl was a super hero? come on. that was lame in superman.

2 05 2008
maya

I FUCKING HATE READING RAINBOW!!!!!

That was like the most fucking remedial program to me. I hated how they did the stupid little interviews with those stupid kids who’d read the book, and then wind up telling you the whole plot, and then say “Check it out at your local library!” For what, snothead? You just told me the entire story!!!!!!!

ARGH.

2 05 2008
mrspen

i miss pepper ann.

me too!

it’s always good to revisit the cartoons. y’all have me dying thinking of muppet babies! that nanny scared me just being legs but at least she wasn’t a 400 lb black woman stuffed into slippers. ugh.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

well not a superhero but had an alter ego. whatever.

2 05 2008
Lindsay

@Tamara:

FINISH HIM!

2 05 2008
benjie

remember the recycling episode of rocko’s modern life??

i saved that on my tivo and watch it when i get sad.

and then the episode of doug when he and skeeter did the video for “bangin on a trash can”

ah the memories

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Tamara hahaha girl whyyyyy do i love that song too Happy happy joy joy.. but that show is gross thought but i didnt care i loved it.. you ever notice in that song the dude says “i’ll teach you to be happy like i taught your grandmother to suck eggs”. Now is it me and my mind just in the gutter but does he mean eggs as in balls? ahahha

hahah

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

i know what song that is maya you quoted from its on the Carter II

2 05 2008
Esquire

Whats the cartoon with the dog who has missing teeth and he always has to save that old lady. Her husband is a real asshole to the dog too.

I like that cartoon.

2 05 2008
shine

You know I bought a rainbow brite doll because it came with a DVD and it doesn’t pass the test of time either. That horse is a fucking prick asshole and those little hairy goblin thingies are slaves. Also that red-headed kid’s an ass too and why does no one listen to the black girl?

Also I forgot to mention the only other black cartoon character I remember. Hong Kong Phooey. And he was a damn janitor and as dumb as Inspector Gadget but I loved him. Also the Hair Bear Bunch because Hair Bear rocked a ‘fro. And at least he was clever.
And why did my dad tell me woody woodpecker was black too. He still insists on it to today. I always though woody was kind of a prick too, even when I was 5.

Man boomerang used to do good by me showing these cartoons but nowadays its all popeye and tom and jerry.

2 05 2008
Machete

“I had the biggest crush on Raphael. ” -ST

OMG me too! Thanks ST and others for sharing the same, thus not making me feel wierd for crushin’ on a turtle.

Had a crush on Gambit too from the old x-men cartoon (and maybe Rogue).

2 05 2008

Mister rogers gave me the creeps! those little evil wooden puppets. His freaky chester molestor sweater… I can’t

2 05 2008

Mister rogers gave me the creeps! those little evil wooden puppets. His freaky chester molestor sweater… I can’t

2 05 2008
Tamara

@Mrs. Epps: I hate you for this clip, and I have this on DVD ahahahaha!

@Benjie: “banging on a trash can… strumming on a street light…one little voice is calling me calling me…”

“Pepper ann pepper ann much too cool for 7th grade, pepper ann she’s like one in a millioooooon!”

One Saturday Morning!

cause i also liked Recess (why wasn’t recess like that in real life?).

2 05 2008

I loved duck tales and hey arnold, rocko’s modern life and also doug!

Small wonders was the shit…oh yea and punky brewster…heman and she-ra…I could go on

2 05 2008
benjie

esquire-

courage the cowardly dog.

kinda freaked me out too. the ep when that creepy dude that was rhyming like edgar allan poe. he was a freaky barber that like to shave people.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Lady Elaine looks like Joan Rivers, am I right?

Soooo, yah I saw that clip and uh, “Senator Clinton, why do you have this racist as a longtime advisor? Is it okay to be a racist as long as you calling white people niggers? What does he call blacks that don’t vote for you? Elitists?”

I’m just saying that come November if Obama is not on the ballot I am writing him in. I want my vote recorded correctly as being not for either Diapers McCain OR the Cuntons.

Bah. Now I neeeeeeed to go and watch some cartoons.

2 05 2008
maya

I’m going to hate myself for this, but…

C. Bear and Jamal, anyone? Why was Tone Loc one of the voices?

Dare I turn this into a convo about toys, too? The KENYA doll was my jawn!

Does anyone find the American Girl series particularly offensive? I have Addy, but like…how long did it take for her to appear, and then of course, she’s a slave.

2 05 2008
Esquire

OK OK since I posted it,
I will also post the link where Kantor says he didnt say “white niggers”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/05/02/clinton-adviser-claims-in_n_99810.html

2 05 2008
Tamara

@ Esquire you’re talking about Courage the dog, don’t ask me why I know…

2 05 2008
Esquire

YES COURAGE

2 05 2008

***NOT A CARTOON BUT WHO HAD A CRUSH ON….. “BRUCE” LEROY GREEN FROM THE LAST DRAGON ***

“HEY! MY MAN….WHAT IT LOOK LIKE?”

2 05 2008
shabooty

i dunno who’s hotter the pink power ranger or lexi bunny.

2 05 2008

“OMIGOD ARE YOU A REAL INDIAN?!?!?!”

SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN MELTED!

