Fat People

29 04 2008

I arrived at work today unusually pissed off. I spent about 20 minutes on the Metro trying to work on a Flash website while some idiot 3 seats behind me was listening to stupid fucking Lil’ Wayne so loud I could actually feel myself getting dumber.

Upon escaping the train, I hop on the goddamn bus. Some fat fuck forklifts herself onto the bus too, nearly flipping the goddamn thing over. The next part of this story I am not exaggerating in the least: the INSTANT the bus pulls off, this gravitron yanks the stop-request cord. The bus comes to a halt at the next stop less than 200 yards from her point of entry, and she lumbers off the bus as the vehicle’s suspension heaves a sigh of relief. As the bus pulls off, I watch in utter disbelief as she appears to be walking into a convenience store. This chick is so fat she actually defies the laws of optics and appears to get BIGGER as I get farther away from her. I turn to see the expressions on the faces of everyone else. I see a combination of rage and amusement.

Figure 1: Fat chick asking the driver to stop the bus

Fat people piss me off because of a.) the sheer number of them in this country and b.) how little they do to keep from getting fat. Fat people clog up the doors on buses and subways. Fat people sit in restaurants for hours at a time, forcing other people to wait forever to get a seat. Fat people sweat all over EVERYTHING! The sweat makes them smell absolutely atrocious. Fat people jack up the cost of health care like it’s their fucking job. It takes 100 acres of cotton to make just ONE T-SHIRT for a 350lb man. They breathe too hard. They eat too much. They refuse to walk anywhere. They get elected to congress. It’s fucking disgusting, and it has to be stopped.

I went completely fucking apeshit on Europe a few posts back, but there’s one thing they definitely have (at least in Spain and Portugal) that I’d be willing to go back for over and over again: a nearly total absence of fat people.

Figure 2: Goddammit

In Spain, you had to fucking walk EVERYWHERE, lest you wind up blowing half your salary on gasoline (which is INSANELY EXPENSIVE in Europe), cab rides, or expensive public transit. You have to WALK to work. You have to WALK to wherever you get lunch, and then WALK back to work. Then you WALK back home for the ‘siesta’ or whatever the fuck it is over there. Then you WALK back to work again. Then you WALK from work to the market to get your food. Then you WALK the fuck home and cook your food. Then you WALK to wherever the hell it is you hang out with your buddies in your fruity horizontally-striped shirt, superskinny jeans and faux-hawk hairdo to talk in your fruity Euro-speak about how much you hate America despite the fact that your economy rides the waves we produce, and how cool it is that you feign a 150 fucking Euro club cover charge to anyone that even remotely resembles an American.

Figure 3: Average European male. Note the lack of fatness.

But no matter how much Europeans suck, they have this over us: they walk more, eat less, and do less sitting around, leading to a blissful absence of fatassitude. No fat people stinking up the elevators. No fat people taking up an extra 60 seconds on your bus commute. No fat people sweating on your home inspection checklist (can you tell this happened to me? CAN YA?). No fat people eating philly cheesesteaks with a DIET FUCKING GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKING COKE BECAUSE THEY’RE “WATCHING THEIR CALORIES!!!” Drop the soda and pick of a big ol’ can of lipolysis, you ginormous fucking gastropod!

Figure 4: You can have a Fanta, or the Fantanas. You cannot have both. Choose wisely, you fat bastard.

Raise gas prices, goddammit. $9 a gallon for all I give a shit. Make these fat motherfuckers walk, or at least roll end over end wherever the fuck it is they have to go. Too fat to walk? MELT ‘EM. FUCKING MELT THEM! Melt them before the very eyes of the living fatties that they might behold the awful price of diet soda and a sedentary lifestyle. Melt them down, mix their remains with ethanol, and let everyone see me drive off in the first fatty/ethanol hybrid monster truck, which I will happily use to bulldoze every fast food restaurant in the country*

Figure 5: Stay Puft Fleshmallow Boy

*Except Popeyes. But you have to take a BMI test before being allowed in. Fail the BMI test, and you will be melted.

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467 responses

29 04 2008
dynamicdiva

OMG!! Thanks for this!! I can’t stand fat ass kids. What I especially hate about the obese is the ones who get a disability check for it.

29 04 2008
dynamicdiva

Melt them?! Priceless!

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

OMFG THAT FIRST PICTURE!!!!!!!!! LMFAO SIDUGHW(*&FUIWDJFNWOef
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29 04 2008
stuffgirlslike

Chris You have done it now, you have upset half your readership, you are brave to even think about writing against fat people. Write against fat but please let the people go easy, it is hard enough having to deal with ridicule off line.

I am losing weight myself and chris I understand you were a fat child.

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

“Chris You have done it now, you have upset half your readership, you are brave to even think about writing against fat people.”-stuffgirlslike
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA….HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I’ve been waiting for this post. They breathe too hard. How is it possible to snore while wide awake? The human female body should never be over 300lbs. Sorry.

29 04 2008
Roger

Ooooh, you done gone and done it now! You KNOW people will be telling you that you need to understand that some people have a “genetic predisposition” to being fat as fuck. I’ve got a friend who lost 150lbs and she tells me how sick she is of her stupid coworkers asking shit like, “How did you do it?” or “C’mon, you can have ONE doughnut, can’t you?” or “I couldn’t do what you did!” My sister also lost about 50lbs and she has gotten tired of her friends saying the same stupid shit (and also hating! Can you believe it?).

People really ought to read about what the fuck soda does to a person–I used to down Pepsi like a chainsmoker goes through Marlboros–I gave that shit up in January and dropped 4lbs in about a month. And fast food? Man, that shit is…well, shit!

29 04 2008
29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“…and chris I understand you were a fat child.”

What?

29 04 2008
benjie

i’ve been telling people for years that when the fat sweat, they sweat butter.

no one listens.

in all honesty, alot of people can stand to lose a few lbs (me included). but its the morbidly obese that need help. have you ever watched the first episode of the biggest loser? every season you have thousands upon thousands of people who have walked/stood upright the longest in their entire lives, just to be in that line, just to get on that show. its a shame.

and, i threw up in my mouth a lil bit with that last pic. something about obese children.
*shudders*

29 04 2008
madd scientist

“This chick is so fat she actually defies the laws of optics and appears to get BIGGER as I get farther away from her.”

*dead*

29 04 2008
creativecat

It should be illegal to make thongs/spandex/halters/etc in fatass sizes.

29 04 2008
Roger

Oh, and another thing you should’ve said about fat people, Chris:

They are FOREVER hating on skinny people. Example: Mo’Nique. Now, I ain’t got a problem with big-boned people, but come the fuck on Mo’Nique. She didn’t get that big by exercise–she got that way by diet and lack of exercise. At first, I found her “skinny bitches are evil” schtick funny…until I realized that was ALL she could yap about, and then I was all, “Girl, will you shut up about them and get your fat ass on a treadmill?”

29 04 2008
brran1

Well Damn Chris.

Idk if I should be offended or if I should laugh. Im a big dude (6’3″, 300+ lbs), but I’m far from looking like the stay puft marshmallow kid you have up there. What do you define as fat? Those morbidly obese type of people, or anyone that’s more than 30 lbs. overweight?

29 04 2008
brran1

Oh yea. Fuck a Fanta, gimme that Fantana in the purple so we can make our own “soft drink”

29 04 2008
Machete

ROTFLMAO!!! The on and offloading fat woman bus story was the death of me.

creativecat – “It should be illegal to make thongs/spandex/halters/etc in fatass sizes.”

Trust me, that wouldn’t stop ’em from going for the medium, small and extra small sizes and squeeeeeezing into them. I can NEVER find a small size at the mall anymore!!! WTF? AND I KNOW the general populace that shops there isn’t mostly small. GRRRR. Ever tried finding XS or even S size at Victorias Secret? IMPOSSIBLE! I now have to order them joints online!

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

“Some fat fuck forklifts herself onto the bus too, nearly flipping the goddamn thing over. The next part of this story I am not exaggerating in the least: the INSTANT the bus pulls off, this gravitron yanks the stop-request cord”.

DEAD

I cant stand those fucking fatasses that want to get on the bus and then want to sit next to you. I had this one huge ass white guy sit next to me one day on the way to work and I swear I couldnt breathe. NOt only was dude like 400 pounds sqeezing me in the seat, he was sweating. How does one sweat so much from sitting. He was sweating liek her ran a fucking marathon. I am sooo sick and tired of seeing these little fat ass babies on tv shows. Kids that arent even 7 yet weighing 100-150 pounds. GODDAMN!!! I use to have this friend that was over weight and she would drive around a parking lot looking for spaces in front of the store so she wouldnt have to walk. One day I just went on her and was like stop being so fuckin lazy, you can walk why you think you have those extra pounds on you stop eating nasty ass mickey d’s.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

stuffblackpeoplehate (13:38:40) :

“…and chris I understand you were a fat child.”

What?

AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHA!!!!!!

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

6’3″, 300lbs. male, fine. 5’3″, 300lbs. female, NO. And being a chubby kid doesn’t count. But being a fat kid, like Fig. 5 is sad, yet hilarious. Shapely fat is more acceptable than ‘all-stomach fat’. Walking/Jogging is the easiest, cheapest form of exercise. Sometimes I walk home from work (work Downtown DC, live Capitol Hill). It feels good to be moderately active and eat vegetables.

29 04 2008
imaG

All I can say I had this one 2 year stretch that everybody that pissed me off just happened to be fat. I began disliking fat people for the longest. Now I have a lot of fat friends that are cool, I don’t hang out with them outside of school but yeah. Fat High School KIDS = GAY.

Fat Community College Moms = The Shit

http://www.anythingblack.net

29 04 2008
roadlesswandering

This was too funny. I’m living in Japan and it’s absolutely disgusting to see soooo many Americans walking down the street! You know who they are because their shirts are too tight and their jeans are starched and they look like they haven’t had to walk this much since they first learned to stand up.

What’s really bad is when you see a tour group of teenagers rolling down the street in too short mini-skirts exposing everything that should have been hidden! They’re always tugging on the hem! I guess the hope nobody notices that stretch marks come in two shades!

29 04 2008
creativecat

Machete, that’s probably true. Maybe we should just pass a law against anyone who’s a fatass from wearing those items.

And I totally hear you on not being able to find small sizes! It’s even worse than it used to be because all of the fatasses bitched about not wanting to be a size 300 so now extra-smalls fit like mediums should.

I’m just annoyed that I’m an adult and have to shop in the kids’ section because of all these fatasses.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahahah just reminded me. My little cousin use to be fat and he basiclly grew up in Japan(my unlce is a cheif in the navy) and was a reall butterball.This litte boy was a fucking mess he wouldnt walk down stairs he would roll down them. NOW thats some lazy ass shit. Now that he is 15 he has lost about 50 pounds.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

I’m 5’11” and around 315 pounds or so yeah, I’m a fat bigro…However, I’m kind of well-proportioned, so I don’t have to buy a second seat when I’m flying or anything like that…LOL

But you know what’s crazy? As a fat ass, I can’t stand to see other [really] fat people. I’m talmbout morbidly obese folks…Hypocrite? Yes I am! My brother and I were at a buffet one time (he’s a bigro too) and we saw a whole family of lardasses piling their plates full of various fried pieces of meat. We looked at each other, got up and left. “you know if we’re staring at them, you know what they’re saying about us!” was what he said…

However, I have been making an effort to try and lose my weight, rather than sit around complaining about it…when I go to school, I park in the farthest garage possible and walk across campus to class, park really far from my apartment, etc. There is a national park near where I live, and I walk on the trails there. However, I know I have to really adjust my eating habits, because I do like starches and whatnot. I don’t snack as much as I used to, and I try to avoid burgers and fries, and I’m finally getting over my fried chicken cravings. It’s not like I’m stirring butter in my coffee or eating deep fried bacon (yes, I’ve seen a video of that nasty shyt) wrapped around chitlins or anything like that…

I managed to lose about 60 pounds when I was in undergrad by cutting out sweets and starches and adhering to a grueling exercise regimen, but when I graduated and moved back home, I was pretty much “fuck effort” when it came to my eating habits. So not only am I trying to lose the weight I was wanting to lose, but the pounds that I gained too.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

I hate Mo’Nique for many reasons.*

1. She isn’t a thick girl, she isn’t ‘pleasantly plump’, she is just big. Jill Scott is an example of a woman who is bigger, but doesn’t look unhealthy. The fact that she is gorgeous helps. Monique is pretty, but she is too big AND disses smaller women to make herself ‘look better’.

2. MO’NIQUE DOESN’T HAVE BREASTS. That is wrong on every possible level. How in the hell are you 300 pounds and an A cup? I find that offensive even.

3. She went on The View and said that Black women don’t shave their legs. No, you nasty fuck, YOU don’t shave your legs. The only time I don’t shave my legs is when I go get them waxed.

Per my standards of judging gender, hairy legs+ no breasts= man.

I don’t hate fat people, I just never want to be one. I’ve been a “bigger girl” (not ever Mo’Nique’s size, more like a Jill Scott) and I will NEVER go down that road again, it was miserable. I’m not skinny now, but I work out at least 5 days a week, eat healthy and take pride in knowing that I have large, womanly breasts and silken legs. At the end of the day, that is what matters.

*-Actually, I don’t hate her. She is a really smart and caring woman. I just hate that she celebrates an unhealthy lifestyle, cooning and hair legs. And where are her titties?

29 04 2008
maya

Let me start by saying I’m 5’4″, 120lbs.

*dodges bullets*

Some people are built with a larger frame – everyone on my uncle’s side of the family (women included, if not especially) are built like Amazon creatures. So my little cousin is tall and wide for her age. But even that shit needs to be monitored, because her pediatrician put her on a dietary plan as a child. That shit is not good for your heart and can kill you.

I don’t have a problem with people being shapely. But, I too, have problem with people who WHEEZE WHEN THEY FUCKING BREATHE. I wanna be like, “motherfucker, you can’t hear that shit???” Ugh, I work with this guy who does that shit on conference calls AND has the audacity to eat while he’s on the call too! I HATE THAT SHIT. And him. *Throwing dirty looks at co-worker*

But, it’s important to remember, being small does not mean you’re healthy (Lord knows I get winded for everything…I promised myself once finals were over I’m going to rekindle my love affair with the gym). But yes, Monique needs to stop the fucking madness. The shit is funny, but seriously. Bitch, you’re big. Someone was mean to you in high school. I’m not saying it was right, and I understand your angst, but let go, and let God.

I’m fascinated by European dietary habits. They eat whatever (but also walk a lot as Chris mentions)…usually smaller meals and a lot of bread during the day, but their dinner meals are NEVER ENDING. And then all the wine! I remember when my family took a trip to Paris, and we sat utterly befuddled as we watched these French people eat the biggest meal we’ve ever seen. They were probably like, “Look at these nosey and uncouth Negroes peering into our plates!” But seriously, it was almost like circus trick.

And cosign to whomever said that comment about soda. Alcohol too.

29 04 2008
Ms. Kristine

Chris sounds like one of my mornings here on the “T”! UGH! You know what I can’t stand is LAZY fat people…come on, you are fat and unhealthy, GET UP AND GET MOVING! If you are fat and trying, I am there for you, but to just sit there and be content with your wheezing and triple-chins is not what’s up!! Yeah, laziness is the real propblem here!

“Some fat fuck forklifts herself onto the bus too, nearly flipping the goddamn thing over.”-PURE COMEDY!

Figure 2.-Exposed thongs is gross, no matter the size–no one wants to see your damn underwear!

29 04 2008
Tamara

Now I like food just as much as the next person, but I really hate watching those shows on TLC about the fat people who are just OD greedy and want gastric bypass. Why the hell are you eating 4 loaves of bread in one day?!!?! What about me?! I always hate going to the supermarket and there’s no bread, and I always think to myself “some fat f***k prolly took the last loaf” Or this OD fat man who couldn’t walk down the stairs to his apt. so he would tie a string from his window and get his delivery food that way.

It blows my life, it really does.

29 04 2008
Esquire

“I’m a fat bigro…”
Dying slowly.

Chris you will inevitably get a buncha posts with the “big boned” argument.

When people say that to me I wonder in my head…why IVE NEVER SEEN A FAT SKELETON?
I mean, all the skeletons Ive seen look about the same. Width wise. They may be tall, they may be short but the bone density looks about the same to me. Then again, Im an attorney, not a doctor. Surely someone will correct me. Maybe its just me? I could be the dumb 110 llber.

29 04 2008
Esquire

MO’NIQUE DOESN’T HAVE BREASTS. That is wrong on every possible level. How in the hell are you 300 pounds and an A cup? I find that offensive even.

I am officially getting fired.

29 04 2008
Machete

@creativecat

HAHA true! I think its called “vanity sizing” where a true size 10 is labelled a size 6, so a size 10 woman will go into that store, put that on and feel really good about themselves and buy it!

29 04 2008
shabooty

my biggest pet-peeve:
http://tinyurl.com/5sk23m

fat-girl angle shot.

29 04 2008
maya

I am dying, ST. I want to pay my last respects.

YES – Where are her breasts? And I’m not sure I buy that whole “pretty” thing as far a Monique is concerned…I saw her without makeup and I was confused as to what happened to her face.

Jill Scott = The most beautiful women EVER.

Re: Hairy legs – My mom tried to tell me that shit back in the day. I think it’s a generational thing, ’cause my aunts don’t do it, either… But I have casually observed some sistas on the bus/train…not all of us are getting down with the Bic.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Maya- Yo, I know dudes who never mess with chicks above a size 8 who would give anything for a chance at Ms. Scott. She is fine! Plus, she seems like she has a beautiful spirit.

I gotta disagree on the big-boned tip. I saw on Celebrity Fit Club once where they refuted the notion of bones being big. I used to think that I had a “large frame”, because I am tall, big chested, my shoulders aren’t narrow….but then I found out that my frame is actually small-to-medium. The only thing large was my consumption of alcohol and Starbucks, and consequentally, my ever-expanding waistline. I’m on some “Never Again” shit with that one.

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

Sister Toldja – I always said that about Mo’nique; how can you be big and have mosquito bites for boobs. She what I refer to as ‘all-stomach’.
Bigro, I mean Leoninatl, that’s wonderful that you’ve lost weight. When I cut out sodas and anything that had high fructose corn syrup -whatever that is, I trimmed down a bit, not that I needed to. But seriously, how do people get so big? It doesn’t happen overnight.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Creative Cat- Um, while vanity sizing is real…..if you shop at the children’s store, you are just really thin. Extra smalls are still…extra small, lol. My BFF is a size 2 and she is very slim, and curvy. I don’t think her clothes would be a medium anywhere but a third-world country experiencing a famine.

29 04 2008
maya

ST – Yes, I’m a big believer in presence, presentation and display. Clearly Ms. Scott is a master of all three.

This rule is a must. I know a lot of skinny girls who think because they’re skinny they can bypass these three rules – not so, I say! In fact, they usually look the worst. Everything doesn’t work for everybody or every body, for that matter. Like flat-chested chicks in TUBE TOPS. As a card-carrying member and CEO of the Tiny Titty Committee, I cannot stand for such wanton disregard of common sense! You have NOTHING holding that shit up, except the annoying lifting you keep doing to prevent that shit from falling. Or, short, round people in capri pants – usually in some nonsensical color like violet, magenta or that fake-me-out-denim. Why do you wish to look like you have a wedgie on both sides?

29 04 2008
Lady

I don’t hate fat people, I actually feel sorry for them. A lot of my fam is from the south… A lot of overweight/obese people that I happen to love dearly. Fat people don’t want to be fat, and if they say they’re happy with themselves only 2% are telling the truth probably. What thin/average people don’t understand is that a fat person has to hear all the bullshit jokes, snickering, endure the stares day in and day out. Whether they’re fat due to lack of self control, laziness, hopelessness, etc you can be sure that they aren’t just out being fat to piss you off or fuck up your view.

Americans in general tend to be lazy, but people accept it as long as they’re not fat. My brother is thin but he’s ‘fat on the inside.’ He eats fast food every day, but since he has a 36 in waist he thinks he’s all good. There are some thin people who have high BMIs.. no lean muscle, but they’re ‘thin’. At the same time, there are some over weight people who have low cholestorol, good blood pressure and aren’t in danger of having heart attacks.

When I was younger my father thought a good way to encourage me to lose weight was to make fun of me so I wouldnt want to be fat, all it made me do is fell worse about myself, like I was less than a person. When i was in my late teens i finally did lose the weight, and I told him to go to hell. I didn’t do it for him, I did it because I like sports but I couldnt keep up so if I really wanted to play I had to get in shape. My basketball plaques/trophies mean much more to me.

Judging someone who is over weight and coming up with all this ‘they stink, they don’t exercise, they’re lazy’ shit is no better than seeing a black person and assuming he’s off to jack someone or to impregnant his 5th baby mama. It’s just more acceptable. Do you know how long it takes to lose weight? All the years it took to pack it on and you see someone fat and just assume they’re not doing anything about it.. how do you know? Did you ask?

I’m going to have to sit this one out, i still love the site but I can’t read a whole bunch of people ragging on people they don’t even know due to how they LOOK only to be in a ‘screw yt’ mode later on for something that was assumed about them. Even though I’m not now, I still have the brain of a fat person and it still hurts.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-MO’NIQUE DOESN’T HAVE BREASTS. That is wrong on every possible level. How in the hell are you 300 pounds and an A cup? I find that offensive even.

bwhahahahah DEAD…I noticed that too hmmm..

Maya-Let me start by saying I’m 5′4″, 120lbs.

*dodges bullets*

hahahah ummm well umm Im 5’10 165 pounds…Im not skinniy skinny but I am slim. I dont have a six pack I have a small belly(from drink a lot of beer) hehe.

**looks around**

Jill Scott is beautiful in so many ways.

As for hairy legs..that bitch is lying. Hair legs is not was up on a woman. My mom was telling me how back in the day when my uncle was dating my aunt she had some chewbacca legs hahaha but she has since learned that hairy legs is not cute. I hate seeing women with hairy ass fucking legs looking like damn Teen wolf n ish and have the nerve to wear a dress or short skirt. My husband’s baby mama does that shit makes me wanna gag. Keep those underarms and legs shaved ladies! and keep up with the bikini wax PLZ!

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

Maya-“being small doesn’t mean you’re healthy” True. People look at me like I’m crazy because I exercise (I’m 5’3″, 135lbs). I want to improve my cardio, damnit. And not be a fatass that can ride rollercoasters and play with my future kids. I like having muscle, sorry. Cottage cheese scares me. I like bikinis. Mo’nique can’t wear a bikini. And Jill Scott, have you seen her live?; she is beautiful.

29 04 2008
Aisha

LMFAOMFOAMFAO. I couldn’t have said this better myself. Fat people are forever saying to me that I’m lucky I have a fast metabolism (I run four miles a day, lift weights, and I am a dancer…which they seem to ignore in favor of labeling me a skinny bitch.) Instead of reading up on foods that don’t inflate their fat asses, they complain that they are “unable to lose weight” as oppose to admitting that they lack the self-disciplinary skills to even rival those of a retarded Chilean sea bass.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@knaturalbeauty:

I’ve had a weight problem since I was in middle school. There’s a whole story behind that I don’t feel like telling, but moving to Mississippi when I was 13 didn’t exactly help. We went from health-obsessed Southern California to soul-food in da durty. We went batshyt crazy for Popeye’s and whatnot, because we really didn’t eat like that in Cali, very rarely.

