Abraham Lincoln

27 03 2008

lincoln4.jpg

Figure 1: Owns neither comb nor razor

Abraham Lincoln is a fucking asshole. Yes, he delivered the Emancipation Proclamation and freed the slaves. So fucking what? Doing so was politically and militarily motivated, and he’s still a racist fucktwat:

“I will say then that I am not, nor ever have been in favor of bringing about in any way the social and political equality of the white and black races [the crowd applauds] – that I am not nor ever have been in favor of making voters or jurors of negroes, nor of qualifying them to hold office, nor to intermarry with white people, and I will say in addition to this that there is a physical difference between the black and white races which I believe will forever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality. And inasmuch as they cannot so live, while they do remain together there must be the position of superior and inferior and I as much as any other man am in favor of having the superior position assigned to the white race.”

-Abraham Lincoln, 1858

Several years later, after Pharaoh softened his heart, he delivered this little tidbit:

“It is also unsatisfactory to some that the elective franchise is not given to the colored man. I would myself prefer that it were now conferred on the very intelligent, and on those who serve our cause as soldiers.”

-Abraham Lincoln, 1865

Sho izz mighty KINE o’ya massa ta fix’n let dem niggaz wit da book learnin’ vote, yess’a sho nuff iz! Fuck you very much, asshole. Abraham Lincoln hates black people and he really REALLY hates Indians. If John Wilkes Booth wasn’t a racist assclown himself, I’d spill a 40 in his honor.

wilkes-booth.jpg

Figure 2: My homeboy, as long as I’m willing to delude myself…

I’ve met a lot of white people who get pissed off when blacks seem ‘ungrateful’ for the things some of them have done for us. Now, these white people know they can blame Abraham Lincoln. It’s not that we don’t appreciate the things you do, it’s that we don’t trust you. It’s the same sentiment that a girl in a bar has toward a guy that buys her a drink. She appreciates the drink, but she’s pretty sure that his sneaky ass is up to something (and he almost always is).

jaidziewczyny.jpg

Figure 3: Smile! You’ve been Abe Lincolned!

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59 responses

27 03 2008
london

and if you believe this…made all the worse by:

Abraham Lincoln was our 16th president from 1861 to 1865. J. A. Rogers quotes Lincoln’s mother, Nancy Hanks, as saying that Abraham Lincoln was the illegitimate son of an African man. William Herndon, Lincoln’s law partner, said that Lincoln had very dark skin and coarse hair and that his mother was from an Ethiopian tribe. In Herndon’s book entitled “The Hidden Lincoln” he says that Thomas Lincoln could not have been Abraham Lincoln’s father because he was sterile from childhood mumps and was later castrated.

as taken from a site called 5 black presidents…

27 03 2008
Uhura

Wow…

27 03 2008
london

sorry got the name wrong…

http://www.geocities.com/cureworks1/5blkpres.htm

5 BLACK PRESIDENTS
From the Book
Black People
And Their Place In World History

27 03 2008
Machete

Hmmm… dunno ’bout him being part black… his huur looks kinda straight (aside from that kinky beard) and I know they didn’t have perm back then.

27 03 2008
Mr. Smith

I never understood why people put Lincoln on such a pedestal. His intention never was to free the slaves because it was the right thing to do. So Lincoln was nothing but an Uncle Ruckus….

This country better make sure I NEVER become a history teacher, because their lily white version of history is going to be challenged at every single turn. I’m loving the term racist assclown too.

27 03 2008
london

a black/white mixed child can have any hair.. from bone straight to the tightest curl, from blonde to black and all things in between….
we know some light skinned blacks opted to pass in white society…
some light skinned blacks had societies just for light skinned blacks… something like the blue veins? correct me if this is the wrong term…
they only married each other…
nothing surprises me…

27 03 2008
shabooty

whatever, long as a lincoln gets me 5 table dance rounds, imma love that man.

(:

27 03 2008
Machete

Wow shabooty, your masterful grasp of everything crass never ceases to amaze me.

27 03 2008
Angry ver. 3.2 (Beta)

Shabooty’s icon is a Surge logo. I rest my case.

27 03 2008
Machete

@london
True dat, although most of the mixed kids I’ve run into seem to have their black genes winning in the hair department. Whoa, a humid day is my worst nightmare.