2 05 2008
benjie

damn it all….

i’m not gonna get any work done and i’m gonna get fired cause i’m hype about toons and toys.

my mother told me she would get me an american girl doll if i could keep my room clean for a month. i never got one.

tamara- did you watch the weekenders? carver decarte was my fav. even though it seemed kinda ill to make the black character the shallow, materialistic one.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

i loved C. Bear and Jamal and I had a million in one Kenya dolls

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ maya – oh shit! c bear and jamal! yessir! that was a silly ass show. but why does IMDB have ‘blacksploitation’ as one of the plot keywords?

2 05 2008
shine

OK I’m bout to roll out for awhile but I need mention the only black cartoon movie ever. And Tone Loc was in it as the voice of PeeWee.

BEBE’s Kids. I make my kids I work with watch this even though there’s a lot of cussing in it.

Man the early nineties were it. Better movies, best hip hop, cartoons. What the hell happened. How come there’s only one cartoon movie for black children??? And its full of cussin and ridiculousness.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

I always wanted the american girl doll my mom was gonna get me Addy but i wanted a Baby Born instead hahah

2 05 2008

***NOT A CARTOON, BUT WHO HAD A CRUSH ON… “BRUCE” Leroy Green from the last Dragon

“Hey! my man…what it look like?”

2 05 2008
maya

Kenya was the doll for all the flyy little girls we were culturally in tune.

AND she came with hair lotion.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Mrs. Epps, yes you are in the gutter, AGAIN. That is just some old timey saying but I don’t think it’s got jack to do with ballsucking.

Hair Bear!!! Oh man, I totally forgot about that one and it was one of the ones I liked. That Courage dog is the stuff of nightmares.

Now I’m reminded of Banana Splits hahahahaha and H.R.Puffinstuff. Someone was smoking lotsa herb back then.

2 05 2008
maya

womp @ born babies.

i just wanna know why addy had to be a slave. like, were any of the white girls holocaust survivors? no.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

I liked Weekenders too damn.. and what that show with the surrfing kids i liked that too ahah

2 05 2008

who had a crush on him:

2 05 2008

“bruce” friggin leroy green!

2 05 2008
benjie

rocket power!!

lmao.

why do i know this?

2 05 2008
Tamara

@benjie- definitely watched the weekenders, and my mom too said I could get an American Girl doll if I kept my grades right. Never got one..

But both my sisters did, lil heifers.

@Mrs. Epps- so mad you brought back Baby Born, but since you did I’m wondering if that’s why everyone back home is sporting a baby like a new gucci bag….

2 05 2008
Lolo

Awww, is Kantner being smeared? Is the clip being aired over and over and over again? Whatever must that feel like? Kick rocks ya piece a shit.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

i loved courage the cowardly dog. it was really wierd and kinda creepy sometimes but i’m into that. i remember wondering how they survived all the way out in the middle of nowhere with the family always getting jacked up by monsters and aliens.

the alien ducks were the best: “don’t tell me what to dooo-ooo-ooo-ooo!”

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahahahahha@ sporting a baby like a new gucci bag

Yea Rocket Power thats it

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

I loved All That and Kennon and Kel Show too

2 05 2008
scarletjones

and why the computer courage had was such a smart ass i don’t know?

@ Lolo – girl you know they can dish, but don’t like to take it in the tail when it comes time to receive. I don’t care what he said, he called them folks shit. anyone that let the whole “bitter” thing sway them will HAVE to take this seriously… or not because we all know how these things go sometimes.

2 05 2008
Tamara

why do i still know the entire all that theme song?

that’s a problem.

“who loves orange soda? kel loves orange soda.”

and was I the only one to see the Good Burger movie?

2 05 2008

no tamara you weren’t

“that’ll be eight bucks…ahahahahahah”

2 05 2008
maya

tam –

hell no. i saw the movie. had the soundtrack (because not only was i in love with kel, but i also was in love with immature, who were featured prominently). god, why was i such a lame?

2 05 2008

I was too in love with immature… why oh why! Romeo, Batman and the first LDB

2 05 2008
Tamara

@Maya: my dear you mean immature aka IMX which then went under cover for a couple years and reemerged as B2K?

that damn omarion and his ice box.

2 05 2008

one more :

2 05 2008
Knatural

Taimak!

2 05 2008

“HEY! MY MAN…WHAT IT LOOK LIKE?” AHAHAHAHA

2 05 2008
benjie

let’s not get started on 90’s boy groups. i could go on for days

i loved:
immature/imx
soul for real
the boys
kris kross (i was a STALKER. even now to the point that chris kelly is on my myspace friend’s list)

2 05 2008
maya

Romeo used to be so fine. Now he’s fat with a wonky eye. The size of Batman’s eye has increased exponentially over the years.

2 05 2008
maya

not “eye,” i meant to type “head”

2 05 2008
Knatural

Kris Kross, The Boys, ABC (Another Bad Creation)!!!!
Um, am I the only one who liked New Kids on the Block? *ducks under desk*

2 05 2008
benjie

@ knatural

nope. love them still to this day.
did you see that they are touring now??
i wanna go, but i don’t feel like being accosted by random, horny, white, middle aged women.

my sister had the book, the (huge ass) buttons, the sleeping bag…everything

2 05 2008

OMG ABC??!!!???!?!?!? Please don’t get me started, I had the tape…DON’T PLAY!