And laziness…Plain laziness was part of it as well. I was always a bookworm when I was younger, never very athletically inclined, and when I did exercise, I was always wheezing, thanks to that good ol SoCal smog. So when I found out I didn’t have to take PE in HS in MS, I was like, cool!

The funny thing is, thanks to my mom’s health food obession, I’m not afraid of vegetables like some folks are. And I do love walking, and I like lifting weights too. But nowadays, it’s a matter of time management that I have to get a handle on. Also, I want to loose more fat before I start lifting weights. I don’t want a bodybuilder look, I want to have a swimmer’s build so to speak, but not too trim, cause you know black folks think you’re on crack if a big person gets skinny too fast! LOL.

29 04 2008
maya

@ knaturalbeauty –

Yes, I’ve seen her live. AMAZING. I wanted to be her. Or like, have her come home with me and make her dress me up to be pretty like her. I stan for her. It’s kinda weird…and unhealthy…

Yes, even for small people, at some point this whole “tiny” shit is gonna run its course, and it’s a saaaaaaad day when a small person starts to gain weight because you don’t know how to adapt, particularly if you’re someone used to eating whatever you want. So I’m trying to adjust my learning curve now, ’cause I don’t want to have set myself up for the fall.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

One of my homeboys is about 5’6″ and normally about 130-140 pounds soaking wet. This dude can eat like a friggin vaccum cleaner, and it never seemed to catch onto him. HOWEVER, he moved to Mississippi a few months back, and I guess he’s been eating good in the neighborhood, cause when he came up here to Georgia, he looked swole as hell. I forgot how even the slightest weight gains can look on people with smaller frames versus people with larger frames…

29 04 2008
maya

Funny thing is what people don’t seem to realize is that this weight-consciousness thing goes both ways. I’ve heard “you’re soooo skinny” in so many variations throughout my life that it’s not only annoying, but it’s made me very aware of my body – particularly in intimate moments. I’ve looked back on childhood pics recently and said, “damn, i was small…” or “damn, my head looks huge cause my arms look so tiny.” Of course, when you’re small, people are also always concerned about how much you’re eating which is by far the most irritating thing, but you can’t spaz out, because they mean well. For me, it got to the point that I was almost over-eating just to put some weight on. No good. And since my weight fluctuates with a 15 lb differential, it’s never-ending.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

I AM STILL TRIPPIN OFF OF THAT VERY FIRST PICTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!! siurhbgawelgfuirg
er[ouhigsaeolugi7ashjgbsa3perw987guoalwihga0rw987fgu3ilwahbgae9rlg

29 04 2008
iloveblackpeople

I’m still looking for a job in Paris. I worked there for a month in 2006. I NEVER ate SO MUCH or DRANK SO MUCH in my life. I lost 10 lbs while I was there without ANY effort. I do believe it is partly due to the fact that you HAVE to walk everywhere (even in the metro you gotta walk a half mile to the train!). I also think it is due to the fact that the food isn’t full of antibiotics, hormones and other unnecessary chemicals. Additionally, the fact that the entire city is a sauna in June/July also helps (why don’t they like AC there?!?!).

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

IVE NEVER SEEN A FAT SKELETON

OMG STOP IT!!! ALL OF YOU! My stomach hurts so bad, my eyes are so red from crying. There’s too many things to quote on here aside of Chris’ defyign the law of physics comment. I feel like I’m going to throw up now. Dammit, thanks all of you, I needed that laugh today after last night’s discussion and a fight with my girl.

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

Here Lies (alias) Mr. Smith
“Figure 5”

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

Swimmer’s build! *catches drool* *thinks about Jason Momoa*
Note to self: never move to Mississippi, Georgia, Alabama, fucking anywhere in the deep South. If the racists don’t kill me, the food will.
And hairy legs – eww. You can’t be fat and hairy, that upsets the balance in the cosmos. Gross. Are these the same women who ‘accept’ their mustaches.

29 04 2008
stuffgirlslike

Some of my best friends are fat.

Come on people being fat in many societies is a priviledge, I know in Hong Kong a lot of people who were on heroine would see their friends who lost gained wait after going to rehab and converting to christianity. They would immediately want to be christian based on how healthy their friends were.

Black churches are full of women who could exercise more.

Most people are overweight because American portions are bigger than want you get in Europe, In Europe we are taxed by the socialists and cannot spend so much on food.

http://stuffgirlslike.wordpress.com

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@knatural: Peep my name, I live right in Jawga. LOL. In the so-called “black mecca” of Atlanta (well, the suburbs, but who’s ever heard of Marietta?). Believe it or not, it’s actually kind of hard to find good Soul Food in the Atlanta area unless you go to the hood or out in the country somewhere. People tend to like the trendy ish here…There are so many transplants here, it’s diluted the ‘southern’ flavor of the area. It’s still the south, but ‘southern lite’.

I moved from Mississippi in 2004 and vowed to never, ever, ever come back to live there on a permanant basis except for one of the following options:

1) In a pine box

2) In an urn (if I go to glory this way, I want folks to scatter my ashes to spell out “FUCK YOU” all over the Confederate Cemetary in Vicksburg and I want them to throw a party in remeberance of me on top of their graves)

or

3) If I find out the world is ending, I might move back to Mississippi because they’re 20 years behind everyone else…

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Maya-Funny thing is what people don’t seem to realize is that this weight-consciousness thing goes both ways. I’ve heard “you’re soooo skinny” in so many variations throughout my life that it’s not only annoying, but it’s made me very aware of my body – particularly in intimate moments. I’ve looked back on childhood pics recently and said, “damn, i was small…” or “damn, my head looks huge cause my arms look so tiny.” Of course, when you’re small, people are also always concerned about how much you’re eating which is by far the most irritating thing, but you can’t spaz out, because they mean well. For me, it got to the point that I was almost over-eating just to put some weight on. No good. And since my weight fluctuates with a 15 lb differential, it’s never-ending.

Hell yeaaaaaaaaaaaa when I moved to florida i was there for 2 yrs and I lost like 20 pounds I was at 143 pounds. For 2 yrs I didnt see my mom til that December and she wanted to faint. She was concered that i was doing heavy drugs because “i was so skinny”. I’ll admit 5’10 143 wasnt all that damn cute because 1. my boobs shrank(i was pissed) and 2. my ass was disappering(extra pissed). When i moved down to florida i wore a size 10 when i came back after 2 yrs i was a size 6. When my now soon to be husband picked me up at the airport he took me straight to burger king and got me a whopper with cheese and fries and told me i needed to eat because i looked sickly ahhaha well to make a long story short… I got my beautiful figure back and I wear a size 10 and fuckig loving ittttttt. But I still work out and eat healthy now. I use to hate my skinny friends saying that i should be a size 6 not a 10…Rolls eyes. I tell then they need to stop fuckign with those guys that want sticks for gf’s and get a real man that likes a woman with a lil something something.

29 04 2008
Lil Wayne » Fat People

[…] BadmintonStamps wrote an interesting post today on Fat PeopleHere’s a quick excerpt…to work on a Flash website while some idiot 3 seats behind me was listening to stupid fucking Lil’ Wayne so loud I could actually feel… […]

29 04 2008
Esquire

Well if anyone has seen one, let me know. You cant even google fat skeleton.

Anywhoo, @MAYA. I am 5’4, 115 llbs. Bitches are always like..oooh you so skinny. oooh I would love to be your size. oooh dont complain about not being able to find clothes…oooh you make me sick.

But last nite it took me fucking 3 hours to find a pair of black slacks in a size 2. I do not starve myself, my mother is small too. I used to drink ensures, eat five meals a day, because being thin in SC is a felony. People are forever offering me biscuits and cupcakes. Damn! I EAT. A lot too! I am just thin! I exercise because my hubby and I like being fit.

Misconceptions: Thin women do not eat, Thick women eat too much
Truths: Aneorixics DONT eat, Fatties eat too damn much.

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

Wow wow wow, let’s not make this racial. We are talking about FAT people. Although I think they could and should be classified as a race since they fucking out number everyone in America… I LOST 3 FLIGHT SEATS GOING TO PHILLY! This FAT bastard took up my seat so I had to move to 2 aisles back, where i had to move AGAIN because some FAT woman needed my seat for her FAT child who looked to be about 5 but was still in a car seat! You think the madness stopped there?! I was in the window seat, squished against in sitting next to another FAT guy!

Are FAT people from Pennsylvania or something?

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

Since we’re on it,

5’10, 165lbs.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ Iloveblkpeople

YES… WELL SAID. You see… a former manager of mine made a very good point to me a while back. He asked… “If our beef and chickens are fattened up by hormones and steroids, where do you think they go when you digest them? Its not like they just up and disappear because those same nutrients, chemicals, ions, and amino-acids all go into your body and affect your physique.”

The same goes for vegetables that look completely overgrown and unnatural: Apples bigger than my head, Tomatoes brighter than the sun, pumpkins appearing as if they will explode any minute. Those same unnatural chemicals that are used to “present” themselves as more attractive to the consumer are the devil in disguise. Remember the sayings “The bright apple might have a worm in it?” and “Never judge a book by its cover?”

Now… with those said… I would like to touch on the affect of these chemicals on not only the human body… but also the human mind. I truly wonder about all of the processed shit that goes into the food that not only goes into the mouths of middle class children, but also those who rely on welfare. Such chemicals in random over the counter medicines have caused various side effects including: dry mouth, dizziness, fatigue, upset stomach, nausea, vomiting, mud butt, Sudden infant death syndrome, heart failure, sky diving, space shuttle launch, etc… what happens with our food?

It truly makes you wonder what exactly happens to everyones food these days. Doesn’t it? Are we all test subjects… with experimental checmicals… just like doctors prescribe experimental drugs to treat illnesses. I wonder.

29 04 2008
The Voice of Reason

I can go on about this forever! I totally despise these fat, arrogant, overweight, overpaid, overfed, over-privileged, overindulged criminal asshole cocksuckers that are happy and content with being a cantankerous old fatass! I swear some of these mungangous humanoids are going to collapse into themselves if they get any bigger! I’m going to come out with an exercise video that’s going to make P90X, Richard Simmons, and Hip-Hop Abs obsolete, it’s called “Stop Eating You Fat Bastard!” It’s not audio tape, or videotape…it’s duct tape! Put it over your mouth and watch the pounds melt away!! Think about it, people have gotten so fat that they have their own term for it!?! How fat do you have to be to go from being obese, to morbidly obese!?! I’m 6’0”, 220lbs. I played FS at the Univ of Ark and I’m anorexic compared to the bovine behemoths that are grazing all over America. In the grocery store, fat ass has to use a motorized cart to load up on junk food that will increase her gargantuan girth! Then she complains the cart is too small. Waa Waa! Hey Blubber Butt! Stop eating so much crap and ‘gulp’ actually walk around. Try it. You might like it. Just don’t bump into me, or get too close. I don’t want any of the moons orbiting your equator waist to hit me! It used to be that, for bigger-sized people, they’d have to go to a “Big and Tall” specialty shop, or Layne Bryant-type for the ladies. Soon enough, anyone under a 40″ waist, or size 12 will have to go to a special store themselves. And, ok, I’m sorry to the chick with the medical condition, but seriously, if changing some eating habits helps you loose weight, despite the medical condition; you were too fat. Fat people cost us all in the long run via medical care especially. Nurses are in short supply because who really wants to strain their back while trying to roll over some 400lb mammoth to change his bedpan?
I think a lot of the overweight-problem of the U.S. can be attributed to normalizing-fatness. You used to pick on little fat kids, because it wasn’t normal, and damned if there were less little fat kids out there. There’s also not enough people making their own food, prepared food is 99% of the time worse for you, and even when it is healthy, the portions are usually more than should be eaten at 1 sitting. Next step, fat America will start blaming restaurants for being open. These are the people who drink a carry-out tray of three-thousand-calorie iced mocha cinnamon coconut coffee frappe drinks with a softball sized hunk of whipped cream on top and refuse to believe this sugary-mega- lactose bomb could have anything to do with them splitting their Banana Republic Capri pants bending over to pick up their copy of Shape Magazine. It’s only a matter of time before some 800 pound greasy urn out there decides to sue McDonald’s because his heart sounds like a one legged clogger. I’m pretty sure the only reason it hasn’t already happened is because our courts don’t have a drive thru window yet. What lifts my ass off the can is when people who have smoked for fifty years are amazed when they get lung cancer. Last week I read about someone who smoked eight packs of cigarettes a day for sixty years and then decided to sue the tobacco companies because one day he was coughing up radial snow tires. A jury awarded him 200 million dollars, and I suddenly realized that this is the only country in the world where you can make a fortune if you’re just willing to dedicate your entire life to do everything completely wrong.

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

I love The Voice of Reason!

29 04 2008
leoninatl

I used to substitute teach, and I was always observing how elderly those children looked. I was subbing a sixth grade class one time, and I saw a couple of those students, and I thought, “Damn, did you drive up here today?” or “How many times have you been held back?”

I blame that rat milk they feed those students. If I had the money, I’d go organic, I swear…

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Mr. Smith-FAT woman needed my seat for her FAT child who looked to be about 5 but was still in a car seat

Jesus cried and started choking

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Maya: “Or, short, round people in capri pants – usually in some nonsensical color like violet, magenta or that fake-me-out-denim. Why do you wish to look like you have a wedgie on both sides?”

HELP ME OH LAWD!!!!!

I am glad that you rep the TTC well. I envy you all sometimes, because I would totally rock the thin blouse, no bra, sexy/clean hippie look if I were a member. Don’t get me started on dresses either.

@ Lady-I understand why this frustrates you. They were engraving my name on the roster of the Big Girl Club! My day was coming, I was two biscuits away. I used to go in Lane Bryant for bras and the salesladies would say “Why are you in here?” and then one day, it was like “Have you seen our dresses?” I made a change because I wanted to be healthy, and I didn’t want to be the “fun to ride” chick that Chris mentioned last week (I hate you, Chris) but that no man wants to take around the homies. That said, I do believe that most SERIOUSLY overweight people can take steps to improve their health and appearance. We aren’t dissing people with cancer or short men or women with unforuntate hairline. And we did acknowledge Jill Scott as the patron saint of sexy. I lost 35 pounds from my lifetime heaviest and about 23 pounds since late September. It can be done.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Mr Smith Im your twin dude.. I am the same height and weight…weird. either your skinny or i’m fat hahah

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

leoninatl-I blame that rat milk they feed those students. If I had the money, I’d go organic, I swear…

RAt milk OMGG hahahahahcsadljfm,m c.f bdsvjkdsjcdcjkscmxnJKX lMAO OMG HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA

I went organic a long ass time ago..f that…I got my horizion milk taste way better than the food stores milk. I buy organic meats, eggs, all that jazz

29 04 2008
Esquire

Leoninatl,
My husband is 6″0 220 llbs and teaches 6-8. The children are bigger than him.

I think they feed them dog food and make them wrestle cows.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@Esquire:

11 and 12 year olds should NOT have fully grown beards! Some of them kids have more facial hair than I ever will!

And 11 and 12 year old girls shouldn’t have these full-grown women bodies either! All these Chesters lurking out there will be making even more dumb excuses about how they didn’t know “she was that young”

29 04 2008
brran1

AF does make a point. A big part of why all these kids are overweight is because of all these growth hormones and other things they add to the food. Now don’t get me wrong, some parents (including mines) do over feed their kids, but I think for the most part the additives in the food and in milk play a big part in it as well. My older sister (who will be 41 this year) said “You know shit’s gettin real thick when 7 and 8 year old girls are coming on their periods and when 11 year old boys are already 6′ tall.”

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

I totally agree leoninatl- these little boys and girls are so damn grown. I was driving passed a middle school and saw this little girl looked about 12 and she had bigger boobs than me and i’m a 36 C i was liek goooooodddammmnnnnnnn and she looked about 16. There must be something in the water because they kids are growing taller and developing earlier.

29 04 2008
The Voice of Reason

Leonintl: I completly agree, I live in Dunwoody, and there is absolutely no place to get a good home-cooked meal unless, well, you go home! People out here are pretentious assholes, it’s become a light vrsion of California, I can’t stand it! I’m originally from Arkansas and even when I go home and overindulge, I get up and go to the gym and run after my unsuccessful bout with the Itis. People are just lazy!!

knaturalbeauty: love you too babe. *muah*

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Indeed brran1….

But I’ve also got something else for everyone. When I graduated from college, I remember seeing quite a few white people (mainly white girls) who looked like they weren’t a day over 15… yet they were months older than I.

Ten years have passed and in the office I work in, I’ve noticed that these same children seem to roam the halls, tricking everyone on their age. What the hell is the deal with that?

Something is certainly not right.

29 04 2008
brran1

@ AF: Well I mean some people have good genes that make them appear younger than they actually are. Good example of this..Stacey Azz. Oh my bad I mean Stacey Dash. Janet Jackson (even though she had that nose job) doesn’t look a day over 30. But sooner or later, in some cases that shit catches up to them and they go from looking like Nicole Ritchie to Glenn Close overnight. (only happens with most white women. The majority of the black women I know age gracefully).

29 04 2008
Lady

@ Lady-I understand why this frustrates you. They were engraving my name on the roster of the Big Girl Club! My day was coming, I was two biscuits away. I used to go in Lane Bryant for bras and the salesladies would say “Why are you in here?” and then one day, it was like “Have you seen our dresses?” I made a change because I wanted to be healthy, and I didn’t want to be the “fun to ride” chick that Chris mentioned last week (I hate you, Chris) but that no man wants to take around the homies. That said, I do believe that most SERIOUSLY overweight people can take steps to improve their health and appearance. We aren’t dissing people with cancer or short men or women with unforuntate hairline. And we did acknowledge Jill Scott as the patron saint of sexy. I lost 35 pounds from my lifetime heaviest and about 23 pounds since late September. It can be done.

@ ST

After my rant before i felt a little silly.. but it does frustrate me. Most of my southern fam is set in their ways, I can’t tell big mama not to put a stick of butter in her corn bread she’ll tell me to pick a switch and then force me to eat the food anyway.

After growing up hearing my dad and aunts pick at me, make fun of me, look at me in disgust i became immune to what guys think, or what classmates may think. If my own family would make fun of me, an elementary school kid who they are ultimately in charge of feeding, cause I didn’t have a job or money.. then why would what a stranger says bother me?

Overweight people can take steps to better themselves, and i know some(most) people feel that if they don’t, then they deserved to be made fun of, but I don’t feel that way and I think that’s extremely foul. So called adults can be as cruel as school kids, if not worse. If your teeth look like you were raised on a diet of bricks you can fix that too.. if your skin looks like braille you can fix that too. If you have so much facial hair people call you ‘sir’ you can fix that too, but how many people make fun of people for those things like they do fat people?

If it wasnt for basketball i may still be 6ft and 294 lbs if not bigger. But i was good, and i wanted to play so i got up, put some glad bags and sweats on and ran in the morning, ate egg whites like they were going out of style and stopped eating so many carbs and by jr. year i was able to play.. i had something to work for, but not everyone has something to set a goal for..

I don’t play anymore but I got kids.. so i’m maintaining at 212. According to medical charts i shouldnt be more than 185 I think, but i’m worried about looks.. it’s for health. No one ever says look at that fat chick/dude he must be so unhealthy, they always refer to how they fat person makes THEM feel.

29 04 2008
benjie

i know an 8 yr old girl who wears a size 14.

a woman’s size 14.

its ridiculous cause her mother still allows her to spend an insane amount of money daily at the corner store.

i have always been thick. and i dont think that i would look right skinny. (remember when kelly price got the bypass and her head was huge on that tiny body? she looked like a blow pop. not a good look for harlem)

but now that i started going to the gym, i’ve found that excercise is the best thing for me. we just need to get more fatties on treadmills instead of drinking their weight in milkshakes…

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

brran1-Now don’t get me wrong, some parents (including mines) do over feed their kids.

Exactly. I was over my friends mother’s house a few months ago and she was making this big ass pot of food. Like i swear I didint know they made pots that damn big. She looked lieks he was making food for a whole army. They are from Sierra Leon. OIn their country big women are beautiful and are believed to be more rich than slimmer women. So when it came time for us to eat, Her mom would make comments liek you need to eat more and she would put more foos in my bowl and stuff. I’m like damn hold uppp i’l already full and i still have food from my 1st big ass serving. Thats why her damn kids are over-weight now because of all the food she feeds them. Liek my friends sisters 1st child isnt even 4 yet and he is a butterball and dont get me started on her 15 month old, that boy is gonan be big too.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@brran: You know Black don’t Crack! The only older white women I know of that has seemed to have aged gracefully are Bernadette Peters (she’s 60, and doesn’t look a day over 45) or Sophia Loren

@ The Voice of Reason: Finding soul food in Dunwoody?! LMAO…That’s like finding a California Pizza Kitchen in Bankhead. Ain’t gon’ happen!

I’ve been living in the ATL area for the last 2 years, and while I *generally* like it, it damn sure ain’t the be-all and end-all like some folks like to portray it. I have been considering a move to Dallas (low cost of living, black folks seem to do pretty well there, midway between the coasts, not too cold) or DC (family up there, great city to me, but the cost of living is high as hell), but I’m doing my research, that’s for sure.

29 04 2008
Lindsay

Checking in at 5’5″, 135 lbs (or so, I don’t really know).

I agree with Lady, and have often come to the defense of family members who were “born fat,” as it were, and can’t get slimmer than what we’d consider “plump.”

Cosign everything that’s been said about skinny girls not eating. (Though I’ve never considered myself skinny…everyone else made that judgment.)

Cosign on Mo’Nique. I don’t hate her, but I strongly dislike listening to her.

Cosign on the “if I was your size, I’d be in everything” discussion.

That said,

I also hate when bigger people sit next to me on the train (part of the reason I don’t sit anymore) and look at me like I’m supposed to move over to give them more room. (I put my [tote] bag between myself and the window, but still only take up ONE seat.) They wedge themselves in (I know my size is why they sat next to me in the first place – they never sit next to each other), find they’re having difficulty getting past the outside armrest, look at me, look at my bag, then give me a dirty look.

I shrug, as if to say “if you can’t fit in the allotted seat space, I don’t know what to tell you.”

Then they try to sit back (but usually can’t), stare ahead and accept it.

C’est la vie.

29 04 2008
Fruity Pebble

…Gravitron?
Can’t…breathe…oh…the…visuals….
Chris, you’ve done it again! This blog is like finding a tiny piece of heaven every day…

29 04 2008
The Voice of Reason

Leoninatl: My bad let me clarify my statement. I’m not looking for sould food in Dunwoody, but I havent been able to find any good food in all of Atl that I could write home about. The bbq joint across the street from Miss Ann’s Snack Bar is pretty decent. Glady’s Knights house of chicken and waffle’s should be blown up!

29 04 2008
dynamicdiva

@ 2. MO’NIQUE DOESN’T HAVE BREASTS. That is wrong on every possible level. How in the hell are you 300 pounds and an A cup? I find that offensive even.

I have been screaming this for years!!! How can you be that big with no breasts?! I am smaller than her and I have double d’s. Its like the fat went everywhere except her breasts!

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

*blushes at The Voice of Reason*
There’s a fat girl in my office who’s adverse to walking four blocks to grab lunch. She only wants burgers, or something really meaty and makes fun of me because I like salads and vegetables and fish. Huh?
And why does insurance cover gastric bypass surgery but not fillings for cavities or braces?
@Lindsay, I have the same experience, and opt to stand also (I sit most of the day anyway). If I do sit, and Fattie wedges here hamhock in, I don’t budge, just to make her feel more uncomfortable. I know it’s cruel, but she’s crueler for being my age and that fat.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Being 5’8″ 195… people probably believe I’m the next stay puff marshmellow man. Well I’m not. I played football and baseball in my younger years and the bone structure of my parents is much denser than normal.