27 03 2008
Mr. Smith

BTW, VERY interesting find on the 5 black presidents. Don’t see too many pictures of the early presidents unless they were painted and old photos could have been shopped for the presidents’ liking (no i don’t mean photoshop, I mean the real, manual deal that the whole photoshop idea comes from).

27 03 2008
london

living in england.. rain is the fear.. my locs can take up to a day to dry if i am caught in a heavy downpour…
mixed kids are becoming the norm where i live… all shades of skin, hair and eyes…
my gorgeous little god son although mixed is ‘white’ with black straight hair. it only curls if it gets long… you’d have to look at him really really really hard to see any black at all.. most people including my black friends do not realise until i tell them..
and lord the looks i get walking down the street with him in my arms…
old women are mean as hell…

27 03 2008
Ethel

Interesting, and a great example of the story of the bird being removed from horseshit by a cat, who then eats it…with the moral: Those who get you out of shit isn’t necessarily your friend.

27 03 2008
london

huh? you’ve lost me ethel…

27 03 2008
Machete

@london

My analysis of Ethel’s phrase…

bird == blackfolk
horseshit == slavery and whatnot
cat == lincoln

27 03 2008
Mr. Smith

No no I know exactly what Ethel is saying. Just because Abraham Lincoln’s actions eventually led to the freeing of the slaves, doesn’t mean we should be forever grateful. It was never his intention in the first place. It was

1. Convenient because of times of war called for more soldiers ready and willing to fight. Who more willing than a black man guaranteed is freedom for fighting in the war?

2. Benefited the North/ The Union as a whole. The economy was takin a stomp to the nuts because of the war and needed a quick fix to get it over with.

So yes, I’m free at last hallelujah. Lincoln is not my savior because he was also no the only president who made that promise to blacks during times of war. Jefferson Davis made that promise to the southern slaves as well as blacks being promised equal citizenship for fighting in the world wars.

27 03 2008
london

*dead*

27 03 2008
london

ok.. am back..
thanks for that mr smith and machete…
ethel… yes i thoroughly agree…

27 03 2008
Johnny O

WOW!!! I never read that speech in history class here in Idaho. That’s crazy, thanks for opening my eyes. I guess politics have been consistent over time (Obama not hearing racist remarks from his pastor, Hillary under sniper fire, and McCain flip-flopping on everything) Truly unbelievable.

27 03 2008
london

?? johnny.. what do you mean..
you didn’t know this..
am i from london more familiar with your history than you?
i mean the things that actually happened in your history…

27 03 2008
Johnny O

London, you probably are. The English are usually history buffs. When I was in high school and college, the only thing we learned about Abe Lincoln was that he was a champion of civil rights. Guess not. Thanks Chris, you burst my Abe Lincoln bubble. Chris, having Native American blood in ya, you’re probably a big fan of Christopher Columbus too, or is that another post!!!

27 03 2008
Johnny O

I love the explanation of Figure 3. That killed me.

27 03 2008
london

cool…
but..
firstly i am afro caribbean.. then maybe british now that black football players are allowed on the pitch in international games but i am not and never will be english…
we love history yes.. it is a long one which is inexorably tied up in yours…

27 03 2008
lisaturtle

London,
I think Johnny O was trying to say, here in the U.S., if you don’t look for this information you will probably never know it. Our official history books used for education are full of all sorts of lies.

27 03 2008
Johnny O

London, my bad lol. I just figured it as where you are from not your name, sorry about that .

27 03 2008
london

apologies johnny o.. i must be confusing you… i am from london in england i was born there… just not english… british is the most acceptable term… afro caribbean if i am filling out a form…
london is my tag.. it’s easy to remember!
lisaturtle.. it’s the same here but times are a changing.. well in saying that our ministry of defence is advising schools on the war in iraq and the teachers are up in arms (excuse the pun) about it… mod are totally distorting the facts ie not mentioning iraqi casualties etc and teachers are not happy…
it seems is up to us to inform our selves and our youngers…

27 03 2008
Anmarie

“I’ve met a lot of white people who get pissed off when blacks seem ‘ungrateful’ for the things some of them have done for us. Now, these white people know they can blame Abraham Lincoln. It’s not that we don’t appreciate the things you do, it’s that we don’t trust you.” – Tru Dat

They can blame Abraham Lincoln and the Jews who were pissed off because they were forced out of Brownsville schools during the civil rights era. They were upset because Jews had been regular participants in the civil rights movement yet; meanwhile the children in these schools were failing miserably.