2 05 2008
Knatural

The tape? Like cassette tape AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH. Remember recording songs directly from the radio on cassettes, or was it just me?
Trying to time when exactly you should press PAUSE so you don’t get any commercials/too much talking.

2 05 2008

yesssssssssss knatural.

Remember you had to put like tissue or tape over the holes on the top of the tape to record? ahahahahahahahahaha

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

OMg yall crazyyyy I saw that damn good burger movie of course ahhahah immature SMH damn i loved them..Kris Kross OMG hahaha at home i would wear my pants backwards and jump on the bed listenign to that song hahahah too funny. ABC?? omg no comment.. New Kids ont he block eh…not so much a fan Soul for real was da shit

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Knat-The tape? Like cassette tape AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH. Remember recording songs directly from the radio on cassettes, or was it just me?
Trying to time when exactly you should press PAUSE so you don’t get any commercials/too much talking.

OMG YESSSSSSSSSSSssssssssssssssss

2 05 2008
Lolo

You kids and your newtimey boy bands. I don’t care, I still got my Jackson 5 and my kids know ALL the words! “It’s easy as onetwothree, simple as doremi, nyah nyah nyah”

You know, I am DONE with the Dems and their backstabbing racist backroom bullSHIT. Come November I will be voting but if I have to I will write in Obama on that ballot so that they count my vote as one they lost by pandering to the fucking windowlickers and their mouthbreathing fucking racist CORE. I have not come this far and worked this hard so as to stay home and pout, so fuck that lazy noise. Time to call the pussies out with their handwringing “oooooooh, the racists won’t vote for Obaaaama so we just gonna shuffle and cringe before we do our JOB”.
http://www.colorofchange.org/cgi-bin/py/dems-petition.py

I would rather all of us be officially counted and recorded as the votes they can not count on any longer. Shit, this pisses me way OFF and makes me wish that the biggest irritation in life was that Somali Queef.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

i still love Jackson 5 too Lolo

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

maya (16:47:29) :
i just wanna know why addy had to be a slave. like, were any of the white girls holocaust survivors? no.

AAAHHH! So, so true! That said, I definitely still had one! Interestingly enough, as a teen/adult, I have always met little White girls who want Addy dolls. Usually, I chalk that sort of thing under the heading of “children’s obsession with otherness”. But I actually suspect that these little girls want a slave baby doll to clean up after Kirsten and them other Aryan hoes.

@ Benjie- http://thebeautifulstruggler.blogspot.com/2006/11/worlds-oldest-webpage.html

2 05 2008
Tamara

@Lolo – dead @ “somali queef”

you’re dead wrong lmao!

why when i was home over spring break I found some of my old tapes that i had made back in the day, i also found my Aiwa walkman and was so hype. I used to make my little tapes and listen to them on my walkman.

And I used to get so heated when the Dj’s would talk over the end of the songs, they were fucking up my flow son.

2 05 2008
Knatural

Who doesn’t love the Jackson 5! The Christmas Album! No words. Every ‘generation’ has their boy-bands.
@ Né, I’m about to friend you on MySpace (I know, very gey). Your friends look real hood.
Does anyone else cringe at the notion that kids born in 1990 can vote come November?

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Hey Tamara I knwo that girl Jaye Addy we went to high school together

2 05 2008

I am still a Michael Jackson fan to the fullest. I still get excited when “PYT” or “Don’t stop until you get enough” comes on the radio.
Remeber the movie Moonwalker?

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

My PYT is my favorite MJ song hands down besides thriller, man in the mirror,bad, beat it, billie fucking white ass jean and everythign else he ever came out with 🙂

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

OMG! Do y’all ever subconciously palm your breasts in public? I have always had a tendency to rest my hand on my neck or chest, and I am sitting here not even realzing that I am holding my boob and this visitor was walking by! HELP! I look terrible now! Damn, damn, DAMN!

Well, we have effectively run all of the menfolk outta this piece today.

2 05 2008
Knatural

*nearly pees on herself*
Moonwalker was my shit. Remember when his shadow morphed into a car! And when he was, as I would say as a child, ‘A Claymation’? I miss that movie; I wish I had a VCR to play it in.

2 05 2008

Mj is the man. He just has a fucked mentality.
Omg! why did thriller scare the bejesus out of me when I was 3.

2 05 2008
Tamara

LOL Mrs. Epps, she’s definitely my LS and my roommate.

*sings* “it’s a small world after all….”

2 05 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

First off, I gotta say that since I found this blog a little while, I have been reading EVERY SINGLE DAY…I *heart* Chris and his brutally insightful, witty observations about the f*ckery that is 21st century life!

Anywhoo, I’m 31, and I KNOW full well I watched most, if not all of those racist azz Looney Tunes/Tom and Jerry cartoons as a little girl in the 80s. I mean, they had those joints on constant rotation…I was guaranteed to see one at least every week, if not more often. I really didn’t catch on to the racism until I was about 10 or so…and I remember getting uber pissed. That led to my whole militant phase where I realized that um, I was (a) not like my white friends and (b) they needed to know that Looney Tunes, Tom and Jerry, et al. were hella racist.
All I got were *blank* stares for my trouble.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Man, I love these 18 year olds this year. Our local high school’s government teacher told his senior class that if they “happened” to miss school on the day of the primary in order to Get Out The Vote, well ….. hahahaha. I had two girls running out in the boonies and knocking on doors and just putting some of that energy to work so that I could give me old feet a break. Too sweet.