Do I appear chunky right now? Yes. My normal weight is 175… despite standards saying that I should be 140 pounds. With that said, I will now state this. In 2004 I took on the challenge to drop from 190 pounds down to 155 pounds through diet and exercise. Well… the Atkins (which is absolutely horrible for you) and South Beach diets both worked and helped got me down to 155. But when looking at pictures taken of me back then, I now understand why many of my friends asked me “Are you getting enough to eat these days?” I looked horrible… malnurished and almost alien like. This is where the flaw in that awful weight standardization comes in.

I’ve known several women who were between 5’4 and 5’6 who weighed in between 140 and 150 pounds… yet look thinner than a hair strand. Their bone and muscle density is exceptional and the fact that they keep their weight and tone in check is the reason for their acceptable asthetics.

29 04 2008
brran1

@ leoninatl: I’m thinking about moving to ATL for grad school (Georgia Tech). I love being in DC/B-More b/c I have fam here and i know where everything is. Part of the reason why I was thinking about moving was the cost of living. I heard it’s mad cheap down in GA. Would you say that ATL is overrated?

@ Mrs. Epps: I know about Puerto Rican food. Whenever my stepmother cooks Arroz con grandules or Arroz con Pollo, I’m usually the first one in there. I know how you feel.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@The Voice: Gotcha! Yeah, GOOD soul food is hard to find in the metro area…And from what I hear, the Gladys Knights House of Chicken & Waffles is better in Downtown than the one out in Lithonia.

Hmmm, I don’t work too far from where Miss Ann’s is. Oughta go there for lunch break…

29 04 2008
maya

@ ST-

Yes, i’ve had a lot of people (including my mother, who used to be rail thin) comment on the “bra-less hippie chic” thing. For some reason, my nipples dont like air. I wanna try it, but I’m not that brave. I’m fighting the urge to say I’m coming to Brooklyn so we can have a shopping day. :o)

@ Mr. Smith –

I don’t know about PA as a state, but they say Philly is the fattest city in the country. Probably because of out love of cheese steak, soft pretzels, water ice, and other shit that has been slowly killing my ass since age 3.

29 04 2008
Mrs. Kennedy

ya know Lady,
I firmly believe those charts are not meant for black women. At 5’1, my weight range was 99-121 lbs. When i weighed 99 lbs, i was EMACIATED, and as a result, I was wearing two pairs of pants and wonder bras to fake some thickness and get some negro holler. I finally gained some weight and got some thickness at 125lbs. . . That was 15 lbs ago. . . Damn Harolds chicken.
Anyway – those charts suck. Its really about whta looks good on YOU . . .

29 04 2008
ne'

lmfaooooooooooooooooo

fatty’s need to get it togther… bwhahahahahahahah I fuckin love this blog!
Somehow he is in my head

29 04 2008
leoninatl

My ideal weight for my height is supposed to be anywhere from 155-185 pounds depending on what stupid chart is being used… There is no way in hell I’m going to get as small as 155 pounds. I’ll look like I either am on crack or have a sickness…

29 04 2008
The Voice of Reason

Nothing is worse than a fat broad with little, itty, bitty titties!!! Being a breast man myself, I find this phenomena more confusing than white women with ass!!!

leoninatl: Be careful in Miss Ann’s, she’s like a black soup Nazi. Just make sure your phone doesn’t ring, or she will dress you down!!

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

@ Maya,

I had heard that too. I also heard Milwakee was the fattest city due to close fresh beer consumption.

Why are our children FAT? Look at figure 5! It killed me. I’m talking to you all beyond the grave because of the two FAT kids in figure 5!

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

And since we’re on it, I love me some big ol’ round, not saggin down to your belly button titties. Get me goin, grab my attention, calms me, quiets me. Gimme titties, a cute face and AT LEAST a shaped bottom and I’d be ya mans

29 04 2008
brran1

I believe for my height (6’3″) the range is 190-210 lbs or something like that. I went to the doctor’s and to a dietitian a few months back and they both told me that my ideal weight is 250-260 lbs because i’m already at almost 220 lbs of muscle mass. (add in all those vital organs and teeth and what not).

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

AF- dont feel bad my man is 5’8 and 191 pounds and he doesnt looks fat or anything at all i like it. He use to weight around the same as you when you lost weight and he just looked fucking skinny and looked liek he need a damn cheesburger.

BRRAN1-I know about Puerto Rican food. Whenever my stepmother cooks Arroz con grandules or Arroz con Pollo, I’m usually the first one in there. I know how you feel.

hahha I do to since my mother is 100% Bori dudeeeee i lived off Arroz con Pollo y Papusas(an el salvadorian dish) So I’m with you. I make Arroz con grandules every other week. Yummm mouth waters… but some Arroz con Pollo with a nice cold one Ahhh tha’st the life but you mos def will get fat if you eat it everyday. I so pissed that were we moved barely has any Latino ppl it atleast an Latino owner resturant. I have to drive back to our old stomping grounds in “Julio land” as my husband calls it just to get some Pollo Rico( has the best chicken on the planet)

LMAo at me type “y” instead of “and” like I’m writing in spanish. SMH

But the food my friends mom made I dunno what the fuck it was really. ti was a mixture of rice,cow tounge(gag i would just put that to the side) dried shrip, beans,and curry goat( which is some goooooddd shiiiitttt).

Gimmie some oxtails and curry goat and I’ll tear it up and rice and peas( as the jamaican’s call red beans and rice).

I’m hungry now

29 04 2008
sarah

OMG, there is nothing sexier than a man standing at 6’3″ weighing in at 250lbs.

29 04 2008
Lindsay

Ditto Mrs. Kennedy –

at 5’5″, I’m “supposed” to be in the 120-125 pound range.

I was never that thin. The lightest I was was 128, and that was during high school track and field. I wore a size 0 and had little to no hippage.

Now, I’m in the 135 zone, and I have hips and all that. But I’m still a size 2-4.

So yeah, those ‘mainstream’ averages don’t apply to us. One girl in my office is the same height and size as me, but is only 115 llbs. She was shocked when I told her I was 135.

29 04 2008
maya

damn you ms. epps for talk of oxtail.

i love latin american food. and i may be working up in lil puerto rico soon. god help me. i love rice.

29 04 2008
Lolo

High Fructose Corn Syrup. It is the devil’s potion and it’s in everything. We scan all our labels since my kids were old enough to read and they KNOW that anything with HFCS is tightly controlled.

If your kids are healthy weight from birth to five years old they will much less likely to struggle with weight in adulthood and if it’s not in your house then they have to binge on it at their friends’ homes. It cuts down access.

I just beg all the obese to please at least keep themselves covered up. Seeing the thong and bra cut into the fat like rubberbands into a sausage is a cruel sight to subject the rest of us to.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Mrs. Kennedy-I firmly believe those charts are not meant for black women. At 5′1, my weight range was 99-121 lbs. When i weighed 99 lbs, i was EMACIATED

I know right when I went to my doctor she tried to tell me that i was over weight and that i should be between 135-140 pounds. I fucking 5’10!!!! I would be a damn stick. I think those charts are for white women personally because the only 5’10 women I ever seen and was 135 pounds was WHITE with no body what sooooo ever…

Most of my weight goes to my ass and boobs and to my thighs as well. But I still look good. I will never try to be 140 sumpting pounds again!

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ leoninatl…. precisely. When they said I was supposed to be 140… I would certainly look like a crack head.

@ Mr Smith… I am with you. Give me some titties to play with and I am good to go. 🙂

@ Mrs Epps… Thanks boo. I’m certainly happy to return to 175-180 any day. I won’t lie though… Graduate School made me pack on the pounds… so now its time to work them off. 😉

29 04 2008
The Voice of Reason

I’m not really into +size women but there’s something about Jill Scott & Laila Ali that makes me weak in the knees and stiff in the pants!!! Mmm! Mmm!! Mmm!!!
damn! Damn!! DAMN!!!

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

maya-damn you ms. epps for talk of oxtail.

i love latin american food. and i may be working up in lil puerto rico soon. god help me. i love rice.

hellll yeaaaa girlll! You know what cracks me up when ppl say lets get some mexican and they go to Taco Bell.. bwhahahah that aint mexican that’s some american style of a wanna-be taco. Take your ass to Langley Park and get you some good food off the pupusa truck hahaha 🙂

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Latin food will fuck you up though. My mom was over weight for a good few yrs until my dad had his heart attack last yr and then she found out that she had epilepsy. So she said f everything Im gonna loose weight. Now she has lost 100 pounds and is sexy ass hell well.. she was always sexy. But shoot now we are the same size. Im just glad that she doesnt have the big ol alien head that some ppl get when they loose weight like Star Jones ** shudders**

29 04 2008
maya

AF – You are telling the truth about graduate school. I shit you not, I bought some slacks, took them to the cleaners to get hemmed, called myself “goign out” the other night and put them on, and the bitches looked like they were being strung up with straight pins. All graduate school does is consistently make you restless, hungry and lethargic. Particularly if you work (and are a head case like me who takes 3 grad level courses at once), there isn’t time to do anything but the bare essentials. When finals comes, you look like you lost a street fight in Kuwait because you haven’t slept, and you’re only eating the shit that won’t make you pass out immediately after because you have THOUSANDS of fucking pages to write afterwards. So you’re eating crap, though not very much, and your weight does a horrific riverdance up and down the scale.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ MAYA- EXACTAMUNDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MOST SPECIFICALLY:

“All graduate school does is consistently make you restless, hungry and lethargic. Particularly if you work (and are a head case like me who takes 3 grad level courses at once), there isn’t time to do anything but the bare essentials.”

29 04 2008
Natalie

“The next part of this story I am not exaggerating in the least: the INSTANT the bus pulls off, this gravitron yanks the stop-request cord. The bus comes to a halt at the next stop less than 200 yards from her point of entry, and she lumbers off the bus as the vehicle’s suspension heaves a sigh of relief.”

HAHAHAHA

Is it sad that I’ve seen skinny people do this too? In Baltimore County there’s a subway Metro stop right in front of an apartment building in my neighborhood and people literally get on the bus at the Metro stop, sit on it for a 1/2 hour as it waits for other people to get off the subway only for the bus to drive them around the corner and drop them off at their own building they stared at from the bus. These people could walk to their apartment and be home in the time it takes for them to sit on a bus.

29 04 2008
brran1

@ Natalie: I know exactly where you’re talking about. lol I used to ride that bus to get home from school as well.

29 04 2008
Jaiden

Chris,

I knew you growing up and you redifined the term “Husky!”

Oh yeah, you need to stop hating on people and earn some money to buy a car. Or sell your lap top and buy a scooter. Unless you are at the public library or using your work computer to write posts….

29 04 2008
maya

@ AF –

Yes, I am on 4 hours of sleep as we speak, with 7 pages left to write and a presentation to stumble my way through tonight on readings that I barely skimmed. I am at “work” feeling crotchety and mean, giving mad side-eye to the whites, waiting for someone to so much as sneeze in my direction for me to start snapping. I’m on my R. Kelly, “Heaven I Need a Hug” swagger right now. As y’all could’ve assumed yesterday by posting that I had my hair wrapped at 2:30pm, I didn’t even GO to work yesterday. My hair had been in a perpetual doobie for the last 3 days (because I was just that focused) and when I took the shit down this morning, I looked like Polly Pocket.

Jesus be a fence around my soul and an extra hour of sleep tonight…

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

sarah (16:18:40) :

“OMG, there is nothing sexier than a man standing at 6′3″ weighing in at 250lbs.”

Man, a man of 6’3 is just……good gracious…..I love tall men. Short men gets no love from me, sorry. I’m 5’9 and 6’0 in heels. I don’t want to look like I am walking with my son. 250 is good, 200, 180….so long as he has broad shoulders and don’t look like a pencil with a penis.

Montell Jordan is 6’8. I dream of him till this day.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Jaiden (16:49:06) :

Chris,

I knew you growing up and you redifined the term “Husky!”

I CANT FUCKING BREATHE!!!!!!!

29 04 2008
maya

LMAO @ Montell Jordan. Yuck.

Co-signing tall men. I’m 5’4″ and like looking up. I like big hands.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@ My Grad School Comrades:

Tell me bout it. I have a 20 page paper due on Monday, but I’m going out of town this weekend for my brother’s graduation, and the last thing on my mind when I go to Florida is a damn paper. AND I have a presentation tomorrow that I need to BS my way through (I’m in Marketing/PR, so I can BS with the best of em though), so I’m going home early today to work on all this crap…

29 04 2008
LJ

This is too hilarious… fatassitude…

29 04 2008
Merri Lee

*crying* I worked at a soul food restaurant, and we had a regular who had to walk in the door SIDEWAYS, plus she and her friend had to sit at a six top table, because even the four top was too small for her. And yes, she ALWAYS got diet soda.

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“I knew you growing up and you redifined the term “Husky!””

If you think I’ve ever been anywhere near husky, then you a.) don’t know me, b.) never knew me, c.) have a horrible memory, d.) are confusing me with someone else, or e.) all of the above. My Algonquin name until I turned 15 translated to ‘small’, and Indians do not name their children to be ironic.

“Oh yeah, you need to stop hating on people and earn some money to buy a car. Or sell your lap top and buy a scooter. Unless you are at the public library or using your work computer to write posts….”

That was so funny I almost spit out my caviar. Do you realize that you just came to a website called ‘Stuff Black People Hate’ and asked the author to stop hating? Do you have any idea how ridiculous you sound?

As for my income, I think the $130 per hour I bill on average suits me just fine. Thanks for the advice, though 🙂

29 04 2008
maya

@ leoninatl

Yes. They should’ve never given my fast-talking ass a degree in journalism and a job as a publicist. That means they have officially co-signed all the rubbish I put together. This presentation tonight is going to be one for the books, as was this final exam I just got an A on. Ha. Let’s not even talk about how I cited myself in this 20 page paper I’m writing because I lifted 2 of my own pages from a previously-written paper and plopped them into this new one. Work smarter, not harder.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Jaiden-Chris,

I knew you growing up and you redifined the term “Husky!”

Oh yeah, you need to stop hating on people and earn some money to buy a car. Or sell your lap top and buy a scooter. Unless you are at the public library or using your work computer to write posts….

BWAHAHAHAH ummm i have the perfect song for this chick who is prob Chris’ ex-girlfriend

29 04 2008
maya

@ Chris & his $130/hour – damn, lets stop the shenanigans. Do you like your pancakes with whip cream, butter or fresh fruit?

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Maya- don’t hate on my boo. And “BOO HISS” at your short ass taking the tall men! A man of 5’8 is a giant compared to you. STAY IN YOUR LANE!!!

Chris, you been quiet today. Someone has to diss you to get you to speak? In that case, there are pictures of a penis of minute proportions spreading about the web with your name on it. Care to refute?

29 04 2008
benjie

damn chris

you just ignited my inner golddigger

29 04 2008
Sylph

I love you all.

leoninatl – If you got to go caffinated, go with Lipton tea. Not in the bottle, the teabags. Brew the suckers.

5’8” 153 pounds. Yes, I want to gain more weight. Yes, I like to eat food; we’ve been friends since I can remember. In terms of taller man, anyone 5’11 and shorter need not apply. I’m not supposed to dwarf you when wearing 3 inch heels.

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Chris, you been quiet today. Someone has to diss you to get you to speak?”

It’s not an issue of getting dissed – I get dissed all the time on this blog, especially in my earlier posts.

My issue is with someone claiming to have ‘grown up with me’ and, with them saying I was rotund as a lad, knowing they’re either lying or mistaken. Long story short, it’s creepy…and now that I think about it, it’s probably just Chicken Jon fucking with me.

I will neither confirm nor deny allegations of my one inch penis.

29 04 2008
Lolo

I love short men because I don’t like feeling like a kindergartner next to my man. My parents had the whole big man/tiny woman thing going on and it was embarrassing when I realised that they were like a freaking circus act. The fuck was wrong with them, 6’3″ and 4’10”?? That shit ain’t right, at ALL.

I like to be able to look at my man’s face when we’re standing and not be able to give a blowie just by tilting my head forward or look up the nose when I want to get a kiss.

You ladies go on ahead with your giraffe fetish but I’ll just keep on over here with with a guy that I can slow dance with and not look like we’re at the junior father/daughter dance.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-Maya- don’t hate on my boo. And “BOO HISS” at your short ass taking the tall men! A man of 5′8 is a giant compared to you. STAY IN YOUR LANE!!!

HIGH FIVES LIKE SHIT!!!!!!!!

I’m 5’10 and only shorter men hit on my and that shit use to piss me off. My mother told me when i was younger that I would marry a shorter man. Now look I’ll be married next yr to someone who is 5 fucking 8 thanks MOM! hahaha

As for Chris umm soo like i’m single as of now and I will make your pancakes in the nude and served on my titites with whipped cream strawberry ans syrup and put you ass in a sugar coma.

Point me in the right direction to the jobs that pay 130 mother loving bucks an hr.

29 04 2008
Lolo

@ Chris

One inch isn’t a penis, that’s a bigass clitoris.

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Point me in the right direction to the jobs that pay 130 mother loving bucks an hr.”

Man-Whoring is awesome work if you can get it…

29 04 2008
Sylph

“I will neither confirm nor deny allegations of my one inch penis.”

And the world became very sad. Still wouldn’t kick you out of bed.

29 04 2008
maya

@ ST – OMG, I just busted out laughing at my desk. I hate my job, but you fuckin’ with my money, homie! Yesss…my little ass likes them tall. I’ll take you at 5’11″…but I want 6 ft – 6’5″. They love small girls, too..hehe.

Doesn’t matter though. When they’re that tall, they’re usually ball players (I don’t like athletes)…you gotta get past all the groupie white girls first…and their egos.

29 04 2008
maya

HEY! I can’t help that I’m sure and I like tall men. Stop all that damn high fiving! Lol. And you know what’s awful, I get annoyed when short men come up to me.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

bwhahahah@ Man-whoring….I was actually thinking of doing some amature with my man and get paid for it like the ppl on youporn. They make hell money. We actually want to start our own porn company.. to the ppl who read my comments on here shouldnt be surprised.. I almost always re-direct the subject to porn or sex.. Im such a perverted woman hahahaha

29 04 2008
Merri Lee

side note – why does Dr. Phil think he can give diet advice? WTF????

29 04 2008
Lolo

Don’t do porn, that shit never goes away and some day your kids will be asking questions about why they should go to college instead of fucking for money.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Maya- We are gonna box. Meet me in the trap. It’s going down.

Chris- Just funning with you. Someone once commented on one of the blogs that I write for and said I was a woman of ill repute at Howard. I had to laugh.

Also-Do you like your pancakes with whipped cream, strawberries or DDDs?

29 04 2008
Lolo

You know when you’re that short your man just uses your head as an elbow rest, right?

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

maya-I’ll take you at 5′11″…but I want 6 ft – 6′5″. They love small girls, too..hehe.

forget you and your tiny ass!! I never got why tall men like short ass women..its like walking around with their daughter! Why break your back to kiss her when you can have a 5’10 sexy long legged chick that you can see eye to eye with. I think tall me seek shorter women because then they feel like they have more power over her. Just my opinion. But I love my 5’8 hunnnybun he picks me up all the time tryna act like he is a big man and likes to give me piggy back rides hahahah I think he grew though or i shrunk because now he looks like he’s my height now a days.

29 04 2008
ne'

**ADDS MY 2 CENTS**
I am 5’1″ size 135lbs.

I LOVEtall men 6’0″ to 6’5″ 180-210 lbs

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

What’s wrong with ‘shorter’ men. They need love, too. 😀 I’ve always preferred them. I’m 5’3″ and don’t want to feel like I’m standing in a hole next to my man. Besides, eliminating shorter men means I could be eliminating a good man. And DDD’s! Lord. How do you deal with those things AHAHAHAHA…

29 04 2008
Educated NSU Demon

I have to continue to thank you Chris. You’ve pretty much said everything that’s on my mind, but don’t have the balls to say because most big people could kick my skinny ass. lol And I don’t even have an issue with all big people, just OBESE people.

29 04 2008
ne'

corrections…
* size 6…
*LOVE tall men

29 04 2008
Merri Lee

Lolo (16:24:07) :

High Fructose Corn Syrup. It is the devil’s potion and it’s in everything. We scan all our labels since my kids were old enough to read and they KNOW that anything with HFCS is tightly controlled.

Co sign like I have never co signed before! HFCS is POISON! I know a woman who lost 25lbs in one month giving up HFCS – no exercise, no other diet changes, didn’t give up alcohol. SUGAR is a sweetener, CORN is food. This is why we have this B.S. food crisis – we’re wasting corn as ethanol and corn syrup instead of eating it!

*gets off soap box, grabs inhaler and blood pressure meds, fans self*

29 04 2008
Lolo

Tall men like tiny women because they want to try out the “sit n’ spin” is all.

29 04 2008
ne'

It’s just something so sexy about a tall man. As I get older I like for them to not be so thin, I want a LITTLE BIT of thickness.

29 04 2008
ne'

lol @ lolo I may have to try that

29 04 2008
maya

Hey now, dammit! Mrs. Epps and ST are my homies any other day, and I will not stand idly by and get my neck sliced and diced because I’m short and happen to have an affinity for those with long legs (…and they love me back!) And Mrs. Epps, I don’t know what you’re complaining about…you’re married and booed up on some “forever” mess. Can I at least find someone I can stand to be around for more than 3 weeks??? Greedy!

I like feeling short. Honestly, I kinda wish I was 5’1″. I don’t know, it’s weird. It’s not like my dad is particularly tall, either, he’s like 5’10”. I don’t know, it makes them seem more manly. I like feeling hovered over…protected. And it’s funny, most dudes like small chicks if not for the power thing, because they think we all have a napoleon complex…which, is kinda true. I’m a fiesty broad.

Okay, ST…let’s say we split the populace. I don’t really like brothas with locs too much, and I don’t like light brights. I like ’em kinda prep, occasional weed smoking doesn’t offend…who do you want?

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Tall men like tiny women because they want to try out the “sit n’ spin” is all.”

Explain. Explain NOW.

29 04 2008
Lolo

@merri lee
http://www.thefactsaboutfitness.com/news/hfcs.htm
I’ve always believed that shit is poison but when I read about how it doesn’t leave you feeling “full” like other sugars it made me light headed with the wrongness of it. Perfect for the corporations, eh? Drink it, eat it and still leaves you wanting more ….

29 04 2008
maya

*dead* at “sit and spin.” if i’m thinking of the same thing…i must ask why did someone try that on me? much coordination required.

29 04 2008
ne'

I seriously would like to try this sit and spin. It sounds freakishly exciting!

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

@ Maya. I hear you. I find tall men attractive as well, I just appreciate a man with presence, and doesn’t rely on height alone to exude confidence and protectiveness.
Sit and Spin?! Is that the Helicopter?

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Sit and spin- man is on his back, woman is on top and rotates. And you don’t have to be short to do it! Just agile.

29 04 2008
ne'

HOW DO I ADD AN AVATAR?

29 04 2008
Hot,Cool&Vicious

well, HIGH FIVE maya and ne’!

I’m 5’0 and i loOoOoOoOove tall guys! I’m sorry, but short guys get no love:( … nice guys get more play than them!! Sure, they are always the cutest, but theyre still tiny… not a good look if im tiny, too.