They can also blame the white women from the suffrage movement era who’d hold conferences on equality for all God’s children and then leave the black women to clean up the mess left over when the equality speeches were finished.

It’s a racist culture we’re born into and the semi and sub conscious might not always be able to catch up with the well meaning heart.

27 03 2008
Admiral Furious

Lisaturtle is correct. The history books take an almost Yellow Journalistic approach to professing history, and white frankly… it’s atrocious. What kills me even more is that the way history is taught in the united states is not standardized… and some people are given different accounts of what happened over the past 5 centuries than others. This is mostly to blame for the attitude that certain other cultures have about Americas (blacks being lazy and whites being superior). Hell, I remember in college, one Asian girl said to me that slavery wasn’t that bad and blacks complained too much about something that happened in the past. (the two blacks girls who were studying at the next table looked as though they were ready to toss that girl into a volcano). The Asian girl had grown up in Northern VA and had been taught a very 1800’s Southern Version of History… which was just plain sad.

And as for the freeing of slaves being a military/economic strategy… I couldn’t agree more. And today, a similar strategy is being utilized with this whole illegal immigration policy. Heh….

27 03 2008
27 03 2008
Crys

interesting – glad i found this. i didn’t know what to expect when i clicked on that 5 black presidents link, but when i clicked it and did not see bill clinton’s picture, i was so RELIEVED.

27 03 2008
imaG

damn yo, but still abe started the ball rolling so thats wsup. as for the you got abe lincolned pic, shit is hilarious, tell me why that dude is sober as hell and all them girls drunk HAHAHA

http://www.anythingblack.wordpress.com

27 03 2008
london

the internet is a wonderful place used carefully and blogs like these open people’s minds..
i do know that up until a few years ago some asians didn’t study africa at all at school.. completely ignored it… & their view on slavery was you conquer – you enslave…
the japanese disowned their own that settled in s.america – the kids born there were ‘not japanese’… hmmmn
however the truth will out…
one day the books will have to be changed….
it’s all good..
simon schama’s ‘rough crossings’ is a good place to start for black people here and in the usa… it should be required reading… queen elizabeth 1 is not the person portrayed in the movies..
makes me almost want to ditch my job and teach.. however i cannot stand the general public’s kids..

27 03 2008
jumpinjackflasher

I agree. See this post about books for children. It’s tongue in cheek, but still:

http://stuffwhiteparentslike.wordpress.com/2008/03/27/15-childrens-books/

27 03 2008
honeymolasess

well done! the next ignorant dolt who tells me that i should be grateful for the mere existence of ol’ honest abe can kneel before me so that i can gouge their eyes out with a rusted spoon shank and serve them to my dog on a silver trivet.

gah, you have more delightful invective than i do. i, sir, am humbled.
as the duty of literary honor expressly states, i have stolen “fuck you very much”– simply because i love the way it reads and rolls off the tounge.

27 03 2008
Mr. Smith

@ Admiral,

1800 Southern style of history in Northern VA? I’d like to know what school she went to. Doesn’t surprise me one bit, I’m just curious

27 03 2008
Admiral Furious

I don’t recall what school she went to… but I seem to remember that she was from Fairfax County. Mind you this was my sophomore year… back in 1997.

28 03 2008
a.eye

I teach American history and African history in a high school in the midwest. It is really amazing to me how much students DO NOT know. How much their previous teachers have kept from them or misinformed them on. I think part of the reason is that the teachers never learned the stuff themselves. And the way textbooks are written is so white-washed that a person would really have no desire to try and learn more about the white folks they see in those books. It is only after hearing a little bit of the truth that a person would have a desire to learn more and find out what else they do not know. I am fortunate to work in a district where I have some freedom to create a curriculum that shares truth, but I know other teachers who have to follow the same stuff that has been mis-taught for decades.

Crazy.

28 03 2008
Cause Problems

FUCK WHITE PEOPLE! LIE CHEAT AND STEAL… TELL US WE THE CRIMINALS… LOOK A WHAT THE FUCK THEY DUN!