Okay, I’m really not coming up with any boy bands that ever made me as happy as J5. Hmmm, nope. I think I might have officially lost it back when it was Menudo! time.

2 05 2008

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSsssssssssssSSSSSS Knatural! I want to look for it on amazon.

Lmao @ ST. I can’t say that I randomly hold my twins…lolololol

2 05 2008
Tamara

@KNatural- why was i watching the “smooth criminal” part from moonwalker the other day?

i will forever love that movie, they need to re-release it on dvd

2 05 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

“Knatural said:

Kris Kross, The Boys, ABC (Another Bad Creation)!!!!
Um, am I the only one who liked New Kids on the Block? *ducks under desk*”

No, hon, you’re not…I know I was highly ANTI NKTB in public but secretly, I loved me some Jordan Knight! I remember hearing “Please Don’t Go Girl” for the first time and practicing slow dancing to it in my room…I must have been in sixth grade at the time and we had school dances like every month.

On boy bands…I never really got into them much except for NE, NKOTB, and the J5…I was more into the solo artists myself. I was in LOVE with Al B. Sure for a minute…

2 05 2008

Hi five to the other pisces in the house btw

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-OMG! Do y’all ever subconciously palm your breasts in public? I have always had a tendency to rest my hand on my neck or chest, and I am sitting here not even realzing that I am holding my boob and this visitor was walking by! HELP! I look terrible now! Damn, damn, DAMN!

Well, we have effectively run all of the menfolk outta this piece today.

I have been known to do that too..or hold my arm up like i was holding a purse but i wasnt carrying one…

2 05 2008
SOMALI QUEEN

Lolo,

kindly, get off my tits. Don’t carry stuff to new posts—- your becoming like a dog to a bone over ‘words on a damn screen’.

Get over yourself and your damn insecurities girl.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

<< still has the moonwalker movie

2 05 2008

Ok knatural Add me. You can see my friends (on myspace)?

2 05 2008

I am jealous…let me dubb it Mrs. epps…lol

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

I interviewed Al B. Sure!’s* son for my friend’s blog the other day and he was such a sweetie pie. I was excited to be that close (mind you, through the phone) to Al B! Senior. Fans of his should be excited, he has some cool stuff coming up, as does his son.

My heart was with Christopher Williams, Hakim from the Boys, the dude who was too old to be in ABC, both Kriss Kross’s Chrises, etc. I, too, was a “Block Head”- Jonathan was my boo.

Then Digable Planets came out and all I wanted to do was listen to them and the Native Tounges. But I have always been the QUEEN of New Jack Swing. Oy, don’t even get me started.

*-Please say the exclimation point.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

LOL- I dunno if it still plays actually..i guess I should see ahhaha I’ll fedex it to you ahhaha 🙂 I gotta find it 1st.

2 05 2008
Esquire

Moonwalker WAS a good movie.

2 05 2008

::licks lips:: @ the thought of (late 1980’s) Al B. Sure!

2 05 2008
Esquire

Why is Al B. Sure’s son NOT cute. (and he cant sing)

2 05 2008
iloveblackpeople

Sooooo, I know some people might be mad at this but all I can say is that Larry done came a loooonnng way baby!

2 05 2008
Knatural

@ Né – just your pictures. Friend me since you security settings are high (click name).
It was so funny how ABC and Kriss Kross used to beef so hard!
Who loves ‘Beetlejuice’?

2 05 2008
Knatural

CRAP sorry wrong link 😦
click name now

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice!!!! classic and I have that movie too

2 05 2008
Mr. Smith

I’m surprised Looney Tunes got by this far without Chris’ criticism. They constantly made fun of black people, the ones made during WWII were almost as bad, on the other hand they were only making fun of Mussolini, Hitler and Tojo. The only ONLY thing funny abut that video Chris put up, was the fact that the BEGINNING of the race, there were a bunch of little white race cars, but one HUGE LONG BLACK car (no homo).

My list of favorite shows when I was young is too long, seeing as I had shows I learned from, real people shows, cartoons, which bring me to one last note…

WHY THE FUCK IS COOKIE MONSTER NOT ALLOWED TO EAT COOKIES ANYMORE!!!!!>?!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!?

2 05 2008
iloveblackpeople

If this posts twice sorry…

Back to the coonery…Larry Fishburne sure has come a long way!!!

2 05 2008
maya

@ ST –

I catch myself feeling my little boobies all the time. I wondered if it was just me, but something about it is just so comforting. *sigh* DIGABLE PLANETS!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pvKzLXx3zY

“If it’s the shit, well lift it off the plastic
The babes’ll go spastic
Hip hop needs a classic!!!”

@ Tam –

Not the Aiwa, son!!! I had that joint, too. I’m really age myself, though, and tell yall I used to listen to the VINYL of Thriller on my Fisher Price “My First Record Player.”

2 05 2008
letinstar

i can’t bring myself to watch tom and jerry…i did grow up on looney tunes and my favorite was foghorn leghorn and daffy, although daffy needed meds…since i grew up in the 70’s, i was more into the kroffts supershows…that was good psychedelic fun for us kids…

*note the one in purple is wearing a pimp outfit…

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

had to do it…ahhhh** jammin hard right now**

2 05 2008
Lolo

@Somali Queef

Are you funny yet? Cuz when you are then maybe I’ll mind your rules. Not really but hey, there’s always hooooooope la la lala.