29 04 2008
Lolo

@ Chris

You mean you were banging the asian gong and you never learned about this? Dude, you got ROBBED. It’s actually really fun if the guy is strong enough to work it right.
“A small girl, between the height of 5’2 and 5’5, in the weight class of 95 to 105 pounds, who could, nay SHOULD, be placed upon your penis and spun around in a sexual act.
oh my god, amber is such a sit and spin. i would bang her lights out.”

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sit+and+spin

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

maya-Hey now, dammit! Mrs. Epps and ST are my homies any other day, and I will not stand idly by and get my neck sliced and diced because I’m short and happen to have an affinity for those with long legs (…and they love me back!) And Mrs. Epps, I don’t know what you’re complaining about…you’re married and booed up on some “forever” mess. Can I at least find someone I can stand to be around for more than 3 weeks??? Greedy!

DEAd hahahaha girl i’m only kidding. I got mine so Im straight. I was just talking about before I was the “ball and chain” I found that more shorter men would come up to me and ask me out. That shit was annoying. But I should shut up because most of my ex-bf’s were atleast 6 and up hahahah ok i should STFU now. 🙂 But still.

At the funeral@ sit and spin.

I would think the sit and spin could potentially be painful for the guy. What if she moves the wrong way and **SNAP** bubye Mr. Bubbles. ahha

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Maya- Ok, we can do this. I will take the light bright, no problem. Do you prefer dark or medium? You can have 75% of your fave and we split the rest down the middle. I will take the dreads. I need a hand full of preps, but you can take most of them. We can split those who know “The Chief”. Deal?

Oh, and you can have anyone under 5’11. Knock ya self out!

29 04 2008
Sylph

Is that the sole weight requirement? Cause….

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Everyone has done the sit and spin! How else do you transition to a reverse cowgirl?

29 04 2008
ne'

Hot,Cool&Vicious

I feel bad cause I do not, and will not date a short dude. I won’t even look at him twice.

*side bar*
I cought a guy “gwaking” at me today and he almost ran into a door. I laughed and immediately thought of this site!

29 04 2008
Sylph

This is true.

I think you and maya need to come up with trading cards. Just throwing the idea out there. Both of you need to come up with a slogan for it too.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-Everyone has done the sit and spin! How else do you transition to a reverse cowgirl?

I like doing the reverse cowgirl thats a fun workout. We havent done the sit and spin thought due to him having a bad experience with an ex. haha poor guy..

29 04 2008
Lolo

Yah, that weight class is pretty fucked up. I mean, I used to be that tiny but you know, unless you’re a teenager or genetically predisposed that just is not even real world weight.

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…AHAHAHAHAHA@You mean you were banging the asian gong and you never learned about this? Dude, you got ROBBED
Sister Toldja – oh god, a man with locs. No words. Like reins to tug on.
But all the ‘short’ man bashing 😦 Look, we all have our preferences, that’s cool, not judging for that. But why jump on a man who dates outside, maybe that don’t equate, but you know what I mean. And what is short anyway, for a man – 5’7″, 5’9″?

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

LOOK AT THIS CONVERSATION!!!!!!!! LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!

29 04 2008
Hot,Cool&Vicious

ne’,

Girl, was he TALL?! ahahahaha

29 04 2008
sacramentoqueen

I hope my son isn’t short

29 04 2008
london

chris…
chris baby…
you are right on time with this one…
just got home from a really bad day at work… the journey involved a fat yardie woman eating a kfc and her mate chatting about ‘dey man dem and ting’
i hate to see fat people eat in public…. have they no shame…
she talked while chewing..
& i am sure i got a waft of her sweaty beef curtains when she sat down next to me.. and that’s above the smell of the kfc…
it is also raining so her weave stunk too..
i had to move…
am still reeling from the experience..
i am off junk food for a while…
i will have the image of her in my head as a warning…

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Hey ho, ho hey. I am not bashing short men! There are PLENTY of women out here who are perfect for them!

**Points at Maya**

But I am tall! And just as there are men who wouldn’t get my magic lady love for lack of height, there are men who deem me too tall, men who wouldn’t talk to me when I was heavier (or even now). I could be rejected by men who don’t like high yellow women, or pretty women, or good smelling ones, or nice ones….everybody’s got their something.

I think short for a man is under 5’8?

29 04 2008
Lolo

5’6″ to 5’10” is my ideal range. Over 6′ just too much but hey, I’m very happy that there are many tall women out there for the big men.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Thanks for the support knaturalbeauty… (I think… I’m pretty sure you weren’t being facetious)

I will not lie… I’m 5’8″ so I suppose I’m the short dude in most of you ladies books. Now I’ve noticed that comments are coming from women who are both tall 5’10+ and small ( x < 5’3″) about “short dudes” who seem to have been defined here as anyone less than 5’8″. Well since that is the case… what is there left for the good gravitationally challenged gentlemen if all the ladies don’t want them? Date outside of their race? I suppose this is where the question stands… would you ladies give a man of 5’6″ standing the crooked eye if he was with a girl who was Asian or White… yet you know you would never date him?

I’m sure I’m going to get myself in trouble here… so flame on if you will. I’m just saying.

29 04 2008

Hot,Cool&Vicious:

He was tall lol,.

Short to me is also 5’8″ and under 5’9″ is pushing it, depends if the legs are short. YUCK @ SHORT LEGS AND LONG TORSO

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Average height in the US: 5’4 for women, 5’9 for men.

Lolo-You are my starship.

29 04 2008
maya

I’ll take a medium to a dark. Not too dark. Not too medium. Like a chocolate brown. Chris Webber…*swoon* Who are we forgetting? Oh, brothas who wear Amber White might have to slide on my side.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

AF- Have you met Maya?

29 04 2008
sarah

short for a man is under 5’10” and i feel you on tall men liking petite women. it makes me mad, cause i too am 5’8″.

Co-signing tall men. I’m 5′4″ and like looking up. I like big hands.

girl, i have a hand fetish!

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Let me also add…

I can understand if a taller lady believes that a man shorter than she is short… and would thus prefer a man who is taller than her. That is perfectly fine. I just don’t understand a woman standing at 5 feet even saying she doesn’t want a dude who is seven inches taller than her. It doesn’t make much sense.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

ST- haha… true true.

29 04 2008
maya

Ooh, I also don’t like football-player type tall men. They are just celebrated fat men to me, and once I had sex with one of them and I was extremely overwhelmed (and understimulated). They get extra grabby and heavy handed with us small people. So you can have them…I have friends who LOVE football players. I want the basketball types.

29 04 2008

Admiral Furious says:

would you ladies give a man of 5′6″ standing the crooked eye if he was with a girl who was Asian or White… yet you know you would never date him?

————————————-

I never give a man a crooked eye if he is dating out of his race. I have my thing and men are entitled to have their “thing” I date whomever I want and feel like everyone should do the same.

I do however be seeing some FINE brothers who are dating non-black women, and I be gwaking.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

AF-I wouldnt give him the crooked eye because you like what you like. Some ppl like short guys, tall guys, short ladies, tall ladies, black, white,asian,latino ect. Do what it do..

29 04 2008
maya

LMAO. My best friend dated someone who has 5’9″…my ACE is like…4’11 and her exboyfriend couldn’t have been any more than 5’5″. My good friend says that “black men who date white women might as well be gay.” I generally subscribe to this, and yet I have found myself eating my words as of late… I wouldn’t give as much crooked eye to a short brotha with an Asian or White girl cause I know black women love big men…so eh…?

As for AF – I mean…I have found myself making exceptions to lots of things based on personal swag and gentlemanly behavior. Hasn’t happened yet with short men, but a couple of light brights have wiggled their way in.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

So much for meeting Maya (if I was single)… I used to play football.

CAN I CHANGE TOPIC REAL QUICK…

I’d like to point out all of the black people who are being cleared for crimes they DID NOT commit through DNA testing? Though i do not know the process in which these cases are cleared… I’d like to point out that obviously there is a flaw in the justice system that all these innocent black people (primarily men) are being sent to jail for crimes they did not commit. Has anyone been keeping up with this? 30 people in Dallas ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Stink eye…black women…

I’m keeping my mouth shut this time.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious
29 04 2008
Merri Lee

Ok, we went from sunburn to porn, now fat people to sex? I love y’all!

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

ST-Average height in the US: 5′4 for women, 5′9 for men

Yea back in 1974…

AF-I can understand if a taller lady believes that a man shorter than she is short… and would thus prefer a man who is taller than her. That is perfectly fine. I just don’t understand a woman standing at 5 feet even saying she doesn’t want a dude who is seven inches taller than her. It doesn’t make much sense.

Right exactly! What’s up with that. You fucking 5’1 and someone who is 5’8 is to short wtf..I mean he is taller than you right?

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

Ok, bashing was a bit harsh, sorry. And if a you’re a tall-drink’a-water, Amazonian with DDD’s 🙂 then you should probably be with a taller, broad-shouldered man – it’s all about balance I guess. I think Admiral was clearer than I was. I guess I mean to say, and I know I’ll get jumped on but this is just opinion, not truth, but why do Black women limit themselves so? We have all these preferences – he’s gotta be this, he’s gotta be that – and seems to keep us stagnant. If I’m 5’3″ and my man is 5’6″, 1 2 3, he’s still taller.
I think women equate height to power, protection, strength, which is a natural human thing, but, that dude that’s 6’1 could be the biggest bitch in the world, whereas peewee has the heart of a lion.

29 04 2008
Lolo

@Toldja

I hope that Chris wakes up the to gift of your presence and begs you for some reverse cowgirl and pancakes, once he gets over crying about missing out on the sit n’ spin from all those asian girls who robbed him of his Pearl Cream.

29 04 2008
Hot,Cool&Vicious

would you ladies give a man of 5′6″ standing the crooked eye if he was with a girl who was Asian or White…

hell no!! lmfao

29 04 2008
Merri Lee


Admiral Furious (18:26:01) :

So much for meeting Maya (if I was single)… I used to play football.

CAN I CHANGE TOPIC REAL QUICK…

I’d like to point out all of the black people who are being cleared for crimes they DID NOT commit through DNA testing? Though i do not know the process in which these cases are cleared… I’d like to point out that obviously there is a flaw in the justice system that all these innocent black people (primarily men) are being sent to jail for crimes they did not commit. Has anyone been keeping up with this? 30 people in Dallas ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh AF,

In Texas it’s illegal to execute the mentally retarded – so they no longer test to see if a person is retarded. Pretty soon they will dispose of DNA evidence after a statute of limitations has passed (I don’t remember the details – Texans help me out here) – even if the defendant hasn’t gone to trail/had a chance to get the DNA analyzed. Bible belt my @$$, they clearly don’t listen to anything Jesus was about.

29 04 2008
maya

Yes. Tall punk-bitch men should be shot in the face for wasting both their height and my time.

29 04 2008

ST SAYS:
I mean…I have found myself making exceptions to lots of things based on personal swag and gentlemanly behavior. Hasn’t happened yet with short men, but a couple of light brights have wiggled their way in.

I AGREE, I have the opposite taste though, I have a prefrence for light brights, just not too white, but some chocolate men have wormed their way in.

29 04 2008
Seven

@ Maya – you get a big “right one” to the Monique comments! I thought I was the only one who noticed her small tits on that large frame.

@leoninatl – “who’s ever heard of Marietta?” I have. I went to school not too far from Atlanta and I live in a Northern Suburb now. I agree – Atlanta is ok, but I’m looking forward to getting the hell out of here, too. If you can handle the move to Dallas, go and don’t look back. I trying pinpoint my next relocation as we speak!

Lastly – those figures are HILARIOUS!!! Luckily, I have a cold and allergies, so I can muffle my outbursts of laughter with a cough and sneeze. 🙂

29 04 2008
Lolo

My only real WTF when it comes to outdating is when I see handsome black men with fugly white women and also, handsome white guys with pie faces asian chicks. I’m all “dude, she has a face like Goodnight Moon, the fuck is wrong with you??”

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

All is forgiven, Knat! I am really not that superficial. I think most women prefer a man to be a little taller than her. And lucky for the men, for every dude who is 5’3, there is a chick who is 5’0. Actually, I had a male friend from college who was a 5’3 PLAYA. His presence was greater than most dudes a foot taller, he was brilliant and good looking.

Lolo-HAHAHAAA! The chances of that are doubtful. But funny related note- I got my friend reading this blog and she called me talking about “Why don’t you go out with Chris?” and I was befuddled for a minute like “What the fuck are you talking about? I don’t go out with Chris no more, he crazy!” and then realized she meant THIS Chris, like I knew him in real life. My sister said the same thing.

29 04 2008

I am 5’1.5″ thank you very much 🙂 and I cannot explain to you why I prefer tall men.
I like dominant men (not to dominate) so I guess subconsciously I associate dominance with tall men. lord hammercy I don’t know I just know what I likes.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ LOLO….

OMFG LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “she has a face like Goodnight Moon”

sljkfngoseilgkj.saerngfpaoeugilsajkengsaeor8lfisakrjnfsldfiujhvszdf

29 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“My only real WTF when it comes to outdating is when I see handsome black men with fugly white women and also, handsome white guys with pie faces asian chicks. I’m all “dude, she has a face like Goodnight Moon, the fuck is wrong with you??”

So…….very…….difficult…….to…….silence………self………

Admiral, I need you to kill me.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Knatrual- I agree with you women do do that. Especially black women. I will admit I didnt limit myself by having a certain preference. He had to be 6 feet and up, carmel to cinnamon in tone, beautifull brown eyes,nice smile, no chest hair, 6 pack all that junk.

And then once I started dating that it wasnt all that great. The dude was either a liar or a cheater and a player. And then I met my man who is 2 inches short than me, a little chubby but not noticeable,manly chest hair, curly brown hair, on the yella brown side and kinda dorky but really kind and knows who to throw blows if needed for my protection. And he is the the best man I ever dated in my life. AND HE”S PACKIN!!! aahahah

Ladies dont under estimate the 5’8 men out there they will trerat you like a motha freakin QUEEN!!

29 04 2008
Hot,Cool&Vicious

yes, i am 5’0, and yes, i think any guy under 5’9 is short. ideally, i prefer 5’10 and up, but there are a lot of short guys running around, so i’ve had to make exceptions. Swagger and personality are super important, but just like any preference (height is mine), everyone has a characteristic that will land ANY person in the friend/not a chance in hell zone. Chris dissed a badd chick cuz her name was Lala!! just sayin’…

29 04 2008
Muse

Screw being PC, FAT PEOPLE IRRITATE ME. There is no freaking excuse for being fat. Screw the genetic issue. Americans are fat because they are LAZY and EAT TOO DAMN MUCH. Fat people piss me off on another level because there are starving people all over the world and these hungry fucks eat well more than their recommended daily intake.

ERRR Chris you picked the wrong topic because my supreme bitch is about to come out.

Back in the day people were not fat because they got off their asses and actually participated in outdoor activities. Parents made their kids get up from the television and run outside. Now folks are lazy and complacent. There is no excuse for being fat besides the lack of discipline. Oh and all you emotional eaters need to get see a therapist. Food will not change your crappy lives.

Oh and Black women: FAT DOES NOT EQUAL THICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Gawd you guys have no idea how much I want to punch fat broad’s face when she is 300+lbs and talking about she’s thick. WTF? You are not thick bish! Beyonce is thick, Marilyn Monroe was thick, Kenya Moore is thick. Queen Latifah is NOT THICK.

Sister Toldja, I like most of your comments but I have to call you out on this one. JILL SCOTT IS FAT. She’s a pretty, but a fat girl nevertheless,

When I was a broke college student at USC, I had the displeasure of sitting next to a fat person on the economy section of the airplane. When the plane was about to take off, I put down my arm rest and the next thing I know the fatty next to me was whining saying that the arm rest was pinching her side fat. I looked down this bitch’s rolls were all on my side of the fucking seat. She was complaining that I was being inconsiderate. I told her it is not my fault that she doesn’t fit in the seat. Anyway the airline stewardess came over to see what the conflict was. Fatty said I was assaulting her, I said she was in my space and I paid money to put my arm rest down in my shitty economy seat. The airlines advise the fat chick that she was supposed to buy two seats and they could not force me to keep my arm rest down. Since the fat broad was also taking up part of my seat, the airlines was courteous enough to upgrade me to first class since there was an available seat. I also complained about having to sit next to a fat person and the airlines also gave me a voucher for my troubles.

29 04 2008

lmfao @ all of you 30787702783770717701828781565424983!@#$%^&*()_+_)(*&^%$#@$%^&*(*&^%$#$%^&

29 04 2008
benjie

my momma always tells me that a man ain’t a real man unless he’s (at least) 6ft tall.

now, my father was like 5’11. so i really don’t know how much sense that makes.
but i have a preference for tall men. i wear heels and i’m 5’7. plus its nice to hug a dude and be in his chest.

and…

“My only real WTF when it comes to outdating is when I see handsome black men with fugly white women and also, handsome white guys with pie faces asian chicks. I’m all “dude, she has a face like Goodnight Moon, the fuck is wrong with you??””

*dead*

29 04 2008

rotfl @ goodnight moon face!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know exactly what this face is. I can’t
I just can’t. I am going to be fired for pissing my pants if I keep reading this.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Lolo-My only real WTF when it comes to outdating is when I see handsome black men with fugly white women and also, handsome white guys with pie faces asian chicks. I’m all “dude, she has a face like Goodnight Moon, the fuck is wrong with you??”

Im so dead at this comment….I just woke up my dog who is upstairs. My laugh just echoed throughout the whole house.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

@ maya, basketball types are just as heavy handed as football types, but basketball types have bigger hands. The bf is 6’8″ about 235 of tasty lean muscle. I’m 5’5″ and around 130 right now. I got up to about 140 and felt gross about myself. I don’t understand how people can get to astronomical sizes. Didn’t they feel gross about themselves once they hit a certain point? I lost my ten pounds and am fine now but really: what’s up with that?

And thank you, lovely posters, for not using that dumbass “the average american is fat, so we’re all fat” bullshit excuse. Every time I’m in some forum talking about fat people, they’ll say the same shit about how “not everyone is a size 2” and all I can think is, “well…not everyone is a size 20”.

29 04 2008
sarah

wow, its weird when someone speaks on topic here. it seems so irrate, which is why i refuse to comment on this topic.

29 04 2008
Muse

Sorry I had to get that off my chest. A fat girl use to pick on me when I was a small frail kid. She would literally sit on me until my ass was nearly passed out. I would be able to hold my own in a fight until the bitch got me on the ground..then it was over….

29 04 2008
Muse

benjie I know what you mean. My dad is 6’3 so I’ve always had a preference for taller men. The tallest guy I’ve ever dated was 6’7. Besides since I’m 5’9, need a tall man to look up to LOL.

29 04 2008
Merri Lee

@ Muse, I once boarded my flight, to find a morbidly obese man in the middle seat taking up ALL THREE SEATS. I showed the stewardess my ticket and said, “I can’t find my seat.” She looked at it and said, “Oh, it’s right heeeeeeeeeee….”

I got to sit in first class!

29 04 2008
Muse

Sarah you just commented on this topic LOL.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

I came in on this topic hella late.

29 04 2008
Muse

I fly only business or first class now because the sits are large and I don’t have to worry about some obese broad invading my seat. Thank God for frequent flyer miles. American Airlines makes it easy to upgrade to business or first class for free if you are at least a Gold Member.

29 04 2008

lol muse.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Muse-I never said Jill Scott was thick. I avoid that word because it is too vague. It’s a woman with a size 25 waist and a 28 chest who thinks she’s thick because she has large nipples, and a woman who is a size 42 dress who’s email adress is THICKAZZHELL@hotmail.com

I use the word big. She is big, but not huge. I rarely say fat, but if I did it would be for someone huge like Mo’Nique, who lends herself to the mean term by bashing other people. I think fat is subjective. I also heard Jilly from Philly looks a lot smaller in person.

29 04 2008
Muse

Sister Tolja,

I call it like I see it. I love Jill Scott, I think she is talented but the girl is fat. Serena Williams is a big girl as well but you would never but the two in the same category for obvious reasons. I think folks hyper sensitive these days and don’t want to be blunt. If someone is fat and it hurts their feelings being called fat, do something to change it.

29 04 2008
benjie

6’7

*drools*

the last guy that i dated that was almost that tall, was SERIOUSLY lacking in the downstairs.

that was dissapointing to say the least.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

All this “fat” talk makes me want to hit our mini GyM in the guest bedroom toodlez hommies!

29 04 2008
sarah

damn, i’m caught 😦

29 04 2008
Muse

Benjie I couldn’t do anything with the 6’7 guy because his penis was way too big…When I saw it, I got scared LOL. Hehehe I could not let him batter my poor vagina with his tool. I wanted to though. What a waste….

29 04 2008
Lindsay

*returns three hours later*

LMAO at Goodnight Moon…

I’m 5’5″, my boyfriend is 6′.

That’s not so bad, right?

…Right?

*looks in ST and Mrs. Epps’ direction*

29 04 2008
Carmen Sandiego

Okay, I’ll admit, I’m 5″4 125lbs and i LOVE IT.

I can walk everywhere, not get tired, people breathe a sigh of relief when i sit next to them on a bus or plane, and I can eat without having to count every calorie.

that said, the obese people of the world glare me down worse than a dog eyein a piece of bacon. As if its MY fault that they’re fat! I understand its not easy to lose weight. I understand they have to shop at specialty stores. I DONT understand why they can’t even attempt to change their habits. You dont need that Venti Extra Caramel Extra whip cream Caramel Frappaccino or that Double Big Mac. They DONT have to drive the three blocks down the street to get to the bank.

I think you should be healthy. Being morbidly obese, even if you do live in Mississippi, etc. is NOT healthy.

Its just not NORMAL to get winded when you walk from the downstairs the upstairs of your own freakin home.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

You think seeing a dude of 6’7 with a small joint is sad…..imagine my face when I met a fellow of 7’2 who was not even seven….I don’t feel like crying about it again, let me shut up.

29 04 2008
benjie

ST-

really?!?!

*sheds a tear for you*

thats just ri-goddamn-diculous

29 04 2008
Lolo

“It’s a woman with a size 25 waist and a 28 chest who thinks she’s thick because she has large nipples, and a woman who is a size 42 dress who’s email adress is THICKAZZHELL@hotmail.com

Okay, I just fell down and am thanking Chris for this blog so that I don’t have to read about the real world today.

29 04 2008
dynamicdiva

I was never overweight as a child but as an adult I am now overweight. The good thing is I am working on it!! Hopefully I will soon fit some of my old clothes! With that being said I have always loathed fat people and I still do. And I especially loathe the ones who use their fatness as a disablility.

I also use the word big. I consider myself big. I can’t stand when people use the term “thick”, and or “plus size”. That range is too damn big. I am 5’10 and wear a size 16. So although I will easily admit that I need to shed some weight I don’t want to be lumped into the same group as the morbidly obese.

I can’t stand when people don’t have a neck or ankles is describing themselves as “thick” or voluptuous. Um, no your fat asshole. If you can’t seat in a booth at the restaurant then you are fat!

Period!

Did anyone see that show on TLC where they showed the obese people how much they had consumed in one day? It was crazy. The entire table was covered with food and then some!

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Lindsay-**sharpens knife**

I’ll let it slide THIS time.

29 04 2008
sarah

ST – i met the man of my dreams a few years ago. he was exactly my ideal standing at 6’3″, 280 lbs, dark chocolate, football player. when he took his clothes off, his body was sick! and then he took his pants off… and i got mad.

funny part of the story really is that, because we were into each other, i didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so i gave him a try. best. sex. ever!