28 03 2008
Uhura

Recorded history is often slanted…

When I was growing up, whoever illustrated history & geography books took great pains to make sure we would never see that Egypt was actually part of Africa.

Egypt would always be shown in a box…with the rest of Africa missing…

I suspect it’s because lots of great inventions came out of Egypt-so it could not be depicted as an African country.

29 03 2008
unknown

Do white people Hate Abraham Lincoln, if so…

A. He freed black people

B. he was a president and changed alot of things

C. they hate him for no reason

choose PLEASE

30 03 2008
zoso

@Uhura

I was having a discussion about this with a friend of mine and she mentioned the same thing, that while growing up teachers made it seem as though Egypt was not a part of Africa. If anything, given Egypt’s period of Roman Rule/Influence, recounts of history often make it seem as though Egypt was a mere extension of other empires (European, that is, with no mention of its Nubian ties/period).

30 03 2008
london

northern africa which i mean broadly as ‘arab’ africa is not counted as africa in the continental sense in the white world
israel competes in the eurovision song contest… (huh??? yeah i know..)
africa is divided into the arab states, israel and and sub saharan africa… the sub saharan bit being ‘africa proper”…it is white history and colonialism that does this….
the trade routes ad islamic (not sure if i should use the term muslim here – feel free to corect me…) states once held great power in europe.. spain was ruled by the muslims for couple hundred years.. ‘sub saharan’ africa traded with these states all through their histories…
it’s complicated but read up on it..

31 03 2008
arevolutionofone

Never heard the Lincoln quotes, but I knew freeing the slaves was expedient for him, not his priority. What is the source for your quotes? Excellent analogy of the guy buying the woman a drink at the bar. Obvious enough for the simplest mind to grasp.

3 04 2008
Miss Cocoa Luv

Apparently I have nothing else to do, but found this story interesting:
http://www.nydailynews.com/ny_local/2008/04/03/2008-04-03_lincolns_letter_sets_record_at_auction.html

3 05 2008
Lincoln rebuttal: who black people hate « The Historic Present

[…] which is either the precursor or follower of the site “Stuff White People Love.” I clicked the link to the site and there, posted on March 27, 2008, was an article about how vile Lincoln was and why […]

2 07 2008
Nick

Wow, this is a little depressing. I thought Lincoln was a bit of an American icon for being the genuine article when it came to equality and decency.

Another bubble burst. 😦

Next you’ll be telling me Thomas Jefferson owned slaves…..

PS – I buy drinks for girls all the time with no agenda in mind. If I’m drunk and happy then I want EVERYONE to be drunk and happy, and if I have to buy them drinks to make it happen, then so be it. 🙂

21 07 2008
N.S

Actually, the Emancipation Proclamation did very little to free blacks. It only stated that the blacks in the rebel states were to be set free, but since the rebel states considered themselves a separate nation, they ignored it. Lincoln only allowed for blacks to be freed after the war because of spite and mounting political pressure from the abolitionists in the North. He didn’t care about us at all.

21 07 2008
N.S

Just to back up your point on the blog.

9 11 2008
Robert Wayne

ROFL…..This is funny. You niggers sound like you hate Lincoln as much as we white southerners do. I’ve always suspected Lincoln was part nigger anyway. And I think you niggers are right about freeing the niggers back then as being secondary to him and the rest of the asshole white yankees. The yankee bastards just wanted to steal what we white southerners’ ancestors had. Don’t blame me for Lincoln. Jeff Davis was my president.

26 12 2008
whitebitch

Heeyyyyyyyyy thur u fucking losers!! Just wanted to tell you this… I am polish and itailian. We had many problems way back when as we’ll. But! I’m not fucking crying about it over and over and over and over again.! Get the fuck over it! History is history for a reason! Its not our fault u were slaved, so stop fucking chanting it! And another thing…. did u fucking know tht u black ppl had black slaves in africa as well? So guess who started it? Yup u guessed it! Niggers!!!!!!!!!! Dumbasses! Whatever the reason was for lincoln to free the slaves, ur still free, are u not?? Or would u rather still be my slave fuckface?and u can’t say tht ur analogy can compare to tht. For wht reason do u not trust us whites? Wht are ancestors did is they’re problems. We can’t trust most of u. Looking all shady and stealing and fucking killing. I’m not saying you’re all tht way. I have many black friends and they are awesome. They know how to act,they’re not fucking ghetto,they’re not loud and rude or obnoxious. Hey I even hate the white ppl tht act dumb and ghetto. So thts all.