I tried to make a case once for De La Soul being a boyband but got completely shot down. I still don’t care cuz they make me as happy as a good boy band should.

2 05 2008
maya

Um…I don’t know if they’re a boy band, but Q-Tip could get the business.

2 05 2008
benjie

ST-

i just came back from lunch and saw the link you posted.

we are *tear* kindred spirits.
i STILL have my original copy of DA BOMB in mint condition. and listen to it from time to time.

remember the episode of different world when they were on it starring as troubled teens? then at the end they gave dwayne the lidless jar and dubbed him OT: original teacher.

lmao.

2 05 2008
Muse

OMG my brain hurts right now. Warner Brothers have managed to bastardize cartoons now. The apocalypse is here. No wonder kids are tripping the hell out and shooting at folks and blowing up schoosl. They have these extremely stupid ass cartoons that are gassing their impressionable brains to do really horrific shit. Oh and now they have to have a little bunny slut in the show that probably gets gang banged by the other males on her team. I hope we now understand why kids are growing up to be evil, slutty, and dangerous.

2 05 2008
letinstar

oooh and another cartoon i dug back in the day was “the mighty heroes”…especially diaperman…and i worked at a place where one of my co workers looked like diaperman…that is all…

2 05 2008

OMG KNATURAL!!!! i LOVE YOUR WORK.

I am currently studying michelanglo and leonardo di vinci’s technique’s and also anchient fresco art technique’s.

lol my friends aren’ t hood they are actually very educated, you would not be able to tell by our silly pictures though.

2 05 2008
Muse

What happened with the good days when cartoons were normal? I feel bad for kids because now they are surrounded by stupidity. They are getting all these subliminal messages to act like total degenerates. Cartoons aren’t even safe anymore. At least for the kids in the 80’s the most risqué cartoons were probably the Simpson’s or Ren and Stippy. LIke I said previous now cartoons are featuring little bunny whores for kids to emulate.

2 05 2008
PrettyPiscesGirl

“I tried to make a case once for De La Soul being a boyband but got completely shot down. I still don’t care cuz they make me as happy as a good boy band should.”

De La Soul…ah the memories…Native Tongues was my obsession for a hot minute!

2 05 2008
Knatural

Benjie! Why’d you bring up A Different World? Why can’t Our shows be like that again *sigh*
I remember that episode! Remember when The Boys were on there, too.
Thanks @ Né. I know yall were just out having fun. Trust me, I can’t judge *goes to un-tag photos on Facebook*.
@Muse, entertainment for children has never been normal, i.e. Brothers Grimm fairy tales, toy guns (which is an oxymoron), that game Operation (how morbid). Ren & Stimpy was my shit, too.

2 05 2008

I loved ren and stimpy. They were too much!

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Esquire!!!! He is cute, and he CAN sing! He sang for me! I feel like I have to defend him now, and always, LOL! And he is such a nice kid.

Don’t be cruel. Cause he would never be that way to you. Ah no no no-oh.

Fave MJ songs: “Lady In My Life”, “Off The Wall”, “In The Closet”, “I Can’t Help It” and pretty much everything else.

2 05 2008
benjie

ah DIfferent World.

i was an avid watcher of that show until the very end (it got kinda stupid, but all shows do so…)

remember the ep when tupac played jada’s old boyfriend piccolo?
that right there cemented my love for him.

(sidebar: i feel the need to mention that my tupac love was also set in stone by my recent viewing of Juice. …yes i know i’m late. yes i know the movie is hella old. please don’t revoke my black girl membership card)

2 05 2008
Muse

The X-Men cartoons in the 90s were awesome. That got me hooked on the comics. At least if the writers and creators want to discuss mature subjects they can at least make it realstic with a good plot. That Loonatics crap is BS and we are all probably losing IQ points by discussing it LOL.

2 05 2008
maya

So if we’re talking about A Different World, I guess now is as good a time as any to confess my love for D’Wayne Wayne?

“LADY OF MY LIFE” is an INCREDIBLE MJ song.
Other favorites include:
Dirty Diana
Off the Wall
Heaven Can Wait

2 05 2008
Lolo

Good grief, comic books. I have so much love and conflict over my love for comic books. The comic that I have the most love for these days is The Immortal Iron Fist, a written by Matt Fraction but I have huge love for Jeremy Love’s work too. He’s doing an incredible online comic called Bayou (zombies, runaway slaves, just it’s incredible is all).

I’m so pumped to go see Iron Man that I feel kinda stupid but whatevah.

2 05 2008
maya

I also blame Jada Pinkett’s character in Different Wall for teaching me you can be both SMALL and LOUD simultaneously. “Lena” my fav.

How fab was Diahnn Carol in her portrayal as Whitley’s mom? And why do I love Patti LaBelle for repeatedly calling that boy “Chipmunk.”

2 05 2008
maya

I also blame that show and the TLC video for “Baby Baby Baby” for making me thinking college was going to be a lot more fun than it actually was.