29 04 2008
zoso

I was always a little plump as a kid but wasn’t really made fun of ’cause I was tall. I didn’t exercise a lot growing up ’cause I was prone to passing out/dizzy spells. The freshman 15 didn’t claim me (mostly cause I was broke) but yea not having mom’s soulfood pretty much started the weight loss. I think I started college at like 200lb (I’m 5’9″ so it wasn’t horrible). Then I started practicing traditional karate and aikido. I dropped weight like nuts and scared the hell outta my mom. Now I fluctuate between 160 and 175, depending on if I have a martial arts competition/test coming around. Personally, I think the best way to lose weight is participate in a sport that you really like, which’ll lead to viewing food as fuel for the sport.

@AF: Hey Goodnight Moon was the shit growin’ up. But yeah for a face it’s shit too…

29 04 2008
Seven

@ Muse this guy with the tripod action going on…is he single and remotely close to Atlanta? LOL; my co-working and are cracking up over here. She says and I quote “I wish some would batter the hell out of me!”

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

oh god, now penis size. Like I said – size has little to do with skill.

29 04 2008
Mr. Smith

If you aint got no size to work with, there’s no point in having skill. I can do back flips while layin it down, don’t mean a damn thing if you can’t feel nothin

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

You know… as much as we say that fat people are this, that and the other… there is a disorder called Hypothyroidism, which can cause hormones in women to go out of control and make the woman gain weight uncontrollably. So with that said… obesity can indeed be attributed to a disease.

29 04 2008
Lindsay

Hm. That knife-sharpening makes me uncomfortable.

At the risk of eye-rolling and inducing gags, allow me to explain:

We met in 8th grade, and I didn’t know he was gonna be 6′. He didn’t even really get to 6′ until we were about 20-21.

So put the knife away. 🙂 Woo-sah.

29 04 2008
Esquire

Basketball players over footballs players Maya? No baby no baby no.

I need a muscle to grab on. Not a big tall bone.

@Sister: Nice explanation of the sit and spin. We politely refer to it as the Merry go Round.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

Ladies again big things come in small packages as well. My ex was 6’5 and he was about 7 1/2 and now that I have my hubster who is 5’8 he is about an 81/2 -9 🙂 and gooooddddd lawdddddyyy this man knows how to flip it, lick it stick,body slam it and kill it. Hands down better than my ex WOOOOOOO

**fans self**

Oh its on tonight now hahahah

29 04 2008
Muse

I have to preserve vaginal tightness for my husband. The 6’7 guy had a 10 inch penis and it was VERY Thick. I was like omg, I can’t do this….OMG It won’t even fit! It was like a full grown cobra fell out of his pants. I need my penises to stay under 7 inches seriously. The last thing I need is a hysterectomy while having sex.

29 04 2008
Esquire

Hypothyroidism:@AF, I once knew a girl who had this. She wasnt fat. She honestly looked swollen and uncomfortable. Like that chick from Willy Wonka.

So fat is fat.

29 04 2008
Muse

Esquire I like my guys tall and leave…Someone who is toned but not bulky. Has for his package, as long as he knows what he is doing, size doesn’t matter.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

This tangent is out of control god damn…

Just an aside… again… in addition to the original topic…

You know… as much as we say that fat people are this, that and the other… there is a disorder called Hypothyroidism, which can cause hormones in women to go out of control and make the woman gain weight uncontrollably. So with that said… obesity can indeed be attributed to a disease.

29 04 2008
Lolo

So. Since we got here, from fat to cock, I gotta ask.

Is it cool if he’s a tall fatass with a huge dick?

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@lolo: “Goodnight Moon”?! LMAO

I’m pretty ‘live and let live’ when it comes to folks dating outside their race, but I can’t stand to see a black dude walking around with a busted ass YT chick and swearing up and down they got a dimepiece. Don’t piss on my fucking leg and tell me it’s raining!

@Seven: Actually, I’m in Kennesaw, which is even more obscure than Marietta. Marietta is more ‘well-known’.

Yeah, I know I’ve got the “looks” before when I board an airplane. I don’t have to get the extra-big seat belt though.

I have to fly down to Florida Thursday on some no-name budget airline, so I know I’m going to be squeezed tight. I pity the folks that have to sit next to me. I had to fly on a flight one time next to this couple, both of whom were fat asses, and me being kind of big, that was the longest fucking 45 minutes of my life.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

7 and under? fuck that….

29 04 2008
Seven

“…hysterectomy while having sex.” = priceless

29 04 2008
benjie

um no
(at least not in my book)

you have to be able to FIND the dick
who feels like digging through the rolls just to get to it?

and plus that…can you imagine doing it with a tall fat ass?
all the smells, and unknown regions….

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

*sigh* length vs. girth? Who actually measures a schlong? Are you eyeballing it or do you whip out the tape-measurer? How can you felate 🙂 something that huge anyway?
Fatties’ lifestyle usually causes obesity, not disease; especially in this country where two-thirds of the population is considered obese.

29 04 2008
Muse

Er I mean tall and lean…not leave bah!

29 04 2008
zoso

“unknown regions” hahahaha

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ Esquire: My mother, My grandmother and my Great Aunt had these. My mother avoided the weight gain through early treatment

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypothyroidism

http://www.womentowomen.com/hypothyroidism/weightgain.aspx

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

@Carmen, I get that nearly every day from these girls at school (I go to UC fucking Berkeley and these chicks are still highschool hating on people) give me dirty looks. I went to get a sandwich from the deli and there was some fat ass behind me. I get my grilled chicken on wheat with cheddar (never American ) cheese. So the fat ass will get the fried chicken sandwich with EXTRA American cheese and bacon on sourdough. So I’m just messing with my phone, texting and whatnot, and this girl was like, staring me down. I was thinking, okay maybe she’s not looking at me so I pretended to look at the menu that was in her direction and she looked dead at me. So I nodded at her and she did nothing but stare back at me. At this point the deli lady is like, please hurry the fuck up. So i get guacamole, lettuce and tomatoes. The heifer behind me starts breathing hard and I turn and look at her and SWEAR TO GOD she says: “You know, just because you eat that and I eat the fried chicken doesn’t mean you’re better than me.” I was in shock. I was minding my own damn business wondering why the fuck she has to get up in my grill on her self-conscious bullshit AND bitch ended up getting mayonnaise, mustard, and onions on hers, a packet of Starburst and a fucking DIET coke.

Oh and I was nearly killed by these large women in Lane Bryant. My mom asked me to go in and look for some stuff for her while she got some money from the ATM. The saleswoman comes right up to me and is like, “Can I help you find something?” in that simpering, “What the fuck are you doing in here skinny bitch?”-type way. I barely got out that I was waiting for my mom when she literally turned tail away from me without another word. So I’m left to wander the shop for a good 5 minutes by myself. I got death stares from the six or seven women in there, not including the two women behind the counter who just plain ignored me. When my mom wandered in I clung to her like a little baby koala.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

I’ve never had the ‘sit&spin/merry-go-roun’ tried on me. I’m always scared that the female will mistarget my ‘leon jr.’ and it’ll snap and break. That shyt has happened before to other people.

The short guys I know tell the women they’re trying to holler at that it’s all about ‘proportion’

29 04 2008
Muse

KnaturalBeauty, I was curious so I did measure it. Is that a problem? LOL.

Admiral Furious most fat people develop diseases as a result of their weight issues. I do sympathize with individuals who are born with conditions that cause their weight to be out of control, but those people are the minority.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Mr. Smith (19:15:11) :

If you aint got no size to work with, there’s no point in having skill. I can do back flips while layin it down, don’t mean a damn thing if you can’t feel nothin.

I, um, am usually against the “no-homo” thing….but that might have been a good time to say it….

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Just to be clear… I was mentioning hypothyroidism because it exists… IN NO WAY was I trying to indicate that they are the majority.

29 04 2008
sarah

i knew a girl with Hypothyroidism and she was huge as a result. she is a marathon runner now, so she is way thin now.

i feel you Muse on the *ahem*. some guys scare me with their size. size doesnt matter to me. its all about the skill. i’ve had guys with bigger tools that were horrible and, like it said, the best i’ve had was with a smaller one.

29 04 2008
Seven

Kennesaw + Barrett Parkway = move immediatley
J/K – I don’t have much room to talk, I’m in Alpharetta 🙂

Flights can be brutal -I was sandwiched between two big folks the last time I flew to New York. I was completed pissed and started to complain, but I felt bad. I wouldn’t want anyone to call me out because I’m tall. Since reading some of these comments (Thanks Muse) I know now to voice my concern and maybe I can get a more comfortable seat!

29 04 2008
Esquire

I dated a bball player. 7’1 (a whole buncha llbs, dont know) We never had sex, I just couldnt. I felt as though he would somehow ruin my chances of having children.

is my husband reading this?

I perferred big men, but not giants. Sorry Shaq. Though I might make an exception for Dwayne Wade who is a big tall mountain of delight.

29 04 2008
Esquire

“You know, just because you eat that and I eat the fried chicken doesn’t mean you’re better than me.”

YES IT DOES.
Even though I will fight over fried chicken

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

Meh, smaller, bigger. As long as they are not like, midget penises I think most women are fine with them. But you will get your random size queen who can’t do without a huge dick that jabs her cervix. Yuck.

29 04 2008
Lolo

I had a roommate that was a Playboy centerfold and she did just that, brought one of those little rulers with her to the clubs, the six inch ones and would just straight up tell the men that they had to beat that ruler or no roll. She was skank but it was worth it just to see the looks on a man’s face while trying to decide whether to brave if for her fine, fine looking self. “You must be longer than this to ride this ride” is what she would say.

I really don’t get the girls who are toting up the inches once you get past ‘average’ cuz uh, you might as well just wear a sign that says “HUGE vag, needs muledick, pronto!” and get it out of the way.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

That’s wack, @ NotBlonde. As I mentioned before, when I do my bra shopping in Lane Bryant, people tend to give me the “What do you want?”, but not in a super skank way, cause I’m not thin….I just don’t need no LB clothes, lol. But on the flip, imagine how they feel on a daily basis. Even the Lane Bryant models are too slim for the Lane Bryant clothes. As we see here, some people have some really fucked up attitudes about big people and while you all claim that you don’t eye roll or treat really heavy people with contempt…..well, I wouldn’t be surprised if that weren’t true. . Maybe because I have struggled with weight in the past and have to work very hard to keep from being a ‘fat girl’, I’m just a little more sensitive.

It’s worth mentioning that my sister is a heavier woman and she has the perfect husband while I am stuck here with *points to Mr. Invisible*.

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

I see incogman hasn’t showed up here. I suppose he’s afraid he may come up a little short huh?

Additionally, I counted about 6 people here who have dated men 6’6″ and taller…

I see about one dude who is over 6’5″ every month and I get out quite a bit.

Are you ladies dating the same dudes or is this just pure coincidence? (lol)

29 04 2008
leoninatl

According to Superhead, Shaq is actually of modest endowment.

But this is Superhead we’re talking about. She probably has dildos in her glove compartment for emergencies.

OT: I went home early from work today and I’m sitting here watching ‘Cheaters’. SMDH at this low-expectation having wench this kneegrow is creeping with. He took her to Arby’s, and she hopping out the car to get him some napkins like they somewhere fancy like, um, Red Lobster…LOL.

29 04 2008
benjie

i went in lane bryant once because i saw a necklace in the window that was hella nice
i went in, purchased said necklace
got it home and promptly realized that my neck was to skinny to fit it

for some reason it never occurred to me that it would be to big.

and lolo.. dammit you’re gonna get me fired. lmao.
if it happens i’m living with you. i

29 04 2008
leoninatl

@notblonde: THat sounded like an insecure, ignant heifer (yeah, I spelled it properly) at that restaurant… What the hell? She know she eatin wrong, and thinking someone was thinking about her ugly ass!

29 04 2008
sarah

I really don’t get the girls who are toting up the inches once you get past ‘average’ cuz uh, you might as well just wear a sign that says “HUGE vag, needs muledick, pronto!” and get it out of the way.

dead

29 04 2008
Muse

Admiral most of the guys I’ve dated are between 6’1-6’3. The 6’7 guy was an anomaly. LOL

Besides I’m a tall woman and taller men tend to gravitate towards me so…yah.

However I DID date one guy who was 5’8. He was fun and very confident.

29 04 2008
Pelle

You had me giggling at the word “Gastropod”, well played sir, well played.

But you had me in tears at “Stay Puft Fleshmallow Boy”.

You are hilarious! Live forever.

29 04 2008
Laurel

“Thickazzhell@hotmail.com” Ha ha ha ha.

I don’t know. I feel bad for obese people. I think they’re just addicted to food because there’s so much of the bad (sweet, salty, fatty) kind in America. In most other countries you’d be hard-pressed to find a vending machine every hundred yards or a coffee shop that will give you a mocha fatachino to go. Add that to the depression among poor people and it’s a recipe for disaster. If most people knew how to prepare healthy food they’d be in better shape.
Thank goodness I’ve been a runner since I was a kid. My dad was an athlete and he had all us kids playing sports since we could walk. I still put in 35 miles a week — so I can enjoy my Oreos every now and then. :0

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

ON ANOTHER TOPIC

ANGER LEVEL 20/10

THIS HERE IS A METHOD OF DRIVING RESIDENTS FROM NEW ORLEANS

http://ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2008/04/29/they-gave-him-money-to-fix-his-house-now-they-want-it-back/

29 04 2008
Carmen Sandiego

@NotBlonde—-NO WAY.

I’m 20, and Oh God, what kills me is when I’m shopping at the stores that carry thinner, younger sizes and cuts like Forever 21 or Charlotte Russe and I pull out a halter top, look over, and see, no joke, at least a 40+ 200 lb woman pulling out the same top in large. Just because it says large don’t mean its THAT large.

I put mine back.

Thats not to say that I’m hatin on the grown and sexy. My thing is, you should look your age. When I’m 40, I wont be wearing low rise jeans and midriff tops becuase I want to look respectable when I pick my children up from school. Now, I’m 20. I’m allowed.

29 04 2008
Esquire

@AF,

Actually that is a good point. I will explain while trying to keep myself anonymous to those from SC.
I went to the Univ of SC, am from a town near Clemson, and had a good friend who dated a certain pro athlete

Being a petite pretty little girl who could roll a blount, knock back a brew, and maintain a 4.0, it was very easy to get dates from men who were college and professional athletes. I did not chase cleats, but I was usually in the right spot at the right time. 😉

In other words, if you live in a small state with a lot of big tall athletes, are cute and nice, its TRULY not that hard to meet big tall giants. You will oft find yourself running away from them.

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

“a huge dick that jabs her cervix”-NotBlonde AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Get hit at the wrong angle in there and disaster is eminent.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

I look at certain fat people with contempt. My younger sister is heavier…but not fat by any means, she’s got the extra layer all over and huge boobs so she looks bigger than she really is. She is what black guys call “thick”. I don’t mind thick people as they are quite normal.

I look with contempt at the lard asses wheeling themselves around on those electric chairs and piling their carts at the supermarket with junk food and soda. I can’t stand seeing them at McDonalds or similar fast food resturants. Take your ass to Subway. I really can’t stand the fat people who whine and bitch about skinny people or look at ME with contempt for daring to be of a smaller than average shape.

I feel sorry for certain fat people who look like they have hypothyroidism (you can tell them from just fat people because they look oddly lumpy and swollen), or like they are just miserable in their own skin. I can’t look down on an obese person who is walking with a cane trying to do what they need to do. But I do look down on those marginally obese people who could totally lose that weight (Looking at you Miss Surrey 2008) but don’t because they think they are helping other people’s body images. They are just helping other fat people be okay with being fat and not trying to lose weight.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

My lil bro is a big dude, and he says, “You know, I’m a fat mofo myself, so if I see someone and think they’re fat, you know it’s a problem”. He keeps talkin about a dude in his dorm that has to be at least 600 pounds, and travels around one of those Hovercrafts, and he smokes like a chimney, and constantly orders pizza. My brother and his suitemates were actually taking bets on when they think he’s going to die. Morbid asses, but I probably would’ve been casting lots in that pool if I was down there too. LOL

29 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ Esquire…

Okay… so you get “chased” by a bunch of giant water heads in a small college town, whilst at least three thousand other women are among the (lets count the athletes: 40 for football, 15 at best for basketball, 15 maybe for baseball)

So 70 athletes for a college town which should have no less than a population of 6000.

Sorry I’m just thinking logically here.

29 04 2008
maya

I don’t know about height/penis correlation, but I’m standing by my unofficial pseudo-scientific conclusion that light skinned men have small peens, though darker brothas are not necessarily endowed.

29 04 2008
shabooty

the only way a chick should weigh 200lbs is if she’s 7’9″
🙂

29 04 2008
london

you all are killing me…
y’all got ADD?

29 04 2008
SOB

I’ve been lurking n stalking this site for weeks and finally had to post.

Gotta agree with the short ladies in here. I’m 5’2″ and loooove me some 6’2″ and up men. my ex husband is 6’5″!! Not gonna lie though when we would argue I would stand across the room cuz nothing worse than arguing at someone’s chest! And yes he would use my head as an arm rest.

Co-sign on the basketball players…mmmmm they just do something for me

I have a complex bout my height so I stay wearing 4″ heels all day/every day and wont take em off till i get home. Dudes think i’m 5’5″…HA

OT: I hate the mean rude fatties. why u gotta force your fat on me on the train!! I had this one fatty who pushed me up on the window, i couldn’t even turn the pages on my Express paper. So I let the heffa get real, real comfortable and settle her wieght in then on the NEXT DAMN stop I hopped up and was like “SCUSE ME” and made her big ass get all her weight up and bags up and then I put my ass all in her face while I squeezed by. I saw the look on her face…if the heffa coulda ate me she woulda tried right there!

29 04 2008
Lolo

@ Carmen

AMEN!! Ladies, please, it is our duty to keep certain clothing off the bodies of the middle aged. I blame all this MILF and Cougar bullshit that the naaaasty men are passing on. I am middle aged, still clean up half way decent and am still pretty tiny BUT noone needs to see me in the latest from Forever 21 OR any of the junior section.

Handy tip, if you got some baby pouch and encroaching age spots, PUT BACK THE SHORTY SHORTS, THE MIDRIFF TOPS AND THE BELLY PIERCINGS. You are NOT a MILF, you are a sadass woman who is going blind and cannot see how pathetic you look.

Pee Ess, if you think you look like a Desperate Housewife, THAT IS NOT A GOOD THING.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Thanks to SBPH, my go to the bathroom and obsess over my body quotient has increased 30% today. Luckily, I am wearing a shirt I had in high school today (which is fitting better than it did then, hallelujah), bootcamp class is at 7 tonight and I skipped the pizza at lunch.

29 04 2008
shabooty

if it takes you fat bitches the need to cut off a limb to lose 5lbs fast, then please be my guest…OHHHH!
😉
lol

29 04 2008
maya

Re: peens that jab

OMG, I’m about to start a movement against that mess! It is rude! That used to happen to me ALL the time, to the point I thought that something was broken or maybe I was just an asshole who didn’t know what she was doing. It used to make me paranoid upon entry to the point that my legs would be so tense you couldn’t do anything. THEN I read that all that cervix-tapping is due to insufficient arousal. YOU CANT FUCKING CUT CORNERS, GENTLEMEN. The vag doesn’t lie! And the cervix damn sure doesn’t, either.

29 04 2008
SOB

@ Carmen

That happened to me I found this cute top in Old Navy in a small. I wore it to work and this quarter pounder chick I work with had on the SAME DAMN TOP in the SAME DAMN COLOR as mine. I was so mad I never wore mine to work again. Certain clothing is not meant to be in everyone’s size!!

And it’s gettin warm now and if i see one more ‘muffin top’ broad im gonna lose my mind. Your gut should not hang over or stick out between the shirt and the top of your damn pants!

29 04 2008
leoninatl

I used to live in Florida. If I never see another fat ass wearing a halter top, bikini, speedo, tank top, miniskirt, or short-shorts, I will die a happy man. Being the fat ass that I am, I KNOW better.

I don’t miss Tampon Bay at all. Atlanta has its shortcomings, but at least it ain’t the world’s biggest trailer park like Tampa Bay is…

29 04 2008
Pb

Chris,
I hope you exclude Britain when you say that continental Europe doesn’t have that many fat people. I live here and let me tell you, the Brits are gaining (literally) by leaps and bounds. As if being the source of inbred looking, fish-belly white folks with THE MOST JACKED UP TEETH ON THIS PLANET wasn’t enough. You best not ever come to Britain. Your hatred would consume you and you’d implode.

29 04 2008
smileyface631

“Lolo (17:33:20) :

You know when you’re that short your man just uses your head as an elbow rest, right?”

argghh that is so true! i’m like 5’2 or 5’3 and my most of my friends are taller than me. so when were just standing around w/out fail, one of them would rest their arm on my shoulder. at first i didn’t mind but when it started hppening all the time, i would just drop my shoulder so that their arm would fall hahaha

29 04 2008
Esquire

@ Esquire…

Okay… so you get “chased” by a bunch of giant water heads in a small college town, whilst at least three thousand other women are among the (lets count the athletes: 40 for football, 15 at best for basketball, 15 maybe for baseball)

So 70 athletes for a college town which should have no less than a population of 6000.

Sorry I’m just thinking logically here.

@AF,
Actually sweetheart, there are a LOOOOT more members on a football squad than 40. Actually, all your numbers on the teams are messed up. And my school has football, Olympic Track athletes, basketball, baseball, soccer, etc etc..
http://gamecocksonline.cstv.com/sports/m-footbl/mtt/scar-m-footbl-mtt.html

This is a small state. So it really is easy for an average woman here to know, date, see, be related to a professional or college athlete. Columbia SC is not exactly the smallest city in the world, however, there are three major schools, USC, SC State and Clemson, who consistently produce draftees, free agents, bballer, baseballers, and Olympians.

Not to mention the Braves, Bobcats and Panthers all train here in the off season.
Many of the athletes from here have homes and come here during thier offseason.

To name a few who are here on a consistent basis:

1. John Abraham
2. Albert Haynsworth
3. Dunta Robinson
4. Tony McDaniel
5. LaVerneus Coles (who is not from here but follows John Abraham around)
6. Duce Staley (I KNOW he’s retired)
7. Lance Laury
8. Tarence Kinsey
9. Alex English (throw back)
10. Sheldon Brown
11. Adrian Dingle (retired)
12. The Perrys (Micheal Dean and the Fridge)

Im tired of listing and I think you get my point.

29 04 2008
Ethel

This blog and the comments certainly resonate. Its taken me about two years [over 40; borderline hypothyroid] to lose almost 40 lbs. The journey to this point I must say has been very interesting. When I first started, I started to notice on TV that over 50% of the advertisements were for a diet pill, diet plan, exercise equipment, etc. I even tried to track how many in an hour and after about 30+ ads I lost count. But every add goes something like “If you buy this product you’ll get skinny FAST and everyone will LOVE YOU and you’ll be POPULAR!!”

That my friends is utter bullshit. Sure I get support from the folks at the gym [who are trainers] or healthcare professionals. But I have literally lost friends along with the weight because those folks weren’t ok with how I was now looking, and ultimately how they felt about their own weight.

The irony is that I didn’t lose the weight for looks. [I mean, if I were that vain, I wouldn’t have gotten that fat!] I started working w/ a trainer because my cholesterol and bp was high, I was having trouble getting health insurance and was unsuccessful trying to work out and diet by myself. My attempt at health has been called indulgence by some. I look at it along the same lines as: you can’t lose weight for someone else. Nor can you stay fat for someone else. Ultimately your health is your responsibility.