6 01 2009
Brody

tCef76pepIMlh

26 01 2009
Aron

Honestly, look at how black people treat whites now in Africa, they are getting killed, run off their farms (zimbabwe for example). Look at what happens every time someone tries to resist the lies (Lincoln half black?!?!?!?) and pc propaganda, they get labeled by the same people that spread the lies. So I guess now in America we will rewrite history to label everyone who was non pc a “fucking asshole”.

28 01 2009
Whittie

At unknown,

The reason some white people hate Lincoln is cause he totally trashed to constitution, suspended heabus coprus, killed millions of people in a war over states rights and northern taxiation on southern states via a tarrif. I also don’t like him cause he is credited with freeing the slaves, when all he did was free the ones in states that were fighting him, thats to say, not in states he controlled. I think its really cool that people are starting to see what a fraud ol’ Abe was.

28 01 2009
kendall leonard

so let him free the slave let him feed them cause you’ll cant do shit about it martin luther king all way love him

28 01 2009
kendall leonard

you’ll some belonele rise people piece

10 02 2009
Matt

Read some books on Lincoln. It’s very likely that the first speech was just to gain him support. The second speech was again, politics as usual. Lincoln’s private feelings on slavery were quite different from those he publicly expressed in office.

Imagine if someone running for president wanted to legalize all drugs. Would they get elected, no? Imagine if they lied about their true feelings and got elected, but then, once in office, tried to legalize some drugs. They’d probably get assassinated. Think about the time in which Lincoln was doing his thing.

15 02 2009
hermine stover

Lincoln also used the US Militia to attack citizens of the UNITED STATES and was the mother of GUN CONTROL. Later on example of the Militia against citizens

KENT STATE for example.

Politicians will say anything. ANYTHING to get votes.

Lincoln’s body guards where the start of the modern Secret Service, and those men back then, who called themselves the SS, which does not endear them at all to Jews Who Know Some History. For one example.

And yet Obama praised him as if he knew nothing but the sanitized history book version of Lincoln.

4 04 2009
WAKUP

Yah Ok u all got a raw deal. But many societies got it much worse. Native jungle dwellers, Tibetans, Native americans (the only decling race on the planet) The list goes on and on and on and on………. One point I see ignored by blacks Is what your life would be like if your ancestors were not brought to this country. How many of u history buffs have studied African history of the past 200 years or so. And of those that have how many would rather be African? Do ya get me here? No 40’s no blunts, no cattys, no colledge, little future little choice. A black man (well 1/2 anyway) is president here that’s choice and opportunity. Lets look Africa…. genocide apartheid diamond slavery tribal wars keepin ur a$$ out of a lion belly. usa seems a little better that that. If I am missing part of the picture here please enlighten me. part of the pic u all r missing is we are all still fu@#ing slaves. u work ur a$$ off to make pennies so you can give them away and do it again tomorrow. They just learned how to create content slaves. wake up and resist slavery now and quicherbichin bout d past. thx for listening. no offense intended. just please wakup so we can all get along.

4 04 2009
WAKUP

Bankers assassinated Abe. He wanted greenbacks instead of federal reserve currency. Federal and world bankers make trillions from loaning you your cash. (bullshit unmonitarily backed cash that they printed and we pay interest just to use). presidents and congress resisted this until the fed was established (and subiquently the IRS which is also illegal read the constitution of usa only congress has right to levy tax) govt. is not for the people by the people. study andrew jackson. “I weep for the liberty of my country when I see at this early day of its successful experiment that corruption has been imputed to many members of the House of Representatives, and the rights of the people have been bartered for promises of office.”
Andrew Jackson “It is to be regretted that the rich and powerful too often bend the acts of government to their own selfish purposes.”
Andrew Jackson “The bold effort the present (central) bank had made to control the government … are but premonitions of the fate that await the American people should they be deluded into a perpetuation of this institution or the establishment of another like it.” Andrew Jackson In short he told us so. WAKUP

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