2 05 2008
Knatural

Best MJ songs:
Lady In My Life
Liberian Girl
Beat It
Human Nature
Rock With You
Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’

Re: X-Men, I was PISSED when they cast Halle Berry as Storm because my reference was early 90s Fox Saturday Mornings X-Men the Animated Series Storm. She had that British-ish accent, tall and long, cool, white hair. And Storm is Somali – why not cast Iman, was she too old?

2 05 2008
Muse

Um Storm is actually from Kenya. Her mother was from a Kenyan tribe and her father was an African American photographer. They both died in a plane crash which is why Storm is claustrophobic.

WOW I’m a nerd.

2 05 2008
Muse

BTW Halle Berry was a terrible choice for Storm. I would have gone with an unknown actress who has east african features. Iman probably can’t act even though she is beautiful.

2 05 2008
maya

When Mike got acquitted, they did a Michael Jackson mega mix on the radio. It was the HYPEST THING EVER. I never realized how many of his songs I loved until they put them back to back. “Remember the Time” is also a favorite…I felt like in that video, mike was sstarting to accept that he was black. They coulda did without him kissing Iman cause it made me nervous.

Yes, see? I forgot about Wanna Be Startin Somethin
Don’t Stop Til U Get Enough should also be on my list because when they play thatin the club I get way too excited and clear space for myself on the floor…

2 05 2008
Lolo

Haaaaaaaaaaa @Muse

Baited!!

Okay, now tell us the secret origins of Doctah Doooom, pleeze thx k.

2 05 2008
Knatural

Muse, yes you are a nerd, but I appreciate the correction. 🙂 When it comes to comics, ya better come correct. I was mad that the movies didn’t have Gambit. Oh well. I loved his Cajun accent.
@ Maya, that MJ-Iman kiss made me nervous, too. I wonder how many takes they had to do. Iman can act, somewhat. She was in the Star Trek movie (nerd) where she played a shape-shifting alien.

2 05 2008
Knatural

Doctor Doom and the Fantastic Four = gey. I hate them.

2 05 2008

Ya’ll remeber when mikE was fine. He had a BEAUTIFUL SMILE!

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

maya (18:57:31) :

I also blame that show and the TLC video for “Baby Baby Baby” for making me thinking college was going to be a lot more fun than it actually was.

YES! When I found out there was no Hillman, I wasn’t so sure about even going to college anymore. Then I found out about Howard. Then I got there and saw that things had changed a loooot since the 1990s. It was still cool, but it wasn’t Hillman dammit!

Chris-where the boys at?

2 05 2008

I loved the way whitley said dwayne.

“Five MEENUTES DWYANE…FIVE meenutes!” hahahahahaha

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Muse-Um Storm is actually from Kenya. Her mother was from a Kenyan tribe and her father was an African American photographer. They both died in a plane crash which is why Storm is claustrophobic.

WOW I’m a nerd.

indeed you are….and its ok that you admit it 🙂 I think we all have a little nerd in them

2 05 2008

btw I loved tupac too benjie..hehe!

2 05 2008
Lolo

Yah, I have no love for either DD or FF but I still get a good laugh out of the frenzy over Green Lantern.

I have several longboxes stashed away that contain waaay too much proof of my nerding ways. These days I keep it down to the Flight anthologies, IIF but now that Fraction’s off the writing of that I’ll probably pick up his Punisher series.

2 05 2008
Esquire

Sister,

I may have been too quick to judge seeing as I only saw him sing one time on that stupid mtv show as I was flipping. He was singing night and day, which is a song very near to my heat so maybe I was being too harsh?

I may have caught a bad nite. But Al. B will forever be my lightskinned crush. He is chunky now, and STILL sexy.

Muse you ARE a nerd. But nerds make all the money. Thanks for that random fact about Storm. I thot it was cool.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahah ya’ll a bunch of nerdsss Star Trek was the ish….dont hate on me when i say this but i was an x-files fan and Alley Mcbeal fan as well and Buffy too hahahah

2 05 2008
Muse

God yeah I’m an x-men junkie. I have every xmen comic from 1963 through probably 2002 when I stopped collecting. hey there is monetary value to old comics. My pops use to collect comics and when I became a serious collector he gave me all of his old comics which were in near mint condition. I even have Spider man #1.

Knatural: My favorite character was Gambit as well but Marvel really screwed him over with his angst-filled relationship he had with Rogue.

OMG someone quick give me a blunt and some alize so I can be cool again LOL. I’m exposed.

2 05 2008
Muse

Dude you aren’t truly a nerd unless you watch Battlestar Galactica..Best show ever…The reimaged series on Sci-Fi is awesome and does the original justice.

Someone pass the cheese!

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Thank you Esquire, lol! I will post a link to the interview when it goes up, cause there should be a video with it of him singing at his full potential. He also addresses the song in the interview. I actually thought he did a good job with it, but I am damn partial to that family. 🙂

Mrs Epps- Gurl, bye! I loved Ally McBeal! I like/relate to neurotic women and I have had a decade long girl crush on Lisa Nicole Carson, her pretty Black roommate! I knew I hated Taye Diggs when he came on that show! He reeked of bitchassedness.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-Taye Diggs when he came on that show! He reeked of bitchassedness.

AMEN!

2 05 2008
Esquire

Am I wrong for thinking that the man who came up with NoBitchassness…reeks of Bitchassness?