29 04 2008
Lolo

@smileyface

Now that I think on it again, maybe I should get me one of those giraffemen for when I get too old to go down on my knees …

Nah, never mind. When I turn trollface my blowie days will done and I can rest on laurels.

29 04 2008
Ms.Bisonette
29 04 2008
Esquire

@AF: Actually, there are way more than 40 members on a team sweetie. http://gamecocksonline.cstv.com/sports/m-footbl/mtt/scar-m-footbl-mtt.html
And for that matter all your numbers are messed up. There are plenty of players who have homes here and train here. The Braves, the Bobcats, the Panthers all train on SC Campuses. We have several schools that consistenly produce professional athletes, football, bball, baseball, track. (USC, CLEMSON, SC STATE)

Just to mention a few players that are here ALL the time and have homes: 1. John Abraham 2. Al Haynesworth 3. Dunta Robinson 4. Duce Staley (retired) 5. Alex English 6. the Perrys (The Fridge and Micheal Dean) 7. Harold Green 8. Sterling sharpe 9. Lance Laury 10. Tony McDaniel 11. Tarence Kinsey 12. Richard Seymour

The list goes on but Im tired of typing. Its not rare to be a woman here and know, date, tutor, sleep with, be related to, work with, go to school with a man who was or is a pro athlete or college athlete over the height of 6’6. Not uncommon at all.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

leoninatl-I used to live in Florida. If I never see another fat ass wearing a halter top, bikini, speedo, tank top, miniskirt, or short-shorts, I will die a happy man. Being the fat ass that I am, I KNOW better.

Bwhahaha I use to live in Jax Fl and goddamit the black women down there were some hotmesses at the damn beach good lord. Like shoulnd there be a weight limit on bikinis LIKE WTF!!! I once saw this big assed big breasted big bellied ass yellow weave wearing black chick in this barely there bikini top with the short shorts on unzipped. I wanna know who told her that shit was cute so I can personally get his or her has clipped.

29 04 2008
Esquire

Disclaimer:
Chris’ blog obviously hates me, why cant I post? If those posts show up later, I am not mad and enraged, I just cant see my posts or somethings wrong….

29 04 2008
lisaturtle

@ creativecat

“It’s even worse than it used to be because all of the fatasses bitched about not wanting to be a size 300 so now extra-smalls fit like mediums should.”

This idea makes me feel good. WHY? BECAUSE STORES KEEP MAKING BRAS SMALLER (i see you Victoria’s Secret) so that small boobed bitches think their boobs are bigger than they are and will HAPPILY drop $48+++ on a bra when they could take their 32A/34B ASS TO TARGET AND GET ONE OF THOSE WACK ASS SUPER-PADDED BRAS! UGH! There is no reason I should have to buy most of my bras online because in most stores the DD has turned into a C/D and don’t tell me I’m wrong… I’VE HAD HUGE BOOBS MY WHOLE LIFE. I AM THE BOOB EXPERT.

29 04 2008
Esquire

Test

29 04 2008
Esquire

AF : I cant post my response for some reason god damnit

29 04 2008
The Cruel Secretary

@ Muse (19:20:02)–“I need my penises to stay under 7 inches seriously. The last thing I need is a hysterectomy while having sex.”

*dead*

@ Mrs Epps (18:41:52)–And then I met my man who is 2 inches short than me, a little chubby but not noticeable,manly chest hair…”

…you know, chest hair can be used as a…ahem…sex toy. ::smiles wickedly::

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

@ Ethel, I appreciate your words. Taking care of one’s health goes for anyone skinny or fat.
@Mrs. Epps – Jacksonville, oh god. Beyond hot mess! They still wear Jheri curls down there, don’t they? I have family there and try to visit once/twice a yr. Everybody looks like some kind of zombie; maybe it’s my ‘accent’ that scares them. I could never live down there, you absolutely NEED a car for everything.

29 04 2008
leoninatl

Mrs. Epps- Jacksonville?! I’m so sorry…

I think they still wear Jheri Curls in Memphis too…

29 04 2008
brran1

@ Knat: Jheri Curls?!?!?

29 04 2008
lisaturtle

And I’m sorry, size does matter. I mean… I have tried to give the less impressive dicks a chance but no matter how great his “motion” I still would take up a less skilled larger penis over smaller skillful homeboy. I don’t understand women who say otherwise. I tend to assume they’ve fallen in love with some tiny-dick man who’s otherwise wonderful. No it doesn’t mean I want MANDINGO to leave me without the ability to walk but I’m saying… size does mattter.

29 04 2008
brran1

*Starts singing* JUST LET YO SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUL GLO BABY. FEEL IT. OH SO SILKY SMOOTH. JUST LET IT SHINE THRU YEA. JUST LET YO SOOOOOOOOOOOOUL GLO…. SOUL GLO

29 04 2008
Lolo

@lisaturtle

Shut up about my 36B loving wackass padded bras, you boobie having, DD owning, bra EXPERT. Wydoncha put a pic of your boobies if you’re gonna be all bragbragbrag, huh??

Actually I love the Lejaby and LaPerla bras but you know, food and shelter come first in the budget. Wah wah wah.

29 04 2008
Esquire

ooooh damn you @AF!!!!!!!
The Gods are with you. I cant post what I want for some reason. Lets just say…there are way more people than 40 on a team, just for the record. but also in sc the braves, bobcats, and panthers train on our campuses. USC, Clemson, SC State yearly produce Olympic and pro athletes. The state really is packed with big tall husky black AND white kuntry boys. I was trying to give you a short list of th athletes who reside here on an off season basis but my attempts at posting were in vain. maybe if I do it this way: John abraham laverneus coles (who follows john around) dunta robinson tony mcdaniel albert haynsworth, richard seymour, tarence kinsey, adrian dingle, duce staley, micheal dean perry, william “the fridge” perry. you get the point

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA@Soul Glo YES! And you D-cups, *sigh*, how do you deal? All ya need is a handful! I’m a full 35B, I LOVE IT. I can wear a button-up top and not have to safety-pin it, I sleep on my stomach, I can jump, I can wear a grey top and not worry about boob-sweat, and I can go braless. *evil laugh*

29 04 2008
Esquire

WOO HOO it worked.
whew.
all I was trying to say was that it is not uncommon in this state to go to school with, know, date, sleep with, have a baby by, be related to, get pulled on in the club by, have them running you down in the grocery store by a big tall ass 6’6 and above monster man who is a college athlete, professional athlete, or track star. (well they arent that tall)

Damn you ADMIRAL!! I usually like you but you have caused me stress trying to post in here.

damn damn damn damn james

29 04 2008
benjie

i havent been a b cup since i was pubescent.

it was almost immediate at 13, i shot up and out.
D cups all around.
now i have to practically strap them down so i can run.

good sports bras are hard to find

29 04 2008
AfricanGirl

I LOVE VOICE OF REASON! MAKE YOUR OWN BLOG MAN…I’D BE TOTALLY YOUR GROUPIE!

FCUKING FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!

29 04 2008
indigo.royalblue

@knaturalbeauty, i totally agree. i’m a B-cup and i’m perfectly satisfied 😉

29 04 2008
Seven

@ Esquire – glad you got that post out! I understand where you’re coming from I attended UGA and your post earlier about being chased took me back to undergrad! Ah, to be young with little responsibilities surrounded by country cuties 🙂

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ SOB- Hmm. Really? Unless it was a tube top or something bare….did she really do you an injustice? Don’t shop at a store that makes sizes XXS-XXL if you don’t want to see someone who is not your body twin in it, LOL. It’s not about who rocked it smaller or even who rocked it best. It’s about did YOU rock it well? If she looked so bogus, maybe it helped you look better?

No man is sitting up talking about “she look good in that shirt, but then that big girl had it on too and I was like ‘never mind’. ” Me thinks you guys are overcompensating for some other stuff here, cause I could give two fucks about really big girls or really skinny girls.

Maybe I should start complaining when some flat chested biddy* wears a shirt like mine. Tell her she is deprecating the value of the twins.

*-No offence to the flat-chested biddies, I like breasts of ALL sizes. I am not a lesbian, just a breast woman. I find them facinated.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Ouch. FacinaTING.

29 04 2008
Sister Toldja

U good, LOLO. Y’all get ALL the pretty bras. I have went through no less than 5 of the same yawn-lacy jawn in the past three years. And I refuse to wear granny bras or cotton.

42 DD= BOGUS. I am a 38DDD now, but I am still having the worst time buying bras.

29 04 2008
Muse

Bras are a bitch to shop for. I’m a 36-D (I measure 35 but sometimes I will buy a 34 depending on the cut of the bra) and a lot of these bra places are not true to size. I do like La Perla because the bras are of high quality and fit very well. I use to be a big fan of Victoria Secret but the quality of the bras have gone down.

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

“Maybe I should start complaining when some flat chested biddy* wears a shirt like mine. Tell her she is deprecating the value of the twins.” – Sister Toldja AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Do breadcrumbs ever fall down there? At least those big bras can double as purses. AHAHAHAHAHA.
|you know I’m joking|

29 04 2008
Muse

Heheh Africa Girl you might have to wait in line. It appears that Chris already has a groupie following.

Man what if blogs can be used to get booty.

29 04 2008

okay i have a fatty story.

I live in an apartment, my neighbor above me is 400+ lbs.
I hear his every step (most of which are from the living room to the kitchen. ) It drives me nuts. Then the fat mofo buys a dog and I hear this pitter pattering as mut all night as well.
So on a bright saturday morning I am listening to music on my couch and I feel like the world must be ending. I immediatley pray to the heaven’s for fornicating the night before, I repent of all my sins and then I wait with my eyes closed tight. I peek out of one eye and there is no fire. I pay close attention to the nose above me.

I figured it out.

This damn sumo wrestling ass wheel barrel is playing catch and run with is dog.
I wanted to kill his crunch n munchin ass that saturday.

29 04 2008
letinstar

you guys are killing me…i ain’t gonna lie, i need to lose 25 pounds and i’m working on it…since my job just went to india two weeks ago, i am currently looking for a job…in the two weeks i’ve been without a job, i have already lost 10 pounds…and thats by not going to dunkin donuts and starbucks every morning…i have been eating organic fruits and veggies…i just bought a stepper, so now i’ll get the cardio in…one thing that has always troubled me is seeing very obese people in the stores that look like they have butts for bellies…i told myself i cannot and will not end up like that…

29 04 2008

try finding the 34D BRA’S. I HAVE THE WORST LUCK! IF SOMEONE HAPPENS TO FIND ONE WHEN BRA SHOPPING SEND IT MY WAY!

29 04 2008

@ MUSE
I thought I was loosing my mind. Victoria Secret has gone down hill, it’s like buying a target bra now. None of the bra’s are pretty+comfortable anymore.

29 04 2008

smh @ loosing i meant losing

29 04 2008
Muse

Ne, We probably wear the same bra size. Check out La Perla, Norstroms, and believe it or not Wonder Bra makes some good quality bras that are true to size.

29 04 2008
Lolo

Well any of the flatties might know this pain. Those little “helpers” they put in the push up bras so as to smoosh the girls together? You ever have those things “migrate” and then realise that your titty is all cockeyed? Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, it takes some major self confidence to play that off. “Oh look, my girls are rioting down there and throwing out the fakers. Damn.”

Now I just either make sure they’re well and truly in place or just strap on a “all in one” smoosher. Shit, if I were twenty again I would just go braless but erm, over forty that is just not done unless you’re Goldie Hawn or one of those other skankies.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

@ ne, I remember when I was a 34 D….I’m a 32 DD. Naturally. As in, the girls don’t want to stay at chin height on their own. I just grew into this size (lost weight but gained boobage) so I’m not sure what to do because Victoria’s Secret doesn’t carry them and I’m creeped out by buying bras online for some reason.

I would kill to have smaller boobs. I can’t go to the gym without strapping them down and even then they go all over the place. I swear, if I had enough money I would start a company that made sports bras for women with BREASTS not mosquito bites.* And if you buy them in your “size” (large, extra large) the band is too big but I can’t buy according to band size because the cups are too small. Why hasn’t anyone figured that out yet?

29 04 2008
Lolo

You know what? It IS a man’s world. Why don’t men have to buy their drawers in scrote sizes, right? “I wear a 5 3/4″ CCC and maaaaan, you don’t know how hard it is fit my nutsack!!”

Now someone needs to get on that, guaranteed moneymaker right there.

29 04 2008

thank you muse! and not blonde you may just have to order your bra online. You must have a TINY frame with big ole hooters!

29 04 2008

Men should have periods in the afterlife. lol lolo.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

LOL. Yea…I’m shortish too, 5’5″. My two sisters and I have huge knockers. Got them from our aunts. My big sis and I have tiny frames like our mom and the little sis got the larger one like my aunts.

And dudes who go to hell should have periods. Nonstop periods.

29 04 2008
Lolo

Victor’s Secret and their new line of Nutbras. I’m telling you, MONEY.

29 04 2008
brran1

@ Ne: We have them now. During the exact same time womenfolk get theirs.

Symptoms: Sudden (worse than usual) addiction to ESPN or even The Discovery Channel., Sudden lack of hearing (counters your need to yell and slam doors), Insta-odor (something we smell in the air to stay at least 5-7 feet away from you at all times when on your period for fear of arguments and fighting), and my all time favorite: Quick Dial (We both know you’re not cooking a damn thing. I have to eat don’t I? *dials local delivery spot* )

29 04 2008
Lolo

Alright, thank you to everyone for the laughs, now I have to go and beg YT to vote for Obama for a while so this made me good to go.

One last thing.

Size DOES matter, both ways. I don’t know anyone who wants a thumb sized dick in her business but some of us just get scared by the humongcock is all, that could leave you permanently distorted and then where we gonna be? All chasing after those occasional monster dicks. After all, if a man tosses his lil acorn into the Grand Canyon noone goes home happy so it’s all about compatibility now, isn’t it?

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

I leave for an hr whippin up some dinner for later and back back to reading something about…

leoninatl-Mrs. Epps- Jacksonville?! I’m so sorry…

I think they still wear Jheri Curls in Memphis too…

DEAD hell yea those mother fuckers still rock the curl so sad…

and

Knatural-@Mrs. Epps – Jacksonville, oh god. Beyond hot mess! They still wear Jheri curls down there, don’t they? I have family there and try to visit once/twice a yr. Everybody looks like some kind of zombie; maybe it’s my ‘accent’ that scares them. I could never live down there, you absolutely NEED a car for everything.

Hell yea girl I had to get a car asap because when I 1st moved down there i was living with my aunt who really lived in the damn country where there were no goddammed sidewalks and street lights and stop lights. I’m like wow.Dude down there are no joke though…but what i enjoyed most was back when i was a pot head they had the bomb as trees and parties liek everydamn night!!

Cruel Secretary-you sooo nastyyy but i know what you mean about the chest hair being a sex toy muahahahha

and oh yea..

lisaturtle-This idea makes me feel good. WHY? BECAUSE STORES KEEP MAKING BRAS SMALLER (i see you Victoria’s Secret) so that small boobed bitches think their boobs are bigger than they are and will HAPPILY drop $48+++ on a bra when they could take their 32A/34B ASS TO TARGET AND GET ONE OF THOSE WACK ASS SUPER-PADDED BRAS!

DEAD!!!!!!!!!

36C right here!!!! and loving it. Perfect size handfuls my man says hahahah I dunno what I would do if my boobs were small. I would cry? My sister from another mother who is basically my twin but she has small B cups and she gets so pissed that i have bigger boos than her hahah. I dunno what i would do if I had bigger boobs..cry? I dont need back problems Im straight on that. Buying bras online is a lil weird but shoot do what you gotta do sometimes.

29 04 2008
Carmen Sandiego

No, what I’m trippin on is going to the gym.

The gym is a place you go to LOSE all that winter fluff, correct?

Then tell me WHY people are out there SHOWING OFF THE MUFFIN TOP.

I weigh 125 and I wont squeeze into a spandex outfit. WHY WOULD SOMEONE DO IT IF THEY WEIGH MORE!!???

Sorry. This is a sore subject for me.

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

Yea, I don’t do the spandex either. I usually go with yoga pants and a tank top.

I don’t wanna buy bras online :(. Oh well. Nordstrom has good bras for bigger boobs, you say?

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

lolo-You know what? It IS a man’s world. Why don’t men have to buy their drawers in scrote sizes, right? “I wear a 5 3/4″ CCC and maaaaan, you don’t know how hard it is fit my nutsack!!”

At the funeral getting burried ahhahahaha

29 04 2008
NotBlonde

I think poor Chris wonders why his blog comments section gets hijacked by chicks talking about sex, bras and scrote sizes.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

NotBlonde-I think poor Chris wonders why his blog comments section gets hijacked by chicks talking about sex, bras and scrote sizes.

Totally agree..he’s proably at home by now reading the comments shaking his head saying “These funny horny bitches I need one of them”. hahahah

29 04 2008
Carmen Sandiego

Haha, we all hope so, right?
What woman on here isn’t half in love with him?
…Not that I am, of course. *cough*

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

@Mrs.Epps – Then the next topic should be randonmess, that way we’ll remain on topic

29 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

*randomness

29 04 2008
creativecat

Sister Toldja said:

Um, while vanity sizing is real…..if you shop at the children’s store, you are just really thin. Extra smalls are still…extra small, lol. My BFF is a size 2 and she is very slim, and curvy. I don’t think her clothes would be a medium anywhere but a third-world country experiencing a famine.

I’m not that thin–just that short–5 feet even.

Lolo said:

A small girl, between the height of 5′2 and 5′5, in the weight class of 95 to 105 pounds, who could, nay SHOULD, be placed upon your penis and spun around in a sexual act.

Does it work if the girl is smaller than that? ; )

Admiral Furious said:

I just don’t understand a woman standing at 5 feet even saying she doesn’t want a dude who is seven inches taller than her. It doesn’t make much sense.

Um, sorry?

LisaTurtle said:

This idea makes me feel good. WHY? BECAUSE STORES KEEP MAKING BRAS SMALLER (i see you Victoria’s Secret) so that small boobed bitches think their boobs are bigger than they are and will HAPPILY drop $48+++ on a bra when they could take their 32A/34B ASS TO TARGET AND GET ONE OF THOSE WACK ASS SUPER-PADDED BRAS! UGH! There is no reason I should have to buy most of my bras online because in most stores the DD has turned into a C/D and don’t tell me I’m wrong… I’VE HAD HUGE BOOBS MY WHOLE LIFE. I AM THE BOOB EXPERT.

I feel your pain on the bra buying. Small band and large cup=no fucking way you can buy a bra for less than $50–if you can even find the correct size. These are the only thing I can’t buy from the kids department. Fantasie is the only brand I’ve found that even makes my size.

I doubt that’s a vanity sizing thing on the cup size though. Most women would prefer to think they’re a C cup than an A or B.

Ne said:

try finding the 34D BRA’S. I HAVE THE WORST LUCK! IF SOMEONE HAPPENS TO FIND ONE WHEN BRA SHOPPING SEND IT MY WAY!

Target sells them.

29 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

hahahah knatrual helll yeaaaaa! I liek that topic..randomness

29 04 2008

I can’t wait to see who he see’s on the bus tomorrow.

29 04 2008

**very aware that “see’s” isn’t a word.

29 04 2008
The Cruel Secretary

Okay, I try to get back to the topic…see, I don’t have an issue with fat people. I dance salsa, and some of the best dancers are the fatter men. (Hell, I even have a crush on my supervisor, who’s a big man, too. I’m plotting ways to get him to take salsa classes so I can eventually dance with him.) It’s all in how it’s carried and how s/he dresses it.

What I can’t stand are skinny dudes with beer guts. Just no on that ish. The jerkiest ones are those who got the guts but want to run their mouths about women who gain a few pounds.

Damn, where’s Don Cheadle, so I can rub on his man pelt…

29 04 2008
storme

its funny, because reading the title alone i knew this one is going to sting.

ouch.

and thats an ouch coming from someone who is overweight but not even remotely as big as the people you’re poking fun at.

being overweight sucks. period. and the last thing i needed today was another reminder of how big people (whether theyre 400lbs or 200lbs) are just not welcome. chances are, if uve met a fat person, theyve gotten their fair share of insults, leers, and jokes in their day. its never pretty.

anyway, thanks for…well, nothin. 🙂

30 04 2008
Natalie

@brran1

Yes! The Old Court Metro Station, haha.

30 04 2008
imaG

Lol fat people get love too 🙂

http://www.anythingblack.net

30 04 2008
SOB

@Sista Toldja you right. I got my back up when she personally stopped by my damn desk to compare how we both looked in the damn top. I was feeling some sorta way cuz i have officially been on ‘deflated’ status since i had surgery a year ago. I used to rock the 36C lovely and filled out all the tops and now I’m a 34B. Nothing worse than saggin little boobs!

@lolo

that happened to me with the ‘little helpers’. damn things keep sliding and moving.

30 04 2008
scarletjones

For all of the larger up top ladies that need bras, i have just joined the D club since having my baby, and i now know what all of my busty friends were really complaining about. I did find some relief in Walmart of all places. Fruit of the Loom has decided to get a pretty & colorful line of undies and bras that go all the way up to 40DD that i’ve seen (now i’m in Oklahoma so that might explain the availability of larger sizes – cuz they got some big mo’ fo’s up in this state!) and to top it off the highest price i paid was $10. Now for those that have objections to shopping at wally mart i can’t do nothin for ya.

tres cheers for tig ol’ bitties!

30 04 2008
NotBlonde

@scarletjones

My troubles come from finding the DD size with a small band that actually supports. Bras that come in 32 DD are usually not very supportive; i guess they figure if you are that small around and your tits are that big, they must be fake and therefore not need that much support. Oh well. I’m going to Nordstrom as soon as I get paid 😉

30 04 2008
maya

“Well any of the flatties might know this pain. Those little “helpers” they put in the push up bras so as to smoosh the girls together? You ever have those things “migrate” and then realise that your titty is all cockeyed? Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, it takes some major self confidence to play that off.”

I have the same size boobs that I had when I started growin the fuckers – though now they’re a little fuller, but clearly I’m a 32A – and anything bigger on me would look ridiculous, painful and offensive. Smooshing is something I don’t even bother trying to do…I have a thing about clothes that need instructional help to get into…my boobs like to just chill, and I can’t get with all the reconfiguration just so my boobs can do a fake-me-out that isn’t faking out anyone, and moreso making me self-conscious.

@ ST – cosign on the fascination, but I think it’s just cause I don’t really have them. But, for that matter, don’t really want them. I feel like they’d make me too hot and just generally annoy me. Even now when I feel them shake, I’m bothered.

I

30 04 2008
Angry v3.2b

While I see where the anger is directed toward (general laziness), I don’t exactly agree in full. Some people are genetically predisposed to being large, but they work hard to make something of it or to change (offensive linemen).

Either way, can’t say I agree with this one, and that’s a first, so that means you’re doing great!

30 04 2008
ph2072

I haven’t read the comments, but I bet that you’ve pissed off a lot of fat people. This post is abso-fucking-lutely hilarious.

30 04 2008
ph2072

Forgot to mention – the sight of overweight/obese children bothers me a lot. It’s not healthy at all. And it’s increased exponentially over the past 10 or so years. Ridiculous. Their parents should be thrown in jail with Bubba or Big Bertha.