And Kim Porter reeks of STUPIDassness…did anyone see her plethora of dimwitted interviews in Essence? I will never get those 15 minutes of my life back I wasted on her.

2 05 2008

omg kim porter is pathetic!

She barely knew diddy and al b sure before she pushed out babies for them.
Freakin’ groupie!

2 05 2008
zoso

@ Muse
Battlestar Galactica’s good but so is Stargate! I’ma miss that show. I also liked Farscape and Serenity. Those were the jam, especially Farscape.

2 05 2008
Christina

Someone mentioned My Brother and Me. See what the older brother Alfie looks like now:

Here is the rest of the cast:

3 05 2008
ph2072

I HATE the new cartoon version of the Looney Tunes. Bring the old ones back dammit. The first time I saw them it freaked me the fuck out. They look like robots on a combination of steroids, creatine, and crack.

“……Recognizing the fact that our children are indeed dumber than ever and have no idea what the word ‘wily’ means (or the ability to associate ‘wile’ as a pun on ‘wild’), the creators apparently made Wyle E. Coyote take a fucking MCSE exam and become Tech E. Coyote – the cheesiness of which is borderline criminal, but nonetheless simple enough for our stupid ass uncultured electronically-obsessed fatass children to comprehend.”

^^^^^^^^^
I can always look forward to a laugh anytime I read your blog. Fucking hilarious!

3 05 2008
scarletjones

@ ST – girl i love you soo much…. but yo boy lil’ b sure is wack on the vocals! myself and hubby watched his complete stint on Rock the Cradle and although we were rooting for him to get it together, he shamed his daddy with that rendition of night and day… AND he shamed maxwell with his rendition of woman’s work.

i love al b and i was sad to see lil b’ go home but it was for sure a justified ousting. maybe he needs to just make more of an effort to perform better.

3 05 2008
Lolo

Farscape, very fun. Serenity, almost as much. These days it’s Doctor Who for me.

3 05 2008
Michael
3 05 2008
Michael

Er, I meant this

3 05 2008
london

wish my company firewall would allow me to do this at work..
hong kong phuey was the nuts.. the tune is in my head as i type
ulysses 51…
he-man…
thundercats..
daffy duck is still the shit to this day… cannot cope with those morphed looney tunes above – gen xers with too much time on their hands
scooby doo… (scrappy can fuck the hell off.. i hate that puppy power shit..)
powerpuff girls..& i flat lined in the cinema.. kids staring at me wondering why i was gasping for air.. one of the cleverest & funniest cartoon movies ever made…
johnny bravo..
ed, edd and eddy…
family guy…
i am ashamed to say i ended up liking spongebob… when ‘knightrider’ turned up in the movie *dead*.. inspired…

3 05 2008
rg

that bird with teeth comment killed me..KILLED ME

3 05 2008
Angry v3.2b

I was always a fan of Thundercats, G-Force, The Centurions, GI Joe, Ghostbusters among others…

4 05 2008
anjiebaby

Doug
Powerpuff Girls – the one where the bad guy turns one of their ponytails into a chicken wing is classic. She wiles the f*ck out.
Johnny Bravo- “Whoa, momma!”
Ren & Stimpy- “Space Madness” episode is classic
Two Stupid Dogs
Courage the Cowardly Dog
Tale Spin
Rocko’s Modern Life – I got pissed when they changed the theme song halfway through the series. Heifer is the epitome of a stupid friend. Oh, and the neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Bighead. CLASSIC!

Crushworthy: Raphael (TMNT) and Dwayne Wayne (I blame his character for my affinity towards dating nerds/math geeks), Batman (Immature)

The Backyardigans are the shyt, hands down. Anyone watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force?? The Mooninites are hilarious.

4 05 2008
zoso

I never could get into Aqua Teen Hunger Force. I tried but to no avail.
Samurai Jack
Afro Samurai
Animaniacs
Looney Tunes: Marvin the Martian & Montana Max (& Babs singing Aretha…)
Courage the Cowardly Dog
Proud Family
Hong Kong Phooey
David the Gnome
Ducktales
Mighty Mouse
Rescue Rangers
Fat Albert
Jetsons
Tailspin
Rescue Rangers
Daria

4 05 2008
imaG

good post man lol a diff look

http://www.anythingblack.net <<< kanye glow in the dark review

4 05 2008
4 05 2008
Angry v3.2b

Oh yeah let me now forget Aqua Teen Hunger Force – the episodes with the Mooninites? Classic.

I never liked how Skeeter Valentine in Doug was always beatboxing….stereotypical, yeah. Racist? You be the judge.

4 05 2008
Angry v3.2b

Let me not*. Still half asleep, damn.

4 05 2008
Shine

Damn Daria, I forgot about that! I loved Daria. BTW I love Adult Swim now.
First with Space Ghost Coast to Coast but I loved Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law (and all the Daily Show crossovers) and still love the Venture Bros (stupid Johnny Quest). I like some ATHF but never got too into it. Same with Robot chicken.

And although I find the Boondocks funny, I’m sorely disappointed in the fact that women are just shit in that show. My crush on Aaron McGruder died by season 2. Anyone notice that the only females that show up in that show are 1. Hos 2. Fat black mammys that got too much attitude and are always eating chicken and making quips before getting shoved offscreen. 3. white women. 4. Stupid Jasmine. Not to say the men are shining examples of non-coonery (except Huey). I get the satire for them but the way women show up is not satire. Its just old school buffoonery because they don’t have any storylines. I guess Aaron McGruder doesn’t know any women. Not enough black chicks to watch Star Wars with him.

4 05 2008
zoso

“Not enough black chicks to watch Star Wars with him.” – Ha.
I like Boondocks but never remember when it’s on and when I have seen there were virtually no females.

I had my “Daria phase” back in the day.

4 05 2008
Laurel

@John. Interesting article. I spent some time in the DR and I’ll never, ever go back there — for the very reasons mentioned in the article. Those people are seriously screwed up mentally. I felt more comfortable around the European tourists — and that’s saying a lot.

4 05 2008
madd scientista

is that what our beloved Bugs has turned into?

*cries*

5 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Shine- EXCELLENT point on The Boondocks! I know that there was a cute little Afro wearing girl in the early strips (or was it a headwrap?), but she never made the transition to the major papers nor the show. McGruder also did a comic novel with former friend-turned-BET exec Reginald Hudlin called “Birth of a Nation”, in which most of the black women were gross charactures, but the heroine was a militant, green-eyed biracial woman. Things that make you go “I’m not surprised.”

5 05 2008
goose

http://games.yahoo.com/free-games/missionaries-and-cannibals

This might be the most ridiculous game I have EVER seen.

5 05 2008
Nice

Sister Toldja, Have you ever heard of the 1915 movie “Birth of A Nation” that glorified the KKK and White Supremacy? The movie also caused riots when it was first released?

5 05 2008
NotBlonde

Aaron McGruder might not write women into his comics or cartoon because *wait for it* he’s a man. And probably a very straight man who doesn’t get how to write a woman properly. Jasmine is adorable to me but even she only shows up in the cartoon every now and then. McGruder is a dude so it’s expected that he’d write a lot of male characters in his comics. How many male characters do you see in Cathy?

5 05 2008
Shine

Yea, I’ve heard of the movie (its studied because it was the most technically advanced movie at the time. Also racist bastard Klansman glorifying piece of shit. Anybody who was anybody in the Harlem Renaissance was known for protesting against it but it was the 20s and nonviolent protest didn’t change shit) and I have the book. I noticed it then which is why I got over Aaron McGruder. The book was interesting and since it was supposed to be a movie I thought it was good but then I’m glad it wasn’t a movie because it was the same old shit again. Like racism and stereotypes only affect black men and because you’re black you can promote negative and hurtful stereotypes about black women. I mean this mammy and light-skinned, light-eyed nonsense has been going on long enough.
@NotBlonde, its not the lack of female characters that is the problem. He’s a dude I understand but 1) that has not stopped a lot of people from including female characters. Its not impossible or that damn difficult. 2)Its that when women do show up on the boondocks they are always negative shallow stereotypes. The type that if a white person had displayed women (black women) like this would’ve led to protests. and 3) Cathy sucks all kinds of ass and you know it. Plus Cathy comes right out and says that its about women like the Lifetime channel. Aaron McGruder does not and did not make that statement. He talks more generally. Plus Cathy does have a dude in it all the time, that Irving character. In fact those are like the only 2 characters in that cartoon. But this is now way too much time to spend on Cathy, what a worthless waste of ink.

11 05 2008
loverfighter

And the hits keep on rolling:

First, teaser alert. If you are not one of the millions, or billions, of people that have already seen Iron Man, you might not want to read this.

I was looking forward to watching Iron Man, just as I used to look forward to a good episode of Looney Tunes. I’m thinking: sweet special effects and a proper summer blockbuster. Both are true, but then I was bitchslapped back into the racist reality I live in.

I had three problems with that garbage. So first, who are going to be the villians? (How rhetorical is that question!). Sure, some one has to be the villain, and who better than the already vilified Muslims you say. Derka derka ahmed jihad… Lets not forget that we are living in this movie world where a silver-spooned, war-mongering, womanizing DB grows a conscience and wants to save the world. So they could have just as easily come up with a superhero villain, rather then meshing the comic world with the “real” world.

Second, the Muslims weren’t even important enough to be the main villain. This ties in with the third. They were too stupid to realize that ol’ dude is building a giant robot, as opposed to the stupid Jericho missile he was supposed to build. Not only do Muslims live in caves, they’re too thick to uncover an obvious plan going on under the watch of their cameras. I’m surprised they didn’t show the Muslims riding out on camels to chase the mofo down…

Alright, so here’s what I imagine the public saw. “Damn those Muslims, stealing our weapons and using them against us.” Yes, how dare they want weapons; only responsible people like Americans can have and use them. The other thing I imagine they saw, “Frick you mean its not just those guys that speak Arabic, but they speak Urdu and Farsi and Bosnian and Albanian and and and anyone of the 18 languages they said in the movie. I can’t just limit myself to those towelheads, the next sleeper cell could be anyone.” And the Patriot Act gains more support. Fear and control, sounds like a story I’ve heard before.*

(*Before you over react, I’ve read the disclaimer. I’m pointing out some shit I saw, I’m pissed, and all jokes have some truth in them.)

11 06 2008
Merri Lee

FUCK THIS!!!! All the good cartoons are being ruined.

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