30 04 2008
Tasha

You missed one. Fat skinny people nothing worse than a fat skinny person
you know
the ones with the pot belly
flappy arms
cellulite thighs
wobbly chin, no neck and head fat (you know the double triple folds in the back of the head of bald dudes) but with chicken legs and tooth pick arms

i mean really
us fat people work pretty darn hard at being fat
it takes years and years of good solid eating, sitting and resting to get the proportions right
for cushioned resting of course

then here comes some ‘skinny person’
all outta porportion looking like a backwards upsidedown question mark
like someone who did leg lifts but forgot to do situps
now how’s that for lazy?
couldn’t lift the scooper for a few more pints of ice cream with those trembly arms?
man up! a few weeks power opening the fridge door should take care of that
it’s a lack of commitment i tell ya

i also blame half assed diet products
having a diet pepsi with your mcdonalds will not make you healthy
just say eff it and supersize that damn coke at least your belly will match your ass
skim milk in your coffee with that muffin will not magically make that cellulite go away matter of fact the fat in the milk may just add some fat to round out those dimpled thighs and possibly compensate for those knobby knees

if ya gonna do it go all the way folks!

30 04 2008
Beautifldreamr7

@Lady (14:53:07) Co-sign!! Lovely how her post was completely overlooked. Gotta sit this one out because it will be full of hypocrisy and it will make me load my guns. Though it’s good to know that everyone will be happy if I turn it on myself since FAT PEOPLE DO NOT DESERVE TO BE FUCKING ALIVE!!!

Looking forward to a new post.

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ SOB- Girl, I am telling you….thin-yet-opague tops with no bra!!!! Own the IBTC membership! Let me live through you! You can do sit-ups on the incline bench without your boobies wrapping around your neck= blessing!

At least you can wear empire waist shirts! 😉

Obese kids- saddest thing EVER. I work with kindergartners and I have a darling little boy who must be 150 pounds. He is so cherubic, so cute and so sweet. But when he sees the tiny ones jump in my arms, he is so quick to try and say “pick me up too!”. I didn’t want to make him feel bad the first time and I did it. Then, I died.

Can I say that today’s post saved me from pizza and one of my BFF’s from Mrs. Fields cookies? AND ensured that we did not BS in the gym today, despite the aroma of a man straight outta Funkytown?

30 04 2008
SOB

@ Sista Toldja – I looked down at my little flapjacks, went to the kitchen and baked me a damn chocolate cake! I’m eating for you while i wipe these crumbs off my lip.

Aight you got me on the bench…you’re right. With my IBTC CARD I don’t need no damn quadruple-strap, triple-wire, dent in shoulder bra! HA

As far as the obese kids it makes me soooo damn mad. I live in a large mexican community and these little kids and they mama’s are rolling their asses to the school bus. I mean what the fuck are they eatin at home!? There’s a 6th grade GIRL at my daughter’s school who looks, walks and sounds like a NFL linebaker. She scares me.

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ SOB- mmmm, flapjacks….it’s cool, the spinach and artichoke salad I had for dinner was greeeeeat. No, really. These are tears of joy I’m crying, no, really!

Can you put some Cool Whip on that cake in honor of your buxom Sister T? I’ll jiggle my boobs at a cop tommorrow, just for you, K?

When I taught 7th grade, I had a ‘linebacker’ girl as well. It was so sad, because she was such a bright, cute girl. Class president, well liked. Eff a promdate or junior clothes, this baby is gonna have diabeetus by 15 if her parents don’t check that ish. Sadly, momma and daddy were big too and they didn’t seem to be interested in changing any of their habits. I was out once with a friend and her boo, and we saw the family (this was after I had left the school). My friends boo yelled out “She’s HOW old? She’s big as HELL!” Thank God she didn’t hear. Broke my heart.

30 04 2008
Quiet Storm

Lindsay: “…I also hate when bigger people sit next to me on the train (part of the reason I don’t sit anymore) and look at me like I’m supposed to move over to give them more room.”

Son! Im no twig, but the same thing happens to me! And when I “accidentally”  hit them with my bag or my knee, they want to look at me wrong and breathe even harder on me. *shudders* I especially hate when I am on the plane and I always end up the middle seat squeezed in between two huge a$$ ppl. WTF!

leoninatl: I heard that the shack in the West End by Queen City (a strip club) is pretty good too. I know a couple of friends that would get their catfish and fries (or chips). whateva the hell they called it. My fam is from the Caribbean, so all I cared about while I was in the ATL for college was finding some Jamaican food. When I was able to hustle someone for a ride, I had to go allllll the way to Stone Mountain for it! It was far as hell, but I came back to my dorm a satisfied customer!  Good thing it was far and I didn’t have a car. I would probably look like blimp.

Sista Toldja: “Sit and spin- man is on his back, woman is on top and rotates. And you don’t have to be short to do it! Just agile.”

I first heard about this a while back when it was thoroughly described in one of Zane’s books. I could not get that visual out of my head for a week. *fanning myself*

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ Esquire…

Thanks for clearing up the proper numbers… I’m glad you did your research.

However I think you completely missed my point. I put the numbers out there as estimates to negate for the possibility of shorter men playing: Running Back, Corner back, Quarter back, Pitcher, short stop, second base, and point guard. If you don’t think that short men play those positions, please read my post earlier about the sports I played. Needless to say the ratio of athletes to women is completely disproportionate. That was my point.

Sorry you missed it.

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Also… I’m just giving you shit for your post boo.

😉

30 04 2008
AfricanGirl

Come on guys! Fat people need more love.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
(and less food).

30 04 2008
NotBlonde

Fat skinny people bother me too, although there is one variety that I just don’t understand. The fat on top, skinny on bottom people. They are like, boxes of flesh set on top of spindly legs. How does one do that exactly?

30 04 2008
AfricanGirl

P.S.

ONLY IN AMERICA:

30 04 2008
Meka

Could someone help me understand, please? I am sick and tired of seeing fat rolls hanging over the top of pants especially jeans. I went to college with this chick who wore too small jeans and shirt. Man, I saw her belly roll er’day. But anyway…I have a few questions and observations:

Question 1: Why do all fat chicks claim to wear a size 16?
Question 2: Why are fat chicks always calling someone else fat?
Question 3: Why do all fat chicks who hang together (aka “herd of cattle”) always argue about who is bigger?
Question 4: Why do fat chicks love love LOVE little men?
Question 5: Why do fat chicks think that a size 16 in “regular” clothes is the same as a size 16 at Lane Bryant?
Question 6: If you are obese, do you really need to eat in public?
Question 7: Why are fat people always ALWAYS talking about the weight that you’ve gained notwithstanding the fact that they are 5’3″ 200lbs and you have gone from a size 4 to a size 6?

Now, I do have a theory about the size 16 claim. Ya see, size 16 is just over the border in Fatland, thus, giving the illusion that one only needs to cut out a snack or four to get back to Regular Weightland. But that is just my hypothesis at this time.

I was on a CTA bus and this chick took up 1 1/2 seats. Oh but she was steadily shoveling that Garret’s Popcorn in her mouth.

I come from a big family but I have one cousin who is quite large. For real. Real. Large. She is about 55 years old and has been fat her entire life. My mother asked her if she had thought about weight loss surgery and my cousin says (get this shit) that she want to lose the weight naturally! WTF!

Growing up my Moma used to ask us to shoot her if she ever got obese. She is now complaining about gaining ten pounds although she is not fat (but she is not height-weight proportional). I told her if she gained one more pound that I was taking her fat ass outside and putting her down. No joke.

True story…I was having dinner at Golden Corral a few years ago (I know…please don’t take my EBP card). Two gargantumongous women came into the restaurant. One woman was so big that she couldn’t walk and was in a wheelchair (okay, I don’t know if that is really why she was in a wheelchair but I am going with it). But her friend was the worst, the absolute worst. This chick was so big that her belly (aka “FOP,” “cooter belly,”Dunlap,” etc.) was swinging between her knees! I wanted to throw up…so gross.

30 04 2008
london

my people…
bras… i know it’s true that you lot cannot find great bra’s over there.. my mother sends bras over to nyc for my aunt and cousins..
you all should make a trip here and stock up..
and your bra should not give you ‘back fat’ you know that upper back wodge of flesh. i loathe fear that more than anything in the world…

fat skinny people.. i work with someone like that… skinny and wobbly is not a good look. my bmi is probably less than hers…

fat people buying clothes… just because it is avail in your size.. doesn’t mean you should buy it…

anyone buying clothes…. be clever about it.. the mannequins in the store and in magazines do not represent the ‘normal’ human frame… dress for your shape..
always check the back view of anything you wear… invest in a 3 way mirror

big bones… dense bones yes.. big bones do not exist..

am looking forward to my bus journey to work.. lots of lard arses in all colours wearing the most inappropriate shit…

30 04 2008
Grimm

Even people who claim to be “thick” are fat these days. Being that I do fit modeling from time to time, I can say that many sizes are actually marked two sizes up. So no, you dont wear a 6. You wear a 10. Designers did it so they didnt have to carry plus sizes because women are so fat. I wear a 00 which iscrazy. They should not have had to create that size so that people who wear a size “8” (read 12) could still shop in regular stores. Go to the gym!!!

These “thick” people are also the biggest haters ever. Im 5’10 and have never weighed more than 120lbs. No. I am not dying. Yes i do eat and no, i do not have to work out. I also do not have an eating disorder. These”thick” people created the whole eating disorder watch in the media to make thin people feel bad because they dont have cellulite or rolls. I think most people could stand to lose 30lbs.

In Japan they dont even make clothes big enough to fit these people who think they are thick, but wedding dresses are the most accurate. If you think you may be in denial about being fat (i.e. 5’4 130 or 5’6 160 or more) go to a bridal shop and try on your alleged size. ou will hopefully have an epiphany when you try squeezing into that “6” but end up in the plus size section.

30 04 2008
Carmen Sandiego

5’10 and 120???

How do you even STAND?

30 04 2008
Yonnie3K

Due to yesterday’s tirade, I have to be careful about commenting on this blog from work. Fuck ya’ll! The yt man signs my paycheck!! However, there is much that is comment worthy:

Fat people ARE bad for the environment. Again, I must thank you for your insight. Fat Bastards!! They are fuckin’ it up for everyone!!

Am I the only one that noticed that somebody made a comment that referred to Laila Ali as plus sized? WHAT about her is plus sized? (btw, I’m a fine 5’4″, 145 lbs. for reference)

Chris, a guy who says that he knows you were husky as a kid is “creepy,” but a gang of female cyber stalkers is not? I’m just sayin’…

Also @ Chris’: “I will neither confirm nor deny allegations of my one inch penis.” Jesus wept. Twice. (whoever said that the other day had me dying!!)

youporn? Yet another reason I have to be careful about reading this at work…and I WILL NOT go to that website b/c I am dying of curiousity to see what is on there.

The only woman that I think is more beautiful than Jill Scott is Jada Pinkett Smith. Even if you are not a Jill Scott fan – never heard one song by her – if she is coming to a town near you, GO SEE HER!!

8 and 9 inches?? Fuck ya’ll. I am not tryna be walking around with a bladder infection messing around with that. I’m good.

My last boyfriend was 6’5″, 320. I’ve never had a “type” before (light skin, dark skin, etc.), but after that, I don’t think I can go back below 6’0.

Seriously…is youporn people’s amateur porn on the internet? Foget it. Nevermind.

30 04 2008
NotBlonde

5’4″ and 130 is fat to you Grimm? I’m and inch taller and about that weight and am a little bit below “normal” looking weight. 5’4″ and 150 is fat, 5’4″ and 130 is “average” build, I’d say.

30 04 2008
lisaturtle

You mofos are crazy.

@Lolo, you go girl… ROCK YOUR PADDED BRA. As for showing mine, there’s pictures of my cleavage all over the innanetz! LoL.

@NotBlonde… MY BOOBS ARE MY #1 REASON I HATE WORKING OUT. SERIOUSLY. I played basketball in highschool and I often looked RETARDED because I’d wear a real bra under my sports bra. Now I do a bra sans underwire with a real bra over it. This usually keeps them mostly in place as I run baywatch style on the treadmill. Seriously, I hate going to the gym and visibly seeing people watch my big ass boobs bounce!

As for the 5’10 120lbs… Either you ass is lying or you are rail thin. I’ve been 120 lbs. and damnit, I looked super thin and I’m only 5’6.25 (well, 30 of that was probably in my boobs but still…).

To my whoever is said they’re a 36c, I HATE YOU. I MISS WHEN I WAS A 36 C… 7TH GRADE WAS A GOOD YEAR. *Sigh* How I did not appreciate my womanly body (lol) but what 13 year old would?

30 04 2008
trinity

its crazy…you know…some things some people have said on here are down-right hateful…while its great that everyone expresses their opinion, take some responsibility for what you say…there are heavier people who read this blog and sometime with self esteem issues a hateful word can push someone over the edge even if not directed at them…

as i think of what to say im at a loss for words…but i leave with a thought…how would you like it if someone pulled out your personal 1 flaw and broadcasted it for for the world to see, discuss and berade…i have a submission for things black people hate: people that dont think through the things that they say before they say them…

because if this was anything else you all know…it would be a whole different story be it racial, sexual preference, or any personal flaw that hits home to you 🙂 have a blessed one all

30 04 2008
Takara on fat people « Phatstuff

[…] 30, 2008 by Eggplant Sure enough. Takara says it about as straight as anyone […]

30 04 2008
dynamicdiva

“You ladies go on ahead with your giraffe fetish but I’ll just keep on over here with with a guy that I can slow dance with and not look like we’re at the junior father/daughter dance.”

Um, thanks for this. Too dayum funny! I can totally relate. I am 5’10 and my husband is 5’11. I have never understood why tall men gravitate to short women!

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Grimm- “Im 5′10 and have never weighed more than 120lbs. No. I am not dying. Yes i do eat and no, i do not have to work out. I also do not have an eating disorder. These”thick” people created the whole eating disorder watch in the media to make thin people feel bad because they dont have cellulite or rolls. I think most people could stand to lose 30lbs. ”

Do I need to even make a comment? The “thick” people created the eating disorder frenzy? BWAHAHAHAHHAHAH!

Don’t feel bad about being anorexic, at least you are Creole and pretty!

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

^^^^ Sorry, that was mean. But if overweight folks are gonna get shit, then we need to give to underweight people too!

“According to your height of 5′ 10″ your ideal healthy weight is 156 pounds. Your recommended weight range is between 139 and 173 pounds. ”

Damn girl, do you even have nipples?

30 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“Being that I do fit modeling from time to time, I can say that many sizes are actually marked two sizes up…Im 5′10 and have never weighed more than 120lbs…i do not have to work out.”

Seriously…this is me right now.

Waiter, I thought I ordered a side of grace with my beauty…

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Meka- You are definitely right about a size 16 in Lane Bryant being different than a Gap or Old Navy or ‘designer’ 16! It’s also very different on a woman of 5’2 than it is a woman of 5’9. A tall woman in a misses 16 wouldn’t be in Fatland if she were well proportioned. A munchkin in a Lane Bryant 16 may want to rethink some choices in life, LOL.

You know what pissed me off? In Baby Boy, Mo’Nique’s tittyless ass told Jody she was a “real woman” and a size 16. GTFOH! She was a 24 if she were a day.

30 04 2008
SOB

@ Grimm – Hold up. 5’10” and 120 lbs? You got to be kiddin! I’m 5’2″ 120 lbs and people keeps asking me why is my head larger than my damn body. I drink ensure for weight gain and eat 7 meals a day. I lost my cleavage, ass, thigh and hip action! You sure your bones aren’t about to snap? That’s some famine shit right there.

@Sista Toldja – nipples? HAHA Using a sharpie to draw them on

30 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

“Being that I do fit modeling from time to time, I can say that many sizes are actually marked two sizes up…Im 5′10 and have never weighed more than 120lbs…i do not have to work out.” – Grimm

ewww.

30 04 2008
Quiet Storm

lmao @ the link Africangirl posted. I cant believe it. Just when I thought I pretty much saw it all, I see this. What state is that fitness center in?

30 04 2008
scarletjones

Do we really need to talk about the issues that the fashion industry stirs up with clothing sizes. I don’t care where the hell i go, i can’t find a consistent jean size in ANY store. I’ma be real…. i got a BIG ass. always have since being a young girl with bony arms legs and a huge hump. I’ve never been able to buy the same size pants from any store. It used to be that i only had to work within a 3 size spread. now i’m working within like a 5 size spread!

and @ Grimm, honey please stop saying silly things to imply that you have body issues. anyone that would assume that a person that wasn’t a size 8 or smaller should have to have a specialized store to shop in obviously needs a reality check.

30 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

grimm-your 5’10 and weigh 120 pounds..that kinda sickly..not hating but thats not was up..

come with me i’ll buy you a cheeseburger..

30 04 2008
madd scientista

i’m not a Mo’Nique fan in the least (in fact i can’s stand her and most of her followers) but in her defense, breast size (and penis size) is based on heredity. it doesn’t matter what size you are, if you’re genetically pre-determined to be an A cup (or 4 inches) you’ll be an A cup (or 4 inches). although breast size may vary a little with weight fluctuations and pregnancy but it’s usually within a cup.

it’s the same with men. just because he may weigh 400+ lbs doesn’t mean he’s packing a mammoth-sized dick to boot.

30 04 2008
Jai

Ok… so I’ve just been a lurker since I found this site about a week ago… but I just had to say…. uhmm 5’10 120… EEEEWWWW.

30 04 2008
Grimm

See? That is exactly my point about “thick” people…. Sizes ARE alot bigger to accomodate you so that you dont have to shop at Lane Bryant. It may be “normal” to have a size 32 waist-and the cancer and diabetes risks associated with it, and there is also nothing wrong with having a 23 inch waist. It looks great with my 36 inch butt.

To Sista Toulja- I do have boobs, although small, and I have a shape. They are proportionate with my bod. If they got any bigger than a 34 B id look like a Barbie doll. I am in the lower end of my weight class.

I dont need a burger, but if you feel i should eat take me to a steak house. steak is my fav…

Its hard being thin because most women arent anymore after puberty. Its not right to pretend like being thin=sick. We do exist. If you don believe me and you live in NYC go to Abercrombie on 5th Ave and come see us (thats where alot of us work between castings). I rally do think people just say those things to make themselves feel better about that extra 30 they cant lose or how uncomfortable they feel on the beach.

30 04 2008
Grimm

And by the way, Im also alot younger than many of you are… Im sure I’ll put on more weight now that I’ve entered my 20’s, but for now im happy with my size.

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Grimm, thank you for helping to save me from my “thick”ness. See, everytime you write something, I throw up. I’ll be a 23 inch waist in no time.

30 04 2008
benjie

“It may be “normal” to have a size 32 waist-and the cancer and diabetes risks associated with it, and there is also nothing wrong with having a 23 inch waist.”

well…i’m bedfuddled.
there are cancer and diabetes risks with having a 32 inch waist?
or are you just saying that to justify the fact that you weigh as much as a fetus?

30 04 2008
SOB

I don’t understand it. I’m trying to visualize this and it’s not working. I’m a size 2 at 120 lbs and i’m 5’2″. so what size are you wearing at 5’10”? A negative 5? I’m not mad at you i’m just befuddled.

last time i checked you can be at risk for cancer no matter what size you wear. cancer doesn’t have a weight class or a BMI.

30 04 2008
Jai

Grimm (15:14:52) :

See? That is exactly my point about “thick” people….

I’m not thick… 5’10 120 still sounds gross…

30 04 2008
Grimm

at ST-you are hilarious girl.

To everyone else who needs help visualizing my size, here is a photo of my fav Ethiopian model Liya, the fig 3 picture on the Ethiopian post. She is my same hieght and weight. Does she look sick???

http://www.style.com/peopleparties/search/slideshow/person489?iphoto=4

30 04 2008
Grimm

at Sista Toulja- you are hilarious…

To all who cant visualize my size here is a picture of Liya Kebede, figure 3 in the Ethiopian post. She is my height, weight, and nearly the exact same measurements. Does she look sick????

http://www.style.com/peopleparties/search/slideshow/person489?iphoto=4

30 04 2008
Grimm

to Sistah Toulja- you are hilarious.

To all who cant visualize my size, why dont you google Liya Kebede- the model from figure 3 in the Ethiopian post. Does she look sick???
She is my same hieght, wieght, and nearly the exact same measurements… Or you can just o to style.com and sift through all of the model photos.

30 04 2008
Lolo

Okay everyone, back offa Grimm. Been there myself, actually and she is still a teenager (it sounds like, or pretty close) and she’s still got that teenaged metabolism. Also, if she’s working in the fashion industry than she is pretty much “normal” for most of those girls. When you got folks telling you that you need to thin down to fit into the sample and you’re already sporting kneecaps that are bigger than your thighs … you lose your bearings. As long as she’s not living on lettuce or puking up her yogurt then this is a bodystage that she’ll naturally age out of.

Having been there myself I know what it’s like to have someone snark you for having a collarbone or such and it only reinforces the hate of our own bodies.

Just be healthy and proud of what you work for is all.

30 04 2008
Grimm

I tried to post a link but VOGUE owned photos are impossible…

30 04 2008
benjie

yeah i thought about that after i posted my comment.

age plays a factor
the fashion industry plays a (huge) factor

so health is the most important thing.
and whatever weight makes you happy is the one that you should maintain.
its all about being comfortable in your own skin.

30 04 2008
Grimm
30 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

People aren’t jumping on Grimm because she’s thin; they’re doing it because she’s being pompous about it.

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

@ Lolo- I know, and teenagers are the most annoying, impossible people in the worrrrrld! J/k

Seriously, there is probably nothing wrong with the way she looks and if she is a model she is *sadly* expected to be underweight. But her little skewed view that EVERYONE ELSE is huge, and that the world created eating disorders to make everyone who’s big feel better about herself….that’s nuts! Anorexics and bulimics deserve better than that, cause those are legitamite illnesses.

You can’t represent .03% of the female population sizewise and then tell everyone else that they are the ones who are wrong. That’s just as bad as Mo’Nique telling the “skinny bitches” off.

30 04 2008
Muse

Grimm…Um 5’10 and 120 is NOT healthy. Even most runway models at that height are around 130lb…Jesus when I saw your post, I envisioned at concentration camp….

30 04 2008
Lolo

You guys are right, but I felt a moment’s twinge at wanting to pinch the snot outta her skinny ass is all.

Carry on, Grimm really could use a dose of SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HOW SUPAH YOU AND YOUR LIFE IS ALREADY.

Seriously, ABERCROMBIE is your standard?? Have you seen the freakness that is the CEO of that shit? Fuglyass YT and his boyslurppin, bone popping, frankenface owning, albino ape shufflin’ hunk of execrement needs to get plowed under and then the earth salted so that he never rises again.
http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2006/01/24/jeffries/
Talk about the dog’s dinner. My dog would yelp in fear and then run under the bed if he saw that face in his bowl.

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Ladies and Gentlemen I present to you the model that Grimm was talking about

Now Grimm, you claim she does not look sick? We all know that the camera always adds an extra ten pounds to people and therefore requires the thinnest of thin to people to look even moderately normal. IN the picture I posted above, that girl looks like she hasn’t eaten in four months. Her clavicle is more than apparent and her arms look like they are simply bones covered by skin.

If you look like this, Grimm, you would probably break to pieces if I pushed you down a flight of metal stairs. That size is NOT normal. And if you believe it is… you need counseling.

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

OKAY… NOW I’M PISSED…

Gentlemen of this thread… let me ask all of you this?

Would you rather have a bony chick who has no shape or form to soften the thrusts during sex or would you rather have a woman with some shape (not obese)?

That should settle that argument really quick.

30 04 2008
brran1

@ AF: Id rather have the curvy chick.

30 04 2008
Lolo

Admiral,

Erm, that is pretty much my body type too and well, I’m not sick and I could easily put you through some serious pain if I ate some Popeyes first.
Grimm doesn’t need counseling, she needs a career that isn’t dominated by folks who look like this http://www.hotelchatter.com/files/admin/anna_roger.jpg and this http://www.sybarites.org/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/lenotre.jpg and this http://www.webwombat.com.au/lifestyle/fashion_beauty/images/d-versace-2.jpg

Okay, she does need counseling …

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Lolo that last link…

The woman to the left looks a god damn hot mess.

I’m sorry… if you’re that skinny you need more than just the Popeyes chicken. You need some biscuits. I’ll be happy to try the metals stairs test on you as well. 🙂

30 04 2008
Lolo

Meet you at the top of the stairs after I finish my chicken, biscuits, hush puppies and some greens. I’ll be the skinny bitch slinging shoes and the Kama Sutra at your short ass.

30 04 2008
Grimm

If men didnt like thin women we would all be single. Trust me, men are attracted. I get defensive because it is mostly black people who taunt you for beng thin and perpetuate the non plausible argument that we are all sick and unhealthy. I was 5’8 in the 8th grade and I didn’t start weighing 100lbs until my junior year, so I know all the fatties were hating because I still eat 1lb of See’s Candis milk almond chocolate a week and stay eating steaks and dont gain wieght. Some ppl really are naturally thin…

to AF- you are so mean man. I am not bony. my measurements, like I said are almost exacly Liyas, but my hip is 37 which makes my butt too big for many jobs, but since I dont work out i wont be losing it anytime soon. No, she does not look sick. She just doesnt have fat arms like the ppl you are used to seeing… lol

to ST- the majority of the “real women” who make up the “normal/average” range (something like 5’4 140lbs which is over wieght because 140lbs is in the high end of the BMI for someone 5’7) are moms. Like 40’s and 50’s. Young people ARE fatter than ever. To be like 20 or 30 and wiegh that much is bad. Its overwieght. And like I said, most black women are 30bs overwieght.
Many people are thin, esp Asians, and I see them all the time. They are the reason I can never find an XXS or a 00L.

to Lolo-hahahaha Mike is scary. VERY scary. He is a rascist sexist bastard, but he pays us $100 to take pics with customers so I can look at him all day long… I used my other side job A&F as a place where people can see us in our habitat. the 5th ave flagship is VERY diff than your average mall abercrombie. All of the store models are real models and do castings/media for the company. People say they havent seen ppl who look like this. Im saying that there are many and you can find us there, in soho at castings, around 34th during FW, and on model night on tuesdays and wednesdays at clubs.

30 04 2008
Grimm

at lolo- Karl Lagerfeld is hilarious. Have you heard what he said about fat people and why thin isnt a problem? He hates fat peopleand kids so he and Chris could be besties if it werent for the fact that Karl hates socializing because it “bores him to death”…

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

Lolo… how tall are you again…? Thats what I thought.

Grimm… (sigh) If you work out your arms would not look as though you came from an impoverished country. Come on… give it a rest. Just because your hip frame is wider than those of other models doesn’t mean that you’re normal size. Ever model that I’ve seen looks like they have eating disorders… and I’m almost certain that you’re in denial that you don’t have one.

30 04 2008
Lolo

Admiral,
I’m not short, I’m PETITE goddammat. grumblefuckingwrongwithyou …. Women are petite, you males have to live with “short”, bwahahaha, etc.

30 04 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

Is it wrong that when I think of Lolo, I get an image of Ling Ling from Drawn Together in my head?

She’s so extra spicy, dammit.

30 04 2008
Lolo

Grimm,

You do live a life in a world that is desperately lacking in reality, you know that, right?

I mean, I know it may seem all gritty after the plasticity of LaLa but there’s an entire country of folks who shop, eat, dress, party and live lives that have zero to do with the freaks that sign your check. You might want to keep that in mind for the day that you get sucked dry by all those zombies.

30 04 2008
Lolo

@Chris
I’m tucking that LingLing shit away for future revenge onya fancyass.

30 04 2008
Admiral Furious

@ Lolo

Okay Shawwty… 😉 Its all love.

ON ANOTHER NOTE!!! I AM STILL TRIPPIN OFF THAT GOD DAMN COW/BULL AT THE TOP OF THIS PAGE. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

30 04 2008

Aww poor grimm, she will be on a n hbo special one of these days.

I like how she feels 140lbs is over wieght…that’s cute youngin’. The fashion industry isn’t what’s real honey! especially when there are models like kate moss and all the other million models doing drugs and drinking everynight. It’s not normal to wear 00L dear!

IT’S NOT MY OPINION IT’S A FACT THAT SEEING YOUR BONE MORE PROMINENT THEN YOUR FLESH, IS NOT NORMAL.

You feel like that shit is normal because of the industry has told you that it’s normal. The blood sucking money hungry DRUG ADDDICTED designers who get a face lift a month ( but is secure of who they are) are telling you the shit is normal. LOOK AT JANICE DICKINSON HONEY. THAT TRICK ISN’T NORMAL.

You may be naturally skinny, and my advice to you is if you want to make a name in the fashion industry, pave your own way… set your own standards, hustle and keep get some tough skin.

AND QUIT CALLING THICK PEOPLE OVER WEIGHT!

30 04 2008

**BONES

& Lawd, why oh why am I addicted to this site?

30 04 2008
Grimm

at AF- what you keep saying is my point. Just because you arent fat does not mean you are sick. People were NEVER as big as they are now. People who come from places without high fructose corn syrup are alot thinner than women are today. Maybe thats why heart problems are our biggest killer. 30 years ago a size 6 today was a 14. Imagine how big a 2008 size 14 wouldve been back then. Have you seen how big a large is??

So what if i dont have huge man muscles or alot of body fat??? Its not right that its socially acceptable to taunt thin people and make them feel bad for being thin. Eating disorders do exist, but many of the people who have them arent that thin, they are pudgy white girls. You only see the emaciated ones on TV. And the most common one is obesity. More than half of all black women are at least 30lbs overwieght. Maybe thats why we die so early…

At the end of the day, youre entitled to your opinion and so am i. Thats why this blog is so much fun, and its ok that no one ever agrees with me. But i refuse to follow the pack and be in denial like all of the lazy fat people who claim they are “healthy” because they wear a “size 6” (read 10). If they were really ok with their shapes cellulite cream wouldnt be such a high seller

30 04 2008
Sister Toldja

Lolo- You are NOT my starship! How could you post that picture of Mike Phillips at the lunch hour???? He looks just like http://www.negativschnitt.de/eric_stoltz/assets/images/t_mask1.jpg

Grimm- Most Black women are 30 pounds over weight and you are 30 pounds under. Maybe you could get a chubby best friend and do the Jack Sprat routine. But the last thing you should do is criticize someone’s weight, so long as they aren’t morbidly obese or competing for your illustrious career as Abercrombie and Fitch’s Next Top Model.

So, is it the 50 year old moms that are driving the average weight up or the 20 year old fatties? You said both. And no one said you weren’t a “real” American woman.

http://www.informatics-review.com/FAQ/reading.html

You are DEFINITELY a real American woman!

30 04 2008
Grimm

at Ne- being 5’4 and 140lbs is overwieght. Look at a chart in a doctors office. Every hieght has a range of 40lbs or so and a highest and lowest. i.e. if you are 5’6 the lowest wieght would be 110lbs and 145lbs is overwieght. Thats why I said that many “thick” people are at least 30lbs over. With all of the eating disorder crap i hear and jealousy i get from girls who cant eat like i do because theyd look like a house i had toask my doctor. I am fine. I am healthy. And you should wiegh 150lbs unless you are around my height.
And like I said before, a 00 was created because designers made sizes two bigger i.e. a 6 is really a 10 because sizes go by twos. This is because strores didnt want to create plus sizes but still wanted to accomodate the expanding waist lines of ppl in the States. In Japan they dont even make a large. The Japanese equivilant of a US XXS is a XS. That should show you how fat we are by comparison.

30 04 2008
knaturalbeauty

Grimm – 5’4″, 140lbs. is overweight? Doesn’t muscle weigh more than fat? That same chart says 5’10”, 120lbs is underweight, doesn’t it. Not sure. But, I’m 5’3″, 132-135, but I’m muscular (no not body builder muscle). And SPBH/Chris is right. You’re being asshole-ish about it.

30 04 2008

What charts are you looking at sweetie? Dr. Karl Lagerfucks? fuck outta here. I work with one of the BEST cardiologist in northern california hun and our charts beg to differ. I am looking at a chart right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

30 04 2008
scarletjones

@ Grimm – Japanese people have some of the worst issues of self-esteem and there’s a very high percentage of eating disorders there among young women. I’ve lived in Japan and I know that it’s exactly how you describe with clothes, but a phenomenon being present in a community doesn’t make it healthy either. They also have a very high rate of suicide which i believe is all wrapped up in the issues of personal reputation and the obscene pressures to meet all of the standards of beauty, education, and achievment that are tossed around in that country.

Eating garbage and living an unhealthy lifestyle will catch up to you whether you’re under BMI or over. I have a friend who’s father is rail thin and was shocked when he found out he had diabetes. The problem i believe that people are having is that it’s clear in your statements that you have a biased view of what is considered unhealthy and fat. weight in and of itself doesn’t tell you about your overall health, but just as you don’t appreciate statements about thin people being sickly it’s just as ignorant to imply people with weights over the BMI are sick as well.

We just all want you to have a personal attitude about body image that is more healthy and more informed. Especially given the fact that you are in the position to “represent” the black community in the fashion industry.

30 04 2008
D

My Goodness… I am speechless… I found someone who despises this more than I… aaaaaaaaaaaaahahahhaha. Wow.

Um, your anger, well, how do I say this? It inspires me to go out and stand on a corner and SMACK sandwhiches out of peoples hands…

It makes me want to start a water aerobics class (b/c “bigger” people can’t jog, with it being bad for the knees and all, of course).

It makes me want to burn down all the McDs, etc and open up Jenny Craig Vegan-Sushi-Lactose-Glucose-Free Carry Outs… (that’s what you call them down there right?)

I’m out of ideas for now… I’ll leave this to you.

30 04 2008
kablammyman

Americans need to hear this shit for their own good. Kudos!

People, how hard is it to do something physical every day? How hard is it to take care of your one and only body?!?!

30 04 2008
Sylph

Grimm, I want to shake you and then buy you a burger. I get that there is a “standard” within your industry to look a certain way but truly that standard is not healthy. Kudos to you to be able to go through life without any worries and everyone looking at you because you’re so thin. It also might be that they wonder if you accidently trip, you’ll shatter into little pieces.

I have a cousin who was around your dimensions when she was 18 and she looked so emaciated. Regardless of her style (and she knows her shit), the clothes did not complement her body.

As for anorexia, it’s not only pudgy white girls that go through it. Because of the prevalent images seen, it affects just about every race now. (You also shouldn’t leave out the anorexic males. They have them too.)

I stated earlier that I’m 5’8 and 153lbs. I am by no means overweight. You can throw out all the stats for my liking but realisitically, women don’t fit that ideal. Because I’m on the tall side, I look thinner than I should which means that you must look like a walking skeleton.

30 04 2008
zoso

I agree. Particularly if women are active in sports, the BMI charts can pretty much go out the window. As it’s been said before, muscle weighs more than fat.

30 04 2008
30 04 2008
Mrs.Epps

goddamn Grimm must be like 19 or somehting because she is totally missing the picture. I am 20 and will be 21 in november I am the same fuckin height as her and weigh a good 35-40 pound more than her. AND I am FAR from fat or overweight because if I were you would see rolls every where possible. hahaha Grimm your not a little girl anymore grow up and get some meat on your bones and guess what? No one is jealous of you at all so stop giving yourself a big ass head. No real grown woman wants a body of a 12 yr old boy like 95% of these runway models which is not even the ideal woman. So do us all a favor and eat some shut the fuck up with cheese. that is all… 🙂

30 04 2008
Shine

Dang why is there always one person on the site that interrupts the excellent comments on sex and porn with their foolywang. Then everyone gets caught up trying to correct their hardheadedness. I miss the sex…

1 05 2008
GuessWho

Oh my!!! LOL LOL
LMAO LMAO

This post is so wrong but yet so right….lol lol

Chris, you spoke on behalf of about 80% of skinny/regular sized people…..

I hate when I see a fat person order the whole world at a restaurant….Highly disgusting…{At least make an effort!!!!!}

2 05 2008
Esdotto

I going to put double hate on fat people in the military. how can you defend America if you can’t run a quarter mile… down the block?! here’s the answer, you can’t!

2 05 2008
Esdotto

One more thing…

Yonnie

“8 and 9 inches?? Fuck ya’ll. I am not tryna be walking around with a bladder infection messing around with that. I’m good.
My last boyfriend was 6′5″, 320. ”

HE WAS 6’5 and had a dick SMALLER THAN 8 inches? i assure you i’m hetero and don’t go around checking out other dudes dicks, but i would guess that a guy that size should be packing. am i wrong?

btw, i’m 6’3 =-]

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

i agree Esdotto to a point.. because my man is 5’8 and is packing like he shoulda been 6’3 hahaha

2 05 2008
rocksteady

sheesh mrs. epps

we get it. your husband has a large penis. hes good in bed. you get laid every single day. comprendemos. sheesh. you hate on grimm for flaunting when you choose to inform us about how AMAZING your sex life at every opportunity. not a good look sweetie.

2 05 2008
scarletjones

super co-sign @ Esdotto! as a military brat myself, i used to find it crazy that people would wait until it was time for evals to try to get their weight together, like they don’t know that there is a weight requirement for their job! wtf?

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

rocksteady-sheesh mrs. epps

we get it. your husband has a large penis. hes good in bed. you get laid every single day. comprendemos. sheesh. you hate on grimm for flaunting when you choose to inform us about how AMAZING your sex life at every opportunity. not a good look sweetie.

1. who in the fuck is rocksteady?
2. He or she must be Grimms friend
3. Umm when did i ever say anything about what goes on in my bedroom?

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

goddamned newbies..

2 05 2008
stuffblackpeoplehate

“1. who in the fuck is rocksteady?
2. He or she must be Grimms friend
3. Umm when did i ever say anything about what goes on in my bedroom?”

Sweetie, you know I love you and I am on your side…but you have indeed made quite frequent reference to the impressive nature of your fiancee’s mocha sperm rocket and the very frequent pleasure you’ve derived thereof.

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

Chris,
Oh ahahha oh well get the fuck over it! 🙂 that is all!

Regards,

Mrs. Epps

2 05 2008
Lolo

@scarletjones
My dad was Army and then AF for life and he did that nonsense. He was haffa moke (hawaiian) and would bust down to make weight on popcorn and diet shasta or grapefruit and hard eggs, truly stupid diets. I know it helped to ultimately kill his heart because talk about stressing your body … drop thirty to forty pounds in several months or less, on a regular basis, and you know your heart just can’t keep up with that.

He was a Big Man and could carry his weight so it didn’t seem like he was FAT fat but the weight would have to go when it came time for evals. I have major issues with my overweight friends and I will tell them that they’re setting up for early massive system failure.

2 05 2008
Esdotto

Sorry about your father…

to clarify where i stand
1. i think we all agree there are healthy ways to lose weight
2. i was talking about obese people in the military that are not physically fit. I know a few “heavy” (read: not obese) people that can physically perform. I am not talking about them.
3. obesity cases in the US are rarely due to thyroid or other physical problems. all i’m saying is if you want to eat hard, sit on the couch a lot, and live a blob’s life, refrain from signing up to fight for uncle sam. i’m not trying to be divisive, being physically fit is part of the job description

2 05 2008
scarletjones

@ Esdotto – i completely agree.

@ Lolo – i’m sorry about your dad too. my mom was guilty of the last minute loss as well sometimes. but as she got older it made more sense to just maintain all year long.

2 05 2008
The Devil

OK. Everyone here who knows me knows I don’t date fat chicks, so lets get that out of the way. I am most certainly biased, but only when it comes to those chicks with whom I have to share a bed, shower, motorcycle, or meal.

That being said, the fat vs skinny vs healthy argument in the US is completely screwed up. My bro has it 100% correct. We need to walk and exercise more often.

As far as skinny chicks, Victoria’s Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio is 5′ 10″ and weighs 112lbs, yet appears likely pass The Admiral’s metal stairs test. (see pic in link below)

Be happy, healthy, and look good naked, but don’t brag about it (talking to you Ms. Grimmy).

Squander your health, or act too pompous, and you’ll have to contend with The Devil sooner or later…

– The Devil

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

The Devil-OK. Everyone here who knows me knows I don’t date fat chicks, so lets get that out of the way. I am most certainly biased, but only when it comes to those chicks with whom I have to share a bed, shower, motorcycle, or meal

speaking of bikes which do you guys think is better black Harley or some ninija sport bike…persoanlly i love a man who rides a real man bike a harley…MMM yesss..I think i secretly wanna be a biker chick minus the old gray long haired big bellied bandana wearing white dude heheh..** looks back at when I rode my 1st harley** HEAVEN…

2 05 2008
Mrs.Epps

yes i said “nini”ja bike

2 05 2008
Sister Toldja

Dippin on ya ninja Honda with Tanisha and Rhonda, WHAT!

Yo, I am gonna be screwed in the AM, but I am doing my hair and nails and using my Pedi Egg(as seen on TV, copped at Walgreens and dubbed a disappointment at my house).

2 05 2008
Nice

I’m from the home of the Harley, so Ima roll with that.

2 05 2008
Lolo

Ah yah, the Pedi Egg is not the way to go. I got one of those battery operated pedicure tools (sorta like a mini sanding tool, yikes) and it was well worth it (wait for the sale/coupon at your local Ulta). Using the sander and one of those denture brushes to scrub at my feet helps to make my stompers smooooth enough for warm weather.

Hahahaha, okay. I’m stopping before we go off on more girly tips around the males.

2 05 2008
blackberry molasses

I love how so many people on seem content to bash and make blanket statements about people who are larger than what you consider to be average then have the nerve to assume some moral superiority for not being one of those people.

You f***ing sanctimonious assholes.

I wonder how the people who have ‘feet that look like claws’ or ‘pizza face skin’ or whatever other thing that makes people self- conscious would feel if they had their personal issue held up in harsh light for other people to incessantly mock and pass judgment upon.

Granted, there are a plethora of health risks associated with being overweight– anyone with half a functioning brain cell should know this. What is worse is that we live in a culture that makes it so incredibly easy to become a fast-food- face- stuffing, mush-bodied couch potato. Nobody is disagreeing with all of you who talk about these people (except for maybe how evil some of you are being)– especially the ‘fatties’ who appear unwilling to be able to do anything about it. I even get mad as hell at these people– mainly because they make me look bad.

Ladies, you know how you get pissed off when some moron tries to kick it to you with a tired ass line and gets mad when you look at him all screw-faced? The reason this happens is because at some point, that line went over on some less-discerning chick. So he naturally assumes that all women should go for it.

Same idea when you make blanket statements/ harbor assumptions about people who are of larger size (e.g. they eat nothing but greasy ass food, never exercise, see nothing wrong with their state of living, etc.).

Therefore, people like me have these assumptions made about them.

Ok, now I ask you to indulge a little bit of hubris in the next few statements.
I’m actually much healthier than many ‘skinny’ women I know (and they’ve told me this).
I run/bike about 30 miles a week
I play volleyball every weekend
I train 5 times a week with a personal trainer
I can’t stand the smell of most fast food joints, let alone eat in one of those places
I limit my consumption of “white” starches (potatoes, refined sugar, rice, bread, etc)
Some people would kill for my BP/blood sugar/cholesterol numbers.
I guess I’m “heavier” b/c I have a large amount of lean muscle mass– and people seem to know (since I’ve seen it iterated here in one form or another) is that muscle weighs more than fat (NO, I DO NOT LOOK LIKE A FEMALE BODY BUILDER–eww).

The impetus for doing all of this is NOT vanity– Its common f***ing sense. My father (even though slender) has diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol and had a pulmonary embolism 2 years ago. My mother’s sisters all had hypertension when they were pregnant and none of them were what you would call overweight when they were pregnant. Although I’m proud of my family and their accomplishments, this is one thing I would rather NOT emulate.

The reason I say the above is not to somehow prove that I am better than anyone else… I’m just saying that since we brown people have enough bullshit to deal with that is associated with something we cannot (and do not) want to change (our lovely brownness), you may want to think carefully when you criticize/mock people who you think of as ‘other’ than you.

peace,

the retrospect

2 05 2008
Fat Freakout

My eyes! My eyes!

Forget the health issues. That’s a personal matter. People have the right to kill themselves.

Assaulting our eyes in public is another matter.

2 05 2008
Fat Freakout

Hey, some of us men (me, anyway) think that a lot of female bodybuilders are very sexy.

2 05 2008
blackberry molasses

that’s… probably… because you are a closeted gay man…

syke, i’m just playin….

but not really…

2 05 2008
Esdotto

i’m sure he’s not talking about the roid-y ones… but then again, he might be. which means you’re probably right.

19 05 2008
DJStylus
8 09 2008
studentheadh

university ibm wood student sun tree land yahoo tom yes

4 10 2008
Proud FA

Stop by and learn about fat acceptance.

20 12 2008
joe

this is def iqnorant and a sterotype about all fat people. like this literally is the most iqnorant thinq i have ever read. talkinq about fat people like must realli make u feel qood inside huh ? yea ur def a douchebaq.

30 05 2009
Big Natural Boobs Porn

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9 06 2009
starts to rub her pussy

starts to rub her pussy…

HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!! This asian babe has got some big ol’ titties on her! She literally“ pops” out of her bikini as she’ s sitting by the pool and DAMN! As she pulls those things out you can just imagine sliding your cock in between her big boobs! She …

14 07 2009
justin igger

Pound sand you fucking piece of shit. If the fucking Europeans did any work, they would be too tired to walk everywhere, bringing on the fatitude. $9.00 gas? You have no concept of how this world works or how your assistance check is funded. Shut up and quit trying to run the world. If laziness is next to weightlessness, how come the blacks are so goddam fat?
Get a job or shut up.

31 08 2009
shesadandy

I have nothing against fat people and I think this was mean in a way.

But I can’t lie…when he said raise gas prices to 9 dollars and then to Melt the fat people? I fell out laughing!! I surfed on hear by accident but I’m glad I did. This is TOO FUNNY!

18 09 2009
ron

what the hell this racist bull crap. black people dont hate fat people if you not black or dont have a black person with you while you type this then shut the hell up bout it you pathetic wannabe KKK loser. see it people like this that makes the world a worse place then it is. they dont have lives so they spend all their time trash talking about people,races, and whatever else they think is a big idea and the people that actually argee with this guy has more issues then him. damn yall some sad people also…..OBAMA IS BLACK, MY LAMBO IS BLUE!!!! BLACK PRESIDENT FOR THE 1ST TIME W000T!!!

18 09 2009
ron

ALSO BLACK PEOPLE NOT THE ONLY FAT PEOPLE IN US. WHITE PEOPLE ARE ALSO FAT YALL JUST HATING ON BLACK PEOPLE CAUSE YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO DO BUT GO BACK TO SLAVERY TIMES. STUPID IDOITS.